Chapter Thirteen

She stared at the empty locker and looked at the empty practice room. The once lively room where she spent half of her day practicing is now like a graveyard for her—empty and gloomy. She knew that there are pairs of eyes watching her every movement. Some of them are the staffs, some of them are the dancers whom she became close with and some of them are the trainees.

Her situation wasn’t disclosed to everyone so she can’t blame everyone for being curious. Who wouldn’t? She was moving her things out and emptying her locker. The renowned leader was often seen following her around but never approaching her, like a fan that was too afraid to approach his idol.

“Noona…” She heard the familiar squeaky voice of the youngest member of Big Bang.

Reluctantly, she turned around to face the guy and found herself smiling timidly. She said in an almost whisper voice, “Hi.”

“Are you really leaving us?” Seungri asked with eyes burning holes at her. She was about to answer but he added abruptly, “Are you really leaving him?”

She took a deep breath and bit her lower lip. This kind of situation was something she wanted to avoid at all. Normally, she would go ahead and ignore it but she owed it to this guy. Seungri is someone whom she became close with especially when both groups were busy promoting in different countries. He became a support for her.

“Seungri…” She can only mutter as the drooping eyes of the guy were now filled with different emotions—anger, sadness and disappointment. Those are just a few emotions she can identify on his eyes.

“I thought that you love him.” Seungri stated filled with defiance. “I thought that you would not leave him. That you would stay even at the worst situation! I thoug—”

“Ri…” She cut him off and reached out for the younger guy’s arms. “Please understand…”

“What should I understand, noona?” Seungri asked in a tone louder than he intended to be. He smirked in disbelief, as he added, “Should I understand that you are a coward? A weak hearted woman like his past gi—”

SLAP!

“It’s not like that at all!” She yelled as if all the noises have died down after it. Her tears started to build up but she controlled herself. She won’t cry here. Not now, not here. In a soft and wavering voice, she said, “I love him. God knows how much but...”

“But what?”

“But it’s not enough anymore. It’s not enough reason for me to stay here. To stay with him. I have reasons to leave. I’m sorry if you think I’ve failed your expectations. I really do.” She explained. “If only I can change it, I would. I don’t want any of these to happen.”

She saw the regret in the younger guy’s eyes. She smiled timidly and gave him a hug as if comforting him from the bad feelings he have now.

“I’m really sorry for being such a disappointment, Seungri. Please forgive your noona.” She whispered as she hugged him. “I’ll miss you.”

Then she let go of him and walked away from him. Away from everyone else.

“! !” He cursed inwardly as he watched her walked away.

He wanted to run after her and begged repeatedly for her to stay but his best friend, Youngbae, was stopping him. He can just watch her as he cried inside. This is killing him since he can’t do anything but watch her leave.

“Youngbae! She’s leaving!” He cried out as his best friend let go of him, finally. “She’s leaving me...”

“She needs time for herself.” Youngbae reasoned out which seemed so incomprehensible for him.

“She needs me right now!” He protested as if he wanted someone to be on his side. To tell him it was right to chase after her. To push him for a little bit that it is right for him to stay with her, that it would do her good. But to his disappointment, no one told him that. Not one person, not his family, not the president and not even his best friend.

Was it him being selfish?

Was it too much to ask for him to stay with her?

He loves her so much that he was letting her leave now. But what about him? If she’s leaving because she needs to heal her broken heart, who would heal him when she’s the only cure for it?

“She loves you, haven’t you heard it?” Youngbae tried to soothe him.

“But she said it wasn’t enough, didn’t you hear her?” He asked back and his heart sinking as seconds pass by. At that time, he saw the one person who really played the bigger role in this.

 The anger and pain inside him have mixed and made him blind with other things. He took a deep breath before he runs after the person who caused his misery. The person who caused her to leave. He had enough of staying silent as he needed to confront her. He needed this or he won’t be at ease at all.

“Jiyong, don’t do that!” He heard Youngbae yelled but his mind stopped listening already.

He already heard enough of those. He obliged to it but look at where he is now.

Broken and alone.

Now, he’ll do it on his own way.

It was early morning when she got a call from the president and telling her to come to the office as soon as she can. She would have come earlier but her lover kept her on his bed for late hours. Their late secret rendezvous at nights were something she looked forward to. Now that everything was in chaos because of a selfish and thoughtless girl.

She already heard it from the other staffs about her wish to leave.  She can only roll her eyes at that the childish reaction she had. If it was her, she would just stay and move on. This was her dream and nothing can make her stop. Such a stupid person.

She was on her way to the president’s office and absurd on her own thoughts when she felt herself suddenly pinned down on the wall. Her eyes tried to focus on the person and she saw an enraged Jiyong grabbing her by the neck.

“It was you.” Jiyong growled as if he wanted to snap her neck. “You killed our baby! You pushed her to her limits! You made her leave!”

“It wasn’t my fault that she’s a coward!” She yelled as she tried to wriggle herself out but failed as his grip on her neck tightened, making it harder to breath.

“Say that again. I dare you to say that again!” Jiyong uttered with seeping anger. His eyes widened and squinted as he dug his nails onto her neck. “I dare you to say it again!”

“It hu…hrts…” She struggled to utter those two words as it was hard to breathe.

“Did you know she’s hurting as well?” Jiyong asked mockingly and she felt as if she was going to lose consciousness. She can barely hear Youngbae trying to get Jiyong off her but the latter was damn persistent.

“H…h..u..hrts” She stuttered.

“KWON JIYONG! STOP IT! IN MY OFFICE NOW!” The familiar voice of the president boomed in and that’s when he managed to let go of her, making her catch on her breath. The president looked at her direction and turned to Youngbae, “Bring her in to the clinic first.” Then turned to Jiyong who was still enraged, “In my office now!”

“I’m not yet finished.” Jiyong threatened before he followed the president as she looked at him in fear.

That was the first time she felt fear for the guy and she didn’t like it.

“You better pray that hyung can make sense on that guy or else you’re finished one way or the other unless she comes back to stop him.” Youngbae said and motioned her to follow, maintaining a safe distance between them. “I don’t blame Jiyong at all.”

“Why do all of you people blame me? I didn’t tell her to quit. It was her decision.” She uttered as she caressed her bruised neck.

“But you forced her too.” Youngbae answered and walked ahead of her. “You forced her.”