Sorry for the late review ;-;

OC- 20/30

Hmm, firstly, this:

‘It would be hard enough if I was only a wolf or only a kitsune but as a mixture of both, I picked up everything...’

That’s pretty cliche. A wolf, fine. A kitsune...meh. I wouldn’t recommend it; it’s pretty out-of-place. And a mixture of both? Sure, it provides a plausible explanation to the twins’ sensitivity but that’s leaning towards a Mary-Sueish character.

Back to kitsunes, it’s even more cliche when you mention that their mother is one of the last in the world, making Sena and her brother even more special.

Speaking of making them more special…

‘Usually, or at least from what I'd been taught in class, kitsune could not control their foxfire unless they were in danger or frightened (of, say, the dark) but I wasn't just a regular kitsune. Neither was my brother. We were hybrids, we were scientific miracles, more so than werewolves or any other creature.’

Nooo. Nooo. This is the ultimate cliche, having them be able to be extremely advanced or special.

‘I rolled my eyes when the girls in the room swooned and the boys stared at him in either jealousy, admiration or both.’

Hmm. Okay. Ari seems a bit cliche, but okay. Popular bad boy type with a soft-ish side and anger problems? Sounds okay, but he’s pretty predictable so far.

I like Sena’s personality so far. Not too gentle and sweet and perfect, and she’s pretty relatable too.

Grammar and Flow- 26/30

You had a few run-on sentences and superfluous words, such as:
‘I always liked this moment right here in the last few minutes of the lunch period at school when I sat up on the roof where there was a sweet little greenhouse with blooming flowers and bright greenery.’

Instead of a lengthy and confusing sentences, you can divide it into parts, remove words and add punctuation, like this:

I always liked this moment in the last few minutes of the lunch period. I would always sit up on the roof, where there was a sweet little greenhouse with blooming flowers and bright greenery.

Also, this one sentence made me kind of crack up.

‘It was one of the reasons my brother and I were so when it came to timekeeping...’

What. What? What?!

Erm...either it’s a hilarious spelling mistake, ‘a**l’ is slang for something else or maybe you don’t know what the word means…?

By the way, I love how you put the timetable in there; it’s a handy visual aid.

Total: 46/60, or 76.67%