*SJK’s POV*

I stare at her one last time before going to my car and driving away.

Here in front of me is the girl I love, the girl I’m willing to put my life on hold for but she doesn’t feel like she deserves it. I know she has reservations. I knew that right from the start. She has been betrayed so much by that person she trusted the most that she’s afraid of putting her trust in love again. She has become so scared to get hurt again, to be left again that she has built walls so high around her heart.

I want to tell her I’d fight for her if she wants me to. I want to tell her I’m willing to wait if she tells me to, but I know she wouldn’t let me and I should respect that. I might not fully understand her for not wanting me to love her, but I trust her enough to know that she has her reasons behind her decisions.

Her father’s right. She’s always putting her feelings behind to please others. She’s always too willing to give way to make sure that the people around her don’t get hurt too much. It’s always the feelings of others around her that matter and not hers and this is the only time she’s asking someone, me for the matter, to honor what she feels. I should not rob her this chance of letting her feel what she wants to feel. I shouldn’t pressure her into choosing me just because I love her.

With a deep sigh, I decide to keep my promise to her father. To just give her what she wants instead of what I need. I start the car and drive away, all while trying to fight my emotions. It’s for the best, Joong Ki. It’s for the best, I keep telling myself.

I haven’t even gone far away yet when a stabbing feeling hits me in the chest. I try to ignore it, but it just won’t go away, it just keeps on getting worse. The farther I drive away from her, the more shattered my heart becomes. And then it hits me, No, I can’t do this. I just can’t.

I’m about to reach the curve, when I turn around then head back towards the direction of her house. Screw being honorable, I can’t let her go.

She turns around, shocked that I came back and I speedily storm out of my car, giving myself the chance to be selfish just this once. I take big strides and I reach her in no time. Trying to convince myself that what I’m doing is right, I wrap her in my arms, protectively, possessively.

 “I’m sorry, Hye Kyo,” I say, burying my face into her neck, breathing her in. “I know I promised, but I can’t. I can’t let you go.”

“Joong Ki,” she breathes and I tighten my hold on her, not wanting to let go.

“I tried everything I could to forget you, but I can’t. I still see you everywhere. I tried tiring myself out, I tried very hard to forget. I drank and did everything I could. But I still missed you a lot. I tried to ignore the fact that I was remembering you all the time, but it’s useless. Everything reminds me of you. No matter what I did, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. My heart still longs for you…”

 “Tell me to stay, I don’t want to leave. I can’t. I need you. I’ll wait for you if you want me to. I’ll fight for you. I’ll do everything for you, just don’t make me leave,” I say as tears start falling down my cheeks while I hug her tight against me, my heart pleading for her to accept me, to let me back into her life.

“But Joong Ki…” she says, struggling to break free and I let her.

“Ask me to stay, Hye Kyo. Please,” I plead while a single tear falls down her face.

“I can’t, Joong Ki. That would be unfair to you,” she says, looking down and shaking her head while tears continue to stream down her face. We’re both crying now. “I might not be able to give you what you deserve…”

“Please…”

“I don’t want to hurt you,” she says, looking up to meet my eyes, her face tear-streaked.

“I don’t care,” I honestly say, no longer caring if I get hurt. Heck, she can stab me so many times and I’d still choose to love her. I already felt how painful it is to be away from her and I’d rather tolerate any pain for as long as I get to be with her. I’d rather have my heart be broken by her.

“No, Joong Ki, don’t do this. Don’t do this,” she says as she turns around to walk away from me and I hug her from the back, stopping her.

“I love you, Hye Kyo,” I say and she gasps. “I love you, only you. You have captured my heart since the day I met you and I’m willing to offer it all to you…”

“I love you, I don’t care what happens anymore. I only want to be with you, to stay by your side…” I say, hugging her tighter. “Ask me to stay, Hye Kyo. You don’t have to love me, you don’t have to show me you care for me. Just let me stay by your side and let me love you. Please. That’s all I ask.”

---

*SHK’s POV*

Here I stand outside our house, enveloped in the embrace of someone who’s offering his heart to me, willing to break his own heart for me. He holds me so tight, seeming to convey his emotions through his hold until eventually, he loosens his grip and I pull away from him to cower in a corner, burrowing my head into my hands, my head filled with a hurricane of thoughts. Did I hear it right? Does he really love me?

I know I’ve said earlier that being away from one another ought to be the best thing to do for now, my mind was so fixed on it, but deep inside my heart, I had this nagging feeling that there’s just something not right about it. No matter how hard I try to convince myself that it’s for the best, I still find myself wanting to cling to him. I still find myself wanting him to stop him from leaving.

