Lu Han grabs my arm and takes me away from the Director.

"You shouldnt have anything to do with us anymore."He said in anger.

"LuHan....."

"This is goodbye,"he said, looking away.

"..."

Looking back at me,"Dont worry. We wont make trouble for you."

He smiles sadly, then starts to walk away.

I cant take this...

I cant watch you in anymore pain. Because I...

"Wait!!!"I said weakly.

I instinctively grab Lu Han's arm.

I fix my eyes on him.

But..............I cant find the words I need to say. Not even one....Why???

"What is it?"

Telling him now that I love him...is crazy, right?

After all of the chasing and suffering, how could I?

I stand still, head down.

Is it like what Lu Han says? Is saying goodbye the only option left. But, if I let go if this hand, I might really never see him again...

I bite down hard on my lip.

Lu Han looks at me with a kind look on his face.

"Would you smile for me?"

I look up at him in surprise.

"Show me your smile. Its my last chance..."

"Han....."

I felt my tears flowing down my cheeks.

Last chance..?

"Since you came to our hospital, I've probably never seen you really smile. But even then...you would sometimes show me a smile. It made me feel good."

Oh, Lu Han, why are you still so nice and caring towards me? I dont deserve it.

"I wanted to keep that smile from harm's way...Me, the man who made you suffer for so long....."

All I could do was to stare at his face. The face that I might not see anymore. The face that only show his smile to me. The face that I came to love. The face that I will miss.

"How ironic"

Lu Han gently releases my hand from his arm.

"Once the Director is dealt with, your quest for revenge is over, right?"

"..."

"I know that its not my place to say this, but...I'm begging you, let this be the end of it, okay?"

I wanted to promise him but if I did then its really over between us.

"Let it be over. From now on, I want you to live your life for yourself. So that you can find happiness...That's my only request."

"LuHan... For me. happiness is......."

I look at Lu Han imploringly.

But he only smiles faintly before once again turning away from me to walk away when he knew I could not do smile for him.

Wait!!!!!!!!

Dont go!!

Dont leave me!!

Clinging to this feeling that I cant bring myself to say, I sink to my knees.

Happiness for me is living my life together with you.....

Together with.......you, Lu Han...

But now that can never be.........

Lu Han's increasingly distant figure becomes blur from my tears.

The next day in the office....

"Um, what can I do for you?"

"Ah Jiyoon. I'm sorry for calling you in.I'm sure you didnt expect to be here again...But there's something I wanted you to see."

Kris handed me a file.

"It was on my desk when I arrived this morning."

I take the file and flip thru it. Inside was written detailed information regarding a number of patients.

"This is.. These are Han's patients..aren't they?"

Kris nodded."On every page, he'd also written the name of the doctor that he wants to take over that patients' care.

He indicated the doctors based on their particular strengths....

"Not only that he also completed the preparations for transferring those patients who are needed to be transferred."

"He did all that...,"I whispered.

Doing something that would upset the patients wouldnt have been very like of Lu Han. But even so, even at a time like this, he didnt forget about them....

Having to abandon them in the middle of treatment, must be difficult for Lu Han to bear.

I involuntarily glance at Lu Han's desk and see his thick notebook sitting there.

The notebook recordings of all the patients that he couldnt save.

I take the notebook and following the most recent entry. all of the blank pages had been torn out.

Why would he....

Could it be symbolic of there being nothing left to record...?

"Did Han...quit being a doctor?"I asked panicked.

"I imagine so,"Kris said sadly.

"Why?"

Not just this hospital, but his profession too.

"Why would he do that?"

"Is that what you wanted?"Kris answered.

"..I...."

Is it?

Is this really the revenge that I seek? The conclusion that I was hoping for?

I...I dont know anymore....what did I exactly want?

I dont even know what is right or wrong now....

"It looks like you didnt tell him to do it anyway."Kris said.

I didnt answer.

"Which means that Xiao Lu really wanted to protect you after all...."

Me?

"There were others ways that he could've done it and yet this path is the one he chose. A terrible choice for the hospital and himself. But if his objective was not to hurt you, its the best.

"He didnt want to make you a criminal. He also avoided exposing  you to the curiosity of the public which would have followed after bringing events of 12 years ago to light."

I clutched the notebook hard.

I'm sure its exactly as Kris says...

Lu Han gave his life to protect me.

"I knew that Xiao Lu was never able to forget what happened but I never would have guessed this is what would come of it."

Kris lets out a deep sigh.

I should have realized what Xiao Lu was thinking earlier. In hindsight,he behaved unnaturally many times..."

