When Seunghyun left Daesung’s place he made sure that Daesung was going to go to school every day unless it was an emergency. Without delay he headed back to Youngbae’s place; not wanting to worry him any more than he has been.

Seunghyun knocked on Youngbae’s door and waited for him to let him.

Youngbae opened the door with a look of relief, “Good you came back. You know since I’m not going to be letting you leave you can just walk in whenever you want if the door is unlocked.”

“I didn’t want to startle you or anything so I decided to knock.”

Youngbae shrugged his shoulders and landed on the couch. “I’ve never had a roommate before; what do you want to do?”

“I don’t know what roommates do. Normally I’m by myself at home; in my room.”

“Oh what do you do?”

Seunghyun looked at his hands, “It depends on what kind of day I’m having. If it’s a good day nothing unusual, and if it’s a bad day…

“If it’s a bad day what?” Youngbae looked at him curiously.

Seunghyun’s voice got quiet, “If it’s a bad day I usually find something to try and make me happy.”

Youngbae pressed further, “Like what?”

“Well, I sometimes listen to music, or just sit and think of things that are nice, or I might cut.” He said the sentence slowly and nervously.

“You what? Roll up your sleeves.”

Seunghyun rolled up his sleeves; he wondered why everyone wanted to boss him around today.

“There’s cuts all up and down both of your arms. How many times have you done this?”

“I told you, when I’m having a bad day.”

Youngbae got up and went to the kitchen. He didn’t look at Seunghyun when he walked passed. About ten minutes later he came out with a black plastic bag then walked down the hallway to his bathroom. He came out and looked around the room then grabbed some scissors that were on the coffee table.

Seunghyun had had enough of just standing around and watching Youngbae move around the house. “What are you doing?”

“I’m taking out all the sharp things in the house. For now on you’re staying with me indefinitely and we’re going to be eating with everything plastic. I’m going to buy safety scissors and I guess I’m going to have to stop shaving here.”

“Don’t you think that’s a bit extreme? I can’t stay here forever, I actually do live with someone.”

Youngbae was flabbergasted, “Who do you live with? Do they know about anything that’s been going on with you?”

“I live with my mom, and no, she doesn’t know anything about me.”

“Do I have to tell her?” Youngbae crossed his arms and awaited an answer.

Seunghyun gave him a horrified expression, “Please don’t tell her, she doesn’t need to know anything about me, please. Taeyang there is a reason why she doesn’t know, so let’s just keep this to ourselves. Okay?”

“Then who’s going to watch over you? Your mother can’t because she thinks nothing to watch over and I can’t because you won’t tell your mother, so where does that leave us?”

“Me going home and resuming my life the way it is.” Seunghyun looked at him hopefully.

“Or you staying here. If your mom calls then you’ll just have to tell her that you can’t come back; or the truth and why you’re staying here.” Youngbae rubbed his forehead, “Last time I might have let you go home, but now I realize that that can’t be an option. I’m not going to let you turn into another Daesung especially if I have you here with me right now.”

“Do I not have any other options?”

“It’s either tell your mother or stay with me.”

“Then I guess I’m not leaving.” He kicked the floor defeatedly. “What did you mean by another Daesung? What happened to him?”

Youngbae shook his head, “He’d have to tell you himself, but I don’t think that it’d be easy to get it out of him; at all.”

“Then I guess I’ll have to get it out of him in any way I can.”

“How?”

“Daesung is the first friend that I have ever had in my life. All I ever wanted was to show someone the true side of me, and let me do that. Yeah he may be a little mean and he does scare me sometimes but I do owe him. So when it comes down to it I will try anything in my power to get him to open up to me because in the end it’ll help the both of us. In any words I don’t know how I’m going to get him to tell me.”

“You could have said I don’t know. I didn’t need that whole speech.”

Seunghyun smiled, “I know, but I thought that you should know too. He’s also got me smiling again; even if it’s only a little.”

“I don’t understand how you can smile and want to kill yourself. How do you expect to do all things if you’re gone from the world?”

“When I get to the point in my life that I think I would be better off dead, the more selfish part of me comes out. At those times I’m not thinking about anyone else in my life. I guess you could say that that’s why I cut it’s like I can experience dying without actually doing it. Except sometimes I think it isn’t enough and that’s when I might actually forget why I want to live, and just end it.”

Youngbae touched Seunghyun’s shoulder, “Then I guess it’s my job to help you remember when you get like that. I’ll help you with yourself so you can go on to help Daesung in the end. Is that okay with you?”

“I guess we both have a lot work to do then.”

“Yeah-

Youngbae looked at his phone; there was a new message from Jiyong on it. He read it and sighed heavily.

 “Is there something wrong?”

“Do you mind if we have company?”

“No, why, when are they coming.”

