Chapter 5 Somewhere out there is my heart - after Etude House through January 2012

My Heart's Desire

A/N: Please bear with me – I need to do a bit of summarizing in chapters 5 and 6 before the year 2013…

The two antagonists didn’t interact after their Etude House commercial contract ended.  They didn’t acknowledge each other at events or award shows so the memory of fleeting kisses and feather touches faded away to be replaced by other sensations and emotions gathered from different directions and sources.  The memories faded and were filed away in the back recesses of their minds. 

Although both were busy following their own path to stardom and fame their paths crossed whether they realized it or not.  It was small things that brought a fleeting smile from a memory that didn’t quite register.  Like the time Min Ho was rehearsing for a commercial shoot at a department store and he glanced over to see a full size poster of a girl holding a bottle of facial wash.  It was the eyes he saw when he looked over at the poster.  Those eyes were familiar – the most mesmerizing female eyes in the world.  But those beautiful eyes came with the most irritating woman in the world.  He sneered at the poster thinking, “Go away you annoying opinionated beautiful face.”  And he promptly forgot the eyes and thoughts he just experienced. 

The year was busy but two things happened in the world of Min Ho and Alice Park.  His detective agency found a small clue to go with the hospital receipt Min Ho had found in the records room box.  The receipt was for a small clinic located in Busan.  A woman had been treated for a fall during December 1989.  The fall was insignificant but the notation that she was 7 months pregnant was interesting.  Was this Park connected to the elusive Alice Park?  He asked the agency to explore this line more thoroughly.  So she would have delivered a baby in 1990?

Shin Hye was involved in her college work.  She was able to pass the core work requirements through testing.  It was work she had already completed as Alice Park and she was intelligent but did not want to be known as Shin Hye the smart girl.  She wanted normalcy during her college years in Korea.  She selected different majors because every bit of knowledge was important. Juggling places and times was hectic but thankfully she had no appearances scheduled as Alice Park.  Uncle made sure no pictures of Alice Park existed but should one ever surface there would be a similarity to Park Shin Hye but so different that no one would think they were the same girl.  It was amazing the difference to be achieved with simple make-up, clothing, wigs and most importantly a powerful figure pulling the strings in the background.

She had discovered a small clue she thought might be promising.  She had written a computer program and disguised it as a line in an operating system for one of the world’s largest internet providers.  It had taken her 2 years to perfect this small computer worm and she had carefully put it out there to see if she might inadvertently catch something.  She did and she was rather puzzled by the information but she would delve deeper before she considered how this tiny piece of information might effect the end results in her search for her father.

Shin Hye was in Japan with Sukkie for their first ‘He’s Beautiful’ fan meeting in June.  She was amazed that the fan meeting sold out in the first 6 minutes.  She felt pressure that she might not do enough to please the show’s fans.  But she didn’t dwell on it because her Sukkie was there and they worked well together. 

Min Ho was in Japan briefly the day before the ‘You’re Beautiful’ or ‘He’s Beautiful’ fan meeting.  He saw billboards and posters everywhere for the fan meet show.  He noticed the life-size photos of a boyish girl with huge eyes and a beautiful smile.  Hummpfff he thought.  Who cares about the posters showing the actress with that ‘Sukkie’ guy and his arm around dumb girl’s shoulder?  Her problem - not mine – I warned her already.

He attended awards shows, did interviews, did commercial shoots and practiced singing. 

She attended awards shows, did interviews, did commercial shoots and practiced for the upcoming October A.N. Show in Taipei.

He read her interviews and scoffed at the little girl’s attempt to be grown-up.

She read his interviews and rolled her eyes at his innuendoes and dorkiness

Awards were won and they were humbled and grateful.  It was a great year and many wonderful things happened in their careers but neither could ever place a finger on what it was they felt they were lacking.  How odd they both thought.

The year 2011 would be a tremendous year full of success and heartbreak for both. 