And the moment he drove away, the moment I felt so scared I thought I lost him forever, that’s when everything hits me. That’s when I realized I want him to stay. That’s when I realized that what I feel for Joong Ki is no longer pretend. That no, I don’t just like him because it’s what the people around us want. My feelings are no longer due to the fact that my father wants me to like him. It was in that moment that I realized that my feelings for him are real. So real.

And then he comes rushing back, holding me in his arms with a grip that says that he doesn’t want to let me go. He confesses to me that he loves me and I find myself wanting to love him, too. To respond to his feelings. To be his. To say yes and just ignore this feeling of being undeserving of him and just let myself be happy.

And just when I thought I would succumb to both of our longings, my fears and doubts come crashing on me again. They come to me like a force. Stopping me. Paralyzing me.

Should I let him in? Am I that brave enough to open my heart again? I ask myself as I continue burrowing my face into my hands, tears involuntarily flowing from my eyes from being so torn. I want to. I really want to, but how?

What if he eventually leaves? What if his feelings change?

But then, Joong Ki is not that kind of person He has always showed how much he cared for me, but I didn’t give it much thought until lately. He has always been genuine to me and I know from the bottom of my heart that he is a good person.

I try to beat my head, urging my doubts to go away, but they just wouldn’t.

Oh, God. This is so frustrating. I want to tell him, yes, let’s give this a try, but I couldn’t get rid of these worries inside my head. They’re always there, robbing me of my courage, consuming me until I find myself retreating.

Being in love makes you vulnerable and that’s what scares me the most. I let myself to be like that back then, and it only left me hurt and broken. I haven’t been myself for months. I found it hard to trust again. I guess, somehow, it traumatized me. When you love, you open your heart, giving someone the opportunity to get inside. Along with that, it also gives that someone the opportunity to mess you up, ruin you, break you. 

Can I do this? Am I ready to have my heart broken once again?

My phone rings in my pocket and I ignore it. Instead, I lift my head, looking up to see him staring at me with a worried expression on his face and ask myself if I’m ready to surrender my heart again but this time, to this person. This person who has made me so happy these past few months. This person who’s offering to love me even though he knows I can’t love him the way he deserves to be loved.

He takes a step towards me, looking pained and concerned. I look back on how he always looked after me, how genuinely he cares about me and a glimmer of courage starts to build up inside me, urging me, pushing me to take a risk and I tell myself to seize it before it goes away.

Stay, Joong Ki. I want to tell him. Stay and never leave.

I wipe my tears and am about to open my mouth when my phone rings again.

Don’t leave, Joong Ki. I’m prepared to say, but the ringing just won’t stop.

I rummage through my pocket without looking, trying to end the call, when I accidentally press ‘answer’ and Min Ji’s voice booms in. I initially want to ignore it and reach out to turn off my phone when the urgency of her voice startles me.

“Miss? Miss Hye Kyo? Miss? Please answer”

“Min Ji, what is it?” I ask, not taking my eyes off Joong Ki while he stands there waiting for me.

“Where are you, Miss? I’ve been trying to call you for an hour, but I couldn’t reach you. Miss…” she says, her voice full of panic.

“Min Ji, slow down. I’m outside the house. What’s wrong?” I ask, something’s not right here. Min Ji is usually calm and she rarely calls me unless it’s an emergency.

“Miss, it’s Chairman Song. He met an accident. He’s at the hospital right now."

---

*SJK’s POV*

I watch as horror creeps into Hye Kyo’s features as she answers her phone. The call ends, but she stands frozen in place, seemingly shocked and I go over to her and shake her gently.

“Hye Kyo, are you alright? What’s wrong?” I worriedly ask and she finally snaps out from her thoughts.

“It’s Appa. They rushed him to the hospital,” she says, her eyes filled with fear. “He got into a car crash.”

“What?” I ask, shocked at what I just heard, but I immediately snap into attention as I see her panicking. I should be strong for her. “Hye Kyo, calm down”

“I need to go there. I need to go to Appa, he needs me,” she blabbers, frantically reaching for her bag, searching for something. “Keys, I need my keys.. I..”

“I’ll drive you,” I say, stopping her and she looks at me with scared eyes.

“No, I can do it.. I can…” her voice is shaking now and so are her hands which have turned ice cold.

