Ypov

 

* Flashback *

 

" Thank you Bae-ah .. I really had fun just now ! " Dara Noona said excitedly giving me a peck on the cheeks .

Due to the rain , we had to run for shelter in the middle of the night .. I had fun with her just now too , relieving our stress from recording all the way this few months . We went shopping and played some crzy games in the arcade , forgetting every burden that we had . It's been a year , Dara Noona and i had been so close to each other .. We shared every secret there was , became closer than ever .. From being mere strangers to somewhat lovers , like everybody said though we never acknowledged it .. Aish ..

 

I heaved a sigh soo deep .. Everytime she does something like that so comfortably .. it somehow made me held my breath unconciously .. My heart skipped a beat everytime we touched . Though she doesn't notice this , not even the slightest clue .. I have been okay with it .. Accepting everything .. as being near her presence was already enough for me . But now seeing her so close to me in this small hut-like shelter by the park near our hostels , triggered determination in me . Determined that somehow she would reciprocate without any hesitations .. I felt strongly that it had to be now .. I have to let her know my true feelings towards her now .

 

Dara Noona noticed me being quiet for a moment and her expression automatically changed to curiosity and concern .

" Bae-ah .. What's wrong ? " she intrigued , her doll-like eyes widening a little .

I kept quiet and stayed silent , taking in her breathtaking beauty .

" youngbae-ah .. " she persisted , tugging on my shoulders now .

" Noona ... " i started to say .

" Hmm ? " she asked cutely .. extending her hands to let the rain drop on her hands .

" I have .. urmm .. something to tell you .. " i declared .

" Whats is it , Bae ? " she intrigued , now looking at me .

" Urmm .. I think we've been close long enough .. i'm sure you know how i feel towards you and I'm sure you feel the same .. " I said softly .

Dara Noona just stared at me , this time , expressionlessly .

" We know each other very well and I just can't continue being in the dark about this matter .. Ithink it's about time we properly commit to each other .. " I smiled .

" Bae-ah .. " Dara Noona said , shocked . Though i'm not too sure if it's a good-shocked or a bad one .

" Deh noona .. i think it's about time you became my girlfriend , for real .. "

" What are you saying .. ? " Dara Noona asked , this time in disbelief .

I bracely placed my lips against hers , conveying the message quite clearly .

" I'm saying ... I .. I .. I love you , Noona-ah .. And i want you to be a part of my life .. " I declared bravely , using every ounce of courage thats in me .

" But Bae .. What about our career ? " Noona asked , exasperated , and too shocked by my sudden kiss .

" What about it ? " I asked bluntly .

" You don't possibly suggest we ignore the ' dating prohibition ' do you ? " Noona said .

' Prohibition .. ? Ah yes , I didn't even thought about that .. '

" They won't know .. " I started .

Dara Noona made me discontinued whatever i was trying to say when she suddenly had tears in her eyes ..

" Why do you have to ruin it ? Let's just stay as friends and everything'll be alright , won't it ? " she asked me .. disbelief still seen through her eyes ..

" Noona .. "  I said , trying to explain how i want us to be .. And no harm will be done if we're exactly careful like Se7en Hyung and Han Byul Noona ..

" You want me to give up my career don't you ? What if YG finds out ! " she flipped .

" He .. "

" This is bull , Bae !! And you got it totally wrong .. I don't love you the way you love me .. " she said making me fell silent , disappointment reeking on my expression .

" I love you just like I love a brother .. Just like that .. " she said .

" Noona .. " I said desperately to her , hurt in my eyes ..

" I'm sorry Bae .. I'm just not up for this .. I love my job soo much .. i don't want to ruin this .. I'm sorry .. " With that , she ran in the rain , further away from me towards the hostel , leaving me all alone here .. Wet , hurt , heartbroken .. no it's not quite broken , It's more like shattered actually .

 

Trying my very best to withstand the pain in my chest , i crumbled to the ground ending on my knees , as though I'm picking up the shattered pieces of my heart on the wet ground , literally .

 

For weeks , I stayed at home .. Not going anywhere unless I had my schedules with BigBang , which doesn't seem like a lot actually at that point of time .. Not confident that i can go through this ordeal without ending up dead , I went crazy .. Searching for Dara Noona in every room in the YG Building .. Words told me that she had already knocked off for the day .. No wonder .. as i take a look at my watch and discovered that it's already half past 1 in the freaking morning .. Not quite grasping the idea that its already soo late , I banged on the door of their hostel mindlessly .

 

" Noona .. Open the door !! " I shouted .

