“Please Taehyung.” Yuna flopped down dramatically on his desk, crumpling his notes and giving him a puppy dog look.

“No, now get off, you’re distracting me.”

“Pleeaassee.”

He groaned. “God, I said no, I don’t want to go to your boyfriend’s stupid party, now can I study in peace already?”

“Please, please come on!” She plead. “You guys agreed to get along, so why is it even that big of a deal to come? And other than that, it’ll be fun, I promise!”

Taehyung closed his eyes, feeling impatient. “I don’t like parties, especially ones thrown by spoiled rich kids. And if I had a say in things, I wouldn’t even be letting you go either.”

Yuna sighed. “OK, but what if I already said you’d come?”

“What? Why would you do that?” He snapped.

“Jungkook has this really pretty friend named Jae-eun that I met recently, and I really, really want you to meet her. She’s so nice and cool and hot, and I really think she’s your type.” She got back up and sat on his bed, rummaging through her bag to find her phone.

Taehyung watched her quietly, fiddling nervously with his pencil. How was he even supposed to tell her that he didn’t like girls? It wasn’t exactly an easy topic to bring up. She her phone in his face then. There was a picture of a girl with long black hair, strawberry red lips, fair skin, and really beautiful eyes. Taehyung had to admit she was really pretty, but he still didn’t care too much for her.

“I already showed her a picture of you Taehyung, she thought you were really cute. So I said you’d be at the party and you could meet up.” Yuna continued. “Come on, you’re always locked up in your room studying, it’s like you barely have any time for yourself anymore. Please, I want you to find someone that makes you happy too, at least give her a chance.”

Taehyung sighed. She only wanted the best for him like he wanted for her, and she was right, he barely got out that much anymore. Mainly because he was too afraid, after his awkward date with Jisu, he was scared that someone else would find out his secret. But maybe Jae-eun was different. It’s not like he had to go out with her or anything, they could just hang out for the night and see where things go. He could relax his mind for a little.

“Fine.” He eventually gave in.

“Really? Oh my God, oh my God, yes! Thank you so much, I promise you won’t regret it.” Yuna hugged him tightly.

He smiled softly at her, glad they were slowly starting to get back to normal.

But it wouldn’t last forever.

**

Friday came as fast as a speeding truck, and Taehyung immediately got nervous all over again, regretting ever saying he'd go. He tried to back out at the last minute by pretending to be sick, but Yuna dragged him out of his room and forced him to change into something nice, saying he was going or else.

“Agh, my heart, I think, I think I’m having a heart attack.” He coughed loudly as he pulled on the shirt she picked out for him.

“You’ll survive, now hurry up and get ready!” She snapped.

“Wow, thanks for your concern!” He called back and she started laughing.

“Come on, I want to see what your outfit looks like already.”

Taehyung grumbled and opened the door, feeling embarrassed.

She looked him up and down. “Ooh yy.”

“Hey, chillax, I don’t look that good.” He muttered.

“Do you not think you’re attractive or something?” Yuna quickly ran a hand through his hair, pushing it out of his face. “Your eyebrows are your main asset, you need to show them off more.”

“Yeah, yeah, now can we go?” He slapped her hand away and headed towards the door, grabbing his coat. “You have the address right?”

“Don’t need one, I’ve been to his house a few times now.” She smiled.

“What-”

“We didn’t do anything calm down. As a matter of fact, we haven’t really done anything since the last time you caught us on the couch.” She trailed off. “I think he might just be nervous.”

Taehyung thought it sounded kind of weird too, that Jungkook of all people still wasn’t trying to have with her so quickly. But he was glad, because maybe he’d actually developed some common sense in the couple months he’d been with her. That having in a relationship wasn’t just everything, but it was more about the emotional aspect too and he had to consider her feelings.

He kept thinking about how good he’d be in a serious relationship as they got into the car and started driving towards his house. But would he ever be brave enough to get into one? When the hell would he accept who he truly was instead of hiding it? He sighed, for now, it was just easier to keep everything secret. But eventually he’d reveal it, and he’d meet someone really amazing.

He’d be happy just like Yuna.