"If you did realize..would you have stopped him?"

"Thats a difficult question," Kris said before lost in thought.

"For years, I watched his sufferings and efforts from close by. Maybe its rude to say something like this to you but his suffering was extreme..no less than yours...If he can put himself thru this much pain..And if Xiao Lu would xhoose this as his path, then I dont think I would have stopped him.Not to mention that if he did all this for you,stopping him would not have been an option."

My tears dropped to the notebook that I was holding.

"What Xiao Lu did couldnt be done without some very strong feelings. He had obtained a position, a reputation. Ordinarily, people would cling to those things, if it was anybody else,they would have rewritten the past for their own convenience but not Xiao Lu...."

I sobbed hard as I listen to Kris.

"If I was in his position, I dont know if I could be so brave as to throw away everything just like that.....Anyway he was an extraordinary doctor. I cant stop myself from thinking what a great loss this has been."

"I am sorry..."

"I'm not angry with you nor do I think you have anything to apologize for...I'll be talking to the board later about the Director. Xiao Lu had sent detailed email to every member of the board explaining what took place 12 years back. The Director will inevitably be removed from his position."

"I see.."

I wiped my tears away....

He took care of that too....

"After thats over, we can get to rebuilding our poor,rickety hospital. I will be expected to take on the first lead on that. So Jiyoon, can I count on you?"

"What? But I was the one landed this hospital into hot soup. For me to stay here, I....."

Kris smiles. "And yet your name is here in his notes. Here, see for yourself."

Kris flips thru the pages of the file he'd shown me earlier.

Its there, just as Kris said. 'Physician: Dr Jeon Jiyoon.'

"Its what Xiao Lu wanted. He wants you to continue working here at this hospital."

My heart hurts.......

"Why....would he..."

"Clearly, he didnt want to make anymore of a mess in your life."

I looked down in regret.

"He went out of his way to warn me against telling anybody of your involvement,"Kris said with an encouragement smile. "So, you'll continue working here just as before. Yes?"

"I...."

"We need you here.. Of course Xiao Lu too..."

"What?" I said in surprise as I look at Kris.

He said Lu Han too...

"Could you bring him back?"

"Me?"

"Yes, that's right."

"But.."

"You're the only person who could do it."

"Is that what you think? I'm afraid I cant agree with you."

Lu Han said 'This is goodbye'...

He has no intention of seeing me again.

Plus, I'm the one who made him go thru all this.

I cant tell him, after everything, that I want him to come back.

"Yesterday, at the Director's home, Xiao Lu said that, for you,time has stood still for 12 years..."

I nodded.

"Its the same for him too. Xiao Lu renounced everything except his mission as a doctor. He doesnt smile or cry. He doesnt even get angry. Its a s though he's both alive and dead. Dont you think so? Its been hard for mr to watch him like that. So when I realized that he had feeling for you, I was kind of happy. As far as I'm aware, Xiao Lu never opened up to anyone other than you, ever since the incident. You're the only thing in the world that can breathe life into him. You're the one who can bring him back to the world of living."

"The only one..."I uttered.

The time I've spent with Lu Han comes back to me. One memory after next.

The surprise when we first met, his difficult personality.

Then trust, working together to get thru an operation, our first kiss...........

I've thought it so many times, 'If only we hadnt met this way...'

But I'm sure this was the only way for us to meet.

If my mother hadnt died, we would have lived our lives, never having anything to do with each other.

My grips tightens around Lu Han's notebook.

We were drawn toward this meeting, the only one possible for us...

Maybe my mother brought us together like this...

Maybe she did it for me...

I rushed out of the office.

I pressed the button for LuHan's apartment number but there was no response.

Where could he have gone to......?

I try calling him on my mobile.

Of course he's not picking up....

What's left. Where might LuHan go....

"Yoonie!"

"Lay, what are you doing here?"

"Kris, he told me to look for Dr Lu."

"And....?"

"Nothing..."

"I see..."

"He hasn't come back here ?"

I shake my head. "I've been calling him too but he's not picking up."

"Hmm, he's not at his usual bar or in the poppy field..."

"Poppy field.... Maybe, he's with my mother?"

"Huh?"

"LuHan brought poppies to my mother's grave every year.."

" So he goes to your mother to speak to her directly...."

"Yeah, I have a feeling that's where he is right now."

"Considering how well you knew him, I'm sure you're right."

"I'm gonna go."

"I'll take you to the airport. Come on my car is parked out front."

"Thanks."

"Well, could you get a ticket?"

