October 2019

“I’m getting on a flight right now and I’m coming home.” I heard Lisa’s heavy breath over the line. I could hear her gathering items from her drawers, there were hangers clanking and the then the suitcase opening.

“Lisa, calm down. It’s okay. I’m okay.” The rustling over the line didn’t stop as I eyed my chin in the mirror. The bruising and swelling had gone down considerably over the last few hours.

“You were in a fight Jennie. I’m coming home.”

“Lisa, really I’m fine. I appreciate you wanting to come but you’re on a tight schedule and it isn’t bad. And I wasn’t in a fight. I broke up a fight between two students and just caught an unlucky punch.” I winced as I remembered seeing the right hook coming from the young football player. I had been in the wrong place at the wrong time, it was as simple as that.

I had agreed to meet Joy after school to spend some time with her before I left town. As I was waiting in the parking lot I had noticed two students getting into a disagreement and then, of course, they had felt the need to solve their argument with violence. As soon as I saw the scuffle, I got out of my car and reacted without thinking. I ran between the two boys but was unlucky enough to catch a punch meant for the boy whom I was holding back. As soon as the punch landed the young man quickly apologized but was taken off by security none the less. I knew it could have been a lot worse. The punch grazed my chin but the doctor had said any higher and I could have been knocked out.

“Plus, I’ll be there the day after tomorrow. You’ll see that it’s not so bad.” I heard her sigh heavily over the phone. She had calmed down considerably but I could still tell she was uneasy.

“I wish you were just here already. So I could see you now…” she trailed off and I held my cell tighter. Lisa had been in New York shooting the movie but I could tell the distance was wearing on her. We had managed to be thousands of miles apart for ten years but now, even the smallest time apart felt like decades longer.

“I wish I was too. But only one more day and I’ll be there. And I’ll get to be on set with you and watch you work. It will be fun.” I smiled over the phone hoping that the action would travel the three thousand miles and lighten her mood. Ever since I had unveiled that I was Randle Gooding the press had been hounding me for interviews and television appearances. I saw myself in random magazines and tabloids and couldn’t believe that they would be this interested in a Korean girl from Southern California. The action had definitely been a boost in PR for the movie and the producers had requested that I come out to New York to watch them film. They had also requested me to help with the symbolism of some of the scenes to get the shot just right. With Lisa being there, I was more than willing to oblige.

“Okay. You win. I’ll stay put until you get here.” She sounded dejected and my heart tore at the tone.

“Thank you.” I chewed on my lip for a few seconds and opened my mouth to say something else but couldn’t get the words out. “You should get some sleep. It’s late there and I know you have an early day.” My voice wavered as I pinched the bridge of my nose. Why couldn’t I just tell her what I really wanted to say?

“Yeah, I know.” She sighed heavily. “Are you really okay?”

I chuckled. “Yes, I’m fine. Honestly. Now get some sleep. I’ll call you tomorrow after I get checked out at the dentist and before you know it I’ll be there, with you, in the flesh.”

“That sounds amazing.” We sat in silence for a few moments, both of us not wanting to let the other go. Finally she said, “Nini?”

My eyes closed at the sound of my name and for a moment tears pricked at the corner of my eyes. The sudden wave of emotion filled me and I tried in earnest to not allow the tears to fall. “Yeah?”

“I…” she just stopped there as my heart sputtered. “I…hope you have a good night.” I nodded over the line and smiled.

“You too, Lisa. Goodnight.” I heard her whisper goodnight again as the call ended. I sat there staring at my cell, my fingers dancing over her name, wanting to call her back, wanting to tell her I love her and that the distance between us was killing me.

I sighed heavily as I yawned and winced at the tightness of my muscles. I whimpered as I flopped down on my back and let my comforter surround me. It was a poor man’s Lisa, but it would have to do for one more night.

***

“Everything looks good, Jennie, but you’ll have to wear a retainer for a few days. The jaw is a little misaligned but this will help it back in place.” I felt the doctor place the retainer in my mouth and I immediately ran my tongue over the metal brace.

“Really?” The pronunciation felt strange as my tongue tried to get used to the foreign plastic in my mouth. I heard Dr. Moody chuckle heartily.

“Just for three days. I promise. Then you’ll be good as new.” I sat up as Dr. Moody handed me the retainer case. “You got lucky, it could have been a lot worse.”

I rolled my eyes. What could be worse than having a mouth full of metal again? Instead of voicing my true feelings, I just smiled and thanked him. Standing up, I shook his hand, ready to get out of the office and take out the offending plastic and metal in my mouth. I figured I could wear it just at night.

“Oh and J, that should stay in day and night.” I looked at him quickly, wondering if he could read my mind. He chuckled again, “I’ve been your dentist since you were a toddler. I know what you’re thinking.” He pointed a finger at me and this time I did find my voice.

“Dr. Moody, I’ll be in New York speaking with high level executives. I can’t have this thing in my mouth. I’m afraid they may turn me away with all this drool.” I wiped my mouth as the man’s eyes softened.

“You’ll get used to it. Give it a day or two and I promise you won’t even know it’s there.” I doubted that but nodded a ‘fine’ just the same.

***

“I’m headed to LAX right now,” I slurred into the phone. My mother looked over at me with a teasing gaze and I stuck out my tongue at her. It’s amazing how I was almost thirty but felt like a teenager at that moment.

“Are you drunk?” Lisa asked. She was on a thirty minute break and finally had time for a quick chat. The Los Angeles skyline came into view over the freeway and specks of light from planes peered through the dark sky.

