As soon as he heard the front door close, Taehyung dropped himself on one of the kitchen chairs and let his tears flow freely. He wasn't sure how they had gotten there or why he'd freaked out like this, but he felt it tearing at his heart. What had he done? Was it for the best? Would it be alright? Or had he just ruined everything?

He had no idea how long he sat there, unable to move. When he finally broke out of his rigor, his tears hadn't fully dried yet, but he pulled himself to his feet and looked at the table. Their plates with their untouched dinner were still in the same place and the bottle of wine stood next to them, unopened.

Taehyung looked at the food, but he had lost his appetite, so he walked over with heavy steps and took the plates from the table. He put everything back into the pot and put the lid back over it. Then he washed the plates and put them back on the shelf.

He slowly turned to look at the bottle of wine and sighed whereupon he grabbed the clean wine glasses and also put them back where they belonged. Then he looked back at the wine bottle. He couldn't just throw it away, so he put it on the shelf too, but he already knew that he'd have to make up an excuse when Namjoon would see it. He was too exhausted to think about that now, though, so after he had cleaned up the kitchen he just went back upstairs to his room and lay down in bed. The house sounded so utterly silent and empty and Taehyung felt the same. Empty.

-

On Sunday afternoon, Namjoon returned from his trip and went straight to the kitchen to cook something for them, but when he opened the fridge, he saw a box of cooked food there, so he went upstairs to greet Taehyung and ask him about it.

He stepped up to the door of his room and knocked on it. After a moment, the door opened to reveal Taehyung.

“Hey Tae, I'm-” he started but before he could finish the sentence, Taehyung had thrown himself into his arms, hugging him tightly. Namjoon was a bit taken aback, but immediately wrapped his arms around his little brother to return the crushing hug.

“Hey~...are you okay? Is everything alright?” he asked softly and rubbed his back as Taehyung sighed.

“Wasn't feeling so well and missed you...” Taehyung mumbled and clung to him even tighter. Namjoon was a little worried, he had rarely ever seen him behave like this.

“I missed you too...are you better now?” he answered and Taehyung nodded into his shoulder, hugging him for a few more moments before he let go of him.

“Did you cook? I saw the food in the fridge.” Namjoon said and Taehyung felt his heart drop. He had managed to eat a bit of the food on Saturday, but there was still quite a lot left. But he was aware that Namjoon knew perfectly well that he wasn't the best cook, so he said the first thing that came to his mind.

“Uhm, yeah, Jimin came over and we tried it together.” he said. Poor Jimin. His best friend had somehow turned into Taehyung's number one cover-up story.

“I guess we should just eat that first then.” Namjoon said and Taehyung nodded before they went downstairs. When they entered the kitchen, Taehyung went to the fridge to take out the box with the food while Namjoon went to get plates for them. He stopped in his tracks when he noticed a brand new wine bottle standing on their shelf whereupon he turned to Taehyung with a raised eyebrow.

“Tae?” he said to get his attention and his little brother turned to look at him.

“What's that?” he asked and pointed at the bottle. Taehyung blushed a little and opened his mouth. He couldn't just blame it on Jimin again, so he rubbed his neck and looked at his brother bashfully.

“Did Jimin bring it?” Namjoon asked, but Taehyung shook his head.

“No it was me, I bought it, but as you can see, we didn't touch it.”

“I don't mind you two drinking a little now and then, but I'd rather go buy the stuff for you than to know that you somehow weaseled your way through and bought it yourself.” Namjoon said and Taehyung looked down.

“Sorry...” he mumbled and turned back to the food. Namjoon turned back to the bottle and eyed it up. Something felt strange, he recognized that bottle. When the penny dropped, he was even more confused. It was Hoseok's favorite sort and it wasn't exactly easy to get nor was it cheap. But Taehyung had said that he met with Jimin. Why would he meet with Hoseok anyway? Or rather why would he lie about it?

But maybe he was just reading too much into this. Maybe it was just a coincidence...but what if it wasn't...?!

“Where did you buy it?” he asked as he brought the plates over to Taehyung. The younger male didn't look up at him as he tried to let his answer sound nonchalant.

“Just at a supermarket somewhere in the city.” he said and filled their plates. He had a little flashback to Firday night and felt it pulling at his heartstrings. It didn't really feel right to eat this now, but it was too good to throw away.

