Chapter 3
The way you make me feel~
OST:
Seunghyun laid in his room tossing his football up in the air and wishing he could be somewhere else in the world, rather than hearing the series laughter both Taemin and Jiyong were sharing in the living room. After the whole wishing Jiyong death thing over a month ago, so many things had changed; he decided to take a step back, and go with the flow. Jiyong was now widely known in school, the students now called him Heisenberg from some show or something but he couldn’t care less.
He saw something wriggle itself into his room, "You again"? he asked the little puppy wagging it's tail on the floor. "No way, I am not carrying you again. You peed on me the last time" The stupid puppy was always wandering into his room. The first time he saw the dog, he accidentally let it slip that the dog looked and acted like the owner. He didn't mean anything bad by it, and surely didn't expect Jiyong to cry, or to be scolded by Jiyong's caregiver, Yoomi. "No" he said to the puppy, and it whined. "Argh, why do you have to be so cute"? he picked the little wrinkly monster, and it proceeded to his face, "Woah you're getting bigger aren't you"? he fetched some cookies that were laying on his beside and fed it to the dog, "Here you go, now you can go poop on your maker's bed " he did his evil laugh, "Are you here to keep me company after your maker stole my friend, or were to you too scared to go down the stairs by yourself again because I'm not doing you any favors. Our friendship is supposed to be a secret remember"? He played with the puppy for a while before it became bored of him, and was crying to get down. He let the puppy down, and it bolted out of his room. Great
Taemin and Jiyong were spending time together more often; Taemin was apparently getting chemistry lessons from Jiyong. ‘Hyung how could you do that’? He heard Jiyong ask, which was followed by a round of laughter. Why the hell are they so loud, and what’s with the echo? He increased the volume of the music
After the whole incident, he never got to apologize although he wanted to. It was just hard; he could barely even look Jiyong in the eye especially since Jiyong already lied to the folks that he did apologize. Too bad the parents weren’t stupid, they knew, and it strained his relationship with his mother. They weren’t as close as they used to be, there were no more nighttime ddukboki snacks, no more random drive to nowhere and he missed her a little.
‘Jiyong, I definitely got that right’. It was Taemin’s voice this time, and once again, he let his fingers get lost on the volume of the song playing.
We're gonna die young
We're gonna die young
He laughed at the irony of the lyrics, if the folks were home they would probably freak out for no reason. “Hey”. Taemin walked into the room, hands in pocket. “Time for the Brigg” Taemin jumped on his bed, “Let’s go, Jiwon and Jo have been texting me”.
He also got texts from a bunch of people but ignored them, “Eh, I don’t feel like it”. He really didn’t, people always asked about Jiyong every time he went there. It wasn’t like he stopped Jiyong from going; the boy just knew his place was all. “You go”
“Seunghyun are you pissed that Jiyong and I are hanging out? You know he’s just my tutor right”? Taemin said in all seriousness, “You could use some of that tutoring”?
He couldn’t help but laugh, “Why would I be pissed? I’m just shocked. I mean what do guys talk about anyways, you two are always laughing”. He definitely wasn’t angry, it was just a little surprising. Taemin picked the remote and decreased the volume, “Jiyong is awesome Seunghyun, but you wouldn’t know because you don’t talk to him”
“Whatever, go to the Brigg without me”.
“Lana’s at the Brigg” Taemin said which got Seunghyun’s attention, “Well what are you waiting for”? Seunghyun jumped off the bed, “Let’s go”, he ruffled through his coats, it was December it was freezing out.
“You know Suzy is Jiyong’s friend right? For all you know, he’s probably Lana’s… I bet he could get her to like you”
Seunghyun took a moment to think about it, “Well that’s true, I could use him to get Lana”, he laughed as he watched how angry Taemin was getting, “Well you gave me the idea, Gee”
The boys made their way downstairs shoving each other, racing to see who would make it down first. “Hyung you forgot your pen” Jiyong walked up to them, blocking their way, “Thanks”
Seunghyun rolled his eyes as he watched the two; Taemin’s niceness was getting a little annoying, some of their classmates even joked that Taemin seemed more of an older brother than him, but then again, he didn’t care.
