The next day the whole family was buzzing. Everyone was here and the family reunion was scheduled for the next night. The local hall had been booked and Chanyeol wasn't looking forward to being inundated with relatives he hardly knew. To most of them he was just a curiosity, just a rich and famous cousin to be stared at like some sort of zoo animal, just an outlier in their family of regular people. "We're going out for dinner tonight with your grandparents." Chanyeol's mother called out from her regular place in the kitchen as Chanyeol wandered downstairs. Sehun was at university and his dad was at work and something was drawing Chanyeol to relive his pain outside his old school. He had become suddenly aware of his need for catharsis, for closure, and most of all for acceptance. And he needed to go back to find if.

He walked again. Cars weren't really necessary in this small town. Nothing was more than a fifteen minute walk away and Chanyeol chuckled as he called past the bakery. He needed to walk off all the baked treats he had been buying anyway. He walked along the road eating his beesting, past the nursery and around the corner, and finally across the oval to the school. He sat outside as he wiped his hands with the wipes he had the foresight to bring and opened his can of Coke. He thought being back here would make him feel sadder but he remembered he had more happy memories here than sad.

Chanyeol's ill fated season on the basketball team with Baekhyun laughing on from the sidelines. Just because he was tall didn't mean he was good and after many falls and missed passes he gave up on that hobby.

Baekhyun catching a tea towel on fire during home economics and setting off the fire alarms, Chanyeol panicking and tossing the tea towel into a bin, Minseok screaming and throwing a bucket of water over the bin and the floor.

Baekhyun and Jongdae's constant pranks. At the time they used to drive Chanyeol crazy but what he wouldn't give to have that back. To be able to relive Baekhyun's hysterical laughter.

The end of year formal when Baekhyun had just broken up with Taeyeon, again, and Chanyeol knocked back every girl that asked him to be her date, and they went together. Dressed up in their suits they had the best time, dancing and making fun of people, getting drunk at the after party and trying to sneak their way in to Baekhyun's house where they were supposed to be spending the night.

So many happy memories. But there was one particular bad one, the one that changed everything, the last day.

——-

Chanyeol was torn. Confess to his best friend in tears and risk losing it all? Lie and pretend he wanted his best friend's girlfriend? What would be worse? Chanyeol chose neither and ran out of the school in tears. Once he made it outside he dropped to his knees on the grass and tried to regain his composure. He didn't even hear footsteps behind him until Kris was next to him on the grass.

"I'm right aren't I?" he asked with a smirk. "Gay. Totally gay." He chuckled to himself and Chanyeol began to cry again. " off Kris. You would know!" He pushed the other boy backwards onto the grass and got up. "I knew it. You're not even trying to deny it anymore." Kris was laughing. "Anyway stay away from Baekhyun and Taeyeon. He'll never want you and she's sick of you getting in between them." Chanyeol turned to him with fire in his eyes but it was quickly quenched when the slightly taller boy stood up and challenged him. "Let Taeyeon have him Chanyeol. Stop standing in their way. He's supposed to be your best friend so why can't you just let him be happy? Always clinging on to him, never giving him any space, it's actually really pathetic..." The words turned into a blur as Chanyeol began to run before slowing to a walk.

Kris was right. What was he thinking? Could he really have thought that when faced with the choice between him and Taeyeon Baekhyun would choose him? He shook his thick mop of hair as he walked along the lonely road home.

Across the oval, behind the nursery, down the main road of town.

Away from it all. Away from hurt and humiliation, disappointment and rejection, and most of all away from ruining his best friends happiness.

——-

Memories faded as Chanyeol heard a snappy voice behind him. "Park Chanyeol. You've got some nerve." He turned to see his friend, former friend he should say, staring him down. Chanyeol knew that the gentle welcome he got from Minseok wouldn't be granted from Jongdae as well. Chanyeol smiled at him and received a fierce narrowed glare in return. "Hi Jongdae." He said. "It's been a long time." Chanyeol wasn't really surprised that his friend who always loved school ended up as a teacher at their old high school. Jongdae never wanted to grow up and leave school and now he didn't have to.

"8 years and that's all I get?" Jongdae rolled his eyes sarcastically. "Seriously. Did you think it was just going to be fine? Abandon us for your amazing lifestyle of the rich and famous?" Jongdae narrowed his eyes again. "Minseok might be able to forgive you, to put it in the past, but I can't Chanyeol. Not when I've had to spend the last eight years standing in your spot." He sighed as hurt washed over Chanyeol's face. "You ruined himj Chanyeol. He needed you. We all did, but Baekhyun, it was different for him. He changed when you left. He needed you around to stop him from making the wrong choices and you weren't there." "I'm sorry. Ok? I'm so ing sorry. But I can't change the past." Chanyeol felt helpless in the face of his friends anger but he stood there and took it because he knew he deserved it.

"Why?" Jongdae had calmed down enough to ask the question on everyone's mind. But Chanyeol couldn't answer him truthfully. He was still so afraid, the rejection and humiliation, the fear of exposure just as real now as it had been all those years ago. "I was just in the way." He sighed. "I couldn't stay and get in the way of his happiness." He turned to walk away and was surprised to feel Jongdae grab his arm to stop him. "What are you talking about Chanyeol?" Jongdae shook his head in confusion and let out a sad laugh of exasperation. "You were his happiness. And when you left him you took his joy with you. He was never the same."

Jongdae took a deep breath as his voice trembled. "He's been through so much Chanyeol. If you had just stayed in his life, I don't know, maybe he wouldn't have wasted all those years with that mean . Maybe he would have followed you to the city....." Jongdae frowned again. "I know you're not telling the full story Chanyeol. Come back when you're ready to be honest and maybe we can start to be friends again."

And with that he turned and walked away from Chanyeol and Chanyeol realised he was starting to understand how they all felt when he walked out on them.