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I twisted and turned in my bed, the feeling of a light shining on my face being unfamiliar to the usual darkness I woke up to. I never did like sleeping with my curtains open.

I shuffled around trying to adjust to it, but there was something that felt different about my bed however, it was a bit stiffer than usual and the fabric of the sheets were of a rougher texture. Squeezing my eyes I twisted some more as if it would smoothen out the more I did so, but instead of feeling more sheets my neck rubbed against something strange.

The last thing that I had expected when I opened my eyes was a warm body behind me and my head using its arm as a pillow.

What kind of situation is this?

My mind was starting to wake up and it was telling me that my petite frame was cradled against a very bare and well-defined chest.

Making slow and small movements I turned around so that I was now on my back. I closed my eyes firmly taking in deep breaths. I hoped that once I opened my eyes again this wouldn’t be real and that this would all be a dream. A really weird dream.

I tried to wrack my brain for what happened last night, but I couldn’t remember. The most I could recall was that I planned to get on with my essay, had yet another argument with So-Hee, there was a faint image of a neon lights... and what seemed like a can of beer.

Oh God, what have I done?

It must have been the shock of waking up in a strange environment, because there’s no way that I could not remember last night. The only thing that was plausible now was that this was either really a dream or I had gotten absolutely drunk, found a random stranger on the street and sold myself out of emotional frustration.

Well done So-Hyun-ah, you can’t even remember who in the world you gave yourself to.

Do I look? Do I not? I tried to reason in my mind. At least if I didn’t look now I wouldn’t need to remember him, meaning that I would be able to walk around campus not worried about having to run into him. Deciding to do just that I jumped out of the foreign bed. I didn’t even attempt to pay attention to the décor of the room, seeing as I had only one goal in mind and that was to get out of there as quickly as humanely possible.

I sighed in relief, noticing that my skirt didn't depart from my body and went to find the rest of my clothes before whoever it was woke up, but just as I had managed to pull the soft fabric over my head a voice halted my movements.

I bit my tongue; the feeling of instant regret and nausea creeping its way into my stomach.

“Are you okay?” His voice was too smooth and too chilling for the early morning, enough to send shivers down my spine.

What would be my next move? Should I pretend that he isn’t there or do I face the confrontation of doom? Mid deliberation, I heard shuffling and soon I felt the same warmth on my back. My heart was stuck in my throat because there was no way I was going to forget the fragrance of his apple-scented shampoo.

I shook my head in denial, this can’t be what I think it is. It’s a dream. There’s no way I would have spent the night in the arms of my best-friend’s boyfriend.

No absolute way.

“So-Hyun-ah…” His steady voice came again, reminding me once more that this wasn’t an illusion and neither was last night. His arms soon enveloped my stomach and he was now holding me, his chest pressed firmly against my back.

I swallowed hard, my heartbeat was skyrocketing and my hands were trembling. All of a sudden at the sensation of his touch, like fingers flicking through a book, the memory of last night came running back to me.

I remember walking to his building, knocking on the door, comforting him and…gulp… lips. Lips were definitely involved. 

I felt myself wanting to lean back into his embrace and for a millisecond I wished that this wasn’t real. I lifted my hands to his and tore them away from mine as I stepped forward, losing the heat he provided. I turned around and looked him dead in the eyes.

My jaw tensed trying to suppress my emotions, because even in the midst of my guilt he looked attractive in the morning. My eyes drifted to his chest, the chest that not too long ago had my stupid body stuck to it and I clenched my teeth.

“What happened?” I questioned, and it was ridiculous of me, because I already knew.

“You don’t remember?” He asked, his tone lower than how he spoke a few moments ago. He let out a small breath from his lips and scratched the nape of his neck. I watched, yet again unsure of how to read his face. “We… we slept together last night.” He confessed bringing his eyes back to my own.

My eyes widened, and I gasped. Impossible.

“No, I mean we slept together, b-but not like that…”

“God.” I put a palm to my face, I had already deduced that much so I didn’t know why I was acting even more surprised. “W-why didn’t you stop me? Oh no, what about So-Hee. What am I going to do? You should have stopped me!” My voice was slightly raised, and my eyes began to wet unwillingly.

“You really don’t remember… do you?” To his question I gave him another bewildered look.

“Did something else happen?” I tried to say it in a way that would signal that I didn’t want him to continue, but I could sense that he didn’t seem to catch that.

There was a long pause before he spoke again. 

“We… weren’t drunk. I met you outside my door, I was kind of a mess and hugged you. We talked for a while, you err… You confessed to me, one thing led to another and here we are.” He said lightly, his eyes squinted displaying that he was taken aback and confused. “Wait, did you drink before you came here?”