Silence ..

" Dara Noona !!! " I tried again .. The door creaked open , and a redhead poked her head out sleepily .

" What do you want .. youngbae-ah ? " It was Bom Noona .

" I just want to talk to Dara noona " I said .

" She's not here .. " Noona said .   ' She's lying , I know it .. ' , I thought .

" Dara Noona is here , and i know that ! So opent he door ! I want to talk to her ... " I shouted again .

" Aish .. Sikkeuleon ! " Bom Noona said .

" Noona .. Chaebal .. " I pleaded with her .

" Arasso .. But only if you keep it down . " Bom Noona warned me .

" Yeh .. " I said putting my finger on my lips .

 

Bom Noona opened the door for me , keeping still at the door not wanting me to go in the hostel just yet . She looked me up and down and sighed . I can clearly sense the pityness in that sigh . Of course she would feel pity to me .. anybody would . Here i am on a girl's door , sweating like a pig , tears nearly falling down on my cheek .. trying my very best to just get to talk to a girl .. I can clearly understand how pathetic i must be in her eyes .

 

" Wait for me on the couch .. She's sleeping .. I'll wake her up for you  .. " Noona said .

I sat down gently on the couch that i've been so comfortable in , for 1 year now , and suddenly feeling so awkward and out of place . Like i'm unwanted here . I started to tremble remembering the rejection that i got from her the first time .. It was really painful .. Weeks have passed and I can still feel it . The piercing burn inside my heart , which i believe not to be a whole now .

 

A few minutes later , Bom Noona placed a mug of Hot choc on the table , just across for me .

" Drink .. Finish it before i wake her up .. you look terrible .. Bae-ah .. " Bom Noona said courageously .

" Gomawo Noona .. " I said , cuppin the mug with both of my hands . To tell you the truth .. It was really cold .. I didn't even wore any decent clothes to properly cover myself from the cold. I drank it up going for a shot but it was to hot for my tongue to handle even in this cold weather .

" Ahh .. " I cried softly in pain ..

" Slowly .. I didn't ask you to scald your tongue " Bom noona instructed me .

" Mian ... " I replied sipping on my hot choc , while waiting for Bom Noona to wake Dara Noona up .

 

Dpov

 

 

I was awaken by the sound of Bom's sniffings and her soft touch on my leg . I got up abruptly .. seeing a teary-eyed Bom infront of me , sitting at the edge of our bed .

" Bommie-ah .. What's wrong ? " I asked , concerned .

" Sniff .. Sniff .. He ... ahhhh !! " she wailed as soon as as she realised i was awake .

" Yah .. What's wrong ? You're scaring me ... " I asked desperately wanting to know just what is wrong with her today .

" He's waiting for you in the living room .. I just can't see him like that .. he looks terrible .. dara-ah .. " Bom said in between sniffs .

" Who ? Who is waiting outside ? Seunghyun ?? " I asked , completely clueless ..

" Ani .. Aaahhh ! Dara-ah just take him back .. I feel so bad for him .. " She wailed again .

" Hogsi .. " I guessed .

" Deh .. youngbae is waiting for you outside .. He looks just as terrible as you .. Dara-ah .. "

 

Eventhough months has passed and eventhough i put up a strong front infront of everyone , Bommie , CL & Minki knew that i'm as broken as youngbae is .. On the surface i'm all cheery , but deep inside i'm practically dying .. I didn't replied to Bom , I just lowered my head and fight back the tears that was eager to escape my eyes .

 

" Dara-ah .. Chaebal .. Just take him back , if not just put him out of his misery .. Say it straight to him .. Don't leave him hanging .. " Bommie pleaded with me .

I just nodded , looking up to Bommie's teary eyes .

" I don't want him to lose his career because of this crazy rampage . " Bommie said once , this time looking straight in my eyes and continued , " coz i won't forgive you if that really happens Dara-ah .. Fix this please .. " With that being said i looked at her apologetic expression as she got up to make her way out of my room .

 

i slowly got up and washed my face . Once finished with that I perked up all the courage in me to face youngbae in the living room . When i got in the room , he was pacing back and forth , looking so nervous . Not noticing my presence , i took the opportunity to gaze at him for the last time before i really break it off to him .

 

" Bae .. " I croaked .. Clearing my throat immediately after .

Youngbae stopped pacing and turned to look at me . He started to say something but i beat him at it .

" Bae .. I have something to say to you  .. "  I said warily . Being the gentleman he is , he let me go first .. " go ahed .. " he said . Though i can see clearly that he's desperate to ask me to take him back , i bravely voiced out what i wanted .

