CHAPTER I

SULLI'S POV

I heard his key in the door and sat up straight on the couch, my heart suddenly beats faster.

He’s back a day earlier than I’d expected, and of course he hadn’t called; he never called me when he’s gone on a trip or if they have any concert tour, even its out or within the country, because that would be too much like acknowledging a relationship. Well, come to think of it, he NEVER called me at all.

We don’t have relationship in the first place. It’s an arrangement, just like what we agreed last year.

I didn’t jump up to run into his arms; that, too, was something that would make him uncomfortable.

By now, I know the man I love very well.

He couldn’t accept anything that resembles caring from me because as what he would always say, we don’t have relationship.

That was the reason he was always saying when I always attempt to do something for him.

He’s very careful never to appear rushing to see me; he call me with an endearment only if we are in bed; never gave me a fleeting, casual caresses, never whispered love words even during the most intense love making.

What he said to me in bed were always words of ual need and excitement.

I love making love with him.

Not only because of the pleasure that I can get but, because that’s the only time that I could give him all the affection that he would never accept outside of the bed.

I sleep each night –( that is whenever he appears in condo, which is very unpredictable because he will just go here if he’s really stressed out from practice or from shows and he needs an outlet.) – in his arms, and if for some reason I would move away from him during the night, he would suddenly woke up and he would reach for me, settling me against him once more.

But when morning comes?

He would withdraw back to his own shell.

Like nothing had happen.

I seem to be talking to an air.

So I forced myself to sit still, and continued arranging my schedule for this week.

It wasn’t until I heard the thump of his shoes hitting the floor and he toss his car keys on the coffee table, that’s when I allowed myself to look up at him.

My heart leaped at first sight of him. I missed him.

When was the last time that he’s here?

3 weeks ago?

It’s not that new, because he was really a busy person.

Why? Simply because he’s very famous, when I say very famous, I mean he’s well known inside and outside of South Korea, he’s the main rapper and visual of the famous Contemporary band SHINee. He’s a model and an actor too, sometimes he would be a guest MC in different shows, and according to my bestfriend Luna, who happens to be their stylist,  SHINee as of now is busy with their Japan Arena Tour, and supposedly they will be back here in korea tomorrow night, but it seems that their flight was moved earlier because he is here now.

And I really don’t expect him to be here every week or everyday, sometimes he will be here after a month and sometimes after two months. Well I never made a fuss about it, since I’m nothing to him, and we’re not in a relationship.

He look tired; there were dark circles under his eyes.

He took off his jacket and tossed it in the sofa, and while he’s doing that, I went to the small bar and poured myself a wine.

Don’t ask me why I didn’t poured wine or ask him if wanted it, because he’d definitely won’t take it, remember? He don’t want affection.

He sat down on one of the bar stool, and poured wine for his self.

I stepped back, not wanting to crowd him, but my eyes lingered on his wide, muscled chest, and my body began to quicken in that familiar way.

“Did the tour go well” I asked. It’s always the safest topic that I know he will answer. Other than that? Don’t hope he will answer it.

I guess he will not be surprised where I knew about it, come on. It’s a small world for the both of us. We cant avoid to see everyday since I have a job line with his. Their group is very famous and even a very small news about them is sure to be the headline. And of course he knows that I’m Luna’s bestfried, luna who until now, didn’t knew anything about our set up.

“Yeah. More exhausting than I’ve expected” he finished his drink with a quick toss then set it aside and he then put his hands on my waist.

I tilted my head back in my surprise.

What is he doing?

Usually he would follow a pattern.

He would usually take a shower first, then he would watched news, or read a newspaper. But now?

“Is there something wrong?” I asked him even though I know he will not tell me the reason, or if theres really something wrong with him.

He gave a harsh, strained laugh. “No, nothing’s wrong. It was a of a trip, that’s all” even though he’s talking he was moving us towards the bedroom.

Once we were in, he turned me around and began undressing me, pulling out my clothes in his impatience.

He wrapped his arms tightly around my waist, almost crushing me. His shirt buttons dug into my s, I squirmed a little.

How does he do this?

He can easily arouse me with just a swift move.

I tugged at his shirt. “Don’t you think you’d be better off without this?” I whispered. “and this?” I slipped my hands between us and began unbuckling his belt.

He was breathing harder, his body heat burning me even through his clothes.

Instead of stepping back so I could undress him, he tightened his arms around me and lifted me off my feet, and then he carried me to the bed.

He let himself fall backward, with me still in his arms, then rolled so that I’m beneath him.

I groaned when he used his muscular thigh to spread my legs, and his hips settled into the notch he’d just made.

“Sulli....” he caught my face between his hands and ground his mouth against mine, then reached down between our bodies to open his pants.

Is it just me? Or he’s really in frenzy?

I sensed his desperate need of me, and I held myself still for him.

He entered me with a heavy surge that made me arch off my bed.

I wasn’t ready and his entry was painful, but I pushed my fingers into his hair and clasped his head, trying to give him what comfort I could give, though I don’t really know what is wrong.

Once he’s inside me, however, the desperation faded from his eyes, and I felt the tension in his muscles subside.

He sank against me with a muted groan of pleasure, his heavy weight crushing me into the bed.

After a moment, he propped himself on his elbows. “I’m sorry” he whispered breathless, “I didn’t mean to hurt you”.

I give him a gentle smile and smoothed his styled brown hair. “I know”, I replied applying pressure to his head to force him within kissing range.

My body has accustomed itself to him, and the pain of his rough entry was gone, leaving only the most incandescent joy of making love with him.

I had never said it aloud, but my body says it and it has always echoed in my mind. I love you. I said the inner words again as he began moving.

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I woke up with the sound of the shower running. It’s already dawn and it only means one thing.

The shower has stopped and after a minute, he walked back into the room , rubbing a towel on his wet hair.

A small frown pulled his brows downward when he saw that I’m still in bed. “are you sure I didn’t hurt you?”

You did. But I cant tell him that. He will be just guilty.

I shook my head and he looked relieved. “are you going?” I asked him

He nooded as he wear his pants.

“Coffee?” I offered, though I know he will say no.

“No” he’s now undressing and he also finished wearing his shoes.

“Right, so I guess, see you later”

“You’re going to the company later?” he asked me, I know he doesn’t care at all because we’re just casual when we happened to bumped each other outside. No one even knows that we have this set up, just the two of us, not even our closest friends.

“Yep, work as usual” I answered his question

“Ok, bye” see? I told you, he doesn’t care. He went out of my condo. Just like that.

Yes, you’re right.

I am Choi Jinri. A Successful fashion designer and a business woman in South Korea.

But that guy is Choi Minho, the y and Charismatic Main rapper of the very well known Contemporary band SHINee is my sweetest downfall.

And worst of all, I am more than sure that there are only three things that he knows about me: My job. My nickname, Sulli and Last and Most importantly, my ADDRESS.

I unconsciously looked at the calendar in my side-table.

I let out a deep sigh as the memories of how we met and ended up in this arrangement came back to me as if it was just yesterday.

It’s exactly one year since that incident happened.

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