They drove for a while until they reached a large lot that held one of the biggest houses Taehyung had ever seen. There were actually a few in the area about the same, overbearing size and it made him kind of envious just to look at them. But it put things more in perspective too, just how different Jungkook and Yuna were. Yet he still stayed with her this long and seemed liked he really liked her, almost as if he didn’t care about where she came from. It was just about his feelings now.

Taehyung parked across the street from the house, along with the a million other expensive brand cars. Hoseok would have loved to be there too, he’d flip over how nice the cars were. He was sure Yoongi would think they were cool too.

He inspected a few, admiring their finishes and design but Yuna quickly pried him away. “Stop getting distracted you nerd.”

Taehyung crossed his arms in a huff. “How many of these parties does Jungkook’s parents even let him have anyway?”

“They don’t care, they’re barely ever around. Their schedules are way too busy.” Yuna shrugged.

“Oh.”

They reached the door and she rang the bell, Jungkook answered a few minutes later. He was wearing a white shirt that exposed a lot of his chest and Taehyung tried not to look but it was kind of hard. He hated to admit it but he looked really handsome, especially with his messy black hair and large earrings. Everything just seemed to fit perfectly; no wonder girls died over him.

Yuna embraced him tightly and they started making out right in front of him.

He pretended to gag but quickly hid it when they pulled apart. Jungkook set his black eyes on him and he felt his gaze was kind of intimidating.

It was still tense between them, even after all that time. No matter how hard he tried, he still always could never trust him deep down. But that wasn’t the time to be thinking about it, so he forced a smile. “Hi.”

Jungkook just nodded then took Yuna’s hand. “Come in.”

Taehyung followed behind them slowly inside and was taken aback by how beautiful the interior of the home was. Even though there were a lot of people crowding around and taking up most of the space, his eyes caught the paintings that lined the walls around them. He’d always had an interest in art, something about the elements and aspects of a simple painting always intrigued him.

He noticed the replica of the Starry Night painting then and gasped, looking at it carefully. There was always something about Vincent Van Gogh’s work that calmed him and made him feel at ease, especially Starry Night. It reminded him of when he was younger for some reason-

“Taehyung what are you doing? Come on.” Yuna tugged at his arm and he looked away, Jungkook was watching him quietly. They started moving through the crowd and Taehyung could feel people’s eyes on them. It felt weird, kind of like they were stripping him bare.

He guessed it was a big deal seeing the infamous couple together in public like that.

When they reached the living room, Taehyung immediately noticed Jae-eun leaning against the wall talking to another pretty girl. She was holding a flute of champagne in her hand and was laughing happily. She had on a pretty flattering dress too, but it wasn’t as distracting as Jungkook’s chest.

“Jae, this is Yuna’s brother.” He told her and she glanced at him, giving a quick scan.

“Hi.” She smiled sweetly and Taehyung immediately froze up, she was really pretty.

“We’ll leave you two alone.” Yuna gave him a quick shove forward and then disappeared with Jungkook.

“I’ll talk to you later OK?” The other girl said to her and gave Taehyung a quick smile, giving him a quick once over too. Did he really look that good?

Jae-eun tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, revealing a dangly earring that Taehyung was sure was diamond encrusted. “Do you want something to drink?”

“Uh, sure.” He muttered and she lead him towards the kitchen where there was a platter of expensive looking champagne flutes. Taehyung tried to control his hand from shaking as he took one, but it wasn’t working.

“Are you nervous?” She asked curiously.

He laughed. “Was it that obvious?”

“I think it’s cute.”

Taehyung smiled, not really sure what to say.

“So your name’s Taehyung right?” She tilted her head at him.

He nodded. “Yeah, but you can just call me Tae I guess.”

“Oh, Tae and Jae, what a perfect pairing.” She smiled sweetly again and Taehyung felt his heart flutter. Why was she even having an affect on him? Maybe he was just forcing himself to feel that way, because he wanted things to work out; for Yuna’s sake.

Someone turned up the music then and Jae-eun rolled her eyes. “Do you want to go talk somewhere where it’s quieter?”

“Um, sure.”

She took his hand and lead him down towards the basement where there were fewer people. They took a seat in the corner and Jae-eun crossed her legs, leaning closer towards him. Taehyung sipped awkwardly on his drink, trying to avert his eyes to anywhere but her chest which was even visible in the dark.

“Tell me about yourself Taehyung, I’m curious.” She said then.

