~

I wasn’t sure when it had happened, but somehow we were all in the hospital surrounding the treatment room Seung-Ho was currently in. I had tried everything to steady my shaking and my breathing, nothing was working but after a while it calmed and I stayed leaning against a wall for support.

The others weren’t doing so well either. Ji-Soo was pacing up and down the corridor, So-Hee had been crying for a while and Soo hadn’t said a word. Watching him try and be strong also helped me to sober up from my stupor a little.

Wiping my eyes free of tears I stumbled upon So-Hee who was suddenly staring daggers into me. She sniffled and used her forearm to wipe the snotty concoction around her nose.

“You.” She croaked as her eyes remained fixed on mine.

I flickered my eyes shaken by the venom in her tone.

“W-what?” My throat had been throbbing in soreness from the crying that it came out in a rough whisper.

“What did you do to him?” She asked.

“I didn’t-”

“You must have said something to him, what was it? What did you say to him?”

“I-I didn’t say anything.” I held a hand to my head as it started to pound in pain and the flashes of the earlier hours began to flood back in.

“Sure you didn’t.”

“Stop it So-Hee.” Myung-Soo warned.

“Mighty boyfriend to the rescue.” She scoffed whilst eyeing the both of us but stopped to focus a little longer on Soo. “Yah Kim Myung-Soo, do you really think she loves you?”

“Don’t speak about things you know nothing about.” I hissed.

“You can think what you want So-Hee, but this is the wrong place and the wrong time to be talking about it.” Myung-Soo finished.

“What better time than this, I’m pretty sure it was all her fault anyways.”

“So-Hee just stop it!” Ji-Soo yelled, catching us all of guard as we all drew our eyes on him. “I’m sick of this! Do you seriously think this is the right time for one of your jealous rants? Huh? Seung-Ho is lying in there – our friend is lying in that hospital bed bleeding and this is what you’re doing? Sit down and grow up or just get the hell out of here because Seung-Ho doesn’t need it.”

I stood silently, gazing at an infuriated Ji-Soo who proceeded to continue pacing the corridor of the hall. When I turned back to So-Hee she had sat down and began to fidget with her fingers.

Although Ji-Soo was speaking to So-Hee what he said also hit me and decided to sit down on the hospital floor disregarding all the times my parents told me not to do so. I looked around again in the silence and only realised that we were the only people there.

I felt Soo sit beside me and I sunk my head between my arms. Was it really my fault? Did I say something wrong?

At that time the treatment room doors slid open and out came the doctor along with two nurses. We all rushed over hoping that this guy would provide answers to the burning questions in our minds.

“How is he?” Soo asked.

“Mr Yoo is now in a stable condition. We’ve administered the treatment that he requires, but…”

“But what?” Ji-Soo pressed.

“Mr Yoo has asked me to keep the details about his health private and as his doctor I will hold onto that request. If you’ll excuse me.” The man in scrubs said, yet that wasn’t what we wanted to hear.

“Can we at least check in on him? You know, see how he’s doing?” Soo asked.

“If that is what the patient is okay with then of course, but if he refuses then I’m afraid you will all need to leave. We will let you know when he wakes from his slumber.”

From his slumber? He made it seem like Seung-Ho had fallen asleep like a baby and hadn’t just been unconscious from a fall.

The doctor walked past us and I found the nearest seat to rest my legs. I slipped my feet out of my heels and massaged them. Soo sat beside me and took over the job as his hands worked their way around my toes.

“How are you feeling?” He asked.

I took my time to think about it, but there was nothing I could say. My emotions could not be put into a comprehendible sentence. Heck, I didn’t even know what I was feeling. I was a burning pool of emotions and I was slowly drowning in it.

“The exact same way you are.” I whispered. He didn’t respond after that, we continued to sit in a silence we’d all created. I couldn’t help but think that if things had been the same between us and this had happened tonight we may been a bit more supportive of each other and comforted each other through the night.

But that wasn’t the case. We were all sat in our own isolated areas, brought together for a collective reason, but our hearts in different places.

No one dared to leave the hospital without knowing Seung-Ho’s state. We all sat quietly and waited. When the nurse informed us that Seung-Ho had woken up my watch read 6:15am.