Five months, he kept telling himself; five months until he left moved out of the house and he couldn’t wait. Although his parents always shoved it under the rug, he kept on singing it in their ears; he was going to get an apartment the moment he started college. At first he thought about leaving for America to stay with his grand uncle but he knew he couldn’t do that to his parents, it wasn’t their fault at all, the house was just a little stuffy.
“Jiyong why don’t you come to the Brigg with us”? Taemin asked while Seunghyun stood aside reserving his comment. “No hyung, I have a lot of homework to catch up on and it’s almost finals”. Seunghyun shifted uncomfortably, “Well let’s go T, it’s probably for the best. It’s cold outside and he might get sick again” he said and walked out, leaving the two behind. ugh why did I say that, it’s not like I’ve been watching him or anything, I just know because he’s been missing a lot of school and people have been asking around. He casually kicked the snow as he waited for Taemin. Five more months.
The great thing about college was that he was going to be by himself, he already had an eye on an art school, that way he would have to accidentally run into Jiyong at all since Jiyong was into the sciences. It would be perfect. If he was going to be totally honest, there were times when he was a little jealous of Jiyong; Jiyong always know what he wanted to become, a doctor no less, which made him closer to the folks. It was funny because he himself, their real son had no idea what he wanted to do with his life; he was never good at anything much except sports.
***
“Again? Oh no” Mirae screamed on the phone, she and Jiyong were having breakfast when someone from the clinic called, “did you try calling Dr. Lee or Dr. Kim”? There was an emergency at the hospital and she was the closest doctor available. “Okay I’m on my way”.
“Mom is everything okay”?
“Yes it is, but I can’t take you to school today”, with all the drivers on their holiday vacation, she was the one taking Jiyong to school and Eun Hyuk picking him up since Jiyong had his volunteer at the hospital. “Maybe you shouldn’t go today... you should rest anyways”
“But mom, I have a test today” Jiyong complained. People were starting to ask questions about why he didn’t how up some days and the lie about being too cool for school was getting a little old. He really didn’t want people finding out about his health. “I can take a taxi”
“Nonsense, if I had my way you wouldn’t be going to school when it’s zero degrees outside but....” Seunghyun ran to the room, “Hey mom, I’m off to school” he leaned to kiss her on the cheek.
“I got it” She cheered, “Seunghyun, you take Jiyong to school, and....”
“But mom..” Seunghyun was starting to whine but she stopped him, “Don’t but mom me, it’s a little ridiculous that you two attend the same school and go separately”.
“Fasten your seatbelt” Seunghyun grumbled as they both entered the car. No one could win against his mother, not even his father. “Sorry hyung” Jiyong quickly strapped himself in; he was beside himself. It was the first time he was entering Seunghyun’s car. “Sorry, I told her to allow me take a taxi”
“Stop” Seunghyun kept his eyes on the road, “Please just stop, you may have fooled everyone else with your cute I’m sorry crap but it doesn’t work on me”. His life was frustrating enough with Lana ignoring him all the time, the last thing he wanted was to be someone’s driver, “Everything has been great this last month; I left you alone, you left me alone. Just continue to stay away from me, my table and the Brigg as you’ve been doing and we’ll get through the next five months fine. That’s all I ask”.
Jiyong gulped, “Five months”? He looked at Seunghyun, whose eyes were unblinkingly fixed on the road. “What is happening after five months”? He couldn't stop himself from asking. “Am I going back to the orphanage”?