“No, I can’t let you drive in that condition,” I say, trying to sound gentle. No way am I letting her drive with her panicking like that. It’s not safe for her. “I’ll take you,” I say, looking at her in the eyes and she finally nods.

I help her get inside the car and place her overnight bag at the back of the car. We are halfway to the hospital when I see her fidgeting with her bracelet, her hands still shaking and I pull over.

“Why did you stop?” she frantically asks. “Why did you…”

“Hye Kyo, calm down,” I say, looking her in the eye.

“Appa needs me now, let’s go. Please…” she pleads, her hands agitatedly and I reach for them, covering them with both of mine.

“Hye Kyo, look at me”

“Joong Ki, please… Appa needs me. I can’t lose him, too,” she says, tears falling down her face. I can sense that she’s really scared and I want to comfort her. She must be really worried and assumed the worst the moment she received the call from Min Ji. After all, she lost her mother to a car accident several years ago, so, hearing news like this immediately brings her into panic. She’s so afraid of losing Chairman Song the way she lost her mother.

“Hye Kyo, look at me,” I say, urgently and she finally meets my gaze. “I promise you I’ll take you there. We’ll get there, but please calm down first,” I say and her eyes fill with tears, threatening to fall. “Take a deep breath, Hye Kyo,” I say and she obeys amid reluctantly.

Her quivering hands are still so cold and quivering and I lean forward to blow on them, soothing them and keeping them warm. “Breathe, Hye Kyo,” I tell her as I continue warming her hands.

We stay like that for about a minute and when I’m finally sure that she has calmed down, I start the car again, and drive towards the hospital with one of my hands holding hers reassuringly.

We arrive at the hospital and are immediately directed to one of the VIP rooms where a doctor explains Chairman Song’s condition to us. Apparently, he just arrived from his business trip and was on his way home when another car, which lost control of its breaks, crashed on them.

The moment the doctor leaves, Hye Kyo makes her way to her father’s bed and holds his hand while I stay back, giving them privacy. Chairman Song is still unconscious, they kept his broken arm on a cast and put a brace on his neck, while some scratches can be noted in various parts of his body including his face. The injuries are not life threatening, the doctor says, but they’re keeping him here for a couple of days to make sure and to run a few tests.

Her shoulders shake a little and I instantly know that she’s crying. I stand straight from where I was previously leaning against the door and approach her,  letting her lean her head against my chest as I rub her back gently, trying to hush her crying. Eventually, her sobs start to fade away and I wipe her tears away with the back of my hand.

“Excuse me, Sir, Ma’am, but we have to run a few tests on the patient first,” the nurses says and I nod, leading a quiet Hye Kyo outside. I find an empty bench and seat her there. For a few minutes, we sit there in silence, with her head bowed down and me stealing glances at her, trying to make sure that she’s okay.

“Hye Kyo,” I say a couple of minutes later, no longer able to take her silence. “Do you need anything?” I ask, but she doesn’t redpond.

“Do you need some water?” I try again, but still no reaction from her. I’m starting to get worried now. “Are you okay?” I quietly ask and just when I think she’s only going to ignore me, she starts shaking her head.

“No,” she says, her voice breaking. “I’m not okay,” she says as she starts crying and I pull her against me. “I shouldn’t have turned my phone off. I should’ve been here earlier.. I should’ve made sure he was okay, but I didn’t. I put my own businesses over him again…”

“It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have let him go to the conference… I should’ve volunteered to go there instead of him… I should’ve..”

“Shh.. Hye Kyo.. It’s not your fault, it was an accident,” I say against her head. I can’t let her blame herself for something inevitable all over again.

“But…”

“Shh.. Hye Kyo. Stop blaming yourself. No one wanted this to happen and we certainly didn’t see this coming..”

“I was so scared. I thought I lost him. I thought it was happening again. I was so scared, Joong Ki. I can’t lose Appa… I can’t” she says in between sobs and my heart breaks for her. She continues crying, the sound of her sobs sending bullets to my chest. Eventually, she calms down and I look down to see her sleeping in my arms, exhausted from all the crying she’s done today.

My mind wanders back to the scenario outside her house earlier, before we knew about what happened to her father. She looked so torn, squatting and crying in front of me, wanting to grant me what I want, but also feeling the need to hold back. Seeing her like that pains me.

I now realize what her father meant when he asked me to stay away for a while to give her space, when he said he wanted to protect her from getting hurt further. Me begging her to take me, to accept me, is pressuring her, urging her to make decisions she’s not yet ready to make. I keep pushing myself to her, wanting to love her without getting anything in return but her acceptance, yet failing to realize that this is also hard for her.

