Less than two years ago…

Yonghwa is gripping on the steering wheel tightly.  A few minutes after Seohyun left him on the parking lot, he gripped on the wheel and drove away.  Minutes later, with his knuckles white, he realized that he was parked in front of the building where Shinhye’s condo’s unit is.  The few minutes he was separated from Seohyun, felt like an eternity. And he was not happy about it.

Yonghwa placed his head on the steering feel. He knows that he needs to make a decision and he does not like making it. He does not want to hurt anybody, but not making any decision now would just make things worse. 

He needs a sign.  Yonghwa closed his eyes. I need a sign.  It is now or never, Yonghwa thought.  He went out of the parked car and started to walk towards the building. The doorman greeted him and he smiled feebly. Yonghwa started to walk towards the elevator and pushed the up button. 

Yonghwa knocked on Shinhye’s door. He could’ve just key in the password, but he didn’t choose to. Shinhye opened the door, she was dressed and looks like she was about to leave. “You’re wearing that to the show?” Shinhye asked. Yonghwa was surprised with Shinhye’s question.  “Don’t tell me you forgot. We’ll be attending a fashion show, right? I’m thinking of working with this designer, and this is the best way to see his designs.”

Yonghwa looked at Shinhye. We have been together for more than three years, Yonghwa thought.  Do I really love her? Or do I think I just have to be with her?

Shinhye stood and watched Yonghwa who was staring at her quietly.  “Is there something wrong?”

Yonghwa did not answer. Shinhye continued to ramble on, “By the way, the invitations just got in.  They looked great. We could send it out tomorrow.  The chef is also not getting any better, we need to look for another one tomorrow. I think we should go to Jeollanam-du again to finalize things.” Shinhye turned her back from him and continued to fix herself in front of the mirror.

Jeollanam-du? Invitations? Chef? Is the universe trying to send me a message and I am just to dense to sense it,Yonghwa thought.

Shinhye got her purse from the coffee table near the door. “Why are you just standing there? Let’s go.”

Shinhye started to walk past Yonghwa, but Yonghwa grabbed her arm and made her face him.  Yonghwa then kissed Shinhye. He kissed her hard as if he is trying to find something.

Shinhye pulled away. “You ruined my make-up!” she complained and started to go back to the front of the mirror.

It’s not the same. There were no thunderclaps, no passion,Yonghwa thought, not even love. Was I so blind not to see that all along?

“I’m not going with you Shinhye,” Yonghwa said.

“What?” Shinhye turned and looked at Yonghwa. “What do you mean by you’re not going? You have to. I made reservations for both of us.”

“I’m not going with you Shinhye,” Yonghwa repeated. He walked towards Shinhye and held her shoulders. “I’m calling off the wedding.”

Shinhye stared at him, trying to figure out if he is making a joke.  She looked in his eyes, and she realized that Yonghwa is not joking. “Is this one of your immature tantrums again?”  She brushed Yonghwa’s hand from her shoulders.  “Oppa if you are having cold feet, that’s natural.”

“It’s not cold feet,” said Yonghwa. “Tell me, if I asked you not to do any drama or movie, would you listen to me?”

“That’s silly Oppa,” Shinhye answered. “I need to do it, I'm an actress.”

“I always tried to make way for what you want, Shinhye,” Yonghwa answered sadly. “But you never met me halfway. You did not even try to get into my life. Cause you think that where I need to be is in your life.”

Shinhye’s eyes are now starting to get red.  “Is it why you are like this? You just want to get your way?”

Yonghwa shook his head. “It should never be just your way, or my way. It should be ours. But you never get to see that, do you?”

Shinhye sat down and started to cry. “I knew, four months ago, when we met in Jeollanam-du. I knew you were different. I can’t place my finger on it, but I knew you changed.”

Yonghwa sat beside Shinhye, “I found myself.”

Shinhye started to cry. “And I wasn’t there with you?”

Yonghwa looked at Shinhye and held her hand. “You would always be great in my memory, Shinhye. But what we had, what we will have, if we continue the wedding, would not be as great.” 

“Is there somebody else,” asked Shinhye.

Yonghwa did not answer but l