*SJK’s POV*

I’m on my bathroom floor, clutching my stomach as I throw everything up in the toilet. I called an emergency drinking session with my friends the moment I saw her with Hae Jin. Did they get back together? Did she give him a chance? I couldn’t bear it, the pain was just too much.

My friends worriedly watched me as I downed each shot, drowning myself in alcohol. Have I lost her? Did she already let me go? Was I that easy for her to forget? Questions continued to fill my mind and I downed another shot of soju. I took a shot for each time I felt pain, for every time I remembered how she can never be mine. Needless to say, I was already drunk even before 9pm.

“That’s why I don’t commit in relationships,” I heard Bo Gum say when he thought I was already passed out.

“You don’t commit because you’re a coward,” Hae Young told him and he started to protest. “You’re afraid to love.”

“Love makes you weak, you know. It makes you stupid,” he retorted and I struggled sit straight, startling Kwang Soo who was sitting next to me.

“Yesss… it maakkesshh youu stuuppiidd. Lookk at mee now,” I drunkenly said while they all turned to me. “I cammee upp witth a st-stupid idea of fakiingg ann engagemeeennt, I thoughttt I coouulld doo it.. Tuurnnss outttt I wasss weaaakkk. Soo weaakk. I feellll inttooo myy owwnn traaap. I feelll in looovve.” I reached for another shot of tequila and Kwang Soo stopped me.

“Ya! Stop drinking, you’re already a mess,” he scolded and I laughed at him.

“I’m noooot! Give me that driiinnk!” I demanded.

“No!” he firmly said and I again leaned my head against the table, feeling dizzy.

I woke up an hour later, feeling a bit sober.

“Gwaenchana?” Kwang Soo asked me and I nodded slightly.

“Water, I need water,” I said and Bo Gum handed me one.

“Aish, jinjja. You’re really a beast when it comes to drinking,” Kwang Soo said, looking at me with a disgusted expression. “You’re lucky Jong Suk is still abroad, or else, he would’ve kicked your for monopolizing all the alcohol.”

“Speaking of Jong Suk, does he know about it yet? About the deal?” Chulhwa asked and I tried to shake my head, but it only made me feel dizzy.

“I don’t know. I don’t think so,” I said weakly. He would’ve come and beat me up if he knew about it knowing how close he is to Hye Kyo.

“I really couldn’t believe it man, I really thought it was real,” he said. They were all shocked when I told him the reason why I called for a drinking session.

“Yeah, you guys were so cheesy, it made me want to throw up,” Bo Gum added earning a smack from Kwang Soo.

“But really was it all just a show?” Kwang Soo asked, no longer able to contain his curiosity. I knew he was curious, but he was holding himself back out of respect for me.

“At first, it was,” I said, yes at first I did things to and to make our fathers’ investigators believe that there was something going on between us, but as the weeks went by, I found myself doing things because I wanted to and not because I wanted to keep up with the fake engagement show.

“So, you did fall for her,” he muttered mostly to himself. Yes, I fell for her. And I fell hard.

“That guy is such a jerk to have the nerve to come back. Do you want us to beat him up?” Chulhwa asked and I laughed softly. My friends could be crazy sometimes, but they really do have my back at all times.

“No, he’s not worth it. And besides, Hye Kyo might get hurt if you do that,” I said quietly and the pain in my chest returned.

At about 11pm, Kwang Soo brought me to my condo unit while Chulhwa followed us with my car since I wasn’t sober enough to drive. They asked if I needed them to stay but of course I said no. I told them I could handle myself and they nodded reluctantly, leaving me alone.

A few minutes later, my stomach churned and ached so bad that I had to rush to the bathroom to throw up. And now, here I am, still throwing up and feeling miserable.  Did I really loser her? But she wasn’t really mine, to begin with. Did I just miss my chance of making her love me? Should she have accepted me if I tried harder?

Give her the space that she needs¸I remember Chairman Song ask me. Should I really listen to him? Can I really stay away from her?

I feel my heart crush further with each minute that passes by without seeing her, without hearing from her.

I miss you so much, Hye Kyo. I don't know how to forget you. It’s so hard to be away from you.

--- 

*SHK’s POV*

I laugh at something Hyo Joo said to get rid of the awkwardness hanging in the air. I was grabbing my bag, getting ready to leave when Yezi called, asking everyone for an impromptu get together dinner since Il Jung is back for the weekend. I just said yes when I remembered that Hae Jin was standing in front of me, waiting for me to end the call.