Seunghyun laughed, “Of course not, why would you think that? They would much rather send me to an orphanage than you” he then spoke seriously, “In five months I would be out of your hair”. He said before took a quick peek at Jiyong, and regretted it immediately. Jiyong looked like someone had just delivered the worst news possible. “Oh, don’t look like that....” Jiyong was still looking at him and it felt uncomfortable, so he a laughed, a tad awkwardly, “you know you’re excited that I’m leaving...Seunghyun, the wicked witch of the east is gone”, he tried making a joke but it only ended up worsening the mood. It was freezing, but he was starting to sweat.
They finally arrived at school, and Seunghyun parked his car in his normal parking spot but neither of them moved, “Hyung...” Jiyong called, but he remained silent, “Do you really think I'll be happy to see you go”? He couldn't answer. As mush as he wanted to say yes, a part of him knew that it would be a lie. He could see Jiyong’s head bowed, making him feel a little bad. He thought Jiyong was going to be happy.
“Is it because of me”?
“I know you’re Mr. know it all, but some of us have to get to class so you need to get out so I can lock my car. Thanks”, and that did it; Jiyong got out and walked away. The conversation certainly didn’t go as expected.
School was school as always; he learned things, some relevant and some weren’t, “Hey did something happen to Jiyong, he’s been down all day” Taemin asked as he sat beside him during their last period together, and as much as he wanted to lie, he noticed it too. Jiyong was always high-fiving someone or smiling with his stupid gummy smile but he looked a little zoned out, and he only noticed because people asked. “I don’t know”, he went back to eating his food and keeping all things Jiyong out his mind. It always gave him indigestion.
Football season was over, but it was basketball season, which meant more and longer practices after school “I wish we didn’t have basketball practice today, I mean it’s Thursday. Why can’t we get today off”? One of the boys complained as they were getting changed for practices. Seunghyun personally hated basketball, he only did it so he could have more time out of the house and it was a good workout but now he was in it too deep to quit.
Seunghyun>>>Alien
Hey, it’s Seunghyun. I have practice and it might take a while so you can call mom or take a cab.
“Okay everyone, turn off your phones...” the coach commanded “put the phone in your bags, and your bags in your lockers and lets head to the court”.
3 hours later
“I dunno....coach was a bit tough today” Jo complained as the four boys limped to their cars, “When isn’t he ever tough, too bad the basketball team isn’t ever going to be as good as the football team” Jiwon said this time.
“Do you guys want to come over to my house to finish the game we started yesterday”? Taemin asked and they all agreed.
“Woah, what time is it”? Jiwon eyed his watch; the four had been playing the video games for several hours, “It looks so dark out”
“Well it’s winter so of course its dark...it’s only 8” Taemin turned of the console, “But we have to be at the Brigg in no time so go home, take a shower and we’ll see later”
The boys started filing out until it remained Taemin and Seunghyun. “Hey, I’ve been trying to text Jiyong but he isn’t responding...is everything okay”? Taemin asked as Seunghyun hopped into his car.
“Yo T, are you in love with my brother or something”?
“Just because you’re an to him doesn’t mean that I have to be... just think how it must feel for him to have to live in a place where he doesn’t feel welcome”?
Seunghyun sighed, “Oh he’s more than welcome alright”?
“Are you sure”? Taemin slammed the car door, and walked back into his house, “Good night Choi”
Whatever, I didn’t do anything. He did it himself… what more could he want?, he grumbled on the drive home.
He was turning into the driveway of his house when something blue on the floor of the passenger side caught his eyes; it was one of Jiyong’s inhalers. Now he’s turning my car into his room… great!
Seunghyun stepped into the house to see his mother sitting on one of chairs in the kitchen, with a file in one hand, and a glass of water in one. “Hey mom” he kissed her on the cheek. “Hey” she said distracted, looking over his shoulder as if expecting someone else to walk in, “Taemin isn’t with me”, he laughed as he opened the fridge to grab a can of soda. “No...Jiyong. Where’s Jiyong, I thought he was with you” Mirae stood up.