"It looks like there's a flight in an hour," I answered as I check my mobile.

"Okay, I can make it."

"Lay glancs at his watch,then presses his foot down on the gas."

"Thanks a lot, Lay"

"Its fine, this is another important part of a business's man job."

"It is?"

"Besides, I'm really happy right now."

"You are?"

"I love that look on your face."

"What look?"

He chuckled. "It's this...super great, super determined face."

Ipouted. "Oh please "

"Its like you've broken free and are moving forward, or something..."

Moving forward...?

"So I wanna help. I hope you find him."

"Yeah."

I'm running out of breathe. But I see no incense, no poppies.

It doesn't look like anyone's been here....

The cemetery is silent. I plant myself down in front of the gravestone.

Not here huh.....

I'm at loss to what i should do. I have LuHan's notebook with me and I squeeze it tight to my chest.

Will I never see him again....?

A sense of loss suddenly wells up inside of me.

I desperately try to hold back my tears.

"Mom.... The person who did this to you admitted his guilt. and the director who covered it all up is probably being run out if the hospital at this very moment. So...did I do it? Your revenge, is this it...?"

I placed the notebook in front of the gravestone.

"LuHan always kept your records with him. He's the one who made the mistake but he's an amazing doctor. Thanks to him, a lot of people have been saved....but he's quitting now...I..I don't want him to. There are a lot of patients waiting for him and..... Hey mom, I...can forgive him now, right? He's paid for what he's done...."

The scent of poppies.....

I turn around....

""LuHan...."

"Jiyoon..."

I see those hands, holding a bouquet of poppies.

"Did you...hear?"

"Yeah," he answered softly. "Can I leave this for her?"

"Of course."

LuHan places the flowers in front of my mother's grave and then quietly puts his palms together in prayer.

He then slowly turns around to look at me.

"I give her a proper apology."

"Oh..."

"I made her wait twelve years though.... Did you come here to  her what happened too?"

"No...I thought you might be here..."

He was surprised. "You...were waiting for me?"

I nodded in answer.

"Why?"

I take the notebook from my hand and hold it out to him. "To return this "

"This..?"

"Yes, its important to you." 

"But I don't need it anymore."

"Because you quit being a doctor?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"To settle things in my own way.."

"And for whose sake?"

"But..."

"What if I tell to you that neither I nor my mother want this. What if I tell you that continuing to be a doctor is the best way to make things right?"

"You said it yourself. No matter how many lives I saved, the crime that I committed wont be erased."

"Yes,"I admitted. "I did say that. And I still feel that way. So, I want you to continue being a doctor, for your future. Not to atone for the past."

"Jiyoon...""

"I'm going to keep my mind on the future too, so I want you to do the same. Instead of looking back. I want to keep walking for......with you."

I wrap my arms around LuHan.

"I don't want to see you suffering anymore. I'm tired of lying to myself and feeling all this pain....I love you.."

LuHan hugs me back tightly. 

"I love you too...."

I buried my face in his chest. 

"I'm the one who made you suffer like this but now I want to support you....so....please...."

"Don't say anything else,"he said softly.

I wanted to protest as I look up to his face but my words was intercepted by LuHan's kiss.

Tears run down my cheeks.

Mom, I can be happy, right?

With this person....

We hold each other, surrounded by the scent of poppies.

We got out of the taxi, right in front of the hospital.

"We're back,"I said happily.

"Xiao Lu, we've been expecting you."

"Welcome back Hyung, Jiyoon,"Sehun said, smiling.

"Xiao Lu.."Nurse Oh calls out.

"Everybody..."Lu Han said, touched.

"It's okay already.We dont need any of that depressing stuff. Okay?"Eunjung said coolly.

"Hyung, she's right. We dont need you to say anything else. We just need that gorgeous hands of yours."

Nurse Oh hit her son on the back of his head. "What a thing to say!"

"Ouch! Mum!!!"

Lu Han look at all the people around him."Thanks everyone."

"Sorry to cut this short but Xiao Lu, there's a mountain of work awaiting us. Could you lend a hand?" Kris asked.

Lu Han smiled. "Of course."

"Good..Okay everyone. Go check on your patients."

Everyone did as Kris instructed.

I'm following right behind when I noticed Lu Han looking up at the night sky, murmuring something.

"The sky in Busan...it must be much more beautiful than it is here.."

"Yes, it is,"I agreed.

He held out his hand to me and I linked my fingers to his.

We smiled at each other and enters the hospital together.

The End..........

Stay tuned for the epilogue and second route.

Thanks for reading..