September soon passed and they even passed Chanhee’s birthday. They held a private party for the group in Chanhee’s family apartment in Gangnam. That party in a chilly October was the last time Sina sat close next to Niel.

It was an unforgettable night for Sina—and maybe for Yoomi and Yuri too. It was supposed to be Chanhee’s party but Niel sang a sweet song for her—or so she thought as he kept glancing at her, with Byunghun in the piano. Byunghun’s piano playing reminded Yuri of their first meeting in the music room and that instantly made her fall for him. Yuri, who loved singing, hummed along and actually joined the song.

As Yuri reminisced her past, Sina couldn’t take off her eyes of Niel. She realized that everytime he sang, he’ll change into another person, who was serious and intimidating—(he usually was a noisy boy who loved playing pranks with Changhyun). She actually had to look away every time Niel’s eyes met hers. She felt her heart might jump out and stopped breathing if she kept doing eye contact.

They completely forgot the birthday boy as the night passed by Minsoo rapped a song written by Byunghun for Yoomi. Chanhee protested, saying that Byunghun should have written a song for him, not for Yoomi.

But that beautiful day soon passed when she realized that Niel’s been avoiding her. It wasn’t that obvious, but he always avoided her. She rarely met him joining their group after dance practice, he always had a reason not to come. She never saw him in the library again—something which he did once a week. He even stopped hanging out with duo maknae—who was still following Sina at lunch time. She caught him running away from her whenever they were about to meet in the hallway.

This hurt Sina. No one told her what she did wrong and Niel just suddenly avoided her. Now that she was aware that she liked him, how could she ignore this?

Maybe Niel was aware of her feeling and bothered by it? She remembered Byunghun who used to ignore Yuri because he knew she loved him. Maybe Niel felt the same thing. As it got into her head, she became a bit temperamental. Moreover, the black mail and bullying kept coming at her. She felt like screaming and punching something every day.

She even asked Yoomi and Yuri if they knew something about this. But they knew nothing as well. Niel always acted normal around them. They told her maybe he had some personal problems but they promised to ask him. Niel—of course—wouldn’t say anything.

She still tried to talk to Niel to ask what’s wrong, but she never got the right timing. Until one day, a wet October as rain kept falling from the sky, she accidentally met Niel in a secluded hallway near the teacher’s office.

“Did I do something wrong to you? Why did you avoid me?” Sina demanded.

Niel’s face turned pale. He never expected to actually explain everything to Sina. “I didn’t avoid you, noona…”

“Niel, don’t you try to lie to me. You’re avoiding me.”

He knew there’s no point of lying. But he couldn’t able to bring the subject of bullying.

“Uuhh…. There’s someone I like in the class said she’s been seeing me with you a lot noona…”

Niel’s words blew Sina so hard. Someone he liked? In the class? It meant…. Her heart broke to pieces. She could feel pain tingling in her palms and she had to squeeze the paper bag she was holding. Her eyes felt hot and she felt a big lump in her neck.

“I’m sorry, noona. We have to… stay away a bit….”

Sina squeezed the paper bag harder. Her heart ached. So, she just misunderstood all sweet things he did for her? She did her best to hold her tears. She couldn’t cry here. Not in front of him. She couldn’t even lift her acem scared that Niel might see her tears, but she still looked up and smiled.

“Oh, I understand. You should have told me. Good luck, then,” she said, couldn’t stop tremble in her voice.

Before Niel could response, she spun on her heels and walked quickly to her class. What’s the point now? This thing… she should have just stuck to her normal life. Why did she make something like this too? Tears begin falling off her eyes. Every pain and sadness flowed along the tears. She had been holding back now. The black mail, the bullying, and now… heart-broken. What a great autumn! She thought.

She should have known her position. She misunderstood those sweet things Niel did to her. How could she be brave enough to think that Niel might like her? Someone older than him…. The more she thought of reasons not to like someone like her, the more it pained her.

Suddenly, someone splashed water at her. She froze, mouth wide open in shock. In front of her, stood three girls from the same year as her, carrying a bucket. They were the same person who tried to push her off the stairs just the other day.

Sina could feel patience beginning to leave her. Unable to hold it back, she screamed.

“YA!!! MWOHAE!?”

“Dirty woman should be cleansed,” the girl easily answered.

That’s it. Sina threw her first at the girl, just as soon as the girl was about to open to speak again.

The commotion spread around the school. Many students came to watch what really happened. Sina thought this could be a good show if only she wasn’t the one who they were watching at. When the groups arrived in the ‘crime scene’, Sina—who was drenched—and the other girls already lined up in front of the teacher. Sina practically had no wound, and looked satisfied. While the other girls… let’s say, they were lucky enough Sina stopped hitting right after the screamed hysterically.

“Moon Sina ssi, why are you doing this? You used to be a good and dedicated student. Suddenly this?” the teacher demanded, looking straight at Sina.

“Jweisonghamnida, sonsaengnim. But they did terrible things to me. I tried to talk to them to stop bully me. But they never listen.”

“Bully? They bullied you?” the teacher turned to the girls. “Is that true?”

“We don’t bully her,” one of the girls quickly answered.

