Firstly, let me apologize for the (kinda) long hiatus.

Secondly, let me *bows* thank all of you for your utmost patience and loyalty :3

I'll Follow You Into The Dark - Death Cab For Cutie

It was pitch dark. It was total darkness. 

Nothing I've ever felt before.

I haven't opened my eyes yet but I just knew that this is... different.

Should I open my eyes?

Should I just ignore this dream and wait for the time to wake up?

Should I open my eyes?

How did I know it's different? It's the Feeling. The Hunch. 

Imagine you woke up in the morning. You have not yet opened your eyes. It's dark. But, somehow, you can feel the light trying to seep through your closed eyelids. You feel the gentle warmth from the sunlight on your skin. You feel your heavy bones resting lazily on the comfy mattress. You refused to open your eyes but you knew you have to wake up but "Not yet", you told yourself.

Remember that feeling?

This time, I was feeling something completely new. 

The darkness, it somehow engulfed me. The cold from the darkness trickled on my skin. My heavy bones were floating. 

Slowly, hesitantly, I opened my eyes. 

It's.... dark. Pitch black.

I dragged my hand into my vision.

I could see it.

What is this... void?

I sprung up and just sit and stare at the whole mind boggling view.

"Am I dead?"

I was trying to recall what happened as I groggily tried to stand on my feet. I looked around, squinting my eyes to find any trace of anything at all.

Just then, I saw a faint white light from afar.

"That looks like a... door?"

According to all the movies I've watched and stories I've read, it's always either "Go INTO the light" or "DON'T follow the light". But well, it's not like i have any other choices. So, i started walking towards the door. But my mind was still trying to remember how i got myself into this.

Step by step, I was getting closer and closer to the door until i finally stopped in front of it.

The lights were blinding for a moment or two. But then, I saw It.

"It's Heaven.

I AM TRULY DEAD!"

Well, what was I expecting, right? But, heaven is the ultimate thing a mere human like me could ever ask for.

"Hel- No. HEAVEN YEAH! Ready or not, here I come."

Just as I was about to step through that door, I finally remembered...

The heavy rain.

The cold.

The thousands of raindrops hitting against my skin.

Your arms tightly wrapped around my waist.

The slowness and cragginess of the scooter ride. 

And then, there was

The blinding light.

The screeching tyres.

The loud, deafening bang.

The black out.

The raindrops bursting against the road.

You.

"Jessica"

I turned back, looking into the void.

And from the silence, slowly, I started to hear the faint sounds of noises. Raindrops. Sirens. Voices. Engines.

Then, I saw another door opened. But there was no bright glorious light shining from it.

There was just the night skies. 

I looked back to catch a long glimpse of heaven.

I sighed.

"Heaven can wait."

I ran through the void again and straight through that door. Straight into conciousness.

I felt pain, jolting through every inch of my body. The raindrops hitting my face. The air stucked at my throat. Everything was pure HELL.

I should've gone to Heaven.

And I out.

Again.

- - - - - - - - -

Should I open my eyes now?

I feel the light trying to sip through my eyelids. Beeping sounds are starting to fill my brain. My heavy bones are lying lazily on the mattress. Numbness binds my body into a halt. And the pain. 

Urgh. The pain.

Should I open my eyes?

"Sooyoung." 

Jessica?

"Please be okay. I need you. I'm sorry."

"Je.. Jessica?" I croaked and I finally opened my eyes.

"Sooyoung! Oh my God!" Tears started to roll down her cheek. Her eyes were glistening.

I carved a smile on my face as she kissed my forehead.

But, right after, i felt something missing. 

I looked down.

Jessica started crying and apologizing to me.

"Sooyoung, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's all my fault." She kept on mumbing and crying all at the same time.

"Jessica." I cupped her cheek. "I'm okay. It's okay."

"But your legs--" 

"Sica, listen to me! I don't care, okay? I have you. That's enough."

I kissed her on her lips.

And she replied the kiss with the same passion. And a pinch of guilt.

I looked into her eyes. And asked her,

"Do you know how much I love you?"

 She shook her head with pout on her face.

I kissed her lips and said,

"I love you so much that I ditched heaven just to be with you."

"Cheesy."

"As cheesy as it might sound, you won't know how real that is."

I'm so sorry.

For the story.

For the abrupt ending.

For the hiatus.

For everything

I want to thank all of you.

For existing.

Please comment. I need it :)

*bows*

p/s my girlfriend is okay now. well, she's doing her chemos now.

thank you for your prayers and support!

#prayformygirlfriend #prayformh370