There are always two sides to everything.

When we crash and burn into the pavement, who am I supposed to blame?

“Suho-yah! Your client is waiting!”

“Yes, sir! Coming~”

Junmyun closed the door to his locker with a click. Something didn’t feel right. The air was suffocating, thick with poison-tipped nicotine and sensual touches that were indignant to the glamorous night life of Seoul. Junmyun should be used to it by now, but tonight, cladded in leather pants and tight black shirt, the man wanted a break from it all.

“What’s with all these buttons. Geez. Dress better and you can actually get more tips.”

His boss frowned as he worked the buttons on Junmyun’s shirt loose. With his milky neck exposed, Junmyun desperately wanted his normal job back. Even though the clients did nothing but keep him company, either for a small chat or someone to drink with, Junmyun wasn’t so proud of this choice of occupation. He was a father of a seventeen-year-old kid who could barely take care of himself. It just didn’t feel right to go messing with other people’s marriages with his pretty face and pretty smile.

Oh right, like how he did to Wu Yi Fan’s marriage eighteen years ago.

“Neh...I understand.”

Junmyun immediately coughed when he stepped into the room. The smoke was making him uncomfortable. A pair of businessmen were enjoying their night with incessant laughter and two rs by their side. It was ominously dark. Junmyun cringed while putting down the bottles of soju on the table, just as one of the men grabbed his wrist forcefully.

“I see you’ve met Luhan,” the man smirked, the familiar voice that Junmyun was dreaded to hear. It didn’t take long for him to back away and head for the exit. The guards blocked his way before he could get out.

“Y-You followed me??” Junmyun was facing Yifan again, fear evident in his eyes. He was shaking. There was no escape. He’s trapped, in Wu Yi Fan’s schemes again, after all those years, and karma kept coming back.

“Actually, my men followed you,” Yifan cornered Junmyun into the far wall, towering a good head above the younger man. There was no kindness in his eyes. “So...I raised him well, didn’t I?”

Junmyun stammered as Yifan took his tiny wrists in his hands, pinning them above his head, “Y...You let him drink alcohol when he’s just a child...You spoilt him. You showered him with money, letting him go to clubs when he should be at home doing homework. He cusses and he has the attitude that makes people wonder who the hell teaches him such outrageous things. And you expect it to be good parenting?”

But Yifan said, “You can’t expect a child to grow well without his mother.”

And Junmyun’s heart stopped. At the end of the day, it was always his fault. He chose to leave. He didn’t protect Luhan well enough. He wanted Luhan to have a better life, yet he broke the younger’s heart in the process.

“Move in with me. It will be better for you, for the both of you. Do this for Luhan, he needs you. He’s been looking for you for years. Heck! Do this for Shixun. I can give him things that you can’t. I can treat his asthma, give him a better education, give him a home...” Yifan whispered sweetly in his ears, trying to convince him with honey-dripping words of a better future.

Junmyun didn’t buy it. Not a single word.

“Do you think that that’s what we want? We only want you to get out of our lives,” Junmyun spat before pushing Yifan away. He was so weak to get out of the older’s powerful grip.

“Shixun doesn’t know, does he!” Yifan screamed. Tension was in the air as Yifan punched the wall right beside Junmyun, leaving a dent in the shape of his fist.

“What do you want? I thought we had this talk before. I will pay you the money, and you will get the out of our lives. So tell me, Wu Yi Fan, what exactly do you want from me?”

But Yifan pulled Junmyun into a hungry kiss, dripping with lust and desire for the body that was once his.

Yifan whispered,

“You.”

///

I have to find him. I have to find him and ask him what is it between him and Wu Yi Fan..

Sehun was running as far as his legs could carry him, pushing through the crowds to see his father. To his father’s club. He knew where he was. Jongin let it slip once.

So many things were running through his mind as tears brimmed the corners of his eyes. Questions. So many questions. Junmyun had always refused to talk about his real father, which Sehun never pushed any further, not wanting to hurt his Junma. But Junmyun never said the man was still alive.

As a deprived child, Sehun had always wanted a happy family. A family that he was gald to be able to wake up to everyday. A father reading newspaper with a cup of coffee in his hands, talking about politics that no one else in the family cared about with enthusiasm. A daddy cooking jajangmyeon in the kitchen, warming up to him with a smile. Or maybe two or three older brothers who doted on him and secretly slipped candies into his backpack before school. So seeing that his own father was on a news article for wrecking a married man’s family broke Sehun’s heart.

Let alone saying that the man was Wu Yi Fan, the person who attacked him the other night. Sehun was furious. He couldn’t hear his own thoughts as he dashed through the crisp autumn wind, chasing with time. He couldn’t breathe, lactic acid building up in his lungs. But he didn’t need oxygen now. He needed the truth. He needed answers.

Sehun got through security easily. He kicked every door open until he was standing at the right one.

With shaky hands, Sehun the light.

The sight in front of his eyes were making him nauseous.