" I'm sorry i lied to you . I love you so much Bae-ah as much as i love my career " I paused to take in the smile that immediately appeared on his face .

" With saying that , I know we could be together and all and live happily ever after , right ??  .. No .. " I said answering my own question . " I don't want to stain my image in this company .. not to YG .. It took me alot to get in youngbae-ah .. I'm not like you , I'm not trained in the company from young like you .. You're made for this .. While i .. I had to prove it to YG that this is what i really want . And just for love .. I'm not going to ruin it .. bae-ah .. I'm sorry .. I hope you can understand my situation .. " I said looking down at the floor , too afraid to meet his hurt eyes .. 

" I understand Noona .. but why can't we even try ? " Desperation reeking in his voice .

" Try ? Okay .. But what if we get caught ? What are you going to do .. ? " I said breathlessly , tears stung my eyes .

" We wont Noona .. " he said , reaching for my hand .

" No Bae .. Let's just don't .. Let's just stay friends shall we ? " I asked , hastily backing away a little .

" Noona .. I can't .. Don't you understand that that's torturing me Dara-ah .. " he said , raising his voice a little .

" Bae! " I said trying to calm him and also shocked to the fact that he called me by my name . 

" You made me like this Noona-ah .. I can't continue working like this , I can't stop , no appetite to eat and i can't freaking stop thinking about you .. " he shouted . 

" Youngbae .. " i stuttered , scared of whatever he's going to do to me .. Eventhough I'm older than him , he is afterall a man .. And i'm just a helpless girl . 

" Noona all i want is for you to take me as your boyfriend .. That's all .. " he said slowly this time getting closer to me , stretching his arms out slowly for a hug .

" Bae.. Hajima .. " I warned him .

 

He grabbed me and didn't let go .. all the while whispering my name and saying the words ' I love you' all over and over in my ear . I closed my eyes , not believing what i'm seeing , as youngbae changed drastically from someone so gentle to someone so impulsive like this . I feel pity for him , I really did . And somehow I understood him . There never was a time i stopped thinking about him too . My heart beats faster not knowing why , I responded his hug and kissed his cheek tenderly .

 

" We can make it Noona .. We can make this work .. " he said soothingly looking at me still holding me in his arms though . 

" I know your intentions .. I know you love me as i love you but you're scared . " he finished .

" Urm .. " I nodded , confirming his perceptive of my denial .

" Trust me .. We will make this as discreet as ever .. Nobody will even suspect anything . " 

" You promise ? " I asked him , feeling abit unsure .

" Deh Noona .. " he said , kissing my forehead in assurance .

 

Tpov

 

 

One hundred has passed and everything was going very smoothly .. I was ecstatic , reason being .. I wnted to surprise my love with a visit and treat her to dinner . Imagine my shock when i found out she was not in the building  .. Where did she go ? 

 

I called and called but to no avail . I sniffed the bouquet of flowers and smile while walking on the street of our hostel making my way to 2NE1's hostel , when i heard a man's voice in the coffee shop ahead .. I gasped , defeated .. when i saw the man with Dara noona holding hands .

 

" Gomawo Noona , I'll make sure I won't let you down .. " he said .

" Gwenchanh-a .. you know I'll do anything for you .. " Dara Noona replied kissing the guy's cheek .

 

Eventhough she's wearing a hoodie to hide herself from the public . I clearly know that that's her . I approached her and watched her as she talked to the guy infront of her so comfortably ..  i came up behind her so slowly making sure the guy can see me . And after taking a good look at this guy's face . He is none other than the guy they call Cheondung from this rookie idol group MBLAQ .

 

" Urm .. noona there's someone standing right behind you .. " The guy said wearing a confused look . 

" Dugu .. " Dara trailed off , now full turning herself to me .. She automatically widens her eyes clearly flabberghasted then she gasped .. " Youngbae ! "

 

 

---

joesonghabnida Cheongbal joesonghabnida ..

Firstly i really really really really wanted to say sorry for taking so long to continue on this fic . Was thinking and thinking and thinking again on how to edit it here and there when I'm caught up with work . I'm very very sorry .. For those who still reads my fics , jinjja kamsahabnida !

I really appreciate it .. And to those silent readers .. I appreciate you too yah .. hmm And do pluck up the courage to leave comments okae .. I really need positive and negative feedbacks on my first and only fic for now .. Thank you once again .. And enjoy !!

 

Lots of Love <3 

Adelyn