"Jia?? OMG Jia? Are you okay?"

Kris was literally shouting when he saw me.

It was 2 hours later i found out that my mum and dad has passed away, my grandpa called and told me that both my parents passed away.

                                             I was hoping for this day a lot in my life tbh, of things i would do if they are gone. freedom that i would have, but when i got to know of it. when it wasn't the usual "what ifs", i didn't know what to feel. They were my parents. And they are now gone. I won't see them anymore. I won't get to talk to them or eat with them anymore. They won't get to see me debut, or get married, or get my first movie casting or my first musical. They won't be at any of that anymore. I kept flashback of all the meals or time that i could've spent with them. The things i would tell them. How i would whine bout my 12 older brothers. and my bossy unnie. how i could just pick up a phone call and i could have been more of a part of their lives.... most of the time I would blame them... I would say I am THEIR responsibilities, they should call me and check me up. Not me who would call and tell them about my life. but now...

                                      after that phone call, i kept calling my dad's phone. and his voicemails kept playing. he knew something was going to happen. he knew. they were both on the plane coming back from some business trip i don't even know. and the plane crashed. they knew... if only i could pick up the phone then i won't be listening to only voice messages right now.

                                             Kris was so shock he didn't know what to do with me sitting in the balcony with two very swollen eyes and a whole wet tshirt collar. he sat down and i looked up to him.  he had the softest eyes that i have ever laid on and all i did was sobbed harder and he pulled me gently in for a really tight and comforting hard. 

  I cried really loudly and jaeyeon unnie came out stompping her feet angrily shouting 

"SHUT THE HELL UP GOSH ITS..."

but her voice died down when she saw Kris shaking his head while hugging me with a very confused and concerned expression.