Jackson just finished the recording for the Return of the Superman when he landed his body on his bed. The recording went well that day. It was not really tiring for him even though many had complained that playing with kids were just like their energy were out of their body. Jackson had so much fun at JaeHyun and HyeSun’s house. The Ahns treated him well and they were very welcoming. Their son, Ahn JaeHee was cute and smart too, making it easy for him to play around with him. Throughout the recording, the staffs and even the Ahn couple kept saying that JaeHee resembled him a lot. Even though he kind of did not agree with it before, he came to a point where he agreed that they really resembled each other when he saw that boy face to face. If he was to bring JaeHee somewhere alone, people must have mistaken him as his son. It reminded him of SHINee’s MinHo and YooGeun from Hello Baby. He watched that show before with his trainee friends back then. He found it absurd but now that it was happening to him, he changed his mind.

            Somehow, thinking of how someone else’s child who resembled him triggered some memories to him. Memories that he wished would not haunt him till these day. He tried hard to forget everything by working hard as a member of GOT7, going here and there to promote himself and his group, showing affection to fans and being someone who was not himself in front of the camera. However, none of that were enough to erase the thing he wished to throw away. Deep inside, he knew there was no way he could forget it. It was the price that he had to pay for doing this to that person. That person from four years ago. Jackson sighed upon the thought of that. He was thinking that he was going to get more stressed that he started thinking of that but luckily one phone call averted his attention. He answered the phone call, seeing the name of the caller was his mom.

            “Mom, how are you? I miss you.” He asked right away, making his mom on the other line to laugh a little. His parent were currently in Hong Kong and it had been a few months since he went back to visit them.

            “I’m fine, son. Nothing serious happened. I miss you too. How was work?” Jackson sighed when she asked that. He hoped that his mom was aware that he did a recording for Return of the Superman. His mom got an Instagram account so there was no way his mom did not know that. His fans were busy updating the news when he logged in just now. He read the comments, in Korean and Chinese and he was sure his mom could see it too.

            “You know I recorded for Return of the Superman, right? It’s a show about babies raised by their father instead of the mother. They said one of the babies’ face resembled me a lot. You know Goo HyeSun? She’s the one in Boys over Flower. You watched it before, right? That baby is her son. The baby’s name is…”

            “JaeHee. I know. I read it on the internet.” Jackson kept silent when his mom cut his sentence with her cold tone. He knew his mom did not like this topic as much as he wanted to avoid it. Sometimes he could not help himself to make his mom realize what he really wants when he brought up such topic.

            “Mom…”

            “When are you going to have a break? Come back home if you have a break, alone.” Jackson sighed in defeat. He failed again. No, he was being coward again by bending to his mom’s will.

            “I don’t know, mom. We are preparing for a new album. I can’t promise you to go back home fast but I’ll be back right after we are given holiday, okay?” He tried to sounds cheerful to his mom but he knew he failed when his mom replied with the same cold tone.

            “Don’t let your feeling get in the way, Jackson. Focus on your career and bring back some good news for us.” He closed his eyes when his mom said the first sentence. How could he block the feeling when it was always there at the back of his head? He wanted his mom to understand but a conversation of that over a phone was not appropriate and he often did not have much opportunity to go back home. If he ever went back home, his mom would keep changing topic or never let him speak up about that topic.

            “Okay, mom. Send my regards to dad. I’m going to rest. Take care of your health.” Jackson hated to do this but he had to end the call before it got worsen. He could hear his mom mumbling something but he did not care anymore. He was scared that if this conversation went further, he would have talk back to his mom, something he did not do for years already. The last time he did was because of that person four years ago.

            “Alright. Rest well. I’m going to hang up.” With that, his mom ended the call. Jackson dropped his phone on the bed and covered his eyes with his right arm. If someone was to sit beside his bed, that person could see a stream of tears on his face. He had reached his limit this time and he could not help but to cry. Somehow, he would start anew and after some point, he would end up crying again and the cycle repeats. Jackson had being living like this for fo