Yes, I was aware that she has reservations, but I did not really honor them, they didn’t stop me. Instead, I still kept pushing through. I was so focused on how much sacrifice I was willing to make that I failed to acknowledge that by asking her to do this, she also has to make her own set of sacrifices. I was so focused on tearing her walls down bit after bit that I kept overlooking that she has her reasons why she built those walls in the first place.

Emotional walls come from a legitimate place. I know that, but still I chose to push through what I wanted.

I was so selfish. I only thought of myself, of how I’d get her to let me love her that I forgot about her, about her fears. What’s worse is that I saw her looking at me, seconds before that call, wanting to say yes to me, wanting to just give in to what I wanted because I was begging her.  She’s again willing to put her feelings aside for others, for me. She’d rather take the lashes than make people around her suffer.

No, I can’t let her do that. I can’t let her make decisions against her will. I can’t ask her to give me a chance when she’s not ready to do that just yet. Especially now that she has her father to think about. I shouldn’t burden her further. I shouldn’t add to the list of things she has to worry about.

Thoughts keep swirling around my mind as I continue to hold her while she sleeps until my phone rings, startling me and wakening Hye Kyo at the same time. I reach for the phone to silence it, but it’s too late, she’s now awake.

“Ugh, Sorry, I didn’t realize I’ve fallen asleep,” she says, rubbing her eyes and I stretch my shoulders. “Oh my. I’m sorry, does your shoulder hurt? Was my head too heavy?” she asks, worrying about me when it should be herself she should be thinking about.

“No, I’m fine. Don’t worry,” I say.

“What time is it?” she asks and groans when I tell her that about an hour has passed. “How’s Appa? Ugh. I can’t believe I fell asleep. I should be looking after him.”

“He’s fine. The nurse came out moments earlier and told me he’s still asleep. Stop beating yourself, you’re tired and…” I say and she breathes in relief.

“That’s good, I think… Oh! You must be starving. I’m really sorry for keeping you this long. Let me treat you for lunch.” This girl never stops worrying about others, I think to myself and her father’s words echo back in my mind.

“Hye Kyo…”

“Ugh. Why do I keep burdening others…”

“Hye Kyo,” I urge her, placing both my hands on her shoulders and she looks at me. “Stop worrying about me, I’m fine, okay? I’m more worried about you. Are you hungry?”

“I don’t think I can eat,” she quietly says and looks down.

“Do you want to see your father?” I ask gently and she nods.

“Okay, let’s check on him them,” I say as I place an arm around her for support. I’m about to lead her towards Chairman Song’s room when a tall figure comes towards us with a serious expression on his face and my mood changes.

“Oppa,” Hye Kyo says beside me, surprised.

“Hye Kyo. I came here as soon as I heard. Are you okay?” he asks as he approaches her and my grip tightens protectively around her shoulders.

“Yes..” she breathes shakily and I know she’s lying. Hae Jin notices my arm and looks at me sternly.  

“I’ll take it from here, man,” he says as he pulls Hye Kyo away from my hold and I let him, not wanting to cause a scene that would only worry her. She doesn’t need another thing to worry about right now when she has a lot going on. 

She looks at me with a torn expression which tugs at my heartstrings. I can see that she doesn’t want to leave me there, but she needs to see her father. Don’t make this hard for her, Joong Ki.

“Take care of yourself, Hye Kyo,” I say to her, not wanting to let her go, but I know that I have to. Right now, the last thing I want to happen is to complicate her life and though it hurts to think about it, I know that the best way I can make this happen is to fulfill my promise to her father to stay away.

Maybe in time we’ll meet again, when things get better, when we’re both stronger to win this fight together. When we’re better for each other. I’ll tell her how, after all the years that have passed, I’m still desperately in love with her and she’ll just give me one of her beautiful smiles, seeming to say that, “Yes, our time is now.”

Maybe during that time, fate will be in our favor. Perhaps, during that time, we’ll get to start a lifetime together. But right now, instances keep pulling us apart, seeming to tell us that it’s not our time yet, we’re still not ready.

Maybe someday, if we were really meant to be, we will find our way back into each other again and continue the story that we once started. Maybe, despite all these things that we’re encountering now, our story will eventually turn out to be beautiful. But for now, I guess this is how things should end. For now, this is how fate works for us.