During the year 2011 Shin Hye was so busy doing commercial films she wondered how she had time for anything else.  She had such a blast filming her Codes Combine Haiker and Garden 5 commercials because Sukkie made it fun.  Shin Hye’s agency was in talks for a drama titled ‘You’ve Fallen for Me’ with her best friend and co-star from YAB, Yong Hwa.  She understood Netizens had been pushing for a drama so Shin Woo and Go Mi-nyu/Mi-nam could have a happy ending.  She was excited to film with Yong because they had a comfortable chemistry together.  It was also a time of anxiety because the fans of Yong and Seo Hyun were quite angry with her.  They eventually blamed her for him leaving the ‘We Got Married’ show.  At first it was scary especially when she got so much hate mail but decided to try to ignore everything and just concentrate on the drama.  All she can do is tell the truth that she is best friends with Yong and nothing more.  She had songs to learn and record so she didn’t have time to spend worrying about whether or not she was being bashed for imagined sins.  She found out there was an added bonus to this drama.  Her friend and Yong’s CNBlue band mate, Min Hyuk landed the role as one of the drama’s Stupid band mates.  Oh Won Bin was the guitarist for the band Stupid plus he would sing one of the OST for the drama.  She had become friends with him during the filming of He’s Beautiful plus he was a former member of one of her favorite bands, FTIsland.  Hongstar, she thought, where are you, Hongstar?  I need to talk to you.  Song Se Hyun was the last member of the Stupid and another FTIsland band member.  She was surrounded with friends.  So she refused to feel bad about any issues with shipping fans.

On March 1st Shin Hye appeared on the variety show ‘Win Win’ as a surprise special guest when Joo Sang Wook was the guest.

Min Ho was flipping through the channels trying to relax when he saw little girl was listed as a surprise special guest because Joo Sang Wook was the guest.  The hosts were encouraging Shin Hye and Sang Wook to reminiscence about their time together on Kimcheed Radish Cubes, specifically the kiss scene.  For crying out loud little girl he is too old for you.  He is 11 years your senior - too old.  Why would you be flirting with him on the show?  Aren’t you embarrassed and why is he touching you?  That’s right it wasn’t a kiss and what does Joo Sang sunbae mean it was a proper kiss?  And why are the MCs agreeing with him?  What’s with all the touching – people are watching this show.  Geez, again little girl, I don’t care who you touch but can’t you see it is encouraging people to want to touch you?  Daddy Long Legs?  Little girl you go too far but do what you want because I don’t care, not one bit.

He was busy preparing for his new drama, City Hunter. 

She was busy preparing for her new drama, You’ve Fallen for Me.  She liked the English title of Heartstrings best. 

He was body building and taking martial arts training.  His new drama would involve lots of physical involvement and he would be doing most of his own stunts.  He was excited about this film.  He found his popularity was climbing and his dreams were finally coming together

She began taking accelerated gayageum lessons.  The gayageum made Shin Hye feel humble when she played.  She liked to remember how much history was behind this one simple instrument.  She thought the beautiful sounds could very well represent a traditional Korea.

Shin Hye and Yong Hwa found out that because of their overseas fan base from their YAB days, the broadcasting rights to ‘You’ve Fallen for Me or English title ‘Heartstrings’ were pre-sold to eight countries before it was broadcast in Korea.  Shin Hye was grateful to their fan base and told Yong it was because of his awesomeness it was pre-sold to many countries including Japan, China, Hong Kong, the Philippines and North America.  She felt so small and humble when she heard about their fan base and read the list of countries to which the drama had been pre-sold.

He had an argument with his father the day before filming started for City Hunter.  His father was on the phone talking to the mystery girl.  He heard him say, “Alice my dear, you have to realize that the day you must assume control of the business is fast approaching.  Which career will you choose?  Your legacy is not in your current field but in the field I have been grooming you to pursue.  You must think of duty first.  Yes my dear girl, I do understand.  I have a son who is pursuing the same dream you are but that is not important in this conversation.  You are the first heir and I have carefully kept you protected by hiding you away.  Soon you will be introduced to the world as the successor and then what?  Will you be able to fulfill your father’s destiny? His dreams?  I hope so, my dear girl, I hope so.”

