Member: S.Coups

Morning. Excruciating morning.

Nothing could ever compare to the pain that you are feeling right now. It pierces through your entire womanhood and lacerates the muscles in your body. Like a sharp edged knife, it tears every single tissue inside you.

You are all prepped for school but you are still rolling around your bed in your uniform. If only the pain would stop in an instant. You pick up your phone, left with no choice, as you dial a number.

"Seungcheol."

"What? I'm eating." He nearly ended the call when your voice echoed in his ear.

"Ya!" You raise your voice at him. At the very least, he should listen to what you are about to say.

"What's your problem?" He returned your exasperation before finally recalling the reasons why you get real irritated. Either you fought with your boyfriend or no way— "Red day?"

"How do you know me so well? I love you." Now when you're sweet talking like this, he knows you need something.

"You should atleast say that with sincerity." His voice is low when he responded.

"What?"

"I said why don't you ask your lovely boyfriend to buy those pads? It's embarrassing for me."

"If you're embarrassed then what more will he be? And, I'm not asking for pads. I only need a pain reliever so buy one along your way."

"Whatever. Hang up, I'm eating."

"Would you eat faster? I don't want to run late aga—" He ended the call because if not, you'll begin with your nonstop talking again. "That punk."

Seungcheol finished his food at once to get to you quick despite being grumpy about it. He may not show it but he cares for you a lot in his own ways not just as a bestfriend, but mostly like an older brother. He looks after you all the time and you're more than grateful.

"Good morning." The pharmacist greets him. He smiled back.

"Do you have any medicine for stomachache? Wait, technically not the stomach but the part where it hurts when ladies get their, um, well, period." Seungcheol looks like he's having a fight with himself. The pharmacist understood him anyway, she chuckled shortly before nodding.

"Dysmenorrhea, you mean. Here." The day just started, he hasn't even settled a foot at school but he already had his allowance deducted because of you. He doesn't really care much about it though. "For your mom or for your sister?"

"Not for them."

"So for your girlfriend? I knew it." She carefully handed him the small plastic bag.

"Yeah, girl friend."

"I suggest you also buy this.", pertaining to the chocolate bar displayed at the counter. "Chocolates release happy hormones. It can help remove her grumpiness."

"Give me two then. I think I need it more." He just knows that this is gonna be a stressful day for him.

He marched to your house, which is not really that far from his, just about two blocks away from the pharmacy right across their street. He didn't know that he'll need the chocolate as soon as he arrives at your residence because your boyfriend is waiting right in front of your gate.

"Dude." He nods at Seungcheol.

"Hey." Seungcheol awkwardly greeted back. He's not really close with your guy and they're uncomfortable together but he tries to put up with him for you. "Why don't you get in instead of waiting here?"

"Uh, actually I didn't tell her that I'm coming to pick her up today."

"Why?"

"Element of surprise?" He's definitely putting himself in danger. Surprise is the last thing you want anyone to do for you. You hate everything that is unplanned and Seungcheol knows better than your boyfriend.

"Surprise? Oh," Seungcheol ran out of words. Just thinking of how you would react to this is enough to make him speechless. "I'll get her."

Seungcheol opened your complicatedly designed gate easily as if he lives there, clearly shows how often he's been to your house. As he opened the door, your mom just knew it was him.

"Have you eaten breakfast?" She called out from the kitchen. He went to greet her first.

"Yes, mom. And guess what?" He rested his elbows at the mini bar while watching your mom prepare your lunch. "Her guy is waiting outside."

"Then let him in."

"He won't get in. He said it's a surprise." He has his voice real low as if sharing a very crucial information.

"Oh my god." Your mom remains calm. "He's trying to get himself killed."

"Well." Seungcheol shrugs. "I'll inform her before this gets worse."

"That's best. Go then, I'll pack lunch for you."

"Thank you." Seungcheol hugged your mom from behind before getting you.

Sometimes when he's really clingy to your mom you think like she seems to like him more than you, her own daughter. It's fine though. Anyway, Seungcheol is like a brother already.