Namjoon just answered a “Hm.” and took one of the plates to put it into the microwave. Then he turned to see Taehyung staring at the other plate absentmindedly.

“You said you weren't feeling so well...?” he asked softly and his question had seemed to pull Taehyung out of his thoughts since the boy looked up at him.

“I had a headache since Friday and I just...was in a rather bad mood.” he said and Namjoon eyed him up with a little bit of concern.

“And Jimin wasn't able to light up your mood?” he then asked and Taehyung sighed. He hated lying to his brother, but he had no choice.

“Not really.”

“Wow it must be serious then. Jimin is a ball of sunshine and he's your best friend, he always manages to cheer you up, Tae. What's going on? Is there anything you want to talk about?” Namjoon said and looked at him with furrowed brows. Taehyung didn't meet his eyes as he answered.

“I'm fine, I just had a bad day or something, really...” he said, but Namjoon didn't quite believe him. He eyed him up once more before he decided to drop the topic. He didn't want to push Taehyung. They had always had a good relationship, so he was hoping that if his brother was having serious problems, he'd eventually come to him and talk about it.

-

A few days later, Namjoon met up with Hoseok for coffee and they talked about work and Namjoon's trip. Everything was normal, at least that's how it seemed. Hoseok was always a sunshine and had learned to perfectly fake a smile and cover up how miserable he actually felt.

At some point their conversation ended up at Namjoon talking about the situation when he had come back from the trip.

“When I came home, Taehyung was acting strange.” Namjoon said and Hoseok looked up curiously, hoping he wasn't being too obvious.

“How?” he asked nonchalantly and took a sip of his coffee.

“He hugged me like the world was ending and said that he'd just been in a bad mood, but I have a feeling that he wasn't completely honest with me. I don't like it when he lies to me.”

“He's a teenager, it's normal that everyone has their little secrets.” Hoseok said to try to comfort Namjoon, but after saying it out loud, it sounded stupid and cliché. Besides...Hoseok had not ever seen Taehyung as some hormonal immature teenage boy, that was rubbish. Not even when Taehyung had freaked out the weekend before, not even then could Hoseok feel anything bad about him.

“I get that, but I feel like he's in trouble or really not feeling well...I want him to tell me, but I don't want to push him. I guess I'll just have to wait until he comes to me on his own.” Namjoon said and sighed as he also took another big gulp from his cup. Just then, he remembered about the wine bottle. He had almost forgotten about it, but as he was sitting there with Hoseok then, it came back to his mind.

He looked over at his best friend and watched him drink his coffee. Hoseok was acting normal, as ever...the only thing Namjoon noticed was that he'd been a little quiet. He contemplated speaking up about it, but decided against it.

It really must've just been a coincidence...but still, it lingered in the back of his head.

-

The next weeks, every morning started the same for Hoseok. The first thing he did was to grab his phone and check for new messages, hoping to see one from Taehyung, unaware of the fact that Taehyung was doing the same thing every morning too, hoping Hoseok would've texted him, but neither one dared to be the first one to reach out.

Until one day.

It had already been more than a month since that evening and Jimin had noticed that Taehyung wasn't fine, but his best friend refused to talk about what had happened, so all Jimin could do was to try to cheer him up. After they had gone out to spend their time and have some fun, it was already quite late. Taehyung had taken the last bus towards his quarter and was walking home. It was a little chilly and he was only wearing a thin jacket. He was a little drunk and wanted nothing more than to fall into bed and sleep, but when he arrived at the front door and searched for his keys, they didn't seem to be there.

“No, no, no...please...” he mumbled and searched every one of his pockets as he started to panic. He cursed at himself and ran a hand through his hair. He must've left them inside the house. They didn't have a spare key and Namjoon was once again out of town, so it slowly dawned on him that he was screwed.

“You gotta be kidding me, Taehyung, you're so stupid...” he murmured to himself. “I should've just slept over at Jimin's.”

But it was too late now. At this hour, there wouldn't be any buses anymore and it was too cold and too far to walk there. He could've made it, but he was tired and he would probably end up getting a cold. He searched his pockets for money, but what he found wouldn't have been enough for a taxi.

