Sitting up from your bed, you sighed. You cast a glance over to the folder that was innocently perched on your desk. You had found that folder after you had come in from your small outing with Taekwoon and his friends. Your mother had little to no subtlety which was something she shared with Nunji.

That folder contained a list of academies and tutors. All of which were dedicated toward the dreaded last year of high school and the Test that comes with it. The Test.

You shuddered just at the thought of it. You flopped back down on your bed.

You could hear Mieun’s cries a floor below as your head rolled to the side. That folder caught your eye again. You dragged yourself off of the bed and walked to your chair and plopped down. You pulled out that listing and old childhood thoughts and dreams of going to the greatest schools took the forefront. They weren’t so much childish as common but you had put those thoughts to the side when you realized that college was ages away, back when you were in elementary school. But now it was less than two years.

You had consistently been in the top twenty in the academic standings of your grade, even breaking the top five at times. You don’t always feel the pressure of quizzes or tests so you’ve yet to experience a breakdown of sorts that you’ve witnessed through your classmates. Overall, you felt confident with your chances of getting in a decent college or university. But it was hard to express that confidence to your mother who was a natural worrier. You had a feeling Nunji saw that in you but she was your sister. The closest bond you have with another human being was through her though you would never tell her or your parents that.

It wasn’t a lack of confidence that was holding your back from going all out on studying. It was a lack of ambition. You didn’t have any passion career wise. Children were taught to think a passing grade (an A or a 100) was all that mattered but that was a lot of closemindedness. Achieving those high scores would be complimentary but if the purpose is just to get those scores, there’s no ambition. If the grades were a means to an end such as a degree in engineering or law, then that would be considered ambition. At least in your eyes that was what you believed. There was an intricacy that went along with it. Nunji had shared this tidbit of information with you when you had been in elementary school. She was ultimately the catalyst of your ease on your schoolwork and indirectly, your lack of ambition.

From your early memories, you had seen how your parents had been harsh with your sister with her studies. It was something that had been engrained in certain societies with little to no teachings on how to adjust and work with the pressure. It was all thanks to your older sister that your parents weren’t as aggressive as some parents may be. So that folder on your desk had been a message and a warning that you could appreciate. You didn’t see it as a push but as a reminder in regards to your new relationship.

Taekwoon. Jung Taekwoon. Your boyfriend.

You made a face.

It was hard not to react to that word when associated with him. He was a lot of things. He was Jung Taekwoon. And you were still learning more about him. You’ve seen him in situations that have helped you get a better understanding. Yet there was much more to learn.

He was the person you didn’t know you wanted. He snuck up on you and nudged his way into your head as sleek as can be. But he was a recent addition to all of your priorities. He was added to the things you cherish and held dear to your heart. You could only hope that he would want the best for you in all aspects of your life. And right now, judging by the folder you were thumbing through again, you mother had a reason to worry academically.

It looked like it was your turn to force a conversation this way.

It would be wise to plan for this course of action but you didn’t know what to expect when it came to Taekwoon’s response. Going off of his change in expression regarding school work, you had to express yourself in the right way. If you two were going to be a couple in a high school setting, you would have to be a couple with high school worries on the brink of college.

The winter term was nearing and that included mid-terms. Only doing the homework and light reading on each subject wouldn’t do. You would have to start memorizing facts that your class has yet to cover. Test time meant going beyond your studying limits. There will be trick questions to see if a student has memorized certain things with little application involved.

Just the thought of it was draining.

In your eyes, as a student, you could use this upcoming tide as a way to gage Taekwoon. To observe as much as you could. You had done something similar with Sanghyun and you could only trust in Taekwoon to pass another test.

The school you attend was on the higher end of education and potential students had to apply for the test and pass it before admittance was granted. Based on this fact, Taekwoon has proven something. Even if he was at the school for sports, academics did play a role in the selection. That didn’t take into account of any underhand dealings financially from his family, not that you were accusing but it was a possibility nonetheless.

That was still something you had to learn about Taekwoon. His family. There hasn’t been a situation that presented itself where you could find out about that part of him. You could wait it out until such a situation presented itself or you could simply ask him. You groaned and lay your head on top of the folder.

Being silent was next to impossible anyways unless you were actually mute. Like Nunji said, you would have to grow up knowing the world would force you to. And that push came in the form of a relationship with a boy. A quiet boy.

At least he would know about the necessary effort to speak for the two of you and appreciate your words.

“Mikyungie!” you lifted your head up at your name being called from downstairs. You yawned as you opened the door and walked down to the bottom floor. “Mikyungie!”

You hummed to let your sister know you heard her. She turned to face you in the kitchen, “Take care of Mieun while I cook.” She held the baby out to you.