***

"Are you serious?" You panic as soon as Seungcheol told you the unwanted information. Good thing you already ate the pill you asked him to buy.

"Why would I even joke about it?" He retorted as he opens a pack of chocolate. "But I bought this to calm you down. Here." He shove a piece in your mouth, you almost choke if the thought of the surprise doesn't dominate your mind.

Super annoying.

Surprises are not really a big deal but you just entirely hate the thought of having to react to it. It burdens you and pressures you a lot. Having things planned and laid accordingly is better than taking anything out of the blue. It's not a good attitude and you are trying to work on it but you can't be ready for it as soon as today. Especially because you have your period.

"I'm not supposed to tell you about it so act surprised, okay?" You glared at him shortly.

"Ugh, I hate this!"

"Aigoo," He clicked his tongue. "This is why you shouldn't date guys you don't know well and guys who don't know you well."

"You're the only guy who knows me too well, Cheol. Don't even suggest." You slung your bag and flew out of the room, almost banging your door. Your mom heard the heavy footsteps as you come to the kitchen to get your food.

"Calm down, honey."

"You didn't have to bother, mom. I can just eat cafeteria food but thanks." You kiss her cheek goodbye as she sends signals to Seungcheol. Seungcheol gave her a thumbs up before following you out of the door.

Just as said, your boyfriend is waiting outside when you walked out. You tried to act surprised despite the fact that you already knew about it and hated it before it happened. Seungcheol wants to laugh on your face for your awkward reaction but he couldn't do so after seeing your boyfriend buying the act. He can only shake his head.

Now, next to all this is Seungcheol's unbearable thirdwheeling. It's somewhat a usual thing now but he still can't get used to being silent whenever your guy is around. There's no other option but to zip his mouth and listen to your sweet talks and nonstop giggling. He gave out a heavy sigh for the nth time as you walk. He actually spent the weekend in his hometown and there are events that happened which he wants to tell you. He has stories about the breathtaking sceneries he saw, the great food he ate, the warm people he met and the unforgettable experiences he had but he can't cut through the conversation to even say a word. He just silently trailed behind the two of you as you go on with the lovey dovey moments, breathing a sigh once more.

It hasn't been a month yet since you started dating the guy but Seungcheol still remembers the day you told him about it, freshly, as if it was just yesterday.

"Then do so." He forced himself to say. "Just don't come crying."

"O-okay..." You are surprised of how cool and uninterested he was. "I'll try."

It may be the idea of having your first boyfriend or the thrill and flutter which got you there but whatever it is, Seungcheol just dislikes the thought of you having a boyfriend.

Simply because it was not him.

He knows that he can do better and he's more fit for the role but he still let you do what you want because he doesn't want to tell you yet. Neither of you is ready for it plus he thought you'll get over that guy after a while and break up but seeing your smile as you walk together scared him. Because what if you eventually fall deeper and never leave the moment?

He saw him intertwine his fingers with yours, it killed him inside. He wants to beat him up for touching you, for even laying a finger on you but he's not in the place to do that. He doesn't have any right too. You glance at him from your shoulder as he press a faint smile. He has to be ready for all of this. Especially because not just a simple skinship may happen next.

***

"Cheol," You kick his chair right across yours but he didn't look back. There's no teacher around but he's acting so serious over a book with his chin on his knuckles.

"What?"

"Um,.. I just forgot to thank you yesterday. Thank you." Not that it's a very urgent matter but it has been your habit to always make sure he knows that he is appreciated. Well, partly is because you want to initiate a conversation. He's just acting indifferent these past few days, honestly not just recently but way before. You can't exactly recall but it started around the time you had a boyfriend. He just suddenly became so distant and difficult like he purposely doesn't want let you in.

"Whatever. Next time ask your lovely boyfriend to do that for you." His voice is so soft it's almost inaudible. His seatmate then stood up to leave his seat and the room so you took the chance to sit next to him. Only to find him sleeping.

