☆10☆ Present: Promise to Believe
Promise to a Star
★ December 24, 2013 ★
"Christmas Eve!" Seuji exclaims with excitement. She puts the tiramisu cake she just baked on the dining table. "It's our second Christmas Eve together, Oppa!"
Junhyung just gives her a sheepish smile. Even after four days together with Seuji, he can get rid of the guilty feeling in his heart; a feeling that he is not the one who deserves to celebrate this happiness with Seuji right now.
He has been trying to find where Jaesoon is ever since he left without any further notice but he can't find his trace as if he just disappeared into another world.
No matter how hard Junhyung tries to act as usual, like the way he always treated Seuji before the accident, he can't.
No matter how deep Junhyung loves Seuji, how loving Seuji keeps calling his name, the one Seuji looks for is not him. It's Jaesoon.
Ironically now Junhyung now how it feels to be Jaesoon, to lose his own identity that he can't claim for in front of the one he loves.
"Oppa doesn't like too sweet cake, right?" Seuji takes the knife to slice the cake. "That's why I made this cake this year. I hope you like it."
"I...," Junhyung stops. How can he tell her that it's not him who doesn't like sweets? It's Jaesoon, not Junhyung.
It has been happening often enough to make Junhyung feels that everything is wrong. Perhaps Jaesoon doesn't expect this to happen as well but even though Seuji doesn't want to care about her own curiosity, that the real Junhyung she is facing now is different from the one she lived with for a whole year, her heart remembers.
Seuji remembers that Junhyung can play piano. She remembers that Junhyung doesn't talk too much when Seuji is with her friends. She remembers that Junhyung always buys the astronomy magazine for her every month. She remembers that Junhyung doesn't laugh too much but his smile is warm and loving.
The one she remembers is Jaesoon.
Junhyung feels his heart is bleeding whenever Seuji does something that refers to Jaesoon yet she keeps calling him as Junhyung.
"Seuji," Junhyung puts down the fork he is holding. "Don't you remember about Jaesoon?"
Junhyung knows he can't let this lie to go on forever. Somehow Seuji will find out about it and it will be more painful for her. Junhyung understands that her life is perfect now but it's nothing more than perfection of lies.
"Jae...soon?" Seuji tilts her head. She remembers that Junhyung often mentioned that name during the first month of their marriage. "Omo... Oppa really likes that name, right?"
"Seuji, he is my twin brother," Junhyung mutters with sadness in his eyes. "The one who doesn't love sweets. The one who loves to play piano. The one who loves astronomy. It's Jaesoon, not me."
"What is it, Oppa?" Seuji laughs nervously and stands up from her seat. "You're talking non sense. Did you drink last night?"
"Do you remember about the accident on our wedding night?" Junhyung continues firmly. "Jaesoon drove us to our new house when our car crashed with a truck."
"What accident?!" Seuji raises her voice unconsciously. Her head aches real bad but she ignores it. "You're daydreaming, Oppa. Our wedding day was flawless!"
"This is ridiculous," Seuji shakes her head and leaves the kitchen. "I'm going to the bedroom."
Junhyung follows her to the bedroom and once he closes the door behind her, he grabs her wrist to make her turn and see him, "Seuji, do you remember the night I proposed to you?"
"Of course I remember," Seuji frowns. "What are we talking about, Junhyung Oppa?"
"Do you remember what did you do after that? Do you remember that you made something to drink in the kitchen and we sat together in the main room?" Junhyung blurts out.
He wants her to remember everything.
He wants her to remember everything.
If they are belong together, then they will be together. If Seuji's heart has changed, Junhyung will accept the fact even though it's breaking his heart.
Jaesoon might be the one who caused the accident but he made his amend to both of them. Junhyung doesn't want to live with Seuji when all she remembers is only Jaesoon.
If the one who Seuji loves now is Jaesoon... then there is nothing Junhyung can do.
"Why do you even ask?" Seuji scoffs with disbelief. "I made a hot chocolate and a hot coff-"
She stops all of a sudden. She made two different types of drink; the hot chocolate was for Junhyung but she can't remember who she made the hot coffee for.
"On our wedding day, I was dancing with you when someone played the piano for us," Junhyung continues, holding back his tears. He feels really hurt inside. "He played our favorite song because you asked him to play it when he walked you to the altar."
Seuji steps backwards with wide eyes. She sits down on her bed, trying to remember the blurry memories in her mind. She doesn't understand why she can't remember who walked her to the altar on the wedding day. She can't remember who played the piano for her that day.
"Do you remember that we went to an amusement park before our wedding day?" Junhyung can't hold back his tears anymore. "I can't take a ride of the roller coaster and someone said that he would accompany you. Do you-"
"Stop it!" Seuji screams, covering her ears with both of her hands. A tear escapes her eyes. "Don't... Don't continue... Please..."
Junhyung clenches his fists. Without thinking twice, he steps closer to Seuji and pins her down to the bed, grabbing both of her wrists tight.
He wipes her tears away with his thumb gently and then leans closer until their lips meet.
Seuji realizes that the kiss is different from the kisses she always had with Junhyung before. Junhyung never kissed her lips before; he always kissed her forehead. It's always Seuji who kissed him.
"Stop...," Seuji pushes Junhyung slightly. "What... What happened between us, Oppa? Why..."
Junhyung straightens his body, looking away from Seuji. He wipes his tears roughly, knowing that somehow Seuji has remembered things slowly.
He walks to the wardrobe and takes out a small jewelry box. There is a necklace with "J" letter as the gold pendant.
Seuji gave both Junhyung and Jaesoon the exactly same necklace with different color on their 23rd birthday. Jaesoon prefered silver color so Seuji gave him one.
"I never wore this necklace because Jaesoon once said to me that he would wear it when he is already married," Junhyung looks at the necklace with sad smile. "I said that I would wait till his wedding day. You know, he was really happy when he received the silver pendant."
Seuji's eyes widen when she sees the gold pendant.
Memories cross her mind realy fast as if she is watching a movie which is played fast forward by someone.
Their first meeting.
Their first Christmas.
Their first New Year.
The pieces of her memories recollect in her mind.
Her wedding day. Her wedding night.
The accident.
Seuji covers as the tears roll down on her cheeks.
She remembers everything.
"What...," Seuji bites her bottom lip. "Why did Jaesoon do all of these? Why..."
It's a rhetorical question. She knows Jaesoon did al of these for both of them. Because she denied his existence. Because he felt guilty.
On top of everything, because Jaesoon loves her.
His gentle kisses on her forehead, his warm hugs, his words of love, his soft smile, his loving embraces; everything he did is only for Seuji.
"Where is he?" Seuji manages to ask a question after minutes of awkward silence between them. "Where is Jaesoon now?"
"I don't know," Junhyung answers honestly. "we don't know. He said that he would leave us alone to live his own life. I tried to find him but he is nowhere to be found."
"He promised me...," Seuji can't stop her tears. "He promised me that he would always be with me..."
Looking at Seuji like this, Junhyung knows for sure that the one she needs is not him but Jaesoon.
"I believe his promise...," Seuji intertwines her fingers and put them near her lips. She prays for Jaesoon this time.
"I believe your promise."
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
Author's Note:
Just wondering... if you are Seuji, which one will you love and hate?
Jaesoon who caused the accident that made the one you loved in coma for a year and lied to you about everything...
or Junhyung, the one you loved from the first time and finally revealed the truth for you?
:)
Jaesoon who caused the accident that made the one you loved in coma for a year and lied to you about everything...
or Junhyung, the one you loved from the first time and finally revealed the truth for you?
:)
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