24.5 Hours In Heaven

Where the hell is this B2 gate?  My stomach begins to growl at me as I start to pass by all of the fast food stands that are located near the waiting areas. 

Ah, here it is, B2.  Right on time and still an hour before boarding.  I could probably go grab a quick bite and be right back, I thought.  I sit down for a second in the waiting area.  I feel like I'm forgetting something.  What am I forgetting...?  Damn, the other trainee...  I completely forgot about that.  I didn't even call her a day before or a few days before.  Gosh, I'm horrible.  Well, to be fair, she hasn't called me either.  What if she doesn't really want to call me, and that's why she hasn't done it?  I don't wanna bother her or anything, or seem annoying.  Maybe I could ask if she'd like to grab a bite with me before the flight?  Yeah... that seems pretty smooth and normal, right?

"Hello?"  she answered.

"Hey, ummm this is Amber speaking?  I'm the other trainee with I & M Entertainment?  We're supposed to be taking the same flight?"

"Oh!  Hey! Gawd, I'm so glad you called me!  I like, totally misplaced the e-mail so I didn't have your number, and I was getting so nervous."  she replied with a shy laugh.

"Oh!"  I said, laughing back lightly, and here I was thinking she didn't want to call me.  "Yeah, that's okay.  I'm glad I called you first then."  I said jokingly.

"Yeah, umm I'm Krystal, by the way, and you said 'Amber', right?"

"Yeahp."

"Nice to meet you!"  she said.  "Are you here at the airport already?"

"Umm yeah, I'm already at the gate, actually.  I was gonna ask you if you wanted to get a quick bite before getting on the plane, 'cause I'm stravin'."  I laughed bashfully. 

"Oh my god, yes.  I'm starving, too, but I'm not at the gate yet.  Where did you want to eat at?  I could totally meet you there.  I'm almost there."  she replied, a little out of breath.  It seems like she's always late to places.  Sheesh.  I paused for a second, and looked around real quick.  Taco Bell spotted.  Hell to the yeah.  Love me some tacos and burritos.

"Umm Taco Bell?"  I asked.

"Sounds good, I'll meet you there!"  she replied.

"Aight, see ya' there!"  Well, that didn't go so bad.  Turns out she had just lost my info.  I chuckled to myself as I walked to the Taco Bell stand.  I sat there for about, two minutes maybe?  My phone rang.  "Yo."  I answered.

"Hey, umm I'm here.  Where are you?"  she asked.  I waved.

"I'm waving."
 

She started walking up to me.  This girl...  This is the cute girl I bumped into at the auditions.  No wonder that name sounded so familiar.  I smiled at her and stood up to shake hands.  "Hey!  Guess rushing and bumping into me was pretty much worth it, huh?  You know, since you got the call and all... I'm sort of like a good luck charm."  I awkwardly said. 

"Huh?"  she asked with an awkward and light laugh, looking clueless for a second, as she shook my hand.  "Oh my god, you're the guy -- I mean, girl I bumped into that day?"  I nodded, and then kind of just realized the mistake she almost made.  Do I really look like that much of a dude?  I don't think so, at least.  I shrugged it off.  "I am so sorry, by the way, but yeah..."  she giggled  "...totally worth it." she said, teasing me back.

"So, what did you perform?"  I asked, as we got in line to order. 

"A Wonder Girls song.  'Be My Baby'."  she replied, feeling very accomplished.

"Oh wow, an actual K-pop song.  You can sing that?"  I asked.

"Duh... I'm Korean.  Well, Korean American, of course."

"Cheater."  I .  "I need to prep-up on my Korean.  You should be the one to help me."

"How much will you pay me?"  she asked with a jokingly serious face. 

"A million thank yous?  It's all I got right now."  I replied laughing, and she laughed lightly at my response.

"Soooo tacos?"  she asked with a smirk.

"Trying to decide between tacos or burritos.  Probably burritos.  Love me some burritos, man!"  I said, getting super excited.  Once we ordered and got seated, I unapologetically began to stuff my face, all the while she would glance at me every now and then with a soft giggle.  "What?"  I asked, looking up at her and away from my burrito, to which I was hungrily fixated on.

"Nothing."  she smiled. 

"I'm wondering, why would you go to Taco Bell and order a taco salad?"  I teasingly asked. 

"Once we get to M-Town, you know you won't be eating much of that, right?  They're going to put us on a strict diet.  So, I might as well start now, before it catches me off guard."  she explained. 

"And how do you know that?"  I curiously asked.  Her smile slowly disappeared, she looked down at her salad and started picking at it with her fork.

