How many times had Junmyeon thought of suicide? Probably a few times, maybe three. But he knew better and it wouldn't solve anything. He tossed and turned in his bed, Minseok sleeping in the other bed as he forbid Sehun from sharing it with the leader. He sat up, reading the time on the clock. It was around two in the morning. He sat there, rubbing his arm as he watched the clock. After much thought, he got out of bed and silently made his way out of the room. He slowly walked to the kitchen, expecting no one around as he the small kitchen lamp. He took hold of the nearest cup and poured in some water from the small pitcher at the corner. He drank in small gulps, turning off the light and stepping out of the kitchen. As he turned the corner he was stopped by the chest that belonged to no other than Jongin. He froze, cup in both hands in fear that it would fall. Jongin's eyes widened at the sight of the leader, hands reaching and resting at Junmyeon's shoulders.

"Hyung?" He asked, bending his head down a little to meet the older's eyes. Junmyeon nodded slowly, looking up ever so lightly. The younger sighed deeply, lowering his head and resting it on Junmyeon's. 

"I'm sorry hyung. For everything, and I mean it. I'm truly sorry for everything that I've done," he uttered, adjusting so his lips stayed near his forehead, "i love you, a lot." Junmyeon tensed at the words. He's known Jongin since the beginning of his training years. The younger had so many thoughts and doubts about his skills that he regularly visited Junmyeon in his room and asked for pointers. Jongin was also one of his first few friends, who also was proud of befriending Junmyeon that he showed his parents and commented that Junmyeon was his mentor. Jongin was Junmyeon's sunshine most of the days. These words that he just said were sincere, he could sense them. Never had Junmyeon wanted to cry. He had thought Jongin changed and hated him. 

"Hyung, you're crying." He whispered, bringing the older's chin up as he stared down at his eyes. Jongin watched as Junmyeon's shoulders shook, hands holding onto the cup in a tight grasp. He wiped the tears, smiling lightly as he took the cup from the older. Junmyeon instinctively hugged the younger, burying himself into Jongin's shirt. He sniffed a few times, pulling away after he didn't feel tears rolling down his cheeks. 

"I promise to you, I really do love you." He smiled.

Junmyeon smiled for real.

When Minseok woke up, Junmyeon wasn't in bed. He naturally freaked out, getting out of the room as quick as possible. He bumped into Kyungsoo who steadied him with a smile. 

"Don't worry, Junmyeon hyung isn't in any danger. Jongin and him are in my room, resting."

Minseok furrowed his eyebrows but nodded nonetheless, taking from Kyungsoo's voice that Junmyeon was okay.

In bed, Jongin was spooning Junmyeon, listening to his little babbles as he ran his fingers through his hair. Having Junmyeon in his arms felt so real. It felt so great to have the one person he could trust with his life in his arms.

is there anyone who would like to correct my grammar mistakes because honestly, I'm always tired to go back and check them.