“Uh, Yezi called for an impromptu dinner. Uh, do you want to come?” I asked him, not really wanting him to be there since I don’t want my friends thinking that something’s going on between us, but having no other choice since he offered to fetch me after work and I didn’t want to be rude.

“Sure,” he instantly said, giving me a wide smile while I forced myself to smile in return. Oh boy, you made your bed, Hye Kyo, now lie on it.

Not wanting my friends to get the wrong idea, I immediately sent a message to Lee Jin, informing her of the situation and telling her to tell the others about it, too.

We arrived about 30 minutes after and Hae Jin looked for a place to park the car. A few moments later, he finally found one and parked the car there.

“Let’s go?” he smiled at me and went out of the car. He stood at the side walk, waiting for me to come out while I stare at him.

Joong Ki would have opened the door for me. I unconsciously found myself thinking. Surprised, I shook my head, trying to shake away my unnecessary thoughts with it, and went to join him to enter the restaurant where all my friends were waiting.

“Hye Kyo’s here,” Ji Won announced the moment she caught sight of me and I smiled at everyone as I approached.

“Hye Kyooo!” Ah In, greeted me with a big smile, which then faded away the moment he saw Hae Jin. “Hae Jin,” he regarded him coolly and sat down.

“Oppa!” Hyo Joo greeted him and he smiled back.

“Hello, everyone, sorry for gatecrashing your dinner,” he said politely.

“No worries, any friend of Hye Kyo’s a friend of ours,” Jasper answered him while Ah In gave Jasper a betrayed look. We then took our seats.

Joong Ki would have pulled out a chair for me. I unconsciously thought again. Stop it, Hye Kyo. You’re out with Hae Jin and your friends, now. Stop thinking about Joong Ki.

“So, what did I miss? Where’s the VIP, Il Jung?” I asked, trying to lighten the mood and distract myself from my wandering thoughts.

“Oh, he’s at the wine bar, checking out something. You know how he is,” Soo Jin said when a hand wound itself around my shoulder, surprising me.

“Did I hear you guys say my name?” Il Jung said and I turned to give him a smack. “Ow! That hurt!”

“You surprised me. How are you? Why are you here? When did you get back? We missed you!” I asked, thrilled to see him.

“Whoah, there, Miss. You ask a lot of questions. First of all, I’m good, really good. I think life abroad suits me well. Second, I’m here because my mother sent me to take care of something. Third, I just arrived this morning, but I’ll be leaving again on Monday. Did those answer your queries?” he joked and I rolled my eyes at him while everyone around us laughed. “Where’s Joong Ki?” he asked and everyone went silent. Lee Jin, elbowed him and he was about to protest when she leaned into him.

“They broke up,” she whispered to him and he tensed beside me.

“Sooo, who’s hungry?” Yumi asked, distracting us and shot her a grateful look to which she gave me a smile back.

The meal and the banter continued, and I couldn’t seem but notice that most of my friends are not minding Hae Jin, Ah In especially.

“Did you have to bring him?” Lee Jin leaned in to whisper to me.

“I didn’t have a choice. I didn’t want to be rude,” I whispered back. Stupid car, if it didn’t need to be at the shop for upgrades today, I didn’t have to have say yes when Hae Jin insisted to drive me home.

“So, guys, you have to hear this. I was at the airport, waiting for my luggage when a bunch of school aged kids stood beside me and bragged about who went to the best school and which school has the best standards. Aish, if I know, they only care about graduating from a school abroad to boast their status when they get back,” Il Jung laughed.

“Or they only care about getting a high allowance, or meeting foreign girlfriends, or bragging about how independent they were when they lived abroad. ‘Oh, look at me, I’m cool, I study abroad,’” Jin Goo joked and they both exchanged high fives while everyone else laughed, except Hae Jin who looked tense beside me.

“Or they care about getting the best education so that they could be successful someday and not just look down on others who they don’t even know,” Hae Jin said seriously and everyone exchanged uneasy glances.

Joong Ki wouldn’t have gotten offended. He would’ve thought of an even better comeback. Here we go again, stop it, Hye Kyo. Stop thinking about him.

“We were just joking, man,” Il Jung uneasily said and everyone’s silent for a few seconds.

“Oh, boy. Have you guys heard about the latest attraction in Singapore?” Hyo Joo asked, and I almost breathed a sigh of relief. The tension within the table was almost palpable, I’m glad she came to the rescue. She kept talking about random things and the girls and I started to chime in, trying to distract everyone from what just happened.

