Marks POV

I spent the next couple weeks trying to avoid Donghyuck. But its hard avoiding someone who is in your class and sits next to you in both. I stopped sitting at his table at lunch and went back to sitting with Lucas and his friends.

I’ll admit. It was lonely not being around Hyuck. His constant teasing, and the smell of his strawberry shampoo.

To be able to tell you why I was avoiding him, I wouldn’t be able to tell you. I didn’t know the answer myself either. I just couldn’t be near him. It felt strange.

**

“Why aren’t you with Donghyuck and his friends?” I look over to Jungwoo. “Just missed you guys.” “Really? Because the other day when we had plans to hang out you blew me off to go see a last-minute movie with him.” I look away. “Well I felt bad for that. That’s why I’m here.”

**

“A little birdie told me that you have a crush. I want to know why I was literally the last to know about this. Even Kun knew before I did!” I regret coming over to Johnny’s. “No, I don’t. and who’s the bird?” “No one in particular, but they did tell me.” “Was it Ten?” Yes, now tell me who you have the hots for?” He paused the tv. “No one” “Hard to understand you with all that bull in your mouth.” I look at him. “I know who you like.” “Well then if you knew then why you pestering me?” “HAH! So, you admit you like someone!” “What if I said I did? Would you then leave me alone?” I say with annoyance. “Damn, who pissed in your cheerios this morning?”

**

*BLING*

Long John Silvers: 👀 👀 👀 I know who you like

He- is he for real? “I’m sitting two feet from you” “I’m aware”

Long John Silvers:

Long John Silvers:You like Taeils lil bro don’t you Squidward?

Me:bLoCkEd

**

No ones POV

Mark found himself driving. Not knowing where. He rolled the widow down and opened his cigarettes and took one out and placed it between his lips. He took the lighter out of his pocket and looked at it for a second. The lighter Donghyuck gave him. He deeply sighed. He kept thinking back to that night at prom. He was going to kiss him. But why didn’t he? The truth is, Mark still didn’t understand his feelings. He didn’t understand why he was getting himself all worked up over this. It’s not like they were even together. He didn’t understand anything that clouded his mind. He didn’t know if he wanted these feelings. He didn’t understand the way his heart picked up the pace when whenever he was with him. He didn’t understand why he felt like he had the worst heartburn feeling in his chest when he saw him dancing with Renjun or kissing that boy. He didn’t understand why Donghyuck would act as if he was interested in him. He wasn’t stupid. He knew how the younger felt about him. Well he thought he did. He noticed how Donghyuck would stare at him, how he would lay his head on him, and cuddle up to him, how he would tense up whenever Mark initiated skin ship. Why would he lead him on? Something in Mark told him that Donghyuck wasn’t that kind of person. If he didn’t like him that way he would have told him straight up. But he wasn’t sure of anything anymore. So why? Is all he kept asking himself.

**

*10:12 pm Saturday*

Mark found himself driving to Donghyucks house. He sat parked on the other side of the street. He looked at the house debating on weather to go up and knock on the door or to just drive away. He choses the latter. Just as he turned the car on he saw Donghuck leave his house. He got in his car and drove away. Mark wanted to follow him. But he didn’t.

Once again, he found himself driving. He drove til he was low on gas and had to fuel up. He didn’t care about the mileage he was adding up. He didn’t care about anything. All he wanted to do was sort his mind out. He didn’t care how late it was getting. He wanted answers and he seemed to no be getting anywhere. It drove him crazy. He decided enough was enough.

Mark turned up the radio til he couldn’t hear himself think. He didn’t want to think. Every time he did he thought about Donghyuck. The more he thought the more confused, angrier, and hurt he became.

**

Mark didn’t notice the tears streaming down his face. He didn’t notice how his heart was breaking within him. He didn’t notice how he found himself in the Park parking lot. He didn’t notice the car parked on the other side was a familiar car. He didn’t notice how he stared blanking out the windshield.

My heart is weak

Tear it down piece by peice

Leave me to think

You've taken my breath away

Now I want to breathe

'Cause I cannot see, what you can see, so easily

I thought my demons were almost defeated,

But you took their side and you pulled them to freedom

They know my secrets and won't let me go, won't let me go

Lost underneath

Deep in my structure, I feel a rupture,

From where she should be

He didn’t realize how hard he had fallen for him. He didn’t notice how his world seem to crumble and had no idea why. He wanted to ignore the burning feeling in his chest. He didn’t notice how he wasn’t alone in the parking lot

**

Donghyuck got out of his car and walked to their spot. He climbed up the ramp and just stood there. He stared out at the river. He looked at how the moon shined down on the water. He for a second, just one split second felt a sense of peace. That moment was gone when felt that same wrenching feeling in his gut, he had not felt since he left him. The feeling of self-hate. The feeling of breaking inside for the millionth time. He hated how his ex’s words got to him. ‘I’m just like you said, useless, pathetic, little me. Damn him. Like I can do better. Like I got a chance with him. I really am pathetic. He was right. He was always right. Always had to be. I thought I got rid you, tossed him out of my ing life and you’re still getting the last damn word’ Is all he said to himself. He hated how he didn’t understand why Mark was ignoring him. Mark ignored his every call, every text, he even ignored him at school. He hated how he didn’t have Mark there to comfort him. Donghyuck hated how weak he felt. He hated himself.

