chapter one: before the dawn

"close your eyes and close your mind, your road that's covered with veils"   

"Breaking news! Pandora Street's Eunseo officially leaves the group."

The news was spreading fast like fire. From SNS, to search-engines, to televisions and even radios. Some were even spread through mobile phones. People were whispering here and there about one single topic. The same words were leaving their lips.

Yet the truth shall forever be masked.

" this! We lost! That Eunseo really would get it. He's making the company fall berserk!" Youngmin, SM Entertainments well renowned CEO cried out in great frustration as his fist slammed hard on the desk. The staff cringed in terror, still not used to the head CEO's sudden fit of anger.

"H-his evidences were far stronger than ours, s-sir." one female staff member decided to say as she handed out a few paper works to the older man. "He got us with his case of lacking medication treatment, making his anemia way worse. This has been a strong case, add the fact that Eunseo's family is–"

"I don't want to hear any crap about that head!" Youngmin cursed, making the female drop the paper and scury back to her seat. With burning eyes, he eyed three youngsters dressed neatly with heads bowed down. "You three!" he cried out with a booming voice, pointing a rather accussing finger at them. "You three were supposed to convince Eunseo in staying! What the heck happened?!"

"We're sorry." the man, whose body was wrapped in a loose black shirt and denim pants and hazelnut-colored hair was messed purposedly, softly says, head still bowed to avoid eye contact. "We tried, but he refused to listen. Believe us, we–"

"Argh, shut up! Whatever happened had happened and you three are still a part of this fault here!" Youngmin hissed before he exits the room, the staffs trailing close behind him in hopes of calming the head CEO. The doors were shut soon, leaving the three motionless and silent in the pale-blue walled room by themselves.

The scent of faint lemon and air-conditioner was that they can smell.

And it was rather a typical aroma they've grown to.

"I'm sorry you had to hear all of those." the lady with her hair colored golden-brown apologized as she hugged the dark-red headed younger lady beside her. Her arms hugged her tightly, reflecting how sorry she was. "I'm sorry you had to hear him curse. I'm aware you're afraid."

"I got used to it." the red-haired lady softly mumbles. "Don't worry, I'm fine, eonni."

"No you're not." the hazelnut-brown headed male frowned as he held her hand, clasping it tight between his big, cold hands. "You're shaking. Look!"

"I'm fine. I'm fine." she chanted. "Don't worry much about me, okay? I'm a stronger woman you've imagined me to be, Jo."

"Oppa."

"What?"

"You forgot 'oppa', you disrespectful drop of sunshine." he laughs.

Sad eyes met the now twenty-nine year old Hyerin as she dared to look at the younger's eyes. She could see the growing worry and anxiety in the now twenty-seven year old Jonathan and fear in the now twenty-two year old Huiying. Nothing had actually changed since they debuted. They've lived in fear and anxiety, no thanks to Mr. Kim Monster.

Also known as Kim Youngmin, SM Entertainment's renowned head CEO.  Yes, rather a funny nickname the three had bestowed on that merciless guy.

"I'm glad Eunseo-oppa is free." Huiying smiled as she leaned close to Hyerin's chest. She sat in between her older "siblings". Like before, she felt a lot safer around their presence. Despite her age, she would always be seen as their precious and fragile baby Huiying, which kind of annoys her sometimes. "I was really worried sick for him whenever he'd cough up blood during our performances."

"We're all happy that Eunseo's free, aren't we?" Hyering asks, just to be answered by a unison of nods. "That guy... he's luckier than we are."

"Even Kei and Yejun-noona are roaming free now." Jonathan mumbled as he leaned back, eyes up on the ceiling. "Kei's now an actor in Japan and Yejun... well, I don't know where Yejun-noona is now."

"Wherever she is, she's happy there." Hyerin assured. "Remember? She used to tell us her dreams of working under JYP. I suppose she'll pursue that dream of hers, and let's all hope she succeeds, yeah?"

"Way ahead of you." Jonathan winked.

"Ah, you and your undying crush over her." she laughs. "She's got a boyfriend, dummie."

"Leave me and my fantasies alone, noona." Jonathan pouted before he playfully hits Hyerin's shoulder, making the older lady laugh. 

"Sheesh, childish as ever." Hyerin shook her head before she stands up, holding Huiying by the hand and linking the other free arm around Jonathan's. "Come to think of it, you're supposed to be the matured sibling amongst us, aren't you?"

"I'm the smart one." Jonathan whined.

