Charmaine lifted her head in answer to a subtle knock on her office door. She was surprised when she saw Steven striding in, a bleak expression on his face. She quickly got up and walked around her desk towards him, “Is something wrong?” she asked.

Steven looked at her boldly and answered, “Yes. Very wrong.”

Charmaine could feel her heart begin to race by the solemnity of his expression and those simple words. “What is it?” she breathed out, mentally preparing for whatever he had to say.

“Let’s sit down first,” Steven suggested and pulled her towards the sitting area by the ceiling to floor windows. When they were both seated, Steven said, “I’ve done something bad to you and it’s been killing me for years. I hate myself for keeping this secret for so long.”

Charmaine listen in silence wondering what could he have done that was so bad and this serious for him to have kept it a secret from her for so many years and what prompted him to confess now. With a tilt of her head she told him to go on.

Steven leaned forward and clasped his hands together on his knees and began, “First I want to tell you how sorry I am for everything. Even if you don't forgive me, I'll understand.”

Charmaine was once again stunned by the graveness on his face. She looked at him with anticipation, “What is it?” she repeated.

“It’s about Raymond Lam,” Steven said.

Charmaine shook her head and held up her hand to prevent him from going further. Putting on a blank face she said uneasily, “I don’t know the guy so I don’t see why you came here to talk to me about him. If it concerns business then you should be talking to my father.”

Steven guessed this was how she was going to react at the mention of Raymond. Still, he did not let that deflect him from his purpose. “Hear me out will you? After I’m done, then you can sort out how you really feel about him.”

“What do you mean really feel about him?” Charmaine asked, stunned by the knowledge that Steven apparently knew about her past with Raymond. She looked directly at him and asked, “What do you know and how?”

Steven took her hands in his, as he responded sadly, “Charmaine, five years ago, I told Raymond that you had an abortion and wanted a divorce.”

“What?” Charmaine whispered confused. “How did you know about that and why would you say that to him?”

Steven lowered his head in shame, unable to meet her eyes, “Your father told me to do that. He also intercepted all of Raymond’s calls to you when you were in the hospital. He wanted Raymond out of your life.”

Charmine snatched her hands from his grasp and burst out, “You’re lying! My father would not do that. I know he wasn’t fond of Raymond but he wouldn’t use this type of underhanded method to break us up. Why are you slandering my father?”

“It’s the truth,” Steven said slowly. He then lifted his eyes to Charmaine and found her staring at him in shock and anger. “Your father is also the one who caused you to have the miscarriage.”

Charmaine jumped up from her seat and slapped Steven on the face, “Miscarriages happen all the time. How dare you accuse my father of having a part in that!”

Steven’s hand flew up to cradle his injured face, “I deserved that but I’m telling you the truth. Your father told me that he was going to get rid of your baby.”

Charmaine searched his face and what she saw was shame, remorse and truth. She thought about that afternoon five years ago. Her father had insisted that she drink that soup and afterwards she began having the sharp pains which led to the miscarriage. At that time, even the doctors couldn’t explain what actually happened and simply said that miscarriages happen all the time with no specific reasons. She fell to the floor, her hands covering her face as she cried releasing all the pent up frustration and anger that has been bottled in her for the past five years.

Steven kneeled down beside her. He put his arm around her shoulders, “I’m sorry,” he said miserably. “If I could have another chance, I wouldn’t have taken a part in it.”

Charmaine slowly removed her hands. Tears continue to streak down her face as she looked up at Steven. In a soft aching voice, she asked, “Can you tell me how Raymond reacted when you told him that I had an abortion?”

Steven looked at her solemnly and nodded his head, “Raymond was upset and furious. He didn’t believe me at first, just as your father had said he wouldn’t. But your father had it set up so that when you two spoke again, you would each think the other wanted a divorce because there was no baby to keep you guys together. Didn’t your father convince you that Raymond wanted a divorce after you lost the baby?” When he saw the horror on Charmaine’s face he added, “He also had Raymond convinced that you had an abortion and that you wanted nothing more to do with him.”

Charmaine let the words sink as she slowly got to her feet. “Why are you telling me this now. You could have kept it a secret forever.”

Steven smiled sadly at her, “Ever since it happened I’ve been living every day with regret and shame. Since my father passed away no one stepped up to help me but Raymond. He did it with no strings attached out of loyalty and gratitude for my father. I could never repay him for his kindness and trust in me except to tell the truth.” He looked pleadingly at Charmaine and said softly, “I know I shouldn’t ask you this but would you be able to forgive me one day?”

Charmaine looked at him, a hard expression on her face, “I don’t know. This is all too much for me now.”

Steven nodded in understanding. He turned to the door and started walking out but stopped, “Charmaine, I hope you and Raymond could finally work things out and be happy.” Charmaine didn’t make any comment so Steven left.

Charmaine closed the door behind Steven and returned to her desk. Her mind was on Raymond as she replayed the scenes of all their encounters since his return. After the truth from Steven, she now understood why Raymond acted the way he did with her. She often wondered why he hated her and blamed her for what happened. Now she had her answer and it pleased her. Five years ago, he didn’t want to divorce her and he was just as upset as she was with the loss of their baby. She always suspected that he loved her, although he never said it out loud. Still, that was five years ago. He might have a girlfriend now or perhaps his only feelings for her were fondness and not love. Nevertheless, she wanted him to know the truth so that they could strip away all these years of misunderstanding and put it all behind them for good. Yes, she will definitely tell him the truth but she will deal with her father first.