“Um, I don’t really know where to start.” He chuckled.

“Like what do you like, what are you interested in?”

He thought back to the paintings. “Art, but I’m not exactly the best drawer. Except I think if I had more time to practice, I’d be pretty skilled at it.”

Jae-eun frowned. “Why don’t you have any time to practice?”

“School, taking care of my sister, just trying to be a parental figure in her life and support her.” He spoke softly.

“Wow,” Jae-eun sounded surprised. “It sounds like you do a lot for her.”

He gave an embarrassed laugh. “Yeah, I guess I do. I mean, our parents died when we were pretty young, so I’m the only person there for her you know?”

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry.” She put her hand on his.

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it.”

Taehyung felt kind of relaxed as she started rubbing his knuckles slowly to comfort him. “It must be kind of rough seeing her dating Jungkook then, considering how many girls he’s been on and off with.”

He never forgot. “Yeah, it was at first, but I guess it’s getting a bit better.”

“Hm.” Jae-eun fell silent, looking like she was lost in thought.

Taehyung took another sip of his drink, why did it suddenly feel tense between them?

“Do you think he really likes her?” She spoke up then, catching him off guard.

“Uh, I mean, I think so. I still can’t really say for sure.” He wracked his brain for a proper response, but couldn’t think of anything better.

“In my five years of being friends with him, I’ve never seen him this committed to someone; it’s just kind of weird you know? So unlike Jungkook.”

Taehyung looked at her and nodded, remembering Misun had said the same thing. “Yeah, I guess.”

She leaned closer, suddenly closing the distance between them. Their faces were only inches apart. “So what about you? Are you interested in anyone Taehyung?”

He blinked. “Uh, I-I don’t, really know.”

“Are you sure?” She whispered, looking down at his lips.

Taehyung closed his eyes on instinct, already knowing what would happen next but still not wanting it to happen. He’d remember the girls he’d kissed a long time ago, when he used to enjoy it, but this kiss felt rushed and uncomfortable, only influenced by the heat of the party and not from real emotions.

Taehyung realized then just how badly he craved something real, the emotion fell on his chest like a crushing weight. He wanted someone to hold him when he was afraid at night, to laugh with him when he was sad, to kiss him softly, to look at him like he was the only person in the world. But he couldn’t have that, he could never have that, because-

“Taehyung?” Jae-eun pulled back slowly and gave him a concerned look. “Why are you crying?”

“W-What?” He touched his cheeks, could feel the wetness on his fingers. His stomach dropped. “Oh, I, um, I-I’m sorry, I didn’t meant to,”

“Hey, it’s OK-” Jae-eun tried to reach for him again, but he pulled away.

“I’m sorry, I think, I think I need some air.” He stood up and stumbled back towards the stairs. When he reached the kitchen he almost tripped forward, but held onto counter, trying to stable himself and control his emotions.

“.” He hissed, slamming his fist down. He knew he shouldn’t have went out, he should have just stayed home alone, like always, where he belonged-

“Hey.” He heard someone’s voice then over the loud music and he glanced over. It was a group of about four girls, who were staring him down like he was their prey. One of the girls stepped forward, glaring hard. “Tell your ugly sister to stay away from Jungkook, you both should know your place.”

He couldn’t even react before she threw her champagne in his face.

“Trash.” She hissed and then walked away, her friends following closely behind her.

Taehyung trembled, trying to hold the tears back, but he couldn’t. He was angry, he was sad, he was confused, he was lost. Everything was overflowing all at once, but he had to contain it, just like he always did.

He dipped his head and pushed through a few people to get to the washroom. He gripped the sides of the sink, his hands shaking uncontrollably and he closed his eyes.

“Let me tell you something important OK? Whenever you feel sad and really want to cry, just let it all out, don’t hold anything back.” He remembered his mom’s faint voice then, talking to him so many years ago. One of the only things by her he could properly remember. “It’s OK to be sad sometimes Taehyung, it’s OK.”

“N-No,” He sobbed, he didn’t want to cry. He was supposed to be strong for Yuna, how could he protect her if he was this weak-

The door opened then and his heart jumped; he’d forgot to lock it. He snapped his eyes open and grabbed the handle quickly, trying to close it back.

“Sorry, I’m-” He looked up at the person that came in.

It was Jungkook.