“Krystal!”

Krystal groaned under her breath and hastened her steps. She went deeper into the aisles and turned sharply at every curve she saw. The path she took wasn’t going towards her bedroom, but she knew the palace better than anyone else; even Luhan. It doesn’t matter where her feet take her, as long as she was able to shake off Kai who was hot on her tail, she would be—

“Krystal Jung.”

The blonde gasped in surprise when she was abruptly spun around by her arm and softly pinned against the brick walls. Kai’s hand slid down from her elbow to her wrist, letting it linger on longer as he locked a strong gaze onto the former. He his lips and leaned closer, noticing Krystal’s pale blue lips. Her face didn’t have much colour and Kai didn’t have to be a doctor to understand that she wasn’t in the best of health.

He brought his hand up and brushed the little strands of hair away from her face. Kai did however, expect her to flinch and move away, but the girl merely shut her eyes sighed deeply.

“When did your migraine come back?”

Krystal fluttered her eyes open and threw him a dark look.

“Shouldn’t you worry more about the girl instead of me,” she scoffed, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear before crossing her arms. “She’s thoroughly unprepared for tomorrow and ah—!”

Kai took her by surprise when he pulled her closer to him; with only a breath apart. Krystal knew that it might’ve seemed like a confident and bold move, but judging from the way Kai’s hand was reluctant to wrap itself around her waist more like he used to, Krystal knew that Kai only did what he did to stop her from proceeding with what she wanted to say.

He wasn’t doing it to assure her of her jealousy; he was doing this to refrain Krystal from talking about Shixun. The hold he had on her, didn’t feel similar to any other times he has held her. Unlike the rest, this time, his grasp lacked firmness. It was as if he has never held onto her before.

Without uttering a single syllable, Krystal took his wrist in her hand to spin him around, shocking him in the process as his back hit the wall instead.

He opened his mouth to protest when Krystal’s hand pushed itself against his left chest, where his heart was supposed to be. Krystal’s eyes bore into him, and Kai’s did the same. A normal beat, was what she felt from beneath her palm.

“Kai, do you love me?”

Kai’s brows furrowed at the sudden question. He blinked and collected his thoughts before he responded, “Of course I love you, we’ve been together for 4 years—”

“Does it matter how long…” Krystal simpered, eyes down-casted as she brought her hand back down to her side. His heartbeat had no change. “It took you long to forget her.”

Kai’s stare faltered for a while—

Ah… Of course.

Kai has spoken of Shixun before but, only descriptions of her. Even when Krystal asked for her name countless times, Kai would never answer her.

“But I did eventually—”

“Did you, really?”

Kai opened his mouth to say something, but even now he was unsure, did he? He started to know who Krystal and Luhan were when he was 15. They both rarely left the Western Wing of the palace, and as a child, Kai has never visited the Western Wing.

He only did when he tendered to be part of the King’s newly introduced Resistance Team. He never understood why the duo chose to stay in the Western Wing until he and Krystal got closer.

You see, Krystal and Luhan don’t share the same mother as their other two younger sisters. After their parents split and the King remarried, Krystal rarely left her room in protest and Luhan would often be busy spending time with the ministers and his personal tutor. The latter never saw any problems with the two being introduced to them as family, but Krystal did. And she was never fond of them even when they often showed they meant no harm.

To her, they were only half siblings; and they’ll stay that way.

Kai bumped into her when he waited for his turn in the trials, training in the Western Garden. And ever since then, Kai would always bring back stories from the Eastern Wing. It was also more happening because that was where most of the palace maids and servant boys would gather and hold small parties for themselves.

And because of his stories, Krystal started to leave her room regularly and even decided to walk towards the Eastern Wing.

From then onwards, after a few years of knowing each other, Krystal tried to push their friendship to the next level. Kai knew and was aware of it, but he didn’t know whether her feelings would be reciprocated.

Now, he wasn’t sure if he accepted her because he wanted to give it a shot— or because he wanted to forget about his first love, whose face still lingered in his memories.

“I— I don’t have feelings for her anymore,” he spouted almost thoughtlessly, “It’s been so long since I saw her.”

“But she’s back, isn’t she?” Krystal heaved a sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose when she felt a real headache coming. “Shixun.”

Kai’s eyes widened, there was no way she could’ve heard of her name from another person.

“She’s exactly like how you described her back then.”

Kai swallowed dryly and sealed his lips. He balled his fists by his sides, there was no response in his head. He looked away in guilt when he realises that he never loved her wholly. He was doing it for himself.

He wanted to fill the emptiness in his own heart, and Krystal was just— there.

When nothing came out of his plump lips, Krystal abruptly wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him down into a kiss. And for the first time in all those 4 years, the princess finally felt pure and genuine hesitance from Kai. Even though it was for a split second, and even if Kai did return her kiss, Krystal knew that Kai was wavering.

But she didn’t pull away from the kiss. Instead, she teased his tongue and on his bottom lip. She felt Kai slowly wrap his arms around her waist, but it was filled with so much reluctance to the point that her tears weren’t able to stop themselves from spilling.

Never once did she flutter her eyes open as she sobbed into the kiss.

She kissed, and kissed, but with every touch of their lips; her heart ached more and more.

“Krystal…” Kai breathed, pulling away first and pushing the princess backwards slightly.

They stayed silent for a while as Kai tried to find the correct words to say to her. Unfortunately, he couldn’t find any to express what he was feeling. The man only pulled her closer and buried his head into her neck, breathing in her scent as he suppressed his guilt and culpability.

“Do I make your heart flutter, Kai.”

Kai wanted to nod, he wanted to say yes, he wanted to assure her that it was love. But— he couldn’t.

“Because you make mine skip a beat every time.”

And once she said that, he lost it. Mimicking her emotions, Kai’s eyes flooded with tears as he apologised profusely.

“I’m sorry Krystal…” He sobbed into the crook of her neck. “I’m so sorry.”

Krystal pulled away and wiped at her own face. She didn’t need to listen to his apologies, all she asked for was for him to love her but— he couldn’t. After all those years of going after him and chasing him, and proving to him that he was the only one she wanted, Kai still couldn’t come through.

“I guess… your feelings for her never left.” Krystal flatly uttered, her face now expressionless. “You were only using me, weren’t you.”

The princess turned her heels and left the place without turni