I watch as Hae Jin takes her away from me, guiding her towards the VIP rooms when she looks back with a wretched expression on her face before he leads her further away from me. I love you, Hye Kyo. That’s why I’m letting you go. 

--- 

I stand in the middle of the patio, staring at my mother’s garden while waiting for the food to be ready. After days of trying to evade her calls, I finally gave in and agreed to join them for dinner at my parents’ house despite wanting to avoid my father. We’re still not in good terms, but I know that I can’t keep avoiding him forever. I might as well face him now, especially now that I’m planning to resign as the person-in-charge of the SGC-SCH partnership.

If I decided to stay away, then I might as well do this thoroughly. I don’t think I can stand by my decision of staying away if I get to bump into her from time to time. I’m not that strong. It will only make me yearn for her more.

Anyway, In Sung and Hyo Jin are still not here and Eomma’s busy in the kitchen, so I decided to visit one of my favorite parts of the house when I was young and stay there while I wait. The patio still looks the same, with the same classic wooden chairs and classy matching decors and overlooking Eomma’s well-loved garden. I used to love hanging out here with my siblings back then and play tag or just sit around pensively and think. This place seemed to make us feel peaceful, well, maybe it’s because of the relaxing vibe Eomma’s garden gives off. If we needed to think, this was always the place we sought first, well, until my sister died and I found another place to think.

Feeling the sense of serenity I used to feel when I hung out here as a kid, I close my eyes and run my fingers over the wooden chair next to me. I sigh and instantly, thoughts of what happened yesterday come barging in my mind. Hae Jin leading Hye Kyo away from me. Hye Kyo, giving me a forlorn expression. Me leaving as soon as they disappeared from my sight and dropping her bags off at her house before going home.  

I know, I have to stand by my decision of letting her go. But it still hurts.

So much.

I found it hard to sleep last night as thoughts of her swarmed my mind and even when I finally did, it was her who filled my dreams. It’s always her in my mind both waking and sleeping hours.

I want her. I need her. I’m craving for her presence. But I should stop myself. I shouldn’t be selfish. I should let her be.

I continue thinking about her; her smile, the sound of her laughter, her scent, her voice; when I hear someone clear his throat behind me and I turn to see my father approaching me, carrying two glasses of alcohol.

“Mind if I join you?” he asks hesitantly and I look at him for a long time, not sure how to react, before I nod.

“Scotch?” he says as he offers me one glass and I take it, surprised and still wondering what he’s doing out here with me. Sure, I often saw him out here having a drink with In Sung from time to time, but never with me. We were never that close. And he wasn’t exactly that much fond of me.

“So, how’s work?” he asks, wanting to break the awkwardness looming in the air.

“It’s fine, Appa. Thank you. The merger’s going well and I think by the end of the quarter, we will finally be able to see the benefits,” I say politely. I’m not used to talking to him outside the office.

“That’s nice to hear,” he says as he takes a sip of his drink and I do the same, gathering the courage to break the news to him.

“There’s something I need to give you,” I say, catching his attention as I take out an envelope from the pocket of my coat and hand it to him. He takes a moment to look at it first before taking it.

“A resignation letter?” he asks, surprised, but not enraged, as soon as he finishes finishing the contents of the letter and I nod.

“I’m sorry. I know I should give this to you at the office, but I figured that since we’re meeting tonight….” I say, getting nervous. I know how professionally my father deals with these kinds of things and me handing my resignation letter when it’s past office hours and we’re not even in the office, is certainly not professional.

“That’s okay, Joong Ki,” he says and I’m surprised at the lack of anger in his reaction. “But, why?”

Why?

“You’re good at what you’re doing,” he says and I’m taken aback. Did I really hear my father compliment me? “The members of the board are really impressed of how the merger’s been progressing so far. I, personally, have been monitoring the developments with regards to the merger and I see that your plans are going out really well. So, why?”

“Thank you, father. But I don’t I am worthy of those compliments especially now that I’m stepping down. I’m sorry. I know that the plans are underway, and there’s probably a lot to do. I have already briefed my team and I assure you they’re capable of putting the visions into motion. If you’re interested, I also did some research and made a list of those who are fit to replace my position and…”

“Joong Ki. That’s not what I mean,” he says, stopping me and I look at him, confused. “I thought this is what you want? I thought you love this job?”

“I do, father.”

“Then why? Is the work too much? Do you need more people in your team? I know I put a lot of pressure on you and…”

“No, Appa,” I say and he stops talking to listen to me. “It’s just that, I don’t think I can continue being professional with this when…”

“Does it have something to do with the engagement?” he asks and I nod, then look down, waiting for the blow that doesn’t come, instead, he sighs. What? “You’re in love with her, aren’t you?”

