“Junhong, wake up.”

Junhong stirred but kept his eyes closed. He wasn't in the mood to get up and face the day.

“Junhong! Wake up or you’ll be late for school!”

Someone took him by the shoulder and started shaking him. Startled, Junhong sat up that instant and accidentally knocked his head to someone’s forehead.

“Ouch!” a hoarse voice moaned. Junhong rubbed his head and blinked repeatedly, focusing on the blurry figure in front of him. “Your head sure is as hard as a stone!”

When Himchan’s face was clear enough for Junhong to see, Junhong scowled and slid his feet off the bed. Then he grabbed his towel and went into the bathroom, ignoring Himchan who was babbling out random things about being late to school.

He felt a little bit of satisfaction when he realized that he’d hit Himchan’s forehead.

♦

After putting on his school uniform, Junhong got out of his room— originally a guest room which had been left empty for a long time— and was about to step out of the house when Himchan called out for him from the kitchen.

“You should eat your breakfast,” Himchan stated, sitting on one of the chairs at the dining table. His lips were curled up into a smile which contained full expectation and Junhong felt like wiping off that smile from his face with his fist. He didn't know why he felt so annoyed by that man's smile.

The smile instantly left Himchan's face when he realized that Junhong hadn't move from where he was standing.

"Oh come on, I woke up at 6 to prepare this for you," Himchan pouted and Junhong wondered whether he would ever stop pleading.

He was freaking stubborn.

Junhong debated mentally for a while but then he shuffled towards the table and sat down, chewing on the breakfast mechanically.

It’d been three days since he lived in Himchan’s house. He was still surprised, to tell the truth. He just couldn’t accept the fact that he was living under the same roof with a murderer. He should’ve gone mad and started strangling him for revenge but here he was, eating breakfast, made by the murderer himself.

What had caused him to hesitate?

Why didn’t he just confront him and tell him everything about Yongguk?

Junhong looked up from his breakfast and observed the murderer.

He was standing by the sink, washing the dishes and humming to his favorite song. He looked normal. He didn’t look like anyone who’d killed someone. Maybe Junhong had made a mistake. Maybe this person wasn’t the murderer. Maybe Junhong didn’t memorize the murderer’s face completely and had assumed that Kim Himchan was the one he’d seen that unfortunate day.

Junhong was starting to doubt his memory.

Did he remember the wrong person?

He closed his eyes, biting his lips.

No, he was certain that Himchan was the person behind the wheels. He’d seen it clearly with his own eyes. He’d seen Himchan gripping the steering wheel with wide eyes after he’d knocked over Yongguk.

Junhong knew it was him.

There was no mistake.

“I’ll drive you to school,” Himchan told Junhong when he’d finished washing the dishes. “It’s always raining these days, don’t you think so?”

Junhong stared at his empty plate and traced his finger at the side of the table. He kept asking himself why he didn’t tell Himchan about Yongguk.

Was he trying to hide it from him? There was no reason for him to hide it. He was the victim. He was supposed to vent his anger towards Himchan for killing his beloved brother.

Himchan had killed Yongguk.

Why couldn’t Junhong say it to him?

Was it because Himchan had saved his life? Was it because Himchan had been nice and friendly?

Junhong let out a sad sigh. He wasn’t even sure whether he was doing the right thing. It wasn’t like he could kill Himchan legally. When he thought about it, Himchan didn’t kill Yongguk on purpose. He was just careless.

Fate had turned their lives upside down.

Junhong should’ve blamed fate. But since fate wasn’t even a living thing, Junhong had resorted to resenting Himchan.

Revenge sounded really stupid to Junhong all of the sudden. What was he thinking? That he could kill Himchan and live happily ever after?

He doubted that happy ever after existed.

“I’ll pick you up after school.” Himchan told Junhong when they’d reached the school. “I’ll wait here until you come so don’t disappoint me, okay?”

Junhong turned around to face him after he’d stepped out of the car. He eyed the man longer than usual, earning a quizzical look from the latter. Without a word, Junhong nodded in reply and walked towards the school building, hands shoved deeply into the pockets of his black trousers.

Yongguk hyung, what would you do if you were me?

♦

Junhong twirled a basketball on his finger, turning it with his other hand to maintain the speed and all the while trying to balance it so it wouldn’t fall off.