"Hey! That's my title!" Huiying cried with her unconscious cuteness hitting again. The two simply laughed before they ruffled the youngest's red hair, walking down the halls of the company together, off to their usual training room. 

It's them three alone again.

Pandora Street. SM Entertainment's very first co-ed group that launched and garnered extraordinary attention from the public. Debuted around the year 2020, their solo and group trailers had everyone hanging. According to some people, since debut, they radiated a few traits from their seniors. They were as strong as Super Junior, as wonderful and brilliant as Girls' Generation, as fresh as SHINee, as slick as f(x), and more popular than EXO, as sweet and bubbly as Red Velvet, as awaited as SM Rookies.

Of course, since it was their first co-ed group, they received a few responses. That ladies and men weren't supposed to be in one group because "things" might happen. The group iteself proved it wrong though.

Hyerin debuted as the group's leader, being the eldest of course, who is in charge of vocals. Since trainee days, her voice stood out, and a few seniors approved so. Jonathan debuted as an astounding rapper who could enter diss battles with ease. Huiying officially became listed as the group's youngest who is in charge of dance, thanks to her smooth and jaw-dropping moves. It's as if her feet are as light as feathers.

Three more members joined in: Go Eunseo, Shim Kei and Ahn Yejun. The group were popular in no time, and this continued on for years.

But like any other groups, they met problems and difficulties. At around the year 2023, Yejun dropped out of the group out of the blue. SM Entertainment found resolving this issue difficult and soon, simply overlapped with a rumor of another Girls' Generation's member being married and of Sungmin's wife's pregnancy. The public forgot this soon.

2025, Korean-Japanese member Shim Kei files a lawsuit. People say that he reminds them of EXO's Kris due to similar the similar reason he had left with. Again, SM Entertainment disregarded this and eventually lost the case. Again, overlapped by another rumor and scandal, now including Red Velvet's Wendy's plans of leaving the said group.

And now, year 2027, Eunseo had officially left the group and won in the trial court. SM Entertainment had been sued yet is still running with low sales and low everything.

Leaving the three alone.

But does it bother them?

As long as they got each other, possibly not.

"So, let's practice?" Hyerin asks, standing near the speakers with her hands on the cursor, ready to hit play by her siblings' command.

"Hit it!" Huiying cheered as she went in position. With the sudden leave of Eunseo, they need to adjust their choreography once more. Most especially because it's almost their comback. It's their long awaited comeback.

"Now I get it when the seniors said 'do it for the fans'." Jonathan huffed as he stood on his place, arms crossed with a microphone held on his left hand. "Geez, not even Eunseo's leave can stop our up-coming comebacks, huh?"

"It's been almost half a year, of course we've got to have a comeback." Hyerin chuckles as she calmly strutted towards her place. "Besides, you've heard the fans in SNS, right? They're going crazy for our comeback. Have you seen those reaction videos? They were actually screaming their lungs out upon seeing the released trailer."

"Oh! I've saw one! She actually went crazy in Jo-oppa's part. Talk about being the visual." Huiying giggled as she nudged the taller and older male beside her.

"Ah, shush it! Not my fault I've got excellent genes." Jonathan laughs.

"Quit being proud and position!" Hyerin scolded, only to earn hearty laughs from her siblings. As the music flowed and echoed through the room, the three moved swiftly. The bass would drop and they would do the dance break flawlessly. If ever they'd hit a wrong step, the other two would cover it up as if nothing. Surely, they must prepare for their live performances. They have to make it look perfect or else, Mr. Kim Monster's going to burst through the doors shouting bloody murder. All there's left is a pair of horns, a tail and a giant pitchfork and he's officially the King of Hell.

Oh, and paint him bloody red too. That'll do the trick.

No wait, he's already red when furious. Hah.

SM Entertainment's known for lip-syncing, and of course, the three aren't any exception though they are perfectly fine with singing live. Just to be "safe", as Mr. Kim Monster addresses. 

The three, though, sings passionately as they danced. Unlike a few artists who are chained down by the company's orders, they're quite taking it down from Super Junior– renowned bad-assed artists who decide to go their own paths– and are becoming independent frequently. Sure, the CEO's are often furious of this, but hey, they can never stand an angry Hyerin anyway.

If only she's brave enough to stand against Mr. Kim Monster. 

"That was perfect, but we might be able to make it more perfect." Hyerin clapped her hands as she eyes their sweaty reflections. She sees Jonathan heading to the couch and grabbing a cold bottle of water, gulping it down within seconds. Huiying was too lazy to even crawl to a comfortable resting place, so she simply plopped down the floor, panting and chest heaving. Jonathan is much of a good person so she hands his sisters bottles of cold water. 