“Yes...” I say and he looks at me questioningly, seeming to ask ‘so if you love her, then why are you resigning?’

“But I have to stay away. She’s still undecided and I don’t want to complicate her life, especially now with what happened to Chairman Song. She has a lot in her hands and to think about. I don’t want to burden her further,” I say and my father nods, seeming to understand me, which surprises me. We rarely agree on things.

“Ah, I heard about that,” he says, staring straight at the garden. “Is Chairman Song okay now, though?” he asks and I nod. Hours after I left yesterday, Hye Kyo sent me a message telling me that her father woke up. I wanted to call her, or at least to reply to her, but I stopped myself. Stay away, Joong Ki.

“So, this resignation is about her?” he asks and I nod again.

“Yes, father. I’m sorry if I disappointed you again. I know that this is unprofessional and proves how weak I am, but I need to do this. I need to honor my word,” I say and he waves his hand.

“You don’t have to apologize, Joong Ki. I understand,” he says and I turn to him, shocked.

“You do?” I ask, still not believing what I just heard and he nods.

“And I’m not disappointed in you,” he says, taking another sip of his drink before continuing and I stare at him, waiting. “I’m sorry I was so tough, and even unfair to you at times. I’m sorry if I always tell you off. Those times during our previous dinners, I went overboard. I’m sorry,” he says and I blink, confused whether this is all just a dream or if he really is apologizing.

“You know that you were born prematurely, right?” he asks and I nod. Yes, my mother told me that she gave birth to me early, which made me prone to certain illnesses when I was a baby, but where is he going with this? “We didn’t think you’d survive. The doctor told us that there was a possibility that you would die and we were so scared. I was so scared I’d lose you…”

“…But then you pushed through. You fought and you lived. But even then, you were always getting sick. You were so weak that there was never a month when you weren’t sick. And when you were a kid…” he says and I remember all those times that I used to get sick, how I couldn’t join in some games since I always ended up getting injured.

“I thought that we were baby-ing you too much and I worried that you might grow to be weak and too dependent, so I decided to change my ways with you. I thought if I challenged you, then you might want to stand up and prove me wrong. I kept believing that if I start being hard on you, then you might learn how to face your battles on your own, that you would grow to be tough and independent…”

“…But I guess, I got lost along the way. I got too used of treating you that way that I kept forgetting that you are my son. I was so focused on honing you to become strong person that I forgot to also be gentle on you. I forgot to be a father…” he says as his eyes start to become red, while I stand there shocked at his confession. All my life I kept believing that my father didn’t want me, that he regretted having me as a son, when he was only doing this for my own good.

I kept believing that I was nothing to him, when in truth, he was rescuing me from a fate I was doomed to have. Tough love. He does love me, but he just didn’t know how to show it.

“I’m sorry, son,” he says, his voice catching. “You may not believe me, but I do love you. You, your brother, as well as your late sister. I love you three. I’m sorry I wasn’t able to show you. I’m sorry I’ve been a terrible father to you…”

“No, Appa. I get it now. I didn’t know you were doing this for me. I’m sorry, too. I defied you several times and instead of trying to understand, I chose to hate you. I’m sorry, too. I didn’t know..” I say and he meets my eyes. We stare at each other, eye-to-eye, father and son and after a while, he clears his throat.

“Uh, all these years of hanging out with your mother is making me emotional,” he says, shaking his head and I laugh. “I’m not used to this.”

“Yeah, me too,” I say.

“Tough men shouldn’t be seen showing too much emotions,” he says, trying to force out a laugh and out of nowhere I decide to hug him.

“I’m sorry, Appa,” I say, hugging him for what seems to be the first time. I know he’s awkward with these displays of affection, but I hug him anyway. I’m still reveling in the moment, happy to know that indeed, I mean something to my father, when unexpectedly, he pats my back.

After a while, we break the hug. “Cheers?” my father asks and I toast my glass with his.

“Cheers”

“Are you really pushing through with the resignation?” he says after a minute of silence and I nod. “There’s no turning back? Our company needs a good businessman like you, you know,” he says and I smile. It feels so good to hear that coming from him.

“In time, Appa. But for now, I think I need to stay away for a bit, explore new boundaries,” I say and I see him thinking deeply. “I don’t have to leave the company yet, if you don’t want me to. I’m just backing off from handling the merger…”