"My sister told me."  she answered.

"Oh..."  I said, as I continued to stuff my face into the burrito.  Seemed like something she didn't really want to elaborate on.  So, I didn't continue to poke at it.  "Well, they'll never take my burritos away from me!"  I jokingly said to try to lighten up the mood.  I looked up for a quick moment to see her smiling again.  Her smile is nothing short of adorable, and seeing her calmer now, seeing her up close, seeing her not so rushed -- I noticed that she was a lot more than just a cutie... she was beautiful.  But, it's to be expected; K-pop chicks are all so gorgeous.  In the back of my mind, I could definitely see myself starting to feel out of place once I got there.  I'm so different from all of them.  Gosh, they'll probably have me put on a cute, hot pink skirt and dance to Madonna.  Gosh... gosh no...

"Amber?"

"Huh?"  I replied, my lost eyes suddenly refocussing on her. 

"You totally spaced out for like a whole minute, and -- ummm here, let me..."  she scoffed and with a tender smile, she took a napkin and wiped some sour cream off my bottom lip, being that both my own hands were a burrito salsa mess. 

"Umm... thanks."  I said, kind of a little shocked that she just did that.  Well, I mean, we might as well start bonding and getting comfortable with each other now, right?  We're probably going to be spending every waking moment together.  "And... no I didn't."  I replied to her comment about me spacing out, pouting lightly and almost in a mumble.
   
"You soooo did."  she laughed adorably and went back to eating her salad.  "What were you thinking about?"  she asked.

"Well, I mean -- you're from L.A., too right?"  I asked.

"San Francisco."  she replied.

"Well yeah, so you'd understand, since we're both basically American.  As you can see, I dress like a total tomboy."  I began to explain.  "And..."

"And you're wondering if you're going to have to change your image completely once you become an idol."  she finished my sentence.

"Ummm... yeah.  Exactly."  I replied.

"Yes."  she answered bluntly.  "Like I said, they basically own us at this point.  We have to do what they tell us to do, and fit the cookie-cutter idol image."  she continued.

"You seem kind of bitter about it... almost as if you didn't really want to be here?"  I said, taking a risk as I sipped on my Coke.

"I... I do want to be here... I just..."  she bit her bottom lip, as her eyebrows and forehead wrinkled into discomfort.  I looked at her, trying to show concern, listening attentively.  "It's just so much pressure.  I want to do music.  I really do.  I love it so much, but..."

"... but?"  I asked.

"Nothing.  It's stupid. I'm being stupid."  she said with a scoff, trying to brush it off.  She quickly worked up a smile that showed to be, and quite obvious, not genuine at all.

"Hey, whatever it is, don't worry about it.  We're gonna be amazing."  I said with a smile, trying to give her the same words of encouragement my mom gave me. 

"ATTENTION ALL PASSENGERS BOARDING FLIGHT TO SEOUL, SOUTH KOREA. PLEASE REPORT TO GATE B2 FOR BOARDING."

"That's us."  I said, excited.  "Ready?"

"Definitely!"  she said, apparently feeling better.  She definitely tries to be enthusiastic, even when she doesn't really want to.  That's pretty admirable... pretty relatable.  "Do you think we're sitting together?"  she asked.

"I don't think they specified that on the e-mail.  I'm guessing they'd want us to sit together since they want us to 'bond' or whatever, but who knows?"  I responded.

"I have seat B12."  she said as we began to walk over to the boarding gate while reading her ticket.

"I have seat D12, a window seat."  I said.

"I don't think we're together."  she said with disappointment.  We entered the plane, and we began to scan through all of the numbers above each seat.  "We're across from each other."  she said with a light frown.  I was sitting on the window seat, and she was sitting on the outer seat.  We sat down and I smiled at her from across my seat, when suddenly, this huge bodybuilder guy sat right next to me.  And I mean huge.  Probably 6'5, at least.  I tilted my head forward to see her one last time, waving and smiling at her again.  Her frown went to a smile and back to a frown again as soon as I sat back.  We were both scared.  We were both nervous.  We were both excited.  Would've been nice if we could at least sit together and share the thrills.  Well, this is stupid.  You'd think they'd assign us to sit together.  I sighed.  I pulled up the window cover and looked out at the L.A. Airport, at all the people, at all the faces, at all that I would miss.  I can't smell the L.A. air from inside of here anymore.  This is really it.  I took out my phone and sent Jackie a text message.

                "Hey, i know ure in class, so thats y Im not calling, but... Im on the plane, bout to head out. Last txt i send u i guess. For now at least. Peace out dork. Love u. dont repeat that."