“Uh now.”                                                                                                                                                                                                                

As he said that a knock on the door startled them both.

“I think your company is here.”

Youngbae begrudgingly walked to the door and opened it. A nervous Jiyong and a silent Seungri walked into the house. It was quiet when they saw Seunghyun there. All four of them stood awkwardly in the living room while staring at them.

Youngbae was the first to speak, “G Dragon, Seungri, what brings you here?”

Jiyong looked at Youngbae incredulously, “What are we doing here? What is he doing here?”

“I don’t believe you’re in the position to be asking questions; don’t you think.”

Jiyong made a loud swallow, “Never mind, we both came here to make amends.” He held up a present and gave it to Youngbae.

Youngbae looked at the present and put it on the couch; he didn’t bother to open it. “Make amends? Why so late?”

“I didn’t think that I had to till Daesung told me you were quite upset.” He looked over at Seunghyun, “He was also there.”

“G Dragon do you think a present is going to set things straight? Go over there and sit on the couch.” He looked at Seungri, “You too.”

Seunghyun stared at the three of them; he wondered if he should leave the room or stay and listen. He chose both; Seunghyun backed up into the kitchen and stayed there quietly. No one either seemed to notice or didn’t care.

“G Dragon, I’ve tried my hardest to cover things up but there are rumors going around. Fortunately your name hasn’t gotten out there and neither has Daesung’s, but it’s still pretty hard for me in the end.” He narrowed his eyes at Seungri, “Someone tried to get you and Daesung into trouble and unfortunately since people know you’re associated with me I’m in it too. Let’s face it, if you don’t become more careful there might not be a next time to cover things up.”

Jiyong scowled, “People can’t find out about me being…not heteroual. They’ll kill me, they won’t show me any mercy. I always regret having to do this because of my uality; what I never understood was why people hate it so much. I hate having to sneak around and do things in the closet. I don’t get why I have to hide what I am just to fit in. It isn’t fair!”

Youngbae held up his hands, “I know it isn’t, but you and I both know that we can’t change how people think. Now for the time being, maybe you should try toning your wardrobe down a bit.”

“My what?”

“Your wardrobe; turn it down.”

Jiyong glared at the ground angrily, he was mad at the world for not letting him be him. He didn’t want to have to bend to anyone’s rules. “I’ll try, but my hair is a completely different story.”

Youngbae nodded, “Fine, now what about Seungri?”

Jiyong looked back at Seungri, “What about him?”

Youngbae gave Seungri an inquisitive look, “I don’t trust him.”

Jiyong made a gesture toward Seungri and pointed to Youngbae.

Seungri opened his mouth to speak, “You can trust me because I wouldn’t do anything to Ji- G Dragon. I promise you that; I sort of look up to him.”

“Did you practice that in your head before speaking? Listen Seungri, I don’t trust the quiet conniving types so I’ll be watching you ok?”

Seungri nodded his head in assurance, “You won’t hear anything from me.”

“That’s what I worry about.”

Jiyong looked over at the door, “Are we settled now? Can we go?”

“I guess, just don’t let me hear anything else from you guys.”

Jiyong got up to leave. He walked out the door and down the sidewalk. “You know Seungri, one day we won’t have to put with this kind of stuff. It’d be nice to be who you want to be without people judging us, right?”

“Yeah, that would be nice.”

“I thought you’d say that, you agree with everything I say.”

Seungri didn’t say anything; he just nodded his head and kept on walking. In his mind what he really wanted was to live up to his name. He wanted people to know why his name was victory, and soon that was going to happen; even if he had to take some people down in the end.

Seunghyun walked out of the kitchen and sat on the couch next to Youngbae.

“Go ahead, I know you have questions.”

Seunghyun sighed with relief he was glad he didn’t have to initiate the question asking. “What’s up with the nick names?”

Youngbae didn’t think that that was the question Seunghyun was going to ask, but he welcomed it anyways. “The nick names are supposed to mean something to you personally. There also supposed to keep your identity safe, though people already know me by my real name. It gets really annoying when people call me Youngbae. It’s Taeyang; is that so hard to remember? Daesung does it all the time I think he does it just to spite me.”

Seunghyun raised an eyebrow, “I didn’t ask for all that. You could have stopped at the first sentence.”

“Funny, it sort of sounds like you’re mocking me.”

Seunghyun put his hand on his heart, “Little ole me? Why I would never.”

“Don’t be a jerk or I’ll make you eat with only plastic spoons for the rest of your life.”

“You wouldn’t even let me have a spork?”

“Nope.”

“Then I guess I’ll stop, if only because I value my sporks man.”

Youngbae tried to keep himself from laughing at Seunghyun’s absurdness but failed miserably. “You really know how to brighten a mood.”

Seunghyun winked, “You haven’t seen anything yet.”

“I can’t wait.”