Bang YongGuk

I looked at the girl sat in front of me it's been ten days since we spoke our heart. I was holding my file in my hands and frowned. She was smiling to me as if she  was really happy to see me. I couldn't believe how genuine her feelings were. It felt surreal. Last night, I had trouble to sleep. I had to give her my file with all the testimonies, the court judgement and everything. To keep dignity, I had to ask her something.

"  I have something to ask you. " I warned her.

" Sure. " She said, with an encouraging smile.

Silence surrounded us for a few seconds. I had to tell her. " You can read everything ... but you have to promise me one thing, don't look at those photos. I wouldn't survive it."

She seemed a bit shocked. "Yeah. I promise. Pinky finger ?"

I looked at her fingers and her encouraging smile. I slowly reached for her hands, to link our pinky fingers. We stayed like this for a long time.  I held her hands  for a few seconds being really distracted by how nice it was to hold hands with her. It was the only physical contact allowed in the parlor room, except if you can attest a particular relationship, like your wife visiting or your kids. We held hands during the two hours talking about books and the movies she saw recently. I felt just good and reassured seeing her hand in mine and I kept fidgeting her ring.

When she got ready to leave with the file, she squeezed my hand before leaving it. My right hand suddenly felt empty.Daehyun brought me to my cell in silence. "You're lucky to have her in your life. When I think your family didn't come even once."

I made fist out of my hands. "Enough, Daehyun."

He nodded,  apparently aware he said too much. After I was on my bed, he left locking the cell. I made myself comfortable on the thin mattress and sighed. I miss my mother, some days more than others. She counted a lot for me. She insisted for me to get a high education and integrate Seoul University. I messed up everything. My mother didn't come at all since I got here. I wasn't their unique child. My little sister was seven when it happened. She would be thirteen soon. I had no idea what she looked like. My parents surely made my name a taboo in their house. I was fond of my little sister, so much that she would always greet me by a huge hug each time I came back home each sundays. She must miss me or maybe she just forget about me. YongJu. My adorable little sister must have forgotten about me or hate me.

Great. When I'll go out of there, she'll be twenty years old. She would have grow as an adult without me.

I sighed. I hated to think about this.

*

I entered the NGO my parents created and some persons instantly stood up to bow to me. I felt a bit embarassed. They didn't have to show tha much respect to me. I was just a kid. I asked to talk to someone and instantly a woman came to hug me in her arms.

"HaSeul !! Come here I'll give you some coffee. I'm glad you came to visit."

Kim Gina was an old friend of my parents, she was a high school friend of my mom and always supported them in their NGO project so much that now she is the one running it. She lead me into her office, which was my parents one. I looked at their photos on her wall for a long time.

"I miss them so much, they were real role models for me. I still can't realize." She whispered, her eyes teary.

She looked at me stare at that photo and softly gasped. "What am I saying ?!! You must miss them the most. They were your parents."

I had  a cirsconstance smile and she moved on, changing subject. I hated to talk about them, to anyone.

We talked about trivial things for a long time, she asked me about my work, my relationships, my friends, the house. She always made sure I was fine whenever I came to see her. As I put my cup of coffee on the table, I decided to tell her why I came here. "I have a favor to ask you."

I took the file and gave it to her. "I started to volunteer, visiting prisoners in my free time and there is this guy that killed someone but he didn't have any intentions to. He got twelve years, is there any possibilities to reduce his sentence  or something ?"

She looked confused for a little bit then read the file with attention for a few minutes. My heart was beating so hard in my chest. Please, I needed her help so much. For YongGuk sake.

Gina looked at me and closed the file. "From what I just read, he got convinced for murder when it's accidental manslaughter, manlaughters means the death wasn't what was the person looking for, in clear an accident. You're visiting  him ?"

"Yeah hearing about his story I thought it was so unfair. I needed to do something and I thought you could help me." I explained a bit. She started to look though the files and I looked away as she started to look at the photos. I promised him I wouldn't look at them.

We conversed once again about the facts and Gina sighed. " I'll help you. This guy needs a good lawyer and an audience to reduce his sentence, twelve years is too severe. Can I keep the file ?" 

I nodded. "Yeah you can keep it. I'm so thanksful you are helping him."

She smiled to me, and touched my face. " HaSeul you grew up a lot since we've last met, I'm happy you came today. It really makes me emotional you chose to help this man. Your parents will be proud of you. "

I sighed. Of course it would happen, the comparisons. "I'm not sure of that. I won't lie to you. I like this man and think his situation is unbearable. That's why I want to help him. I'm not a martyr or as engaged as my parents would ever be. "

She widened her eyes at my sentences. I didn't even blush and gave her an harsh look, I was tired of people comparing me to my parents and linking everything I was doing to my parents. She suddenly laughed. "Gosh you just talked like your mom Sorry, your mom was blunt just like you. Sorry, I'll stop bothering you with them. I'll visit him soon. Don't worry I'll help both of you "

*

Bang YongGuk

When Himchan told me Kim Gina was waiting for me, I was confused and it took me time to remember HaSeul told me her parent's friend would visit me. I walked there, a bit shaky, wondering what type of woman it was. As I entered the parlor room, she stood up and walked to my side.  She tried to reach for my hand. "I'm Kim Gina, the President of the NGO for prisoners rights. HaSeul told me about you."

I shook her hands, suspicious. She was smiling and very outgoing. We talked about the facts for a long time. I told her about the mother of the guy wanting me to root in prison for a long time. My ex girlfriend testifying against me when she saw everything. I sighed after telling her. She took notes of what I said and I wanted to scoff. What this woman could do to help me ? My situation was helpless. She smiled to me as she saw I was staring at her, wanting to read her intentions and I composed myself. She was very warm.

"Are you going out with my niece ?" The woman said.

I choked. I heard Daehyun gasping in the back and she was still smiling to me. "She told me about her feelings for you. It's the first time I saw her this determined. I was gladly surprised. How is she with you ?"

She looked very understanding. As if she was just helping me to fill a form for university or something, when we were in a parlor room in jail. I scoffed. "You're not against it ? You won't do anything about it ? I'm a prisoner."

"If there is one thing her parents couldn't do is controling her. HaSeul is a smart child. It's been forty years I talk with prisoners. I can te