He walked into his father’s office just as he hung up the phone.  “So Father is that the elusive Alice? Again you are talking to her of succession.  What gives Father?  Are you selling brother and me out?  Or are you up to something far more sinister?”

“Min Ho, mind your own business.  What I am doing has little to do with you.  I allow you to continue in this fake world you live in and yet you question me?  Why do you care what happens to this business?  You have said time and again you do not wish to succeed me.  So I will choose my successor.  I will choose carefully and you will stay out of it.  Alice is another matter.  You will not approach or harm her.  She is an innocent in this whole scheme and I am her protector.  I will allow no harm to befall her.  She is not like most women.  She is an innocent in this world and the type of woman to be protected, not thrown to the wolves.  I will not allow you to meet her until I have decided whether she fits the requirements or not.  Now leave.”

“Really Father?  You will not allow me to harm her?  To speak to her?  To destroy her?  Think again Father, think again.”

He sent a message to the detective agency that he suspected the elusive Alice Park was in the entertainment field.  His instructions were to cross match and search for any similarities between what little they knew of Alice Park and any and all female entertainers.  They were to inform him of the slightest match.  So, Ms. Park, you are in the same field as me?  This search should be entertaining at least.

Min Ho’s new drama began airing May 25th.  Shin Hye wasn’t watching the drama.  It just happened to be on the channel she didn’t mean to switch to.  It just happened to stay on that channel – she was too lazy to change the channel.  She was too lazy to turn away and not watch.

May 26 was a beautiful day.  She was attending the 47th Baeksang Arts Award Show and so was Yong.  They would present an award together and would sit together.  Yong was so much fun and so in tune to her thoughts that they didn’t have to talk much to communicate.  She needed to be careful though, since she was still the target of his shipping fans.  She felt bad because they were worried about something that didn’t exist.

She was absolutely speechless when Yong presented her with a bouquet of flowers for her win in the popularity category. He blushed so cutely.  He had promised her during the filming of ‘YAB’ that one day when she won an award he would present her with flowers.  He asked her if any idol or star had ever presented an actress with flowers during an award show.  She laughingly told him no she was sure that had never happened.  He grinned his signature mischievous smile - that should have been her clue - he said, “Just wait Mi-nam, just wait.”  And surprise her he did.  She had to admit it was a magical night spent with a favorite friend. 

Min Ho witnessed the flower bouquet from the idol star to the little girl starlet.  “Pffhhhtttzzz,” he said out loud to no one in particular.  “Who doesn’t like her?  Perhaps me?”  He grinned smugly at his disclosure to the amusement of several crew members.  He scowled at them and they went back to work.  He was ready to leave this venue, awards show or no.  He didn’t like her hair because it seemed she was too flirty – must be her new style.  Stupid little girl.

His filming for City Hunter was intense.  He was involved in a slight car accident during the car chase scene.  He was taken to the hospital as a safety precaution but he wasn’t hurt.  He was shocked when it happened.  Flashbacks from many years ago plagued him for days.  But gradually it faded.  He had other distractions while filming.  And life was good.

Shin Hye and the cast members of ‘The Stupid’ were happily singing an impromptu concert for the cast.  She didn’t see any cameras filming so they could all be as carefree as they wished without it coming back to haunt her later.  Woo Ri had her laptop and was checking the entertainment news sites.  She had been debating changing her name back to her given name, Kim Yoon Hye, because of all the problems she discovered when trying to search her online profile.  Shin Hye was taking a drink of water while taking a break. Woo Ri was talking about how lucky he was that he wasn’t injured badly.  Shin Hye wasn’t sure who she was referring to so she asked.

Woo Ri said, “Mr. y, who else?  Lee Min Ho was in a car accident while filming his drama today.  So far word is he is ok.”

