Bambam sat on the floor, his back leaned on the door and tears flowing down. He was so hurt.

'It's not about you, It's about me'

Mark's sentences earlier made him confused. What is that? Is it really impossible for them to be friend again? Not because of him, but because Mark himself, is it because Mark doesn't want to be close to him again?

And another tears escaped his bronze eyes and fell down to his knees that he hugged tightly. He rested his head on his knees and continue sobbing. He never knew that losing someone will be this hurt.

A knocked could be heard from the door behind him, made him jolted from his position. He quickly get up and ran to the toilet to wash his messed up face.

He wondered, who will knocked on his door at times like this? Maybe Jackson, because they promised to met at Jackson's place earlier. So he opened the door, and saw Mark standing there, looking apologetic.

"Mark hyung.." that sentence came out from his mouth, a bit shaky and unsure.

"Bambam.." Mark said, step inside the apartment and close the door behind him. He looked at the cute blonde boy in front of him, his nose and eyes red, is he crying?

Suddenly Mark pulled Bambam's wrist and grab on his waist before plant a kiss on the younger's plump lips. He waited till Bambam pushed him, but the younger grab onto Mark's shirt and pulled him closer.

Like all the good thing in the world, the kiss also finally ended with Bambam took a deep breath and looked into the older eyes. They both confused, they didn't understand what just happened. What is that mean?

"I love you." Mark suddenly said, with his hand still on Bambam's waist. The younger looked at him with wide eyes, but a pink blush starting to appear on his round cheeks.

"Maybe it's too sudden right? I don't know too, this makes me confuse. I just know that, I want to be close to you. I want to be with you. And the fact that you're someone's, made me mad and crazy." Mark said, didn't averted his gaze from the younger's bronze eyes.

"Me too." Bambam said, a small smile appeared on his cute face, and that made Mark smiles too. "I  feel the same way. I want to be with you, I couldn't stop thinking about you, and the fact that you are with someone make me sad."

"Then, what should we-" before Bambam finshed his sentence, a knocked on the door could be heard again along with Jackson's voice that asked Bambam to open the door.

The younger suddenly got panicked and pulled Mark into his bedroom. "Wait here. Don't come out until i told you to." He said and close the door, leaving Mark sat on the younger bed alone and confused.

Mark could hear Jackson's voice from there, and he just chuckled. Why he should hide anyway? Why Bambam told him to hide? It's only Jackson, and Jackson already knew everything. He stand up and decided to just came out from the room, before he realized that he's inside Bambam's bedroom.

Think about it again, this is his first time visiting the younger's bedroom, and he actually curious. He could see a drawer, and a clothes hanging nicely on the bar that pasted on the wall across the bed, sorting by color and type. There's shirt, T-shirt, jacket and pants. Under it, there's Bambam's shoes collection and acessories. He was amazed, because how can someone fit all of this into one single suitcase that school provided for them. And they will spend a lot of time at school anyway, they only need uniform.

He got the conclusion that Bambam is a fashionista, but that still fascinating for him. He realized that, when they first met Bambam also has the simple yet chic style, and when they both went to amusement park, Bambam also dressed nicely, with oversized shirt and skinny pants that hugged his skinny legs tightly, made the younger looked so cute yet pretty at the same time.

Mark blushed with his own thoughts, and decided to leave the younger's closet and walked the blonde boy's desk. He saw a picture, Bambam with his families, and Bambam with Yugyeom and Jackson, and the recent one, Bambam with Brian. Suddenly the guilt eat him up, but not for long because he also found the picture of Bambam with him, when they were younger. He smiled a bit and took the picture.

He lied on the younger's bed with the picture on his hand, looking at it, while thinking what would happened if he never left Thailand. What would happened if he never parted with Bambam? Will they keeping their brotherly relationship, or they will move forward to more romantic relationship, like now? Mark remembered that, when they were little, it's true that Bambam was the most precious little brother for him, he will do everything just to make the younger smiles, and it never changed. He realized that he still will do everything to make the younger smile.

*

The talk with Jackson became longer than he expected, expecially since the talk is not at all about him and Mark, but about Jackson himself with Youngje.

Bambam kept looking at the clock and felt bad everytime because Mark at his bedroom, alone. Just right before Jackson decided to went back to his dorm, Yugyeom came home from his basketball hangout, and t