He was sitting on the ground, basking in the evening sunlight at the basketball court. His friends had left the court after playing for two hours. They’d asked him to join them for a short break at the nearest convenience store but he was too lazy to walk so he ended up alone at the court, playing by himself.  

“Yo!” a deep voice greeted him, followed by a hard slap on his back which had caused him to drop the ball and shriek.

“Hyung!” Junhong turned to face Yongguk after he’d composed himself. He rubbed his back and scowled at his brother who was laughing at him. “That’s not cool. You should stop doing that. You sound like a serial killer with that deep voice of yours.”

“But it’s fun giving you a mini heart attack.” Yongguk chuckled, sitting cross-legged beside the boy. “Hey, let’s play. The one who makes the first goal wins. The one who loses cooks dinner.”

“I’m beat,” Junhong shook his head. “It won’t be fair for me to play in this condition.”

“Hey, I ran here so that makes two of us exhausted. Fair enough, don’t you think so?” Yongguk raised a brow challengingly. Junhong narrowed his eyes at his brother. Yongguk leaned closer and poked him on the forehead. “What? Is our Jello too afraid to challenge the king of all games?”

“Five cups of ramyeon for me then,” Junhong stated before he got up and started dribbling the ball towards the basket.

“Yaa, that’s a foul start!” Yongguk growled, scrambling to his feet to chase the boy.

Not giving Yongguk a chance, Junhong dodged his attack and swiftly moved closer to the basket. Then he jumped and threw the ball. The ball went into the basket flawlessly.

“I won!” Junhong shouted, raising his fists in the air, figuratively jumping in joy. “Yes, five cups of ramyeon!”

“I told you it’s a foul,” Yongguk grumbled in annoyance, breathing heavily as he lay sprawled on the ground. “Aish, I’ll just let you win this time.”

“Who’s the king now?” Junhong bent down in front of his brother to flash him a triumphant smile.

Yongguk glared at him but then ended up laughing. He couldn’t stay mad at his brother. He wouldn’t and never actually.

As the two siblings made their way out of the court, Junhong suppressed a big grin and hit Yongguk’s head with the basketball lightly. Yongguk turned to face him and grimaced in pain, although it wasn’t painful at all.

“Let’s play another game,” Junhong smiled, eyes shining with eagerness. “The one who reaches home first will get to eat anything he wants.”

“Yaa, yaa!” Yongguk yelled at the boy who had started sprinting down the street. “FOUL! Junhong, you’re dead meat!”

Junhong laughed as he glanced back to look at his brother who was chasing him from behind. Yongguk looked furious. It wasn’t because he was angry, it was because he was determined to win. That was the kind of person he was— competitive, just like Junhong.

Since Junhong was already tired from playing basketball, he eventually slowed down. Yongguk caught up with him, capturing him like a predator would do to its prey.

“Fine, I give up!” Junhong exclaimed, his long arms flailing about when Yongguk threatened to give him a bone crushing hug. “But I can still have my five cups of ramyeon, right?”

“You silly punk,” Yongguk ruffled his hair, turning it into a bird’s nest. “You’ll only get three because you cheated.”

Junhong made a face and was about to throw the basketball at Yongguk when it slipped off his sweaty hands.

The ball bounced down the road, producing loud thuds as it came in contact with the road. Yongguk scolded Junhong for being clumsy and walked towards the ball, bending down right at the moment where a car came in sight with fast speed.

It happened in a blink of an eye.

Junhong didn’t even get to see the car knocking Yongguk over, throwing him in the air for a brief moment and causing him to roll on the road limply.

All Junhong saw was the face of the petrified driver.

The driver had his trembling fingers wrapped around the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles white. His eyes were wide in shock, his brown hair disheveled by the sudden impact.

Junhong could only remember his face.

The rest of it was forgotten. He didn’t remember the driver getting out of the car and trying to wake up Yongguk who was bleeding profusely. He didn’t remember the driver shouting for help with his hoarse voice. He didn’t remember hopping inside the ambulance with his hand wrapped around Yongguk’s securely. He didn’t remember listening to the driver apologizing to Yongguk countless of times.

The next thing Junhong remembered, he was attending his brother’s funeral.