Sina glared at her, while the teacher was unconvinced. She didn’t have any proof for this. If they were going to be dragged to the teacher’s office, she would be in trouble too. The teacher might call her parents, well, she practically said nothing about bullying to her parents.

“Sonsaengnim,” suddenly Jonghyun spoke up. He stepped from the crowd. “I want to testify for that. I saw them bully Sina sunbae.”

Sina looked at Jonghyun with gratefulness. She would hug him if she could right now. She could sense a tint of annoyance in Jonghyun’s voice. She imagined it would be good if this guy taught these girls one thing or two about violence.

It didn’t take long before the teacher interrogated Jonghyun and decided to take the girls to the teacher’s office for further investigation. The teacher let Sina walked away because of her reputation among the teachers at school.

As soon as the teacher walked away, the crowd dispersed—some of them mumbled with their friends, talking about what just happened. They left Sina with her group.

Changhyun quickly approached Sina and held her hands. “Noona really okay? See! I’m right! I’m right about this!” He swayed Sina’s hand back and forth and gave her a hug.

“I’m wet, Changhyun ah,” Sina quietly said, pulled away from Changhyun’s arm. She walked to Jonghyun and gave him a slight hug. “Thank you very much, Jonghyun ah.”

Jonghyun ruffled Sina’s hair and smiled—a mischievous smile he always had. “I’ll do anything for you, noona.”

“Sina ya! Why didn’t you tell us about this?!” scolded Yoomi.

“I… didn’t want to burden you guys with this…”

“You’re always like this. Doing things on your own, keeping things inside. Who do you think we are?! Aren’t we your friends??” added Yuri, pushing Sina’s forehead with her index finger.

“Mianhae… I thought I can handle this…”

“Oh, and did you?” Yuri replied sarcastically.

“I did. By punching someone’s nose,” Sina replied innocently.

They laughed at it. Jonghyun touched Sina’s shoulder to have her attention. “You really punched them in the face?”

“Not them, only one of them,” corrected her. “They started screaming hysterically.”

Minsoo scoffed. “You’re really something, Sina ya.”

“I didn’t do slaps,” Sina replied. “They’re messing with a wrong person in a wrong time. And I had enough.”

Byunghun and Chanhee laughed. “We can imagine that. You always had short temper at times.”

“I didn’t!” protested Sina. She’s not the one who could be angry easily. But with the right trigger, she could.

“Yes, you are, Sina,” Yoomi suddenly said, handing a towel for her to dry her clothes.

“Just when did I…” Sina started.

“Like right now?” Yuri cut her off.

Sina was about to reply but she realized her friends was just trying to cheer her up, so she laughed along.

“Oh, noona, what is that?” Changhyun pointed wet paper bag Sina was holding.

Sina looked at the paper bag pitifully. She suddenly remembered what just happened between her and Niel. She looked up and saw Niel standing behind the groups, confused and awkward. But he kept looking at her with those big eyes, as gentle as he always was.

Things happened. There’s no point of keeping this, and she definitely wouldn’t wear this thing. It would only remind her of her broken-heart. What’s the point? Sina suddenly walked to Niel, holding the paper bag close to her heart. This might be the end of it. And she would try to forget her first love. Huh, stupid first love. She shouldn’t have fallen in love in the first place, knowing that it would be this hard to literally fall.

Trying real hard not to shed tears, Sina threw the paper bag at Niel, and said—trembling, although she tried not to, “I hate you.”

Then she walked away from them. This surprised all of them. They didn’t expect Sina to say those things to Niel. They knew that Sina might already fall for him, although they weren’t sure of it. Changhyun looked at Niel and Sina back and forth, didn’t understand what just happened.

“Noona!” he called. “Hyung! What the hell are you doing?! You have to run after her!” he exclaimed.

But Niel froze. Sina’s ‘I hate you’ still sent a shock to him. Sina hated him. What should he do now??

“Let her be. Give her some time alone,” Byunghun said.

“Niel, open it,” said Yoomi. She and Yuri already knew what’s inside the paper bag.

Niel obediently opened the paper bag and pulled out something maroon-reddish from it. A scarf, red in color, and handmade. It was handmade.

“She made that for weeks,” Yuri explained. “It was before you starting to ignore her. And she was really hurt when you did, thinking that you hated her or something. She’s not as ignorant as she used to be to you. Want to know why? Do you want to make me dictate you everything about her?” A tone of annoyance could be heard.

“But I don’t hate her. It hurt me too. Sina noona is… she…. It pained me not talking to her, seeing her smile, laugh with her. But seeing her suffer… it pained me more…” Niel quietly said. The point he was trying to say was, she wasn’t the only one who was hurting.

The boys exchanged glances. This was a new side of Niel they didn’t know. He used to be a prankster, a kid, loved to mess around, and Changhyun’s partner-in-crime. But what they saw today, he was growing up. He wasn’t a noisy kid they used to scold anymore.

“What should I do…?” Niel whined, looking at his sunbaes.

These two were too thick-headed to see each other’s feelings. They tried not to hurt each other, but in the end, their attempt only made things worse.

Yoomi sighed. She was trying to stay out of their problems, but now she had to do something. Before these two starting to hurt each other again, without knowing it.