Desired Reviewer: 2pmvietguh

Title: 4/5
Comments: I like the title "Love Quest". As a reader, it would've caught my attention.

Appearance: 7/10
Comments: It would've been better if you've included Ah-Young, the OC, in the poster, instead of just Jiyong and the other guys. Other than that, great poster!

Forewords: 6/10
Comments: I don't exactly agree with you when you've said nobody reads this part (foreword). Most people do in my opinion, to see what the story contains, things like that. You've only stated Jiyong as the main character. What about minor characters, etc? Even though they are "minor", you should still identify them. Also, you could have written a brief summary or so to let the readers know what to expect from your story.

Plot: 15/20
Comments: These are bits and pieces of my thoughts through out the fan fic:

Ah Young insults Jiyong's voice. Jiyong goes to find her, to beat her up. Gave her a kiss instead? Oh, a temporary girlfriend? Ah Young has to be his temporary girlfriend in order to get rid of his fiance. In order for Jiyong to have Kwon Inc, he has to be married. She has to meet him every single day. Ah Young refuses. Jiyong tempts her saying that she's afraid of him. Etc, etc. Again, out of nowhere, theres Jiyong's mother returning after ten years. You could've done better as to explain Jiyong's characters, childhood, and so on. The gangster of Seoul. Still, why is Ah Young so afraid of him? She seems like a strong girl, speaks her mind, all of those good things. Why is she afraid of him? I honestly don't get it. Just because he's the gangster of Seoul? - OOh, at the movies. Jiyong's so arrogant, seriously. There was a typical scene, some guys come and bother girl main character, main guy character comes to her rescue. Cliche much? Wow, a whole 360 degree change for my opinion on this fan fic. Aww, cute, he tried to defend the tteokbogi.-- Aww, what's up with him threatening her that he will kiss her? Hmm, deep down, he really wants to right?- Wow, stay for the whole Christmas Holiday?-- Oh, so at first Jiyong wanted to use Ah Young. But I have this gut feeling that he'll fall for her, and vice versa. Oh, his reason is that he's sure that she will never like him. But.. .what about him? Is he sure that he won't like her?--
Honestly speaking, at first I wasn't really interested in this fan fic. I thought that it would've been boring. I've quickly changed my mind when it came to chapter nine or so. The plot's getting more interesting.

Originality: 13/15

I haven't really seen any stories with the same plot, so yes, it's an original, except for a very few typical/cliche scenes.

Grammar/Spelling/Vocabulary/Punctuation: 12/25
Comments: There was quite a lot, so I've just picked out some to point out:

“Do you know how many more minutes till the bell rang?” (It should be rung, instead of rang.)

“What take you so long, and you know that you owe me an apologize (apology) right?” (Past tense for "take", so it should've been "took. / It should be "an apology", not apologize.)

You know that my iTouch is with you but you don’t gave it to me?! (Didn't instead of "don't)

“Unnie, did you see GaHo?” I heard JiYong’s voice, (Noona) (For a guy, it would be "noona", not unnie.)

Lack of periods at the end of sentences.

Flow: 4.5/5
Comments: The flow of this story was pretty good. It wasn't too slow or too fast to get into the plot. It didn't drag out, so a very good flow.

Writing Style: 7/10
Comments: Your writing style is good, except for grammar/punctuation mistakes, other than that, it's good.

Other comments: Looking forward for your next update! Hope I'm not being too harsh- Just being honest.

Total: 68.5/100