With the help of Seunghyun oppa you both picked out a black turtleneck that helps you hide the burises on your neck. You brought along your iPod and headphones, wanting to keep the vision out of your head. On the way to YG, Seunghyun oppa seems to notice that something was not right with you. He grabbed your hand and squeezed it tightly. 

“You sure you are okay?”, he asked but not turning to face me.

You pondered on how you should answer this question. You had not been okay since the incident. But somehow you always managed to choke out that you are fine since that is what people normally say. 

“Well. If you don’t wanna share anything it is okay. But let me know how I can help okay?”. He continued after a period of silence.

You turned to look at him and nodded your head. How thankful you were to meet friends that truly care. But this issue, is something you got to resolve yourself. Because it involves fighting the monsters in your head. You contemplated going to see the doctor again, taking medicine that seems to life out of you, leaving a dazed robot in its place. You hated taking them, it didn’t seem to help rather it only numbs.

At the studio, you settled into a corner and rest your head on the armrest. You heard loud noises coming from outside and the door opens to a worried looking Jiyong. 

“Hey dear, how are you feeling today? I went to see a doctor so I didn’t wake you up” he said, taking a seat beside me and slowly your arm. You didn’t move away because you were mentally prepared for it and had braced yourself for that moment.

“I am okay, what did the doctor say? Are u okay?” You replied and took his hand in your hand, holding on to it tightly. 

“I have to continue seeing her. I am feeling better now too” he said as he pulls you into a hug. You immediately resist and whispered in his ears that the rest were looking. “Anyway, I want to take a walk. So I am gonna go walk around and you can concentrate on your work okay. I will be back in a while” you said, standing up and patting Jiyong on his head before exiting the studio. The guys went to work immediately as you heard Jiyong giving out instructions and music started playing.

YG building was huge and there were matrix-like lights on the walls even. You were so impressed by it. Walking pass a studio, you peer in to see an empty room with a drum set at the back. You felt the doorknob and surprisingly it opened. You stood there for a while, contemplating if you should be asking permission but decided to go in. The moment you sat at the drum set, you felt a strong urge to play it. There were drum sticks lying around too and you picked them up. You plugged in your headphones and started jamming. Enjoying it throughly and shaking your head to the rhythm. This period gave you some respite to the “monsters” that were in your head.

You hadn’t realise how much time have passed, till you heard a someone knock on the door. You looked at and almost fell off your seat. Mr Yang had been sitting on a chair near the door smiling at you. You regain your composure and immediately bow. “So…sorry. I should have asked for permission. I am so sorry” you said quickly.

He smiled and wave his hands at you. “That’s okay. You are a fantastic drummer. Playing like that and improvising. Even bigbang sober sounds better with your playing….” “Hmmm… EPIK high needed a drum track for one of their songs, you willing to try?”

“Uh… Yes… I don’t mind” you replied quickly and politely.

“Okay. Come with me. But anyway, why are you wearing a turtleneck in here?” He eyed you suspiciously.

“Uhhh. I just… The rest of my clothes haven’t dry yet.” You replied lamely and followed him out of the door.

The recording went amazingly. You were given the freedom by Tablo to play however you wanted and all it took was 3 recording before it was finalize.

“Thanks man!!!” Tablo exclaimed as he fist bump you. As you step out of the recording booth, you noticed the Jiyong and Yongbae was sitting at the studio too.

“What an amazing job you did there!” Jiyong said as he place his arm around my waist possesively. “Dinner?” He turns and look at you as you nodded in response. You felt yourself blush from how close Jiyong was in front of all these people. 

After dinner you turned to Jiyong and asked him if you both could go to the secret beach for a while. He had agreed and asked the rest of the group along. He had panic for a moment when they said they wanted to rest because he was afraid he would hurt me when we were alone. But they had noticed it and agree to go to the secret beach for a while. As you all board the car, the security turned to Jiyong and pulled him aside. You were confused at the action as you saw him talking to then security very seriously before the rest of the Big Bang members went down to talk to the security guard.

“What’s wrong?” You asked as they returned to the car. Jiyong held your hand and reassured you that some group of guys was loitering around the van and had vandalized it by scratching the paint off and puncturing one tyre. But that had been fixed and the police was informed.

“Ohhh” you said. Ignoring the growing unease in your stomach.

“Don’t worry. Let’s go to the beach!” Jiyong said, pulling you into a hug and kissing your forehead reassuringly. You felt increasingly tired and snuggled in his arm, falling asleep.

The car had stopped in the middle of the highway and Jiyong woke you up and informed you that we are going to change cars.

“Why??” you asked, confused. Jiyong frowned in respond, you looked around and the rest of the big bang members were frowning as well. Apparently, someone had tampered with the van brake and it was not functioning normally. Luckily manager hyung noticed it early and we did not got into any trouble. As you climb into the next van, you again felt the same unease in your stomach. 

Perhaps I should leave them. People says that I am a jinx, I never really believed them. But seeing this, seeing at the recent events… maybe I am really jinx……

Your mind immediately settled once you heard the sound of the waves crashing onto the shore and smelled the salty air. Seunghyun and Daesung was now chasing each other, trying to push each other into the ocean. You took a seat on the sand beside Jiyong and buried your feets and hands in the sand.

“Feels good to be out here” Jiyong said.

“Yeah. I love it!” as you smiled at him and he puts his arm around you, letting you snuggle into him.

“Sorry dear. Well.. I guess I haven’t told you this. But after the attack on my dad, I have been pretty paranoid…. The problem fame brings….” He said softly. 

You hugged him tighter and gave him a kiss on his neck. You didn’t have anything to say. You didn’t blame him of course, and you could understand very well how he feels.

From the corner of your eyes, you see manager hyung running hurriedly towards you all. You stood up and pulled Jiyong up, he reacted quickly when he saw how anxious manager hyung looked.

“Quick. Back to the car. NOW” he shouted. Without a word, everyone of you turned and ran towards the car. Seunghyun oppa and Seungri staying behind you both as though they were protecting you both.

“What’s wrong?” Jiyong asked manager hyung once they were in the car. Instead of replying, he quickly drove off and made a phone call to the security requesting for additionally security for the next few days.

“Err… there was a group of man following us. Not sure who they were” he replied anxiously.

The atmosphere in the van tensed up. 

Who were they?! Why are they following us?! Are they the same people that tried to attack Jiyong family? These thoughts filled your head and the uneasy feeling came back again.

After reaching back, there were now additionally securities following us to Jiyong’s house. I was supposed to grab my luggage and then we all were to make our way to the dormitory. They had bought a house to stay together during busy period of activity and since everyone splitting up will result in more security guards needed, they had decided to stay together.

At the dormitory, a few policeman visited us and took the statements of Manager Hyung.

“We have been investigating since that day and we have our suspects” the head policeman said.