Shin Hye sat down rather abruptly.  “Shin Hye is something wrong?”

“Nothing Woo Ri, I am just a little tired is all.  Excuse me while I go to the dressing room.  I smudged my make-up earlier.”

Shin Hye went to her dressing room and shut the door.  She sank down onto the chair.  She didn’t know why she felt like crying.  Why should she feel like crying all of a sudden?  She wiped her eyes and touched up her make-up.  Shin Hye thought she certainly had been emotional today.  She took a deep cleansing breath and then let it out.  Now, she thought, back to work.

Her new drama began airing June 29th.  His crew had the TV tuned to MBC in the break room.  Some of the girls in the crew were gushing about the guys in the drama group ‘The Stupid’.  He heard Yong Hwa, Min Hyuk, Oh Won Bin and Se Hyun not once but at least a hundred times.  One of the crew mentioned how gorgeous Shin Hye was and how well she could sing.  They were all talking about her ability to play the gayageum.  It seems she is some sort of musical genius to listen to his crew.  How irritating that I have to listen to them blather about the little girl.  He looked at the screen and she is playing in a competition against the CNBlue guy – whatever his name is – and he smirked at that thought – she made chills run down his spine.  One of the crew said, “How mesmerizing Shin Hye is – she is one of those women that you just have to watch if she is around you.”  He heard a lot of yeahs.  Right, he thought, she commands attention.  What on earth do I mean by that?  No she doesn’t command my attention.  I don’t like little girls.  He walked out of the room.

He overslept July 19th and was rushing to get out the door when he overheard his Eomma say something about the little girl.  He stopped in the doorway of the kitchen and asked if he could have a cup of coffee.  He said, “Who were you talking about Eomma?”

“Oh, Park Shin Hye.  It seems she was in a horrible car accident last night and is hospitalized.  The newscaster said she was very lucky to have survived.  Everyone had seatbelts on so there were minimal injuries.  Remember this, Min Ho, always wear your seatbelt.  I wonder if this will affect her drama?  I hope not because I am looking forward to Shin Woo ending up with Go Minam finally.”

Min Ho sat at the table and sipped his coffee.  He didn’t really hear what his Eomma was rattling about.  He was having flashbacks of pouty lips and large liquid eyes.  He shook his head because he couldn’t be feeling like that – he was thinking, “I hope you are alright little girl.”

His drama and her drama had been in competition against each other for weeks.  He should have felt like gloating over his ratings compared to hers but for some reason he didn’t.  He just thought better luck next time little girl.

His life took an unexpected turn when he began a relationship with his City Hunter co-star.  He wasn’t sure if this was what he wanted but if he didn’t give it a chance he would never know if it was the right decision or not.  Something that bothered him – a thought somewhere in the back of his mind he was thinking a man shouldn’t have to decide if the feelings are there or not.  He should just know.

He wasn’t sure how it started out but they were sort of thrown together during the filming of City Hunter.  She was a nice girl and he had known her for a long time.  They had a total of 2 dates and talked a total of 6 times on the phone.  Then Dispatch caught them and it was all over the news.  He tried to make the best of it by smiling a lot and not saying anything.  They didn’t have an agreement about dating or a relationship.  They were in the first stages of getting to know about each other. There really wasn’t much to catch on film because it was 2 dates – one at a café and one at a bar.  Then before he knew it her agency was saying they were in a relationship and he didn’t want to say anything to make it sound bad on her.  Agencies were such idiots at times and they often agree or deny without knowing what is really going on.  The fans were going crazy about it too. Some liked it and most didn’t.  He didn’t feel enough to say anything.  Perhaps he should have said something but if his heart wasn’t in it how could he fight for it?  So he just kept quiet even after they stopped seeing each other or speaking to each other.  If he said anything it might sound like he was blaming her or saying something against her so he kept quiet while their agencies contradicted each other in the media. 