Right before him, the bastard Wu Yi Fan was pinning his Junma onto the leather couch, his face in the other’s exposed neck. His Junma didn’t show any signs of resistance until he noticed the younger standing at the door, trembling in anger.

“What....What’s going on? Why are you...you two...together...” Sehun said with tears rolling down his cheeks.

“Sehuna! It’s not what it looks like!” Pushing the larger man off him, Junmyun ran towards Sehun while buttoning up his own shirt. Before he could pull his son into an embrace, Sehun ran away.

Yifan didn’t follow them.

“Sehun! Stop! Listen to me!” Junmyun yelled, his feet trying desperately to catch up with the younger’s long limbs. Seoul at midnight was packed with party people who didn’t have time to spare a glance at the pair of father and son. They were making it hard for him to see the younger.

Sehun stopped at an intersection. Junmyun could see the tears in his eyes and feel them pricking at his heart. With trembling hands, he reached out for the broken boy.

“What, Omma? What do you have to say? You lied to me! You said that Appa is dead! Then why are you with him? Why are you kissing that man... Tell me, Omma! Tell me, that he’s not my father...” Sehun yelled, hands clenched into fists. Passers-by stopped to look at them, curious. The light turned red.

“I’m sorry, Sehun. I didn’t mean to keep it from you...” Junmyun’s face fell. So Sehun knew the truth. He was bound to know it sooner or later. It was just that...Junmyun didn’t expect it to be this soon.

“So...it’s true? That...” There was hurt in his voice. Junmyun had never seen his son so sad before. He was crying before Sehun turned away from him, away from the father he’d lived with for seventeen years.

When we crash and burn into the pavement...

“Sehuna, listen to me!” Junmyun ran after Sehun who was dashing to the other side of the street, unaware of the light that had just turned green.

“No more! Please!” Sehun screamed back.

It was the last thing Junmyun heard before the sound of screeching tires filled the air.

There was a thud that followed, flashing lights and screams of bystanders who watched as the scene unfolded before them.

Junmyun was out of breath as Sehun’s body was flung into the air before hitting the curb, lifeless. He looked into the driver’s eyes with terror, whose head was bleeding from colliding with the steering wheel. The windshield was smashed.

It was Luhan.

///

“He’s not coming?”

“I didn’t tell him.”

“I’m sorry, Jongin-ah...”

“That’s alright. It’s better that he forgets me now...”  

Jongin wiped away his tears as he hugged Uncle Jongdae and Uncle Kyungsoo one last time. The boarding pass felt heavy in his fingers.

But the future was before him now. He could see it welcoming him with open arms. Studying at a prestigious university in the United States would bring him perfect opportunities to become the best. Jongin had waited for this all his life. Now it’s time he grasped it.

Even if he chose a PhD over Sehun...

“Sehun ah, you are the greatest thing that happened to me. Thank you for being you. Thank you for putting up with a selfish, greedy and overly-ambitious me. It had been a joy teaching you and for me, you’re not just a student. You’re my life. You’re the reason I wake up everyday, knowing that your company would make me feel better about myself. Please don’t hate me. I will come back for you soon. Jongin.”

///

Sehun was rushed into the Operation Room.

Junmyun still remembered all the blood dripping from the wound on his head. He still saw it when he closed his eyes. He had always hated hospitals. Every time he stepped foot in this solemn place, somebody he loved left him to suffer life alone. Junmyun was already crying when he thought about the possibilities that could happen to his child.

“I heard that...father was with you. I wanted to see for myself, for my own two eyes, that the man I love isn’t seducing my father. So I pressed the pedal. I needed to be there at fast as I could...”Luhan said in a monotonous voice, the incident flashing through his eyes in slow motion.

It all happened so fast. He didn’t see Sehun coming. And before he knew it, things were already spiralling out of control.

“But then destiny really has a way of kicking me in the , right,” Luhan chuckled dryly. Junmyun’s stomach churned.

Could he really blame Luhan?

“A few weeks ago Sehun came to us. He needed a job. And I played around with him. I knew he’s-he’s your son, but-but at that time I was...jealous. I didn’t know any better. I felt like...like you should have paid more attention to me, instead of him...” Luhan croaked. It was when Junmyun opened his eyes again that he saw the tears in Luhan’s eyes for the first time.

“You don’t hate me for doing all these things to him, right?” Luhan sobbed like a child while hugging his knees. It was then that Junmyun felt the pain of seventeen years of running rushing back full force.

“Oh my, Luhan...” He pulled Luhan into a tight embrace, something he had wanted to do for such a long time. There was no pushing away. He couldn’t hurt himself, nor Luhan, by doing it. He was too greedy, too hurt to pull away from Luhan’s warmth, the blood rushing in the young man was his own, created as a product of his and Yifan’s love.

Just then, a nurse came and tapped his shoulder, “Excuse me, the patient is losing a lot of blood. His O Rh- blood type is very rare, and the hospital has ran out of supplies, so he needs a family donor immediately or we will lose him.”

*runs away before getting bricked*