"Thanks!" Huiying cheered happily as she gulps down hers. Afterwards, she jumps back up and begins spinning around, playing. Hyerin simply sat on the floor, panting heavily as she drank her own share of water. She watched her siblings rest in their own ways as she recalled the days before they debuted.

They got together with SM Rookies and a few more trainees. Some were much more younger than Huiying! It was amazing how young people can be that time. It was astonishing on how many youngsters were dedicated to take the path of music and to be respected singers. 

The three, since they were close to Sooman, were assured a position in debuting. But things took a turn when Youngmin took over. He looked down on the three but Hyerin's fiery personality got them back to their positions. 

Of course, their debut was delayed, due to SM Entertainment prioritizing the cover-ups of idols' rumors and stuff. 

She could see flashbacks of them three suddenly being serious in their decision in life. They danced all night long, composed their own songs, yatta, yatta, yatta.

Heck, they even got some requests from a few entertainments. Cube, YG, JYP, just name it. The three were entitled "The perfect trainees" back then. Alas, as selfish as he can be, Youngmin refused to let them go and one way to do that was to make they debut, pronto.

Of course, the three were blinded by the joy of finally debuting to recognize Youngmin's evilness and selfishness. They did well, along with the other groupmates. They all went well. They supported each other, gave generous love to the fans– even to sasaengs– and pushed through a one-on-one meet-up event, which happened. They weren't afraid of fans and to the public, as seniors taught them that they were once like them. Ordinary people looking up on idols.

They loved their fans dearly.

But did the others see the same way they did?

Of course not.

"Argh, tired to the bones!" Hyerin whined as she plopped down the couch, her black backpack dropping carelessly on the floor. Her siblings were somewhere near to her–  Huiying prioritizing on watching television as she fell on the floor casually and Jonathan being diligent enough to prepare their dinner. But being the eldest she is, she hurries to help the younger. Huiying, on the other hand, refused to lift a finger.

"It's been a wild ride to get to this position, huh, noona?" Jonathan suddenly asks as he brushes his hazelnut-brown colored fringe off of his field of vision. His smile melted his older sister's heart upon seeing it. "How long has it been?"

"We debuted in two-thousand-nineteen, so it's basically...– "

"Eight year?"

"I was still computing!" Hyerin angrily hissed as she hit her brother's shoulder lightly and playfully, just to be answered by a sweet and soft giggle.  "Quit stealing Huiying's title as the 'smart sibling'!"

"Wasn't trying to." Jonathan laughed before he eyes down his sister. Technically, and much to the older's frustration, he managed to grow inches taller than her. Exactly seven inches taller than her. 

Which doesn't really help him be seen as a "younger" brother of Hyerin.

The sound of sizzling meat filled the kitchen and the sweet aroma of cooked veggies soon filled their sense of smell. Jonathan's mind was focused on the meat as he seasoned it carefully and eyed it like a hawk is to it prey. Hyerin, on the other side, was chopping a few vegetables. 

"Jonathan."

"Yes, noona?"

"... I'm sorry."

Jonathan froze in place before he spins his head around to his older sister, a brow raised. "Excuse me?" he blinked.

"I said I'm sorry."

"For?"

"For being a useless leader." Hyerin nervously laughed, which was somewhat a cue to Huiying's entrance, a bowl of dried cherries held by her right hand. 

"Eonnie isn't a useless leader. If anything, you're the best leader there is!" Huiying giggled as she placed the bowl on the kitchen top and wrapped her arms around the older female's waist, acting all cutesy again. "Stop thinking that you're useless or what. You're perfect, eonni."

"But we lost three members. Kim Monster might make our group disband soon too. Our fanclub's dropping." Hyerin frowned.

"Who says it's dropping? If there's anything happening with the Pyxis, they're supporting us 'til the end. You see, I saw a recent post in our fancafe a minute ago, and she said the whole fanclub's with us three." she smiles.

Pyxis. She smiled as she saw Huiying proudly put up a soft and faint smile upon hearing that familiar word. It's their fanclub, which she came about himself five months after they had debuted. Originally, Yejun had suggested their fanclub to be "Pandora Block", which the rest had claimed clichè. Huiying, being the smarty-pants she is, came up with "Pyxis", the Greek translation of "box".