Shin Hye was browsing social media sites watching fan videos of the filming of ‘You’ve Fallen for Me’.  She was laughing so hard at some of the behind the scenes videos of Yong and Min Hyuk that she was doubled over.  They were sometimes like young children and she loved it.  She had loved every moment of filming with her friends and hated for it to end, especially the way it ended.  She felt responsible for episode 16 being canceled.  She hated that it was her fault. The producer had hugged her and told her things happen in life that are not expected and the true merit of an actor is if they can roll with those punches and keep going.  So she wrote those words in her diary to remember to keep rolling with the unexpected.

She switched over to one of Korea’s premiere gossip columns.  She loved to browse those sites especially to see if she were mentioned.  She often told Sukkie she wouldn’t know what scandal she was involved in if it weren’t for the media.  Sukkie loved it when their names were linked because he could use her as an excuse to avoid certain women.  Oh Sukkie, she thought, you are a scamp!  She was happily browsing through different tidbits when she saw Min Ho’s name.  The headlines were something along the lines of Min Ho’s female fans disappointed along with Lee Min Ho confirms he is in a relationship with City Hunter co-star, Park Min Young.  There were pictures of them together at a bar.  She closed the site and turned off her laptop.  She didn’t seem to feel well.  She stayed in bed for a day because she had come down with something and it was several days before she felt like facing the world again. 

The year was winding down and Shin Hye had accepted 2 offers to co-host.  She was excited to be one of the 3 co-host for the Hallyu Dream Concert with 2PMs Taecyeon and Shinee’s Minho.  The only words she could think of to describe her excitement for the evening was DAEBAK!!!  She was so busy changing outfits, doing sketches, introducing, interviewing and generally having a blast.  Taecyeon and Minho were the nicest guys.  They were helpful and sweet.  She was introduced to many idols that night and with her true spirit of making friends she made many lasting friendships.

She talked backstage to Seo In Guk.  They made a wish to act in a drama together someday.  He was a nice guy.

Between acts, Taecyeon kept her entertained.  He was a really funny guy.  And she laughed so hard at some of his antics that she had to fan herself so she wouldn’t be red faced when they were live again.  She really liked interacting with him. 

The talent she saw that night was just unbelievably wonderful.  It was no wonder she loved this business.  Too bad Uncle wanted her to leave and follow her Father’s heritage.  She just wasn’t sure how to deal with the feelings that came with thinking of her Father’s heritage to Korea.

She blushed when she met Se7en backstage.  She wouldn’t have except he whispered in her ear and she blushed.  Taecyeon tried to get her to tell what he said but she just shook her head.  Minho started laughing and told him that Se7en belonged to an exclusive club.  Taecyeon asked Shin Hye did it have to do with kissing?  So she smacked his arm and Minho said, “Friend zoned! Ouch!!”  Those guys!  What is she going to do with them?  They made her experience at the concert special.

GD threw her a kiss before he went on stage.  They had been friends for a long time now and all her guy friends treated her like their little sister. 

She got a lot of grief from Taecyeon when she wouldn’t sing but she couldn’t even speak the moment the mike was shoved in front of her face so she certainly couldn’t sing!  It was so unexpected.  So Taecyeon covered for her and said she owed him big time.  He is such a cheeky guy.  The concert ended well and she had so much fun!

Min Ho didn’t attend the concert.  He wasn’t a singer and even though he sang for fan meets he had no desire to perform at that type of venue.  His Eomma was watching the live broadcast and he caught bits and pieces of the concert.  Little girl was quite animated and flirty.  He thought she went overboard with Taecyeon.  But then she always went overboard.  Did she have any friends that were girls?

The second award show she signed to co-MC was the Melon Music Awards.  She would co-host with Super Junior’s Leeteuk and B2ST’s Yoon Doo-joon.  The producers told them they were selected because of their influence in spreading the Hallyu fever.  It was scheduled for November 24th - almost the end of the year.  She had rehearsed for the opening number.  She was excited and scared because she would be performing the opening number.  She had to learn to play the bass guitar.  She already had the other instruments down pat but she was still nervous.  A lot of musicians would be watching her and she didn’t want to mess up. 