I bobbed my head slightly at his question and whispered “Maybe.” I wasn’t a lightweight and I only had a sip of my beer meaning that I didn’t actually drink so the idea that I had a little bit too much liquid courage wasn’t computing well with me but perhaps it would with him.

He knew everything about me, including my tolerance level for alcohol, but since he wasn’t present at the party when my lips barely touched the beer can, he wouldn’t know. Or maybe he would, I wasn’t behaving like I was drunk last night but telling him that I wasn’t would make this all the worse and more true- I couldn’t handle any more truths this morning.

“Oh no, what do I do about So-Hee.”

Seung-Ho let out a scoff so small that it would have almost been inaudible if I wasn’t paying close attention to him, like I always did. Shaking his head a little he asked as if he was offended, “Y-you drank? A-and why do you keep bringing up So-Hee when this is about you and me?”

It was now my turn to scoff, my eyes drifting around the room trying to look at anything but him. “Wah, I knew that most guys liked to fool around, but I never really pinned you as the type. To think that I even liked you.” I muttered, fighting the tears from my eyes. “I’ll think about whether I’ll tell So-Hee first- no. I mean I will tell her, maybe you should do it first, but for now… I need to leave and you... I think it's best if we don’t talk anymore.” Not like you did a lot of that anyway.

I should have been less dramatic and more rational as I was speaking to him, but there was nothing rational about this situation. I shouldn’t have been in the arms of my best friend’s boyfriend all night. Or anyone’s boyfriend at that.

I moved to go to the door but when my hand grasped the handle, I felt his own hand tug on my free arm spinning me around and bringing me face to face with him. I stepped backwards, my back hitting the wooden door and my breath hitching at the unexpected proximity.

My clothes were on and by my recollection of things nothing extreme happened last night, so why was I feeling so exposed?

He was staring at me as if he was reading me, studying and memorising every little detail about me. His eyes were questioning me, and I was forced to look at him, not willing to give him the answers he was looking for.

But who am I kidding, this is Seung-Ho. He could probably see right through me.

His fingers lifted to trace my cheek and I shuddered, hating myself for being familiar to his touch after one night. I took a glance at his lips, then to his eyes and all of a sudden he was getting closer, his hands making their way down to my waist.

I could feel my resolve breaking down, my muscles grew weaker and before I knew it my lips had parted unconsciously and unintentionally inviting him in.

He lingered for a little while, allowing his hot breath to tickle my skin and seduce every one of my senses.

When his lips finally made contact with mine, I stupidly welcomed them. I let out a shallow breath as my hold on the door slowly loosened and I curled up my fists.

His lips were soft, warm and everything I had ever needed, but never knew. He kissed me as if there was nothing wrong with it and as if we had done this plenty of times before.

The care that he took with kissing me reminded me that this was my first kiss. However the memory of the last night was rapidly resurfacing to correct my thought. My first kiss was actually last night in his room and on his very bed.

His gentleness undid me and it was dangerously addictive as I found myself wanting more. Lifting my hands to circle around his neck I pushed myself forward and pressed my lips harder into his. He swiped at the seam of my lips and I granted him access, his tongue moving expertly to massage mine in the most breathtakingly way possible.

When he broke apart, I wasn’t ready and so despite my horrid shame I ended up nibbling on his bottom lip a little.

He connected his forehead with mine and took a few moments to catch his breath before speaking softly, “You never let me get a word in.”

At the sound of his voice I opened my eyes and met his stark orbs. Biting my lips I quickly released my hold on him and cursed myself for making yet another mistake. “Oh no.” I breathed.  

Seung-Ho was still holding onto me however, “Do you regret it that much?”

I paused my self-chastisement to look up at him my mouth forming an unconscious pout. “Don’t you?” I returned. “Yes I regret it. This shouldn’t have happened… Last night shouldn’t have happened.”

He nodded his head heavily, closing his eyes with a sigh. “Did So-Hee say something to you? Why do you keep getting sensitive about her?”

“You seem to have a lot of words to say to me today.” I commented with a bitter tone, “Why else would I mention So-Hee. Maybe you were the one that drank, do you tend to forget your girlfriend’s name so easily?” I asked rhetorically before escaping from his hold unaware and uninterested of the expression on his face.

“You can’t just go, we need to talk about this.” I heard from behind me and he tried to bring me turn me around, but I didn’t budge. “Kim So-Hyun.” He purred, and I paused.

He shouldn’t call my name. Not like that.

I ran my tong