"Wow, I really thought you're reading this stupid book." You pull his head to rest on your shoulder because he's struggling in his position. "Did you stay up late for computer games again? Why are you this sleepy?"

You stare at him from your shoulder, scanning his features for good seconds and realizing again that damn, your bestfriend got really beautiful eyes. You always envied him for it. Those pair of orbs that you always look into whenever you converse with him. You can willingly get lost in it and he doesn't even know.

"I'm having a girlfriend soon." He suddenly cut your thoughts with his announcement. His voice is weak and his eyes remains shut.

"You're what?" Oh, how you hate surprises.

"I said I think I'm having a girlfriend soon."

"You think?" You almost push his head out of your shoulder to face him directly. What did he just say?

"Well, she likes me back so it wouldn't take long."

"Why didn't you tell me earlier about this?"

"As if you have the time to listen to me? This is the earliest I could." He spit a very meaningful remark which you couldn't focus into. The news of him having a girlfriend soon still reverberates in your mind.

"Wha—"

"Look, my point is, we might not see each other often so I hope you rely more on your boyfriend instead of me."

"Are we really going over this topic, Seungcheol?" He always points out how you depend on him but ofcourse, he's your bestfriend. You can't possibly just trust a guy you met months ago more than the guy you've spent almost your entire life with.

"He deserves to know more about you, more than how I do. He's the boyfriend, remember? I'm just... the bestfriend." You can't even mutter a word because you don't get what he means by it. It definitely seemed like he's trying to imply something but at the same time just sounds like a usual thing he would say. "You know I can't do certain things for you once I have a girlfriend."

Seungcheol. Girlfriend. Dang words! It sounds so irritating together.

The thought of him dating never came across your mind. There surely are many girls who wants to date him but he never even looked at one once, he's out of it and purely uninterested at anyone so today is really a big revelation that put you to shock. Seungcheol? Having a girlfriend? Unbelievable.

"So this is how it feels." Maybe Seungcheol also felt this suprised before when you told him you'll date.

"Ofcourse not. Mine was—" Heartbreaking. You wouldn't even want to imagine.

"Hey, go back to your seat." Seungcheol's seatmate broke the seriousness between the two of you. "Miss Lee is coming." You take a last glance at him before going back to your seat.

Seungcheol stood and left to the comfort room to fix himself after his nap and you are just dumbstruck at your own seat. Almost frozen, speechless and at the same time, annoyed.

Days, more days, passed after that revelation and Seungcheol just became more out of sight. Somehow it feels like he's purposely detaching himself from you, avoiding you. As if he wants to train you to stand alone without him. Now it's just lunch again and he's nowhere to be found. You're used to eating meals with him because it has always been like that from day one. He never really promised to eat with you ever but you, stuck on the usual routine, like the dumb friend you are, kept on waiting. There's no trace of him anywhere near the cafeteria so maybe he's dealing with his girl but you still wait, he'll probably come soon.

"Hey, babe." Firm hands hug you from behind. You knew it, you turned.

"Choi Seung—" But it wasn't the eyes you want to match yours with. It was your boyfriend. "Oh, sorry." Sometimes Seungcheol jokes around by calling you random endearments and for a moment you wanted to hear him do it again, that is why you blurted his name all of a sudden even though you knew the voice wasn't the voice you're used to.

"Let's eat?" He put his arm over your shoulder, leading you to the cafeteria. You press a smile, looking away from him but as you do your gaze fall unintentionally at the empty room by the hallway. There in it is Seungcheol, talking to a very unfamiliar girl. She's way smaller than him and she's looking at her toes as they talk. You couldn't see her face clearly and you want to so you try hard to recognize her for the seconds you squint your eyes. But then as you are processing her features in your head, like a flash of light, she holds Seungcheol's shoulders, puts her balance on him as she tiptoes and reaches to plant a small kiss on his lips.

You're whole body was just immobilized. You stopped walking, feet trembling. Was that even real?