So, now, here I am, still trying to laugh though Hyo Joo’s latest joke isn’t really that funny.

“Excuse me,” Hae Jin says, and I turn to look at him, confused as to what’s going on.

“Everything okay?” I ask.

“Yes, I’m just going to the rest room,” he answers and I nod.

“So, I bumped into Joong Ki last night,” Ah In says and everyone turns to look at me.

“No, it’s fine, you can talk about him,” I say, trying to look calm when deep inside I’m shaking at the mention of his name.

“Where did you see him?” Lee Jin asks beside me and I try to act unaffected, but I am actually dying of curiosity, which I don’t really like about myself right now since I’m trying so hard not to think about him.

“At the bar of that new hotel. Well, I didn’t really get to talk to him since they were already heading out when I saw him and his friends, but I could tell that he was really wasted. Kwang Soo and Chulhwa were even assisting him to walk,” he says and I find myself fidgeting with my bracelet.

Joong Ki. I wanted to call him and explain after he saw me with Hae Jin yesterday. He must be taking things wrong, he must be thinking we got back together. I wanted to call him, to tell him that he was wrong, that Hae Jin is nothing more than a friend to me now, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t get myself to do it.

Maybe I should just leave it like that. That way he’ll stay away from me. That way, we can keep our distance from one another.

Did he get drunk to oblivion again? What was he even thinking? He knows how he is when drunk. Who took care of him? Is he okay? Wait, why am I even bothering? I shouldn’t be, right? I shouldn’t… but still..

I know you’re upset, but please take care of yourself, Joong Ki. 

--- 

*SJK’s POV*

I drive my way toward my parents’ house, still feeling a bit weak and nursing a slight headache from last night’s drinking session. I know I shouldn’t have drunk that much but I couldn’t help it, I just had to, if not, the pain won’t stop.

I finally arrive and park my car at the garage before entering the house where my mother is waiting for me.

“Eomma,” I greet her and she hugs me.

“Son, good that you’re finally here. Everyone’s waiting,” she says and leads me towards the dining room where my father and In Sung are already seated.

“Appa,” I bow and greet my father.

“Always late, Joong, Ki,” he says.

“Sorry, I had to take care of something first,” I say, apologizing. I’m used to it, anyway.

“Go take your seat, let’s start dinner. We have to celebrate,” he says, smiling at me and I smile back. Moments like this are rare.

Hyo Jin enters the room and sits next to In Sung while Eomma takes the seat beside me. We start our meal with my father asking questions about business, like he always does. Luckily, they didn’t ask where Hye Kyo is and why she’s not here with me. They don’t know about it yet and my father thinks everything’s going well since the contracts have been signed and everything’s running smoothly with regards to the merger.

We finally finish dinner without any problem and the servers start filling our glasses with wine. Of course he still gives occasional critiques about me from time to time, but I’m used to them now that I choose to ignore them.

“I propose a toast to a successful merger. Finally, Joong Ki managed to score the deal,” my father says, raising his glass while we follow him. “Not that it was that difficult to do with him being engaged to Hye Kyo,” he says and starts to laugh while I clench my fist. “Finally, you did something to benefit our company. The money spent on sending you abroad to study wasn’t such a waste, after all. Cheers!” he adds and Eomma looks at me, concerned, while I feel my temper shooting up.

So, he’s still thinking lowly of me. He still thinks that I’m a disappointment. After all I’ve been through. After all the hard work I invested just to make a good presentation and get the partnership. I thought that by getting it, he would finally come to acknowledge me, that he wouldn’t think so lowly of me. But I was wrong. Nothing could ever sway him from thinking that I’m weak, that I’m not someone he should be proud of.

“And another toast, for the engagement!” In Sung adds and they again click glasses, while I stand there, barely containing my emotions.

“Speaking of engagement, when are you planning to get married?” Eomma asks, looking at me.

“Why don’t we schedule it two months or a month from now? That would give you enough for the preparations,” my father says. Here he goes again telling me what to do. Control yourself, Joong Ki. Calm down.

“And besides, I can’t wait to call Hye Kyo as my daughter-in-law. Finally, someone I can be proud of. Her expertise and achievements can make up for yours,” he adds and I feel something in me snap. I’ve had enough.

“There will be no wedding,” I say and everyone stops from drinking and gapes at me. “The engagement’s off.”

“What do you mean the engagement’s off?!” my father demands. “You can’t cancel the engagement! You can’t do that!”

“Oh wait, not that I was really engaged. It was only a fake engagement,” I say. I