**

*2:56 am*

Mark found himself at Jaehyuns house. He didn’t know where else to go. He called his phone and waited til the older picked up. “Hello?” “Jaehyun, I’m outside your door, can you let me in?” He said with a scratchy voice. “What?” “I’m outside your house.” “I’ll be down in second.”

Jaehyun opened the door and was meet with a puffy eyed, red nosed Mark. “What happened?” He asked with much worry in his voice. While bringing the younger inside “I, I feel so stupid.” “What do you mean?” “Its Donghyuck.” “What about him?” The older asked with concern on his face. “I don’t understand him. I thought he liked me, but he’s with someone else I guess. He came off as he liked me, now I’m just confused.” Mark rambled out. “Mark slow down. Jeez you gave me a heart attack. I thought something bad happened to him. Now just breathe and slowly tell me what happened.” “Donghyuk has a secret boyfriend.” “huh?” Jaehyun deadpanned “Did he ever mention he had a boyfriend?” Mark had yet to tell the whole only ranting about prom night. “No.” “Then how could you be so sure?” Mark becoming frustrated. “Because I know what I saw! He was kissing someone else Hyung what else do you want me to say?!” “Don’t shout, my parents are sleeping” Jaehyun stage whispered. “And what the hell you on about?” “Prom night, I was going to kiss Hyuck, but I chickened out because I- I- I didn’t know if I go through with the consequences, ..then he walked away, and I went to look for him and when I had found him I saw him locking lips with another guy and I’ve been avoiding him for a while and now and I literally have no idea why, its just every time I’m around him I get all weird, my heart a breathing does a thing and I just don’t know, now I’m here and I’m so confused! Hyung help me!?” Mark was practically gasping for breath as he slightly flung himself at Jaehyun desperate for answers. Mark held onto Jaehyun as hot tears ran down his cheeks. Jaehyun didn’t say anything and just rubbed comforting circles onto Marks back as waited for his friends to calm down.

Mark had explained everything as best he could. He sat and waited for his hyung to say anything. “You like him Mark. There’s no sugar coating it. You have feelings for him whether want to or not. Things like this just happen. Look at Sicheng and Yuta for example. Them two can’t stand each other sometimes. Not to mention Yuta’s outrageous jealousy if anyone comes within three feet of winwin. Then you have Lucas and Jungwoo. Complete opposites. One’s eccentric and the other is quite most days. Then you have Taeil and Doyoung of course-“ “Lets not” “But you get what I’m trying to say? You can’t fight fate Mark. No matter what you do, you’ll somehow always wind up right back in that starting position.” “But I just don’t understand. How did you know you liked Taeyong?” “Not everyone’s the same Mark. Well find ourselves in different ways.” Mark sat thinking to himself. “I just don’t get why he agreed to go with me to prom if he already was with someone else.” Mark become irritable once again with himself for all his unanswered questions. “How do you explain that!? How can you sit here and tell me that I like him and that this fates game? Well fate! feelings and Donghyuck!”

**

From the room next door to Jaehyuns was his younger brother Jeno was currently on the phone with two boys subject of matter.

“I’m sorry Hyuck, could you say that again? My brother has one of his friends over and they are being loud as .” Jeon groaned. “Never mind it doesn’t matter Jeno. I’ll just talk to you later, I’m gonna try to get some sleep. Goodnight.” Jeno could hear the exhaust in Donghyucks voice and was rather concerned but chose to let the other rest. “Okay, well I hope you get some rest, I’ll see you later. Night” When the latter hung up the phone he grew more irritated by the muffled shout from behind his bedroom wall. Jeno had gotten up and exited his room to go shout as his loud sibling when heard a familiar name from behind the door. Jeno knew eavesdropping was bad but curiosity killed the cat.

“Mark you need to calm down”

“No! This is all Donghyucks fault-“

At the name of his friend being thrown and his anger towards the older in the room he barged in. “His fault? His fault? If it’s anyone’s fault its yours!.” Jeno said whilst pointing an accusing finger at Mark. “If you didn’t like him, you didn’t have to lead him on and then drop him. Honestly that’s a boy move.” The two older boys just stared at the younger. “Let me tell you something Mark. It didn’t end well for the last guy who hurt Donghyuck and it wont end well for you either. You think I’m pissed wait til Jaemin and Renjun get a hold of you. No one will be there to save you not even Hyung, how does that sound you big baby boo?” “You make it sound as if they are going to do illegal things” Jaehyun who was just surprised at his brother’s poor attempt at a threat. “Define illegal? And, just watch out on Monday just be glad I’m even giving you guys a heads up.” With that he walked out. Mark and Jaehyun sat bewildered. “Great, not only do I have to avoid Donghyuck, now I have to avoid his friends too. What’s next?”

A/N: This was the worst chapter ever and I’m sorry. I’m gonna be honest this was filler chapter. Not much happened. But I promise the other chapters won’t be bad. Just know the story will be getting angsty. Also update on my health I’m doing much better now. but remember when I thought I had the flu? Turns out I have GERD/severe Acid reflux. I’m mean I’ve always had AR but now its bad. But no worries I’m completely fine. I promise lots of people live with GERD Its not horrible thing its just a digesting problem it can resolve its self in most people. I just have to watch closely what I eat to avoid another flare up and take the proper medicines. Just thought I’d let you guys know. Also, I may start using other Troye Sivan songs to title these chapters, ya girl can only do so much with one song. But it’s a maybe. Last thing the song used in this chapter was Demons by Jacob lee. This a/n its getting too long. Love ya! ~Joey 😊