“No. I have to wear a stupid retainer for the next few days since my jaw is slightly misaligned from where I was hit.” I ran my tongue against the plastic on the roof of my mouth.

“That’s not too bad, it could have been a lot worse.”

“Tell that to my mouth.”

“I plan to, in about eight hours.” Her tone deepened and immediately my face warmed. I looked over to my mother whose smile widened.

“Uh, I forgot to tell you’re on speaker…”

“Hi, Lisa.” My mother choked out trying not to laugh.

“Oh, uh, Mrs Kim. Hi.” I could tell that Lisa was now successfully embarrassed and I nudged my mom’s shoulder.

“Hey, we are pulling up to LAX now. I’ll call you when I get to JFK, okay?”

“Okay. Fly safe, see you soon.”

I hung up after saying goodbye and looked over at my mother who broke out into a light laughter which in turn made me laugh as well.

“You sure you’re okay to go alone?” My mother put the car in park at my terminal and I undid the seatbelt, pecking her lightly on the cheek.

“Of course. I’ll be there soon and Lisa’s room is in the same hotel. I’ll be fine.” My mother nodded her head and I thanked her again for driving me. Gathering my suitcases from the trunk, I waved goodbye as I saw her pull out from the drop off zone. With three suitcases in hand and my retainer filling my mouth I made my way into LAX.

***

“What do you mean you can’t find my luggage?” I huffed out at the woman at the counter. She looked at her computer again and then back up to me and then back at the computer.

“I’m sorry, Ms. Kim. We’ll do everything we can to locate it. There was probably an error in transfer when you had the layover in Phoenix. Sometimes that happens.”

“No, no, no…” I whimpered. I closed my eyes as I tried to discern what I had in there. Only all my clothes, my makeup, my credit cards. I felt myself go sick at the thought. I rummaged through my small purse and grabbed my wallet. Forty dollars, my license and a stick of gum. Why had I decided to put my credit cards in my luggage? Why couldn’t I have just slowed down and thought about how stupid of an idea that was instead of my thoughts purely on getting to Lisa as quickly as possible?

“Of course, we will call you as soon as we find it and then have it sent to you, free of charge.” I glared at her, trying to remember that it wasn’t her fault. I smiled tightly and nodded my aching head. I was five hours late coming into JFK, my second flight from Phoenix being delayed for hours due to some electrical problem with the plane. I had texted Lisa letting her know I would be late but my phone had died before I received a response. I felt disgusting, I was sure I looked a mess since I had spilled coffee all over myself earlier and I only had forty dollars to my name until I could find a bank. The worst part was I needed to be onset in less than two hours. I looked down at my wrinkled shirt and jeans and grimaced. How was I going to get cleaned up and ready in that amount of time?

After leaving the woman my contact details, I waded through the throngs of people to the front. The studio had told me they would send a town car and when I saw my driver holding a sign with my last name, I smiled. At least one thing had gone right.

“Ms. Kim?” The young man asked. I nodded and sighed heavily.

“Yes. Please tell me you know where I can find an open bank and a clothing store?” The man looked at me with a shy smile.

“I’m sorry ma’am. It’s six in the morning. The banks are closed and so are most of the clothing stores but I know of one place that is open right now.” The look on his face made me shiver, but I was out of options.

“As long as it has clothes, I’ll be fine.” He nodded as he looked around me.

“No luggage?” He asked as he ushered me to the town car. Opening my door I shook my head.

“Hence the need for a bank and clothing store.” The light chuckle made me smile despite my bad mood.

“Well, let’s get you to the thrift so we can get you to the studio on time.” I groaned. At least I know I’ll get a bang for my buck.

***

I rubbed my hand over the wool sweater as Gregory, my driver, opened the door. Stepping out into the cool New York breeze I shivered.

“How do I look Gregory?” He smiled a gracious smile and said ‘good’. I knew he was just being polite. The thrift store had nothing that would shout “bestselling author”. Instead I felt like a grandmother with my beige wool sweater, white collared shirt underneath and khaki slacks that were one size too big and three inches too short. I adjusted my glasses and cursed myself that I had left my contact case in my makeup bag. How the heck could I have been so stupid? Matting down my hair that seemed to have decided not to work with me today, I felt like a total frump. I tipped Gregory my last remaining twenty and graciously gave him an autograph. He hadn’t asked but after telling me how much he enjoyed the books I offered and he excitedly accepted. I would still have to get used that.

Security ushered me on the set and took my over to where the director was already shooting. They left me and told me to wait, stating that he would be with me as soon as the scene was shot.

“Action!” I heard him yell. The set was decorated to look like a rundown basement. Water dripping from a condensing pipe that was being gathered by a bucket. Kim Hanbin who played Blake was laying on the concrete, shivering in sweat. I knew this scene well. Blake was feverishly ill, afraid that he had gotten the plague and hallucinating about Holly being there with him. As soon as the vision of the scene entered my mind, I watched as ‘Holly’, miraculously clean in the dirty basement, came into view and acted her soothing lines.

Just watching Lisa took my breath away. She was beautiful, stunning and talented. Being in her presence and watching her work was like watching something miraculous happening.

“Cut! Print! Good job everyone. Let’s take ten.” I watched as Lisa helped Hanbin up and laugh as he groaned from laying on the concrete for so long. I smiled, watching her smile, and as if she knew that someone was looking, she lifted her head up and caught my eye.

“Ms. Kim?” My gaze broke as a deep voice entere