It’s been a great three years of high school and we’ve both got one year left ahead of us.  So I sit here, now, wondering what’s going to happen.

From now and until the end of the next school year, I’ll be crying more often.  I know that.  I’ll have to run from class to class just to avoid seeing you with him.  I have to avoid thinking about you because my eyes will start watering.  I’ll be really quiet because if I talk, my voice will crack.  I’ll be letting this secret eat me from the inside out.

But regardless, I’ll still be carrying your books for you, I’ll still be helping you figure out homework questions in the middle of the night, I’ll still be smiling like a fool when you look at me, I’ll still have to catch my breath after hearing you laugh, my heart will still skip a beat every time I see your name and I’ll still feel compassion for you.

What if I confessed to you and on some odd chance, you felt the same way about me?  What if I actually got my happy ending?

Well…  First, I’d take you on a date.  I’d take you to that restaurant you said you wanted us to go to.  And this time, it’d just be us two.  No Nichkhun, no Jessica, no Leeteuk…  It’d be perfect because nobody else would ruin it.

“Ready?”

“…  I think.”

I’d smile and admire your sense of fashion.

“Wow…”

It’s not like we’d go to a fancy restaurant on a first date… But something about a simple hoodie and jeans makes you look perfect.  I don’t know…  So I like simplicity.  Kill me.

I’d hold the door open for you and then put on a goofy smile.

“Ladies first.  Hah…”

“Tae, that doesn’t exactly work… We’re both-”

“Hey.  I tried.  Hahaha.”

The entire time, you could go on and on and on but I’d listen.  I’d remember everything that you said.  Although, I might miss out on some things because I’ll be too busy staring at you.

“Tae, we should do that later.”

“Do what?”

“….  I just said it.”

“I’m sorry…  I’m just too busy uhm…”

“Too busy… doing what?”

And of course, I’d blush and try to explain.

“… Staring.”

Then like always, you’d grin and laugh at how stupid I’m being.

“You’re such a dork!”

“Hey…  I’m your dork, now.  So I’m your responsibility.”

“I know.  I don’t mind.”

Then after, we’d walk back to your house.  On the way, we probably wouldn’t even say a word.  But it’d be alright because the silence doesn’t matter.  Your presence is loud enough for me.

“My hands are cold…  I should’ve brought gloves.”

“Give me your hands.”

“Why?”

I’d hold your hand and squeeze it lightly to let you know that even if it’s snowing, you still make me feel warm.

“Better?”

“Better.”

Then you’d give me that thousand-watt smile that makes me melt every time I see it.

And hey, if you want to stop by a candy store for some jellybeans, sure.  I’ll buy some for you.  But I won’t eat any because I’ve got all the sweets I need, standing right next to me.

We’d arrive at your house and we’d watch movies or play video games like we used to.  You never had a love for video games like I did, but you always wanted to play them with me.  But honestly, I don’t care what we do.  As long as we do them together, I’ll be happy with it.

“Hah, I beat you again!”

“Fany-ah, you’re good at this.”

I’m good at video games.  I’m a gamer.  But honestly, my mind won’t be on the game if there’s an angel sitting next to me.

Maybe after a few games, I’d ask you to dance.  Yes, right there in your living room.  It sounds stupid and I don’t know why this is even in my head but I really want to try it.  In all of those movies, apparently slow dancing is a magical moment.  Let’s see for ourselves.

You know, even after all that, there isn’t really much different than how we are now.  Actually, it’s exactly the same.  We’re like an unofficial couple.  You even asked if we could get matching rings.

I’d buy them and then one day, I’d surprise you.

“Hey, Merry Christmas!  I got you something.”

“And what would that be?”

I’d hold up my necklace with the ring on it.  Then I’d hold up yours, still in its box.

“I still remember that you wanted us to have these.  Well…  Now we do.”

“Tae!  Oh my gosh, they look amazing!”

They’d be symbolic.  I still haven’t decided on what to engrave yet but I’ll think of something.  So far, I’ve got your suggestion about us and our ‘smile’ phrases.  But I feel like we can do better because my ring is going to be with me forever.  I want it to hold as much sentimental value as possible.

They’d make great Christmas or birthday gifts.  Speaking of which…  I’d try to get you the most amazing present ever.  I don’t know if I can top my gift of a thousand cranes to you, but I can try.  It’d be difficult because time and effort is the greatest gift you can give anyone and I spent months with that gift on my to-do list.

I want to give you something amazing because you’re amazing and that’s what you deserve.  I want to get you something valuable but not exactly expensive.  I want to get you something that’s cool to me but not tacky.  I want to get you something that’ll last for a long time and it’ll never go out of style.  I’ll get you something that’s exactly like you; priceless, dazzling and classic.

I can’t even list the things I’d do for you because honestly, I’ve never been this close to insanity.  Well, that and I don’t have a piece of paper long enough to write it on.  If by some miracle, you felt the same about me as I do about you, who knows what I’d be like?  Since our current status is still friendship, I don’t know how I’d be if we were together.

I really want to find out, though.

I'll be honest, this chapter and the next one will kind of be a filler for the very last chapter.  The last few chapters aren't going to be that long in length, but please take the time to read them thoroughly.  It's the quality and not the quantity that counts, right?  Hehehe...

I've decided on the ending that I wanted for this story and I really hope you guys like it!  It's simple but I think it's nice.

Happy reading! ♥