December 2019

“We have a problem,” the last part cut out as I looked at the phone to make sure Lisa was still there. It had been two months of brief visits, secret exchanges and heart tearing goodbyes. But finally, Lisa was coming home. The movie’s release date was set and in only two more months our relationship would hopefully be out in the open.

“What’s wrong?” I sat down in the kitchen, my mother immediately turning her head upward at the worry in my voice. She put her book down as she tuned into the conversation.

“There was an issue with one of the scenes. The filming didn’t go as planned so they want me to be onset for two more days to film it again.” The frustration was evident in her voice as she cut out again. Through cursed, choppy words, I tried not to sound disappointed as I calmed her down.

“It’s okay, Lisa. It’s not your fault. There isn’t much you could do about it now.” I covered the phone mouth with a hand and explained the situation to my mother. Her eyes softened and once she found out that Lisa was okay she went back to her book. I swear she thought that girl as another one of her daughters.

“I know but it’s your 28th birthday. I want to be there.” I gripped the phone harder. Green Tree Publishing had put together an event to celebrate my birthday. It wasn’t something that I was too happy about though. If I was being completely honest, I just wanted to have my closest friends and family here in my house to celebrate, but Bom had said that this was the perfect event to publicize the book and movie. Of course that had meant that Lisa would be there in the capacity of a friend, but at least she would still be there. And she had promised to celebrate afterwards. Just us. A little party at her place. My body shuddered at the possibilities.

But now I was being faced with being the center of attention with over a hundred people who I didn’t know very well and now there would be no Lisa to get me through the night.

“We’ll celebrate when you’re back after filming.”

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay though?” I could hear her rustling around in her hotel room. Probably unpacking the things she would need for the next few days. I closed my eyes thinking that we had been so close to being together again and not having to worry about each other leaving any time soon.

“You mean without you being there as my buffer?” I heard Lisa chuckle over the line but it was really anything but a joke and we both knew it. I had never liked being the center of attention and Lisa always made it a point to pull any unwanted attention off of me and place it anywhere else. Without her there I was going to be extremely uncomfortable, but I knew I would have to go through with it. “I’ll be fine. Just focus on the movie and before you know it you’ll be home.”

“Home.” She breathed out and the line went silent. “Ow, dammit!” I heard a squeal over the phone and my brow furrowed.

“What was that? Are you okay?” I heard her huff over the phone loudly.

“What? Oh yeah I’m uh-fine. Just fine. Look, honey, I have to go. I’m so sorry about everything. Really. I’ll call you tomorrow after I get back to the hotel. What time are you going to be back from the event you think?” I opened my mouth to respond but I could tell that Lisa’s mind was elsewhere.

“Depends on how early I could sneak out without anyone noticing.” I heard her huff again in frustration but I could tell that it wasn’t meant for me. “How about I call you when I’m home?”

“Uh yeah. That works.” The phone was silent and I had to look at my screen to make sure that she was still there.

“Okay.”

“Okay. I gotta go. Love you.” Before I could say it back the phone call ended and I placed the cell on the kitchen table. I furrowed my brow at it wondering what was going on with Lisa.

“Everything okay?” My mother asked. I looked up at her and forced a smile.

“Yeah. I’m sure she’s just stressed with having to be there for another couple of days.” I ran my hands through my hair, now dreading what tomorrow would bring.

“Don’t worry, sweetie. I’ll be there and so will BamBam and Joy and Sungjae. You have a lot of people in your corner.”

“Not to mention a few dozen reporters and other outlets of the media.” I groaned as I imagined all of the things that could go wrong. I felt my mother’s hand reach for mine and she gently squeezed it in comfort.

“She’ll be back soon.” I smiled at my mother and nodded my head to end the conversation. I had been so excited to have Lisa back and the disappointment was evident that she wasn’t coming home yet. With a soft pat on my hand my mother stood and left the kitchen to get ready for work. I followed her form out as a ‘ding’ came from my phone. I eyed a text from an unknown number. It was a picture of Hanbin in a plane seat giving a thumbs up. I smiled as I responded to him, happy that he would at least be at the event as well. Maybe I did have more people in my corner than I thought.

***

I counted to ten to calm my rapidly beating heart. My mother stood to my left as we entered The Standard Hotel’s rooftop. The large venue opened up to white lights sparkling across all tables and potted palm trees. Caterers whirled around with flutes of champagne and finger foods and I felt my mother nudge me to get moving. I gave her a nervous chuckle as I stepped in time with her own footsteps.

The party was already i