Chapter Four

She gulped and looked worriedly at the girl who was straining herself for practice. It would have been alright if it was under the normal situation but it’s far from normal. She wanted to scold her for being too stubborn for her own good and tell her to take it easy. She wanted to tell it to her badly, to the point that it was already hurting. She wanted yet she cannot.

During these times that can make her hate her own age. If she was older, or at least the same age with her, she can have a say on this. And right now, all she can do is just watch over her and protect her at the best of her ability and power.

She must not let any harm lay upon her. Not on her hawk eyed watch. Just as she was thinking about it, she noticed how her breathing was getting unsteady and no one inside the room noticed it yet. Well, no one except for her. Grabbing a bottle of cold water and a clean towel, she runs towards her and handed it out.

She saw her formed a timid smile on her face which made it all worth it. All the worries for her are all worth it because of her smile.

“Dara-unnie… drink some more.” She called her out name sweetly as she offered another bottle of water and grabbing the now empty bottle.

“Thanks, Mingkki!” Dara weakly said and slowly sat on the empty chair. “I’m lost without you…”

“It’s my pleasure unnie…” She shyly answered and turned around to return the empty bottle when somebody snatched it from her hands.

With a frown formed on her face, she looked at the culprit and saw a smirking Youngdeuk with the empty bottles on his hands. She rolled her eyes and demanded for the bottles to be turned over.

“Oppa, give it back to me…” She demanded and pouted cutely, making the guy’s cheek flustered. His blushing cheeks which she missed. “Oppa!”

“I’ll get some water for you and noona.” Youngdeuk whispered and runs away quickly to hide the tomato face of his.

“Oppa!!” She yelled as she shook her head while watching Youngdeuk runs away. She heard Dara let out a chuckle which made her turned around to face her. She pouted and uttered, “What’s so funny about that? Just snatching the bottles without any notice.”

“You’ll understand someday, Mingkki.” Dara responded and smiled weakly.

“Pft. Oppa is just annoying the heck out of me…” She stated and went by the older girl’s side. She whispered, “How was your morning sickness, unnie?”

She looked at her saw the color of her face disappear. She smiled sympathetically and reached for the older girl’s hand then lightly squeezed it.

“I am here for you, unnie. I hope you can trust me…” She uttered sincerely.

“I know…” Dara said.

An awkward silence passed by and she saw the older girl looking at another direction. She followed her eyes and saw the oldest of them staring at space with a troubled look. She just noticed now that even the oldest girl, Bom, is too quiet. Maybe that was the reason why the air inside the practice room is filled with tension.

“Is it me or is Bom-unnie a bit too quiet?” She asked out of the blue.

“It’s not just you. Everyone inside the room has noticed it as well… But no one dared to approach her yet to ask her if there’s anything wrong…” Dara said and stood up. “Until now…”

She watched her favorite unnie approached the oldest of them four and she saw the latter hugged Dara tightly. The two didn’t even talk yet they understood each other.

Why am I unable to do that?
 

Am I not a trustworthy dongseng after all?

Why do they look so far away?

“Jiyong…”
 

He heard someone called out his name. His head slightly turned around and saw the oldest member of the group looking at him with a worried and confused expression on his face. He smiled and motioned for the guy to come sat beside him.

“Hyung, what happened?” He asked and offered a can of beer that was just on their feet.

“I met up with her…” Seunghyun uttered while grabbing a can from the plastic bag. “After a long time… I met up with her…”

“With whom?” He asked in an uninterested way.  Although, he already knew who he was referring to but he wanted his hyung to tell him who it was.

“With Min Ah…” Seunghyun answered in a barely heard voice.

“Does she know?” He asked as he tapped his fingers on the can that he was holding while looking at the empty space in front of them. He can hear the older guy heave a sigh which indicates a problem. He cleared his throat and whispered, “Of course, she doesn’t know. You didn’t want her to know.”

“Jiyong… It’s not like I wanted to hide it from her…” Seunghyun tried to explain himself but stopped himself when he saw the disapproving stare of his friend. He sighed and said, “Fine, I’m going to tell her.”

“And what are you going to tell her?” He asked and looked at the older guy intently. He cleared his throat and mimicked the older guy’s voice then utter, “Hey baby, I just met up with my ex-girlfriend and it seems that I’m not over her yet.”

“I did not say I wasn’t over her!” Seunghyun protested and clenching his fist tightly. “How can you say such things?!”