The nurse led us into Seung-Ho’s room and as I stepped foot inside it I noticed that it was unusually cold. I couldn’t help but think that this was way below the right temperature that a patient would need. I was the last to go in so as the Myung-Soo’s back disappeared from my vision and revealed Seung-Ho laying on a bed I faltered.

The beeping of the bedside monitor induced flashbacks of the time when he was at the University’s infirmary, swollen, beaten and bloody from the encounter with his mother’s lover’s son. I clenched my fist willing myself not to cry again.

None of us had spoken up. We stood inaudibly, all likely having the same thought; what happened? What happened Seung-Ho? I wanted to scream that question out at him, but I didn’t.

I doubt it would have helped.

“S-seung-Ho-yah…” Ji-Soo started, but was immediately followed by a croaky voiced Seung-Ho.

“I’m going blind.”

Surplus quiet had filled the room and it felt like time had stopped and we were all replaying his words in our heads.

“w-what?” We all said in unison.

Seung-Ho continued to stare ahead, not making eye contact with anyone of us.

“I said I’m going blind. I won’t be able to see anytime soon.”

“N-no…” I mumbled. Just then the doctor opened the doors and walked towards Seung-Ho.

“Doctor, is it true? It’s a lie right? Seung-Ho, d-don’t make jokes like that.” So-Hee muttered.  

The man, now dressed in a white coat, glanced at Seung-Ho engaging in some sort of eye communication and I was just dying to know what exactly it is they were saying.

“Would you all like to speak in my office please?” He asked and neither of us responded verbally, we simply followed him into his office.  

“What’s he saying? Blind? Yoo Seung-Ho?” Ji-Soo spoke frustrated.

The doctor let out a regrettable sigh of air, rubbing his eyes underneath his glasses. “It’s true, well partially that is.”  

“How? When?” Soo asked.

“Well, blindness can come from a penetrating injury like a gun shot or a non-penetrating injury like a blast in combat. That wasn’t the case for Seung-Ho.” He paused and I wanted to shake the words out of him. Call me ignorant, but I just wanted to know the problem. Why was he telling us things that didn’t pertain to what Seung-Ho had?

“Blindness can also be caused by injury to the back of the head or… In Seung-Ho’s case excessive beating.”

“B-beating?” I repeated. “He was beaten?”

“Seung-Ho was first admitted to me a few months ago for passing out after he was accidentally overbeaten by one-”

“Accidentally?” I questioned. “What kind of person accidentally beats a man till he gets damage enough to make him go blind?” I hissed.

“Who did it?” Soo seethed.

“I am not aware of those details; all I know is that Mr Yoo is my patient and I will do my best to treat him.”

“What’s this about him going blind?” So-Hee voiced.

“Injuries to the brain can induce a number of issues behaviourally and functionally-”

“Could you just get to the point, please.”

“Mr Yoo has lost some of his visual abilities. We conducted surgery on his eyes about three weeks ago hence the stitches you saw, but that was a temporary solution to treat the outer damage, the real issue is within the brain areas that allow the eyes and the brain to communicate-”

“So he’s going to go blind? Totally?”

“As for now I cannot say… Our experience with troops returning from war or under training seems to suggest that total blindness isn’t as common as other visual losses, but…”

“But that’s not to say that it won’t happen.” I finished off with a whisper.

“Yes. The chances are still there and after the fall he had last night we’ll need to run more tests and scans on him.”

“Impossible.” So-Hee teared.

The doctor shook his head, “He was advised multiple times not to drink or even leave the hospital, but he said he needed to go. Something about having to see someone for the last time. If not for that we wouldn’t have left him – no we shouldn’t have, I apologise on the behalf of the hospital.” Doctor Yoon, I had only noticed stood up and bowed deeply to us all.

I looked around the room and saw that everyone was in tears, So-Hee was having a break down, Ji-Soo had grown weak and leaned on the desk for support. Myung-Soo held me in his arms as his chest shook from his own tears.

I wanted to hold on and I did for a while, but the need to leave the room grew stronger by the second. I wanted to run out of there and out of the hospital completely.

So that’s exactly what I did.

I unfolded myself from Soo’s hold and walked out of the room and through the hollow hospital. As soon as I stepped through the exit of the hospital the sh