Author's note:

I know it's literally taking me years to update. I sincerely apologize. But hope you stick til the end. Love you all! <3

~~~~~

On Valentine's day, I gave Taeyang the tumbler I bought with my best friends.

I slipped a message inside and was shocked when he started reading it out loud.

"You're special to me. Thank you for everything."

I felt myself blush so I looked down and let my hair fall in an effort to hide my face.

But I didn't hear him laugh. He kept silent.

Curious, I looked up only to see him staring at me weirdly.

"What?" I asked while consciously brushing my hair.

"Are you pushing me to friendzone?" he raised an eyebrow.

I couldn't help but laugh.

"Seriously, Kysha. You're not telling me to let you go after giving me this, right?"

I watched him carefully and I knew I had to give him he looked very serious.

"No!"

His eyes were fixed on mine as if he was trying to read my inner thoughts.

He looked scared...

But how did I look like at that moment? I don't know.

I didn't even know what I felt.

After a while, his shoulders relaxed and he breathed out.

"I'm sorry for spoiling the day." He smiled at me and I couldn't deny that it had an effect on me.

My heartbeat sped up a little and my cheeks heated up again.

"It's okay." I answered trying to keep the suddenness of my feelings.

Taeyang still had his thoughts in a whirl as stared at the tumbler blankly.

He was surprised when I held his hand. He looked at our hands then lifted his gaze up to me. I tried to give him a reassuring smile.

"Taeyang, meet me later after school. I have something to tell you."

"Hmm? Can't you tell me now?"

"Not yet. Just meet me later." I told him while trying to contain my emotions, not giving him a clue.

"Okay then." he still couldn't bring out a smile, although he looked calm.

We bid goodbye as we reached my school and he went on to his school.

Booths were up again that day, like that last year. The music was loud and different songs played simultaneously. Then there's the noise coming from the students who were chatting and laughing like there was no tomorrow.

Couples held hands as they walked around, stopping at booths and taking sweet pictures. It was starting to make my head hurt for some reason.

For some reason, yeah right. Who was I kidding?

Jiyong, remember this day? Wait. This isn't right. I shook my head to stop myself.

Why do I suddenlu have to think of him when I was planning to take a leap of faith with Taeyang just a while ago. Yes. That was what I was going to tell Taeyang. That I'm ready to take it to the next step. What I felt earlier with him, I thought I was falling for him somehow.

The way he looked when he misunderstood why I gave him a gift. He looked so vulnerable. It made me realize how much he cared. And at that moment I also realized that I didn't want to ever see him that way again. I wanted to keep him happy because that would make me happy too. Then maybe soon it would turn to be something more meaningful.

But right now, after just a few minutes of being apart, I don't see how that is ever going to be possible. AIGOO MOLLA!

After being frozen in my spot, my feet started moving again. The school campus was really crowded. I wasn't planning on roaming around to surrounded by couples and be reminded about THAT DAY. I was just looking for my bestfriends.

They texted me earlier to meet them as soon as I get here. They wanted to know how it went with Taeyang and how he liked the present. But actually, I don't think he liked it.

I kept looking but I couldn't find them. I almost jumped when my phone vibrated inside my pocket. I took it and saw that CL was calling me.

"Kysha? We're at the jail booth. Hurry up!" she hanged up before I could even say anything.

She sounded excited, or maybe just unnecessarily loud. Because it was really noisy in the background.

But where's the jail booth?

"Get me out of here!!!" I heard someone scream, not so far from where I was. She sounded familiar.

I hurried to where the noise was coming from and then I found a group of students crowding one booth. They were whispering, others were giggling.

I had to push some of them to get through and see what was going on.

"Mia?" I was surprised when I saw her behind bars locked up.

"You!" she pointed at me.

"Me?" I pointed at myself as well, confused.

"You and your stupid friends! Get me out of here!" she protested while trying to shake the fake bars.

"No can do." CL and the girls suddenly appeared. She stuck her tongue at Mia. Mia was so shocked that her eyes almost popped out.

"You volunteered to be there all day, remember?" Bom said.

What? What's happening? Did I come too late? I seem to have missed a lot.

"No I didn't!" Mia shouted again, sounding more frustrated.

"Uh-ah-ah!" Minzy moved her forefinger side to side. "You told your homeroom teacher that someone had to stay inside the booth all day."

"You were supposed to be the ones locked in here!!!" she shouted back, panting in anger.

"Yeah right." Sandara answered back. Then all four of them glared at her.

"What's going on?"

"Oh Kysha! Finally you're here." Bom said then took my hand and pulled me away from the jail booth.

I heard Mia cry out again as we left but Bom didn't even turn around. The girls followed us behind. We entered a cafe booth, found seats and ordered some drinks. But I coudn't help but think of Mia.

"What happened back there?" i finally asked.

"Oh that?" CL said nonchalantly.

"It's a long story. Don't mind her. She'll be fed."

"What?" i don't know why I was suddenly concerned but was she really going to be there all day?

"Shhh.. She'll be fine." Bom patted my shoulder.

"No! Don't you understand? She's my sister!" I didn't know where that came from but I rose from my seat my hand pressed hard on the table.

"Hey, Kysha! Calm down." Sandara

"Why did you do that?"

"Uhm. Let me see, because she's a b*tch?" CL said

"Does that make you any better after doing what you did?" I was so angry that I kept on talking nonsense.

"What is the matter with you?!" CL stood from her seat and now our eyes met at the same level, battling out.

"What's the matter with you!" I shot back.

"Please stop this!" Minzy pleaded.

But I didn't understand why I couldn't stop. There were so many things in my head that it throbbed badly. My heart pumped fast as well. I found myself shouting once again.

"Shut up!"

Everyone stared at me with disbelief.

What has gotten into me?

My feet, at their own accord, jogged out of the cafe and then out of the school gate. I was running and crying. I wanted to be far away from everything, from everyone!

Why am I hurting the people who love me? Why am I like this?