Taehyung plopped down at the stairs and dropped his head into his hands. He was seriously contemplating to sleep at the stairs or break into his own house, but it was stupid. After a fight with himself, he pulled out his phone that didn't have much power left. He considered calling Namjoon, but it was in the middle of the night and he was too far away. He couldn't do this to him, no way. Calling Jimin wouldn't lead anywhere and he didn't want to burden his best friend either.

He scrolled down to Hoseok's contact and sighed.

“I can't...I ing can't...” he mumbled and groaned. It took him several more minutes of staring at his phone, before he finally pressed 'Call'.

He was feeling guilty and bad and his heart was going crazy in his chest, but he didn't know what else to do. After several calls, Hoseok picked up the phone with a hoarse voice.

“Taehyung?”

Taehyung thought he must've woken him up and felt even worse then. He bit his lip and gathered his courage before he started sputtering: “H-Hi, I'm sorry for calling this late, I-I was with Jimin and then I went home and I forgot my keys and Joon's out of town, I don't know what to do and I didn't know who else to call I-, It's cold and I'm tired, I-”

“I'll be there as fast as I can!” Hoseok answered and hung up. Taehyung blinked, looking a little perplexed as he lowered his phone, his heart beating happily in his chest as he waited. He still felt a strong guilty conscience though.

It was getting colder every minute and he wrapped his arms around himself, shivering a little. After 10 minutes that felt like an eternity, Taehyung heard a car and looked up. It was Hoseok's. He parked right in front of the house and Taehyung got up, his head hung low as he got into the passenger seat. He didn't dare to look up and fastened his seat belt.

“Thank you...I'm so sorry, I know it's late...I'm so stupid...” Taehyung mumbled.

“It's fine Tae, really. I told you to call me if you need anything and I meant it.” Hoseok said with an unbearably soft voice and reached out to touch Taehyung's cheek.

“Damn, you must be cold.” he said and turned up the heater in his car before he drove off. Taehyung's cheeks had flushed a little more than they had already been from the cold, but he still didn't dare to look at Hoseok after what had happened between them. And since Hoseok hadn't tried to contact him, he was sure that it was over anyway...

That thought threatened to crush his heart or drown him, but he was barely holding himself together, trying not to think about it too much. But now that he was a little drunk and sitting in Hoseok's car, so close to him, he felt like falling apart right then and there.

They stayed silent in the car and the tension was nearly unbearable. Neither of them knew what to say or where to start, so the drive to Hoseok's apartment felt like an eternity.

When they arrived, they both got out of the car and Taehyung followed him inside.

“I'll prepare the couch for you.” Hoseok said and disappeared for a few moments. Taehyung's heart sank a little and he sighed as he took off his shoes and looked around a little.

Hoseok soon returned with a few blankets and pillows, putting them on the couch. When he looked at Taehyung, he noticed that the boy was still shivering a little. He wanted nothing more than to pull him into his arms and warm him, but he didn't dare to...he had done enough damage...

So he tried to get away from him, before he'd get weak again and said: “I'll go back to bed, if you need water or food, feel free to look into my kitchen...Tell me if you need anything else...”

Hoseok then went to his bedroom and closed the door after him. His behavior seemed so cold and distant to Taehyung, it was shattering his heart into pieces. He slowly took off his pants and his jacket until he was left in a shirt and his underwear. Then he sat down on the couch and let reality dawn on him. He had ruined it, he had ruined everything. Was Hoseok over him? Done with him? Had he never actually felt anything at all?

He couldn't bear all the painful thoughts that were running through his head. There was no way he could sleep when his heart was aching like this, knowing that only a door was separating him from Hoseok.

-

Hoseok lay in bed, but he was as far away from sleep as humanly possible. Only one thing on his mind. Taehyung. Just when he thought he was about to go crazy, he heard silent knocks on the door. He immediately stumbled out of bed and opened the door. His heart dropped when he saw Taehyung looking at him with big eyes, the traces of a few tears glistening on his cheeks, looking beautiful as ever.

“You said I should tell you if I need anything else...” Taehyung mumbled and bit his lip. Hoseok couldn't help but follow the motion with his eyes.

“What do you need?” he asked and Taehyung gathered all of his courage.

“You.”