According to legends she had read back at the orphanage, she loved the story of Pandora's Box the most. That's where she got Pyxis. And since the group are somewhat carrying a theme of "Pandora's Box", why not give that name to the fanclub? It sounded pretty fancy too. Greek languaged fanclub? Pretty awesome, isn't it?

"Exactly, noona. Besides, we were the ones who supported the other three to leave so they won't be tortured more." Jonathan says while he cooks the meat. "They left for the best. It wasn't because they hated us, but because the entertainment's too much already. The company's literally strangling them."

"Oppa is right. Don't think of yourself as a terrible leader, okay?" Huiying frowned as she crossed her arms.

"Alright, alright. You two win." Hyerin smiled as she ruffled her sister's hair. "Say, who wants to drop by that sweet cafe around the block tomorrow, hm? My treat!"

"Kim Monster will be upset again if we leave for tomorrow." Huiying pouted.

"Puh-leese. We can just come up with a perfect lie to avoid going there tomorrow." Hyerin blinked before she pinches the youngest's marshmallow-like cheeks. "You're the genius. Go come up with a lie."

"Tell that monster that I caught the flu, passed it to Hyerin-noona and you have to nanny us." Jonathan added. "Just explain anything to him with flying colors and he'd fall for that. Trust me."

"It's your idea, do it yourself!"  Huiying hissed, grabbed her bowl of cherries and scurried back to the living room.

"Hey! Get your back here, young lady!" Jonathan cried, leaving the meat unattended as he chases his younger sister. Hyerin decides to join in their play time, chasing the younger ones as she laughed to her heart's content. Huiying was soon caught, or to be exact, had herself caught.

She tripped on the carpet and fell belly flat, spilling her beloved dried cherries on the probably-clean floor. Jonathan trapped her underneath him and gave him a merciless session of tickle attacks, sending the young lady into a laughing fit. Hyerin decided to act as the loved heroine and wrestled her brother off of the youngest, tickling him herself. 

Soon, the tickling died down and the three were huffing, post-giggles heard.

"'Tis the life, huh?" Jonathan smiled. "Never knew we'd end up this happy still."

"We're family. We're bound to be happy around each other's presence." Huiying giggled. "Remember? Even if we were bullied endlessly back at the orphanage, we still felt happy as long as we're together."

"And little Confucious speaks once more." Hyerin giggles, followed by Jonathan's hearty laughter and a whine from Huiying. She eyes the ceiling as her giggle died down, a grim line replacing her sunny smile. "But you know... it'd be happier if we were really complete."

"... Yeah. The fifteen of us, yeah?" Jonathan sighs.

"I miss them." Huiying breathed out before she pouts.

"Go visit 'em then." Jonathan retorted.

"As if we could."

"... Oh."

Silence filled the dormitory as the three recalled those twelve idiots they once addressed as "dads". To be truthful, they still and will still address them as "dads". They were their fathers and will forever be, right? 

But alas, every lovely tale should come to an end.

And theirs had already ended.

"Year two-thousand-twenty-one." Huiying breathed out, rolling the numbers off of her tongue fluidly yet pain and agony evident as she did. She stared blankly at the ceiling as she mentally read the "notes" stuck in her brain. "It was that year, wasn't it? That dreaded year they went off of their own paths. The year agony had hit almost ninety percent of the public. The year our company's sales actually crashed down.  The year– "

"– EXO disbanded." Jonathan ended up with a heavy sigh.

"I was trying to make it dramatic!" Huiying pouted as she hits her brother's thigh with her foot.

"You're not shooting a drama, sis."

Hyerin was quiet as her younger siblings bickered. It actually pains her as she recalled that dreaded year, as what Huiying had claimed. It's only been two years since they've debuted and EXO had decided to officially break up after nine years of activity. They broke off, left EXO-L's crying and agonized and most of all, the three orphaned once more. Haven't heard of them since then.

"Noona? .... Noona, hello?" 

"What?"

"Weren't you listening?"

"No... maybe not."

"I asked if you're okay. We're sorry we brought the topic up again. We know you're still sensitive over EXO's disbandment– "

"– Dad."

"Huh?"

"It's the dads' disbandment. Not just EXO, but dads."

"R-right. Sorry."

Hyerin rose from her place and suddenly froze in place as she sniffed a particular burning scent. Panic coarsed through her as she recalled the meat and vegetables they left unattended. Literally, they were on fire. The three panicked and helped each other put the growing flame out and when they did, they frowned at their burnt dinner.

"Anybody wants pizza?" Hyerin asks, just to be answered by two hands raising after a nanosecond that question was given. She simply smiles.

They're not entirely orphaned.