“Why would he be with me, he’s in his room” Seunghyun stuffed his mouth with one of the dinner rolls that was lying on the kitchen counter, “Seunghyun what are you talking about, I have been home all this while. I texted him to ask where he was and he said he was with you..” the alarm in Mirae’s head was already going off, “Seunghyun that was over two hours ago... where is he”? He gaze drifted to Seunghyun’s hand, “Is that his inhaler”?
“Yes he left it in my car this morning” he placed the item on the kitchen counter, “mom relax, I had basketball practice so I told him to take a cab or call you. Maybe he’s with dad”
“OH GOD, I just got of the phone with your dad thirty minutes ago” Mirae broke into tears as she pulled out her phone to call her husband.
45 MINUTES LATER
“I can’t believe this is happening” Mirae was still crying, Eun Hyuk was with her. He'd rushed straight home after hearing of Jiyong’s disappearance. They had called the police; Seunghyun even made several posts on Facebook but no one had seen Jiyong. “How can this be happening, it’s snowing and he doesn’t have his inhaler. This is my fault…. I should have known better than believe that the two of you were hanging out” she shot Seunghyun an angry look.
“Mirae calm down, we’ll find him”
“How? Even after calling in favors, the police haven’t seen anyone matching his description, and the security guard at the school said there was no one there before the turned of all the lights. Where could he be”?
Taemin rushed into the house “I came as soon as I saw Seunghyun’s post on Facebook”, he gave Mirae a quick hug.
“Did you hear anything”? Eun hyuk asked, and Taemin shook his head sadly. “Sorry sir, but a lot of people in school have his picture up on Facebook and on twitter incase anyone sees him” he said before walking up to Seunghyun, “Hey what happened to your phone? I’ve been trying to call you” Taemin asked Seunghyun who was beside of himself.
“My phone”? He thought before realizing that his phone had been off since he sent the text to Jiyong about taking a taxi. “I’ll be back” he ran to his car and searched his bag for his phone. Please, he said a silent prayer before switching it on, and several text messages appeared on the screen right away. He scrolled past the ones that were from concerned classmates to the ones from Jiyong.
Alien>>>Seunghyun
It’s okay hyung. I’ll wait for you
Alien>>>Seunghyun
Hyung I’m still waiting :)
Alien>>>Seunghyun
Hyung, mom just texted me and I told her I was with you so she wouldn’t scold us, so if she calls you just tell her the same.
Alien>>>Seunghyun
Hyung, the security guard is locking all the doors to the classroom so I’ll hide and wait in the old music room
Alien>>>Seunghyun
Hyung I’m sorry, but my battery is about to die. I’ll wait for you here so we wouldn’t miss each other.
Without reading further, he threw his phone on the passenger seat and sped away. It had to be the adrenalin because he was driving over 80 miles; it usually took him twenty minutes to get to school, but he was there in ten. The front gates were locked so he had to go through the back; luckily for him, he had the keys to the gate that usually led the football players out on the field.
Seunghyun>>>Taemin
I think I know where Jiyong is. Have my dad send an ambulance to school, and tell them to come through the back gate. Immediately!
“JIYONG”! He screamed multiple times as he ran toward the old music room, he could have sworn he was a fast runner but his legs were slow for some reason. “Jiyong” he finally got the old music room, but Jiyong was nowhere to be found. “Jiyong”? The room was a little dark, so he used his phone as a torch. There were old instruments stacked all over the place, and he was looking though them when he caught sight of a person under the grand piano. It was Jiyong; he could recognize the hair from a million miles, away. “Jiyong” he ran to him, crawled under and shook the lifeless body, “NO NO NO NO NO...Jiyong please wake up”, his eyes started watering, “OH GOD JIYONG PLEASE... PLEASE, YOU CAN’T DO THIS”, how would his parents react,? “Jiyong please...” he hugged him.