“Then why do you have to meet up with her behind noona’s back?!” He growled. “You could have just been upfront on her and tell her you are going to talk with her!”

“Who are you to question me like that? When you have done this thing before?! Remember the time when you went behind Dara-noona’s back and met up with J-ah! You have no right to ask me that when you did the same thing!” Seunghyun exclaimed and grabbed the collar of Jiyong’s shirt. He uttered in a trembling voice, “You should understand this feeling… You should because you have been here.”

“I’m telling you this because I have been there. I just did not tell everyone that I almost lost her because of it…” He whispered and winced when he remembered the time that he almost lost her. “If you don’t want to lose Bom-noona, please be honest with her.”

“Whatever, man.” Seunghyun stated and stood up. “Don’t mess into my business.”

“I’m just saying.” He exclaimed to the guy who was walking away. In his point of view, he was running away from the problem.

She was called in to the president’s office secretly. It was actually Eun Joo, the president’s wife, who has called her and lured her in to the office. Right now, she was waiting for the appearance of the president. Uneasy feelings started to build up inside of me and she knew that it might have something to do with her own dilemma now. She would not even be surprised if the president knew about her pregnancy.

Her thoughts were filled with a lot of worries that she did not notice the president had already entered the room. If the president didn’t call her, she might have spaced out a lot longer.

“Dara-yah…” YG called out her name and snapped a finger in front of her face.

“S-sajangnim!” She blurted out in surprise and for a split second, she saw amusement in his eyes. However, it was just for a split second since it was soon replaced by wary expression that made me worried.

“Dara-yah… You should probably know why I have called you, right?” YG asked and stared at the fidgeting girl in front of him.

“So you knew…” She uttered in a barely heard voice. She shook her head and said with more conviction, “Of course you knew. You knew the signs of it.”

YG just nodded and he can feel the uneasiness of the girl in front of him. He can see the sweat starting to form on her forehead, an indication that she was really nervous with this topic. He can see her muscles tensing up and it’s probably a nerve wracking moment for her now.

The room was silent for a couple of minutes. It was the president who broke the silence between them.

“Does he know?” YG asked as he stared at her intently.

She quickly shook her head.

“Do you have any plans to tell him?” YG asked.

She looked up at the old guy and sighed. She doesn’t know if she should tell Jiyong. She was debating herself on what to do with it. Should she tell her? But what if Jiyong doesn’t want her child? What if she rejects her?

There are lots of questions that bother her.

“Seeing you with that expression means you haven’t decided yet.” YG concluded that made her yelped. “I think that’s a good decision. For you not to tell him yet.”

“You think so, president?” She asked as she bits her lower lip. “Not telling him would be the best decision?”

“What do you think?” YG asked mysteriously.

That question made her think. Jiyong is on top of his career now. He has finally managed to break free from being an idol to being acknowledged as a musician, as an artist and as a producer. Telling him might distract him. Accepting the baby is out of the question and she feels that this would just bring trouble to him. And she doesn’t want that.

“I understand, president.” She uttered as her grip on the armrest of the chair tightened. “I guess this is for the best.”

“Dara-sshi, are you sure about this?” YG asked.

She nodded. She was about to excuse herself when YG stopped her again.

“How about the girls? Does anyone know?” YG asked.

“Only Minzy knows.” She answered. “She was with me when I went to the doctor.”

“I see.”

“Is that all?”

“Well, how about the group activities? Would you like to take a break from it?” YG asked.

She shook her head violently. No, she cannot take a break from their activities. Not when they are almost on top and they would be able to reach for their goals. And if ever she did that, she’s sure that Chaerin would hate her more. She doesn’t want that. The group’s goal is just right around the corner. She cannot afford to take a break.

“No.” She uttered with conviction. “Please don’t take me off the group.”

“It would be hard for you.” YG stated with no expression in his face.

“I already know that.” She said and caressed her tummy. “I know that but I just cannot leave the group now.”

YG sighed at the stubbornness of the girl in front of him and nodded.

“Fine, but if I ever see you endangering yourself because of this, I won’t hesitate to take you off the group. Do you understand that?” YG exclaimed.

“I understand…” She said and gulped.

“Good, you can go now.” YG said and dismissed the younger girl.

YG watched her leave and then let out a heavy breath.

“I hope that this turns out well…” YG whispered to himself as he looked at the empty space.