My heart still hurts. Thought of him still get under my skin, rip my heart in every way it could. I can’t believe my eyes. I can’t even believe that I am so stupid to believe in a big player like him. Curse my naivety that makes me believe he could change for me. If I don’t walk on him that night, I might still with him. Fooling myself in believing each and every sweet word he mutters to me like it all were true. Deep sigh is the one and only thing that can come out from my mouth right now. Do I regret breaking up with him? Do I? Really? I don’t know the answer to that question. I sip on my latte trying to find any courage left to go to class. College means I might bump into him. Damn him and his sweet words. I don’t know how much longer I could stand his plead. Since that night he never gives up asking me to come back to him. I don’t understand why. He’s the one who cheated on me, why must he crawl back to get together? He’s the weird one not me, right? I grip my coffee cup tighter and walk my way to college, pray hard not to meet him today. If I do I know it’s my dooms day.

I put my books on my desk. Put on my headphone tuning on my favourite song while waiting for my class. His voice’s soothing me. His somewhat husky voice is one of the reasons why 2PM is my favourite idol group. I close my eyes and lay my head on the table trying to get away from all the mess. Damn my active nervous system, I can’t rest even for one mere second. I sigh again. This is my tenth sigh for this day and its only 8 in the morning. My life’s a mess. I guess this is too much for me to handle. I try my hardest to keep concentrate on my lecture. But I failed. He’s occupying my thought. More than anything. Should I give him another chance? This stupid thought come again disturbing me to the core.

I walk to college cafeteria to have lunch after my boring class has finally ended. I was so drown in my thought I don’t even realized there’s a person I would really like to avoid standing in front of me. I crash onto him and he smile at me when I take a look at him. I try to walk away silently, unfortunately he grab my hand. He drag me to a secluded place where we could have our privacy.

“Dear, forgive me. I know its my fault and I shouldn’t have do that. I am stupid. I really miss you. To the point I rather die than have to live without you in my life. Please, come back to me baby.” GO plead me.

I look into his pair of eyes, try to find any sincerity as he speaks those words. My heart starts to waver. I look down at my feet, thinking. Why  should we both been hurt for a mistake? Is this really worth been hurt? As I drown again in my thought I felt his hands cupped my face force me to look at him.

“I really, really miss your eyes.. your nose..your chubby cheeks..and your lips.” He kiss each of my parts of face as he speaks.

I closed my eyes, tight. Sway with each and every kisses he made. He parts our lips when I’m not responding. He rubs my cheeks slowly, and I open my eyes. I look into his eyes. My tear pool at the base of my eyes threatening to flow down my cheeks. Damn this emotion. I cave in, hug him tightly. Sob into his chest crying my heart out. He rubs the back of my head. I don’t know how long we’re in that position.

“Why would you do that oppa?” This question I hope I wouldn’t have to ask him, unfortunately I have to.

“I think maybe I just get bored of you on that day and I want to be free,” and it ripped my heart more as I listened to his answer.

“So now you’re not bored of me anymore?” another question leak from my lips. He looks at me and keeps quiet. Maybe he thinks the best answer to give to me without ripping my heart even more.

“No. I just felt so lost without you. I am miserable and I realized I need you in my life. Only you could make my life complete.” For once I really want to believe in him and give him another chance.

“Let me think about this oppa, about us. Do you really mean what you said? I really need to figure that out. In the meantime, please don’t contact me. I need my clear, rational mind. Now I need my lunch. My stomach grumbling and I have another class this evening” I said to him and walk away. He just watch me walk pass him, farther, farther away.