It knocked the breath out of Hoseok's lungs for just a moment before he reacted. He slid his arms around Taehyung's waist and pulled him to his body as he caught his lips in a kiss. The younger let out a desperate sound and wrapped both arms around Hoseok's neck, melting into the kiss. They poured in all of their longing and their passion for each other that had been locked away for more than a month. Hoseok gently backed him up against the door frame and deepened the kiss further, apparently trying to make Taehyung understand how much he had missed his perfect lips. Taehyung pulled him closer and tangled his fingers in Hoseok's hair as they made out passionately. When Hoseok broke the kiss they were both panting, but he immediately went on to trail kisses along Taehyung's jaw and down his neck. Taehyung gasped softly and gripped at his hair as the older male gently and at his soft skin, worming soft sounds out of his mouth. Taehyung's head was spinning and he wasn't feeling cold anymore. He then grabbed Hoseok's shirt and tugged it up.

“Off...” he mumbled breathlessly and Hoseok pulled it over his head, tossing it somewhere before he grabbed Taehyung's shirt to do the same with it. The younger one obediently lifted his arms and let Hoseok pull his shirt off. When it was off, he blushed a little, though. His heart was jumping around in his chest as he placed his hands on Hoseok's chest and let them slowly trail down to his abs. Hoseok hummed and trailed soft kisses over Taehyung's face.

“I missed you so much...” he whispered and Taehyung shuddered.

“I missed you too, I-...H-Hobi I'm so sorry-” Taehyung started babbling, but Hoseok put a finger to his lips.

“Shh~...not now...” he cooed and removed his finger to kiss him again. Taehyung gave in and trailed his hands back up to Hoseok's shoulders, gripping at them as he returned the kiss needily. Hoseok roamed his hands all over Taehyung's body and pressed their hips together, causing them both to moan softly at the friction. Taehyung's cheeks flushed a little, but he eagerly pressed back to Hoseok, who suddenly picked him up, spreading his legs and holding him up against the wall. Taehyung bit his lip and clung to his neck as he wrapped his legs around Hoseok. The older lifted his face to look at Taehyung as he ground against him. Taehyung's mouth was agape and his eyes fell shut as he let out a soft moan.

“You're so damn beautiful...” Hoseok mumbled and Taehyung whined as he gripped at Hoseok's hair.

“Stop t-that...” Taehyung brought out breathlessly, but Hoseok ground against him harder and started kissing at his neck again, mumbling against his skin: “You take my breath away, Tae...you feel so good~...I love your skin~”

Taehyung shuddered and moaned as he tugged at his hair whereupon Hoseok let out a groan that echoed through his body. Taehyung arched into him and tilted his head more as Hoseok carried him over to the bed and eased him on it, hovering over him. The younger one was panting a little as he looked up at Hoseok who affectionately brushed Taehyung's hair out of his face and then leaned down to kiss along his collarbone. The younger male closed his eyes and played with Hoseok's hair who proceeded to kiss at his chest. Taehyung felt his heart pounding under the other's kisses and felt it speed up as Hoseok over one of his s. He felt a tingling pleasure that spread goosebumps on his body. It was new to him and he felt nervous, but as Hoseok kept and at his , he gave in to the feeling and arched off the bed, gripping at the other's hair.

“Hoseok~” a moan tumbled from his lips and the older one grazed his teeth around the sensitive area whereupon Taehyung gasped and tugged at his hair. Hoseok let out a low moan and then started kissing his way down Taehyung's abs. The boy started to get more nervous again and trembled a little as Hoseok kissed around his hips. His hands were caressing Taehyung's waist as he kissed along the waistband of his underwear. Taehyung squirmed a little, feeling nervous and torn. When Hoseok dipped his fingers into the waistband to pull it down, Taehyung gasped and gripped at his hands, squirming under him and letting out a frustrated sigh.

“D-Don't-...Hobi, I-...I don't know I-” he babbled and Hoseok crawled up to his face, gently pinning Taehyung's hands to the bed.

“Tae...do you trust me...?”

Taehyung blushed furiously, but nodded. Hoseok leaned in to brush their noses together before he kissed him softly.

“Let me make you feel good, Taehyungie...I promise I'll stop if you really want me to.” he hummed into his ear and Taehyung calmed down a little, feeling more excited than nervous now. Hoseok laced their fingers together and kissed his way down again and this time, Taehyung closed his eyes and let him.