You’re sitting on the bench, in the garden; the garden where you and Chanyeol got married. Unofficially, but still. It’s not exactly the spot where Chanyeol and you sit all the time, the spot just by the lake and under a tree. That place holds lots of memories, some bad, some good, but mostly good. And that is where you two first watch the sunset together. That is also where you first find out that his hair is dropping, which just means his state is getting worse.

That place holds lots of memories… but, you feel like being here for once.

When you first grab hold of the clump of Chanyeol’s dropped hair, you know it never stops there. You know he’ll eventually get weaker, day by day. But somehow, all these while, you never seem to notice or feel that his health condition is declining. Maybe because you’re just being ignorant. Maybe you choose not to believe otherwise. Or maybe it’s just because Chanyeol is good at hiding.

Then again, how long can Chanyeol actually keep it from you? You’re ignorant, but you’re definitely not dumb. You know that Chanyeol is always hiding the truth from you.

After yesterday, everything seems to change. It is a sudden change that you can’t seem to get used to. Baekhyun now knows about your everyday hideout. Kai has never stopped checking up on you, whether it’s through text messages or a quick drop by your room. And Chanyeol… well, Chanyeol has never spoken a word with you. You’ve been in his room since 5 in the morning. You can’t sleep and so you decide to visit Chanyeol, but of course, he was still sleeping then. Still, even when he’s awake, he doesn’t seem to be facing you or even replying you. It’s as if you’re invisible to him. It’s as if he’s suddenly deaf and blind.

It hurts. It hurts to be ignored. It hurts to not be able to hear Chanyeol’s voice.

But you leave him as he is. For all you can do is just patiently stay by his side. Even if he decides to ignore you till his last day.

You look down at the grass ring you have around your fourth finger, remembering seeing the other pair on Chanyeol’s. He’s still wearing it. If he’s still wearing it, you think, it means he’s not completely ignoring you or trying to forget you. Right?

“You shouldn’t be out here.”

You smirk, not looking at the owner of the familiar voice. From the sound and direction of his voice, you figure that’s he’s probably leaning against the tree, that is just behind this bench, on his side. “I like it here.”

He nods, then plopping down by your side. Brushing his hand through his hair, he sighs, “But you should really stay in your room.”

“You know,” you pause, turning your head to Kai. “The last time I checked, you are Chanyeol’s assigned nurse. Not mine.”

Kai shrugs and look forward. “The last time I checked, I am your friend.” You chuckle and he turns to face you. “A friend would have said the same thing, no?”

“Why do I have a feeling that you have out all the craziness from Chanyeol?” you say through a forced smile. Unable to hide your feelings, you sigh and brush your hands down your face. “Chanyeol isn’t talking to me.”

“Ah,” Kai nods, as if it’s something normal. “It’s just a stage.”

“A stage?”

“Yeah. Long story short, there will be a period where Chanyeol will withdraw himself from socializing. Maybe even zone on or mumbles to himself…” he trails off when he sees you staring at him worryingly, like you’re about to cry. “He’ll be fine,” Kai assures with a squeeze on your hand.

There goes the line again. “I,” you pause and sigh. Shaking your head, you then say, “Never mind. Forget it. Yes, he’ll be fine.”

And there you go, lying to yourself, though Kai and Chanyeol has been helping you with that all these while. He’ll be fine. Are they actually treating you as a kid? No, you know he will not be fine. You have seen his condition with your own eyes. Even if his conditions aren’t as obvious but his sudden change of character is. Chanyeol never stays quiet. Chanyeol never spends the whole day sitting on his bed. He definitely will never ignore you. Not until now. That, you are sure of.

“Look, can I be honest here?” you say suddenly, earning a raised eyebrow from Kai. “I know this might be hard for you, and it is quite hard for me to ask, but, can you please just…”

“Hmm?”

You sigh, brushing your fringe back. You hope you’re not going to regret this. “Promise me something.”

“Anything,” Kai responds almost immediately and