"But hating someone... is like eating an ice-cream but wishing the other person will get fat instead. It just makes you feel worse..."




The kiss is but a light peck at first.

A graze. A touch.

It is too little yet it's already too much.


And before you can even react, the second one comes.


His full lips feel soft and tender on yours.

Kyungsoo kisses like it's his first time doing it. It's a plain and untrained kiss. A bit testy, yet under that inhibition is a burning fire of passion.

You find yourself complying to his desire as you kiss back, allowing lips to meld and then eyelids fluttering shut as the kiss deepens, warm and wet, the chocolate that he just ate making it tastes even sweeter than it already is.


Kyungsoo feels his heart burning. He wants to taste more, but he's already running out of breath and it's getting too comfortable and delirious at the same time.

He pulls back gently, breath staggering as both of you hear a short smack from the parting lips.

He shudders, then heaves as you utter shakily, "I-'m going to change the spoon."


______________________


Monday- The 3rd Day


You knew it.

You knew things can't be going so smoothly and not go wrong.




In the morning you wake up to a call jolting you back to reality.

"Your mother is having some complications, are you able to come now?"


You call the office to let them know you'll be coming in late, then knocks on Kyungsoo's door to tell him. He asks to come with you and you oblige. The kiss last night still lingers on the both of your minds and there's an unspoken connection as he leads you by the arm out of the house.


The two of you sit side by side in the train. You are quiet, drowning in thoughts that end as suddenly as they start, fearful of the consequences if you dwell on them any further.

"She'll be alright." Kyungsoo assures softly, hands hesitating before he places one lightly on your arm.

You give him a taut smile.

Somehow seeing you act like this makes him feel even more terrible. He'd rather you cry it out instead of keeping up a pretense that everything's fine.


Your mom is sleeping when you reach the hospice.

She's heavily sedated and there's a mask over .

The doctor tells you to be prepared.


You'll never be prepared.


What does it mean anyway? Prepare your grief? Prepare the funeral? Prepare death?

What does it really mean?


Kyungsoo and you eat a soundless breakfast. You nibble at your dry tuna sandwich when he suddenly pushes his plate of scrambled eggs gently towards you.

You turn and see him looking at you, expression creasing in concern.

"If you don't like the sandwich, you can always eat mine."

You shake your head languorously and pushes it back.

"I'm fine."


You are not fine. Everything tastes bitter to you now, even the milk tea with too much sugar sitting by the side of your plate.

"You haven't taken more than half a piece of sandwich for the last past 15 minutes. You'll need the energy to stay by your mom's side." Kyungsoo nudges the plate again, this time more insistently.

You sigh and took a bigger bite of the sandwich.

"See? I'll just eat my sandwich."


He exhales resignedly.

"Do you need me to... do anything?"

That sentence rings in your ears for a while.


You look him straight in the eyes.

"Kyungsoo, you are already doing it. By being here. With me."


The two of you hold that concentrated gaze, no words exchanged but volumes shared.


Then your phone rings and breaks the silence.

You glance at the flickering screen.

Heck, it's your dad.


It has to come all at the same time. It's almost like the bad things decided that the good things have had their fair share of fun and now it's their turn, they are going to make it double, triple-fold.

"Hello?"

" ____________ , I received a call from the hospital. How is your mom?" It's the hospice, you feel like correcting him. He sounds amazingly calm.

"She's... holding on."

"Why... why didn't you tell me?"

Would you care?

"She doesn't want me to." You answer stiffly.


He is mute for a while.

"I-I'll come and see her."

It's your turn to be dumb.

"In the afternoon." He continues.

You mumble a sound that offers neither a yes or no.

"I'll see you later."

He hangs up.


You must have look disturbed because Kyungsoo is immediately anxious.

"Are you... ok?"

"It's my dad. He wants to see my mom."


"Ok... "

"He says he'll be coming in the afternoon."

You knead the tender part of your nose bridge.

"I just hope he doesn't bring that woman."


Kyungsoo is soundless for a while.

"He won't." He says, like he's positive about it.


_______________


He didn't.

Your father comes alone dressed in a ugly brown polo with a weird white blotch on the chest area.


You avoid looking at him by staring at the faded flowery designed tiles on the hospice's walls as he stands hunched over your mom's bed.

He's quiet.

Then you hear him letting out a spluttered breath. You turn and see him rubbing his face the way you know he does when he's feeling extremely perturbed.


Somehow you feel glad he's at least emotional about it.

"How long... has she been..." His voice comes out in a croak, not finishing the words.


"About one year." You answer.


He rubs his face again.


Two seconds pass.

Then he starts crying.

Sobbing.

"She didn't tell me... She... "


You say nothing. When he buries his head slumped on the chair, you walk out of the ward.

____________________


"I still hate him."

You say in an almost emotionless tone.


Kyungsoo looks at you. The sun is almost setting, the warm rays bathing the both of you in orange by the fountain of the hospice.

"He did something wrong. But he still came." Kyungsoo passes you one of the chocolate ice-cream he just bought at the vending machine.

You tear off the top and bites into the chocolate coating, a soft crackling sound.


"Not like it matters." You mumble.

"It probably doesn't change anything." Kyungsoo shrugs. "But hating someone... is like eating an ice-cream but wishing the other person will get fat instead. It just makes you feel worse.

And you don't need any of that right now."


That analogy tickles you a little, yet you understand his well-meaning.

You hum and take another bite at the ice-cream.

"That's legitimate. So am I getting fat now?" You grin.


Kyungsoo looks at you with a teasing smile.

"We can always go climb a mountain again."

_____________________

Heh, a very innocent and simple kiss scene for u~ haha! Tell me what you think abt the story so far! I love to read comments!