~~~~

Author's POV

Kysha kept on running as if someone was chasing after her. I said 'as if' because she was unaware of it.

There was someone behind her. He chased her, almost losing his breath because Kysha was going very fast.

He was afraid that something might happen to her. No. She didn't want anything to happen to her.

But as if karma was suddenly on to him, a huge truck came into view just when Kysha was about to cross the street.

She wasn't looking. Her vision was blurred because of her tears.

NO! he held his breath and ran as fast as he could.

But he knew he wasn't going to make it. He was too far behind.

He whispered a prayer so quick and full of sincerity. Save her, please. I'd leave her to someone better, I promise. Save her!

Kysha tripped as she was about to cross. She couldn't get up quickly, her head was spinning and she was trying to catch her breath.

The truck was coming quickly, but then the driver saw her in the middle of the road. He immediately stepped on the breaks, almost destroying it.

All she felt was a hard push, not enough to make her fall.

The guy watching from a far felt his heart constrict as finally halted from the run. He had his hands on his knees as he panted and silently thanked God for listening to him. He felt so weak as if half of his soul has already left him.

"Kysha!" Someone shouted from behind him. He turned and saw Taeyang running and looking as exhausted as he was.

Taeyang glared at him as their eyes met. But he continued running to where Kysha was.

That's right, Jiyong. Leave her to him. She deserves someone better. he thought to himself. Before leaving. He whispered, "Goodbye, Kysha."

He turned around and made a turn to the nearest corner to hide himself. He continued walking, just to make sure he wouldn't be seen.

"This would be the last." He told himself.

He remembered his prayer. Save her, please. I'd leave her to someone better, I promise. Save her!

He laughed at himself. He continued to talk to himself in his head.

Jiyong, you've already left her a long time ago. But not really. You just had to be out of her sight, but you never really left her. That is what no one knows. It's our secret. The reason to which, only I know for now. Would she ever understand if I tried to tell her? No. She wouldn't have understood, Jiyong. Because I, myself don't even understand why. Why I have been such a coward all my life? Why I had to be the one to go through all these s in my life? Why someone like me could be loved by someone like her? Why I had to fall in love when I knew I couldn't?

It started raining but he didn't mind. He lifted his head and felt the raindrops cooled his head.

Yes, I am a fool. Leaving her wasn't the biggest mistake I did. It was giving her away to someone. That is the worst thing I did to myself. It was like offering my soul to the devil. Because I feel like hell when I see her with someone else. When I think that someone else is there to hold her, that someone else can make her smile.

It hurts because I know I'm the one for her and I'm certain that she's the one for me. But even if we were meant to be together, we can never be.

Even death won't take this pain away. But might as well be gone from this world than ever see her that way again.

It's time, Jiyong. Say goodbye.

~~

Kysha's POV

"Kysha!" someone called out my name.

But I couldn't get myself to move. My head, it hurts so much.

"Miss! Are you alright?" Someone shook me by my shoulders.

"A-ahh..."

He tried to help me up, but because I felt so weak I fell back to the ground.

Someone bent down to where I sat and held my cheeks between his warm hands.

"T-taeyang?"

His eyes showed emotions beyond any defintion of worry.

"Come here, let me help you."

He took my hand and placed it around his neck. He placed a hand on my waist and successfully got me to my feet.

I heard him apologize someone. Then I heard the truck driving away.

Taeyang ran back to me and surprised me when he suddenly hugged me tightly.

"I thought I was going to lose you." he was sobbing. He planted his head on my neck.

I felt his warm tears as they rolled down my chest. The daze was fading away and I begun to understand what just happened.

I almost got hit by a truck. I almost died. But why didn't I?

"Please, don't ever do that again. I'm here. I'll always be here." he continued to cry, almost crashing me in his hands.

My cheeks became wet with my own tears.

I don't want to see him this way.

I don't want to hurt anyone improtant to me again.

No, not again.

If he's the reason why I'm still here, then I'm willing to live for him. I will learn to love him if he continues to hold me this way. Maybe I would learn to feel the same way as he does. Maybe as long as I'm here, I could be here for him.

Its time to say goodbye. This is a new life.

The one I lived for Jiyong is gone and dead.

This is a new heart. The one that beats for Jiyong has stopped.

Everything's going to change from now on.

I wrapped my hands around Taeyang, which surprised him. He lifted his head to look at me while still embracing me tightly.

"Taeyang, let me love you this way too."

Then I pulled him back to me and embraced him.

That time, I felt my heartbeat against his chest like it was the first time it did so.

Goodbye, Jiyong.