The producers chose her dance song.  They asked her for her contribution to the selection and she listed 3 songs she particularly felt would show a different side to her dance abilities.  She liked their choice and practice for the dance went smoothly.  She had a total of 4 hours to learn the dance choreograph and practice.  She had some great people working with her and they made her look very good. 

She was blushing when she finished her dance number and went backstage.  There were some whistles from somewhere and her co-hosts told her how impressed they were with her dancing ability. 

He was watching the awards show live and saw his Eider commercial.  He saw the little girl.  Alright, so she is some kind of musical genius.  It is a possibility he conceded.  “What the hell? Since when did little girl become so grown-up?  And what is with her dancing like that? No way am I watching her throw herself at every man worldwide by dancing like that and what the hell?  Who chose the songs for her?  Frigging idiots - not good little girl, not good.”  He realized he was being quite vocal about her performance and he doesn’t even like her – in fact he can’t stand her.   “And what is with the shaking?  Does she think she is pole dancing or something?  Stupid little girl.”

Shin Hye was checking the entertainment news and saw the announcement from Min Young’s agency that she had broke up with Min Ho.  Then she saw the announcement from Min Ho’s agency confirming the break-up.  Her agency stated they broke up before the SBS Awards show and had gone their separate ways.  Min Young would not attend the SBS Awards Show with Min Ho. 

Shin Hye felt like someone had lifted a stone off her chest. 

Shin Hye checked out the SBS Awards Show and watched Min Ho’s role in City Hunter net him the Special Drama Top Prize.  Well done, she thought, but it’s not like I care one way or the other either.

She was reading, just by chance mind you, that his City Hunter role helped him secure the position of endorser for the Hyundai Veloster in China. 

Shin Hye was checking out entertainment news while she was sitting in her dressing room.  She saw where Min Ho was recognized by the Seoul Prosecutor’s Office as an “Honorable Prosecutor” in a ceremony January 4. 2012.  Between December 2011 and January 2012 the Asian-American Donor Program partnered with the Transplant Informers web-blog to run a special raffle for a full DVD boxed set of the City Hunter series.  It was part of an awareness campaign for bone-marrow transplants.  The promotion recognized City Hunter’s authentic depiction of a bone-marrow transplant; in City Hunter, Yoon-sung donated bone-marrow for his mother.  She thought, well he seems to be doing just fine.  Glad I don’t have to deal with him anymore and pity the girl that does. But it’s not like I care or anything. 

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Amsohappy
#1
Chapter 26: A Very Beautiful Story.....
sarahsusanti #2
Chapter 26: Thank you for yhe whole story and the ending...^_^
mschase6 #3
Chapter 26: They say that love and hate are two sides of the same coin. With this story, you have proven that to be the case. Carefully interweaving career facts of the two characters with the beautifully descriptive story of two people choosing hate as a way of denying their passionate love for one another, you have written a truly romantic story. Thank you for this work of fiction. You are a gifted writer.
avrylle #4
Chapter 26: Thank you for a nice story...^_^
estrelitacristino
#5
Chapter 26: Wow!Writer-nim,thanks for this wonderful story!Hoping it will come true,,,hehehehe^-^Waiting for your next story!
estrelitacristino
#6
Chapter 16: Writer-nim,ur really good!:-P,
iloveness
#7
Chapter 26: Thank you for this wonderful story...
rackyvirgo #8
Chapter 26: Thanks for this wonderful story, hope it will become real.
ikak88 #9
Chapter 26: gomawo chingu~aah....
kenkat #10
Chapter 26: A beautiful wedding and a ever lasting love ending! How we wish that it could come true one day!!! Thank you musoukanomake for all your labor of love! We are so luck to have you and you are an amazing writer :)) will be looking forward to your next story xoxoxo.....