Yeahp.  Peace out, L.A.

"READY FOR DEPARTURE..."  

As the plane was beginning to set flight, the huge guy looked down at me and smiled.  I nervously smiled back.  Funny how such intimidating figures still show kindness. 

"Oh! My gosh!  I'm so excited!"  the guy busted out saying in the most flamboyant voice possible, as he lightly touched my shoulder while limping his wrist.  I didn't want to assume anything, but come on.  He looks like he could crush god's soul in the blink of an eye, yet the personality of a total fairy.  "Oh, I'm so sorry, hun. It's my first time flying, and I just can't contain myself.  My name is Jesse, by the way."  he continued.

"Hey... no problem, man.  I feel ya'.  Amber, here.  Pleasure."  I said with a chuckle.  "You're flying alone?"  I asked, curious.

"Oh, yes!  I'm going to Seoul to visit my partner."  he said, excited, but kind of reluctant to continue talking.  I kind of knew why, too.  When else do we use the word 'partner'?  He probably thinks I'm the typical Asian conservative heading back home or something.  So, he probably thinks I'm going to judge him.

"Oh, nice!"  I said, with a huge and genuine smile, trying to reassure him that he had nothing to be reluctant about.

He responded with an even bigger smile and said, "Mhhm, we are trying to ummm -- you know, get the papers and things like that... but oh girl, it's been such a hassle, you know.  Because it's even harder for us to..."  and then he whispered  "...get married." 

"Yeah..."  I responded, kinda frowned a bit and said,  "...but it does get better."  and smiled again.

"Oh yes it does, sister!"  he said with a bold laugh.  "Are you going back home?"  he asked, just as I suspected he thought.

"Umm... no.  I'm umm -- I'm not Korean or live there."  I answered.

"Oh!  I'm sorry, girl!"  he said, a bit embarrassed.

"Oh no, no, it's fine.  I get it all the time -- Japanese, Korean, Chinese... well, I am technically Chinese.  My family is from Taiwan, but I'm American."

"Oh, I see.  Asians are so complex.  I'm always fascinated by my boo's culture."

"Haha yeah!  I guess so.  I think I'm pretty simple, though."

"So, what brings you to Seoul?"  he asked, still curious, just as curious as me.

"Umm, well a career, hopefully."  I chuckled.

"Oh, I see."

"Yeah, I was just recruited for a K-pop company."

"Oh, K-pop!  My boo doesn't really like it.  Says it's so overrated, but I looooooove it!  It's so fun!  Oh and I looooove the choreography!  You all look so cuuuute!"

"Hahah!  You think so?  That's good to hear."  I said, pretty happy to hear some good vibes about the music I'm about to get into.  I mean yeah, K-pop is hella overrated, stereotyped and what have you.  But, hopefully I can change that, even if just a little bit.  They might try and change me, but I promise to definitely stay true to who I am, no matter what.  Of course, I'm saying that now.  Who knows what I'll do once I'm in the hands of management, rules, regulations, peer pressure...

...I sighed.

I looked out my window to see the clouds, as the plane finally stabilized, as it finally began to drift steadily.  It seems so calm viewing it from the inside, but on the outside, I know the turbines are probably loud as hell.  Still, amazing how something so heavy can work its way up against the high pressure of the sky, and then maintain itself so high... and fly.

"You here all alone, hun?"  he asked.  I quickly turned back towards him. 

"Naw, I'm here with her."  I leaned forward and I pointed at Krystal.  "I think we're going to be in the same group."

"Oh, I see."  he said, pensive.

I couldn't help but catch myself holding my stare towards her, and I bashfully chuckled at myself once I realized I was.  She was listening to music on her phone, it seemed, because she was lightly bobbing her head.  It looked like she was pretty lost in it too, while her hand held onto a pen, and she was stuffed in between the pages of some notebook -- writing, drawing?  I wondered... a diary maybe?  The profile of her pensive look... it was graceful, to say the least.  She's shy, yet exciteful, and then shy again.  She wiggled her nose as if trying to scratch it without having to remove her hands from her pen and notebook.  I smiled and leaned back into my seat.

I felt bad.  I was here sitting next to this awesome gay dude, and she was there... alone, for 24 hours.  She doesn't seem like the type of person who would willingly get into conversations with random people either.  Sitting next to her: a middle-aged Caucasian guy in a business suit.

Lights flashed in front of me and my chain of thoughts broke. 

Finally, the seatbelt lights went off.  I've been wanting to pee for the longest fre