“Hyung”? He heard Jiyong’s voice, “Hyung are you okay, why are you crying”?
“Jiyong”? He pulled back to be sure, “Jiyong you.....”
“Hyung are you crying”? Jiyong reached to wipe of his tears but he pulled back, “DO YOU THINK IT WAS FUN SCARING ME LIKE THAT, DO YOU THINK IT WAS FUNNY...YOU NEARLY SCARED ME TO DEATH”!!!!
“But I was waiting for you and my body started hurting so I fell asleep” Jiyong frowned.
“WHY DIDN'T YOU ANSWER WHEN I CALLED YOUR NAME AND SHOOK YOU. YOU LOOKED LIKE A DEAD PERSON”!
“Hyung I’ve been hearing you call my name for the last couple of hours but it was always just in my head, and I really thought it was still in my head until you hugged me” Jiyong smiled, while Seunghyun sighed. “Hyung I knew you wouldn’t forget me”
“Don’t smile like that” Seunghyun collapsed on the floor beside Jiyong, “I really did forget, kind of” he finally looked at Jiyong, “You left your inhaler in my car, what if you couldn't breathe”?
“I have another one” Jiyong waved the blue thing in his face. “I’m not made of glass hyung”. They sat silently for a while, “Jiyong... I’ve never been so scared in my entire life... I at least had a little faith while driving here, but when I saw you lying still under the piano....” he looked at Jiyong, “I was so scared” he looked away. Maybe it was the fear that he almost lost someone who he spent his entire life hating, or maybe he was just tired of it all, but he was going to let go.
“Hyung, I’m sorry”
“You know on my drive here, I vowed that I would be the best brother to you if you were okay”. It was silent again.
“Hyong, i would kell had...” Seunghyun was confused as to what Jiyong was saying when he noticed how fast Jiyong had paled up. “Jiyong are you okay? are....” Jiyong was suddenly screaming in pain, and rolling on the floor, “Hyung, it hurts”
“Jiyong are you joking because....”
“Please make it stop”. It was then he knew Jiyong was being serious because he could hear the agony in Jiyong’s voice. “Mom.....mom..” Jiyong was suddenly crying amidst being clenched up.
“Ji....” he heard the siren from outside, he picked Jiyong up bridal style and ran out as fast as he could. It suddenly felt as if he could run faster than the speed of light. He arrived outside and the EMT's took Jiyong from him and placed him on a gurney. “It doesn’t seem like an asthma attack” oen of the EMT's commented as they examined him, “Let’s rush him to the ER, his blood pressure is climbing” the other said as they raised the gurney and placed in the van.
“I’ll drive behind you so...” Seunghyun said as he took a step back, he wasn’t even sure if he could drive with his shaky hands. He'd witnessed some of his frieds blow out thier knees during a game, but none of them ever looked as bad as Jiyong did. “Hyung please don’t leave me”, he heard Jiyong cry out from the van, and he jumped in without thinking. “Hyung…” Jiyong reached out for him, and he took Jiyong’s hands in his, he couldn’t help but notice how frail and cold Jiyong’s hands were. It was the first time, he'd ever felt Jiyong's hand. He knew the boy was underweight it was just then ke knew just how underweight he was.
“He’s in a lot of pain right now, his blood pressure is off the charts and would be crashing soon….” Seunghyun heard one of the EMT’s on the phone, “Yes, have a team at the door, we’ll be pulling in soon”.
“Hyung..” Jiyong’s cry pulled him out from the nostalgia; Jiyong was now red with tears falling from his eyes. It was different from how he always saw Jiyong; Jiyong was always so upbeat and smiling, and he couldn’t help but wonder how many times his parents must have been through this situation, “Hyung it hurts…hyung please don’t leave me”
“I won't leave you, I promise.....Jiyong I’m so sorry but it will be alright soon okay”? It was going to be fine, they were going to be fine. It had to be fine.
A/N cOrNeR
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