FOURTEENTH RUN

Insecure again, dangerous again
so bad (why?) us, yeah
Enduring more, holding out
so hard (hard), we can’t

The crew was arrived at the bus stop in front of the Jungkook’s school building. No one was talking to each other. They didn’t even look at each other. The members fell deep into their own thought on the journey from Ulsan to Ssangmun District, from KTX ride to the bus ride. Once they arrived, they only bid an awkward goodbye to each other. Jimin didn’t get down from the bus. He continued to go to the bus stop near his house. Jungkook and Hoseok went home in pair. Meanwhile Yoongi and Jin also walked together since their houses on the same direction, but the air between both of them felt weirder.

The only persons who left were Taehyung and Namjoon. They still stood at the bus stop.

“Let’s go home.” Namjoon said first. This situation felt confusing for him. He also didn’t know what would happen to the crew after this short getaway. Each people were exhausted from the serial events, from Jimin’s incident to Yoongi and Jin’s unknown cold war.

“Can I come along with you?”

“What?”

Namjoon turned again after several steps. Taehyung was still standing on his spot. He looked troubled which made Namjoon got soft-heart on him. After what he saw at the dawn, Namjoon couldn’t help but to worry about Taehyung’s strange attitudes, which became clearer. No one saw what Taehyung did as much as Namjoon. From fear of being alone which resulted him interacting more with other people, reluctance to go home, occasionally failure for attending school, up to the nightmare that he didn’t want to share. Namjoon couldn’t figure out what Taehyung hid under his mask. But he didn’t want to know it. Namjoon was afraid if he knew it he would get drag into the mess. It was enough with Jimin’s. Namjoon didn’t have courage to find out more. But he couldn’t simply ignore the boy.

Namjoon sighed before nudged his head to the side. “Fine, let’s walk. I think I need more sleep before go to my part time work. You can stay for a while.”

Taehyung walked to Namjoon’s side. They were walking side by side to Namjoon’s place.

“Have you ever witnessed someone die in front of you?” Taehyung suddenly picked up a conversation after some minutes of walking in silence.

Namjoon tilted his head to glance at the boy.

“I have ever witnessed one.”

Taehyung caught a small rock under his foot that he used it to play several small kicks as he walked. He chuckled a bit as like he recollected the memories. The scene was kind of agonizing. The smile that plastered on his face was somehow heartbreaking.

Namjoon could feel that his inner gut started clutching tight. He didn’t like where this conversation was going.

“My older brother died on me (Let’s stop this talk).” Taehyung and Namjoon said at the same time.

Taehyung stopped talking and stared at Namjoon who looked uncomfortable and flustered at the same time.

His brother? Namjoon recollected the information that he has interrupted. Taehyung never told that he had a brother.

“I’m sorry. Did I burden you? Ah, never mind.”

The sight of Taehyung’s bitter smile made Namjoon got sharp pang of guilt inside heart. He bit his lips to prevent himself said anything more to get himself involved deeper but in the end he lost to it. He saw too much.

“Later. You can tell me again, maybe tomorrow. I’m sorry. Today I just feel like….”

“It’s fine. Nothing important about it.”

Suddenly Namjoon felt bad for stopping the other boy from telling his story when he really needed one at the moment. But, it was just Namjoon thought being a listener in this position was really bloody hell. It made Namjoon felt extremely bad because it affected him in a way. It was like moving out the talker’s burden to the listener. Namjoon thought he had enough for these two days. More revelations, he thought he would lose his sane.

Damn, this thought made him felt guilty again.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

SLAP!

It was happened so quickly before Jungkook could understand the situation. Just a millisecond after his eyes met his mother’s eyes. The hand of hers flew toward his cheek. Jungkook never saw her as raging as this. Her body was trembling from the anger.

“Where were you last night?”

Jungkook didn’t answer it but he knew his lies already discovered.

“Your Hagwon principal called home and said that you’ve been skipping class for a while. Don’t you realize how much money I spent on your education? What actually are you trying to do, Jeon Jungkook?”

Jungkook still didn’t say anything. He knew at time like this nothing he could say to justify his act. So, he let his mother continued her rants, the usual one which Jungkook already familiar with. About future, for better life better pay. Jungkook couldn’t understand why just because he didn’t study or follow her mother’s plan meant that he couldn’t success on his own? Why should he get better life than what his father already provided? Was it even better than from what his father doing? Even Jungkook fed up already, growing up seeing what his father doing. Worked until late night and sometimes also worked on weekends. There was no rest day for him. Was it for better? What better was? Why money became the parameter to measure success?

“Are you making friend with some bad kids now? That’s why you’re acting up. Answer me.”

“If I say something will you ever understand me, Omma?”

Jungkook stared at his mother. As much as he loved his mother he hated it when she told him what to do each time. Forced him to study. Checking on him. It was like he would never h