You nodded as you took the small bundle of a baby from her. Instead of going all the way back to your room, you sat down at the dining table as Nunji rummaged through the fridge and cabinets for ingredients.

You divided your attention between watching her and smiling at your niece. When Mieun smiled back at you, you lost yourself in her. She was too precious.

“Hey little sister,” Nunji called out to you making you look up, “When does your practice start?”

“Tuesday.” You turned back to Mieun.

“Do you want to go shopping later? I think you’ll need new sporting clothes and shoes. I’ll probably get you a new gym bag too.”

You looked up at her sharply while your grip on your niece fractionally tightened. She was in a good mood.

“I remember when I was on a team,” she didn’t pay you any mind. “We were a pretty decent team for a while but things got in the way.” Her eyes flickered to you for a second, before recommencing her search for ingredients. “Our best spiker lost her zest to her boyfriend, you see.” There it was.  As subtle as ever. “Then there was the setter who caused too much drama. Do you know she actually tried to steal my boyfriend? I let her but she was so insufferable but not as much as that particular boyfriend. He would have had me on a leash if he could get away with it,” she scoffed with a roll of her eyes. She began to enthusiastically chop the meat and vegetables. “Ugh. I couldn’t stand her but she always set the balls at the right height so I could only ignore her and get her mad at times.”

Now she was trying to distract you by telling you about another girl.

“Overall, the experience was worthwhile. You learn to deal with others and put up with some girls and are exposed to drama and pretentious attitudes but it was fun.” She smiled brightly at you. “I got to accidentally hit that setter which was acceptable because accidents to happen, you know? Especially when a volleyball is in your hands.” She winked at you and you couldn’t hide your smile. “Now go, so I can finish cooking. You’re distracting me.” She waved you off with the hand that was wielding the knife.

You saluted her and marched out of the room. Well, you didn’t march but you walked out stiffly to try and mimic the way your father strode. That got a laugh from your sister and an annoyed whine from Mieun for being jostled.

The next day at school, you thought about the past weekend. It was much more eventful than you were used to but it had been nice all the same. Just then Jimri walked up to you, “Mikyung!” her cheeks were a bright red. “I completely forgot we were supposed to meet this weekend! I’m sorry!”

You blinked at her slowly.

“I even forgot to get your number! I’m sorry! I hope you still don’t mind going shopping with me.” She was fidgeting, “It’s my first time taking a sport seriously and I don’t want to start off on the wrong foot so I would really appreciate if you can help me.”

You nodded at her, wondering if you should tell her you had forgotten about promising to meet up with her too.

“Okay good,” she whipped out her phone. “So what is your number?”

You looked at her phone, “Ummm.”

She leaned closer to you, “Yes?” she met your eyes briefly before looking down at her phone as her fingers swished and swiveled.

You cleared your throat, “I don’t have a phone.”

Your words made her freeze. Slowly, she looked up at you. “What?”

You eyed her before repeating yourself. As she continued to stare at you in shock, you shrugged your shoulders, “Really.”

Her eyes blinked back at you. “Really. You really don’t have a phone. You’re not just saying that to get rid of me?” Your eyebrows went up at that and she backtracked, “Sorry. I’m just taken aback.” She waved a hand at you. “I’m just really shocked about the fact you don’t have a phone.”

You hummed in reply.

“Wow.”

You nodded thinking about the reason you don’t have a phone. And Nunji was at the center like always.

She turned around and you both walked up the pathway to the front entrance of the school, “May I ask why you don’t have a phone?” she waved her expensive looking phone at you to illustrate her point. “I mean. I don’t even know how I would ever survive without my phone. It’s,” she paused and brought the piece of metal close to her heart, “It’s a part of me.”

You shrugged at her.

“Then how would you like to keep in contact? Letters? You don’t have a pager, do you?”

You scoffed at that and smiled at her so she would know you weren’t making fun of her.

She smiled tentatively back, “Then how?”

You took a deep breath in, “Emails.”

She nodded back, “Okay. That sounds doable since I can access my emails through my phone.” You both made it through the doors and down the hallway. “So how was your weekend?”

You yawned and then shrugged.

“My weekend was pretty normal. I visited my grandma for a while before my mom made me help her get the kimchi stuff together. And you know what? She didn’t even ask my brother to help. She just said that it was for the girls to do,” her scoff sounded a lot like yours, “like he even does anything except play his computer games.” She continued her rant all the way to the classroom. “You should never go into a boy’s room. It’s so disgusting, especially a brother’s room. “She walked you to your desk. “Okay,” her voice dropped the grouchiness and was back at its usual bright perkiness, “We’ll talk more later.” She smiled at you before going to her desk.

Y