A soft breeze swept through the trees, knocking the golden leaves off their branches as a sure sign that summer was over. Above the tops of the trees, a flock of grey and green ducks few through the cloudy sky. Kibum sat by his window overlooking the front yard with a gentle look in his eyes as he carefully pressed his drawing pencil against the clean sheet of his sketch book and began to trace lines of the scenic beauty before him. He sighed softly as he shaded in the texture of leaves, and for a moment he glanced out the door of his room and across the hall where Heechul was busy folding laundry in his room. He vividly thought that Heechul needed to hurry up or else they’d be late for his appointment with Jia. Chuckling softly at the fact that he was actually anticipating the visit, Kibum smiled slightly and set his sketch book aside.

It wasn’t that he was overly excited to see his psychologist, but the fact that afterwards he was going to visit Tiffany. So much had happened in the past week and everything was changing so quickly, he could barely keep up with it all.

Unfortunately, he’d not been able to visit her at the hospital at all. Heechul would not let him go for some unfathomable reason, but assured Kibum that Tiffany was doing well and he was keeping in touch with Mr. Hwang. Apparently their plans had changed and after the stay at the hospital they were going to stay in Korea a few extra days visiting family. As such, Kibum and Tiffany had not been able to see each other for several days and hadn’t any contact. Needless to say, they were both at their wits end.

Sighing quite loudly while looking across the hall once again, Kibum sent Heechul’s back a glare while wishing that he would hurry up and put the darn laundry aside.

“Hyung, are you done yet? I wanna leave!” He complained loudly, absentmindedly itching the inside of his cast with his pencil. He looked down in irritation, unable to reach the spot that itched. But he couldn’t stay too annoyed after looking at his newly decorated cast. After Mir had come home, the younger boy felt so betrayed that Kibum had not only let Tiffany be the first one to sign his cast but write a love note as well, that he so smugly claimed the rest of the white space with his own message of ‘this ho belongs to Mir’.

“Yes, Kibum, we can leave now. Not that you’re impatient or anything,” Heechul said sardonically as he appeared in the doorway.  Kibum sent him a smile and hopped off the chair, happily walking past him towards the stairs. Without waiting, he walked out the front door as Heechul called out to Donghae that they were leaving and that he would be back in an hour or so.

Once they were both buckled and ready to go, Heechul started the car and began to drive out of the driveway towards the city. And it was long before Kibum found himself sitting in the burgundy seat across from Jia’s desk, staring in boredom at the older woman.

They had a short, quick conversation where Kibum assured her that his medication was working nicely and he’d been able to think more clearly in the past few weeks. He also informed her that he wasn’t freakishly addicted to video games or had any raging desire to kill innocent animals by cutting their heads off, that he was just a normal, happy teenager. And thus, the conversation was short and sweet and they retired to their old routine of staring at each other until the session was over. But it didn’t last long because half an hour in, Jia broke the silence by sighing softly and leaning forward.

“I’ve been thinking about something, Kibum. I know that you don’t like talking to me. Not just because you hate having to actually see a therapist, but me in general. I was thinking about giving you a new therapist,” She told him, folding her hands on the desk. Hearing this, Kibum’s eyes widened and he shook his head fervently.

“No! I don’t want anyone else,” He said quickly, hoping to change her mind.

“I know that, but I think it’s in your best interest,” Jia replied. When Kibum opened his mouth to protest, she held up a hand to stop him and continued on, “However, I know that you aren’t comfortable talking face to face with anyone, and Heechul told me how it was easier when you wrote things that coming out and saying it. I did some research and I found this program through a church that helps at risk youth. They guide teens through tough times, just like a therapist would. Only you do it through emails instead of going to see anyone.”

Kibum stared at her for a moment trying to decipher what she said.

“So…I wouldn't have to actually see anyone?” He inquired, and she nodded in confirmation.

“Not unless you wanted to. It’s strictly private affairs, all you have to do is give me your email and I’ll set you up with one of the counselors there. As a therapist I’ve read over several case files and I think you will like this best. What do you say?” Jia asked. Kibum thought for a minute before shrugging. It did sound much better than coming in every single week to sit while she prodded into his life and forced him to talk.

“I don’t know. I guess it’s okay. Do I have to talk to them about everything?” He asked cautiously, hoping that maybe he could skive it all off and not have to deal with any of it anymore. Unfortunately, Jia shot those hopes down quickly.

“Yes, you have to talk about anything that you would talk about with me. I will still be overseeing your case, Kibum, so don’t think you’re off the hook. It’s your choice though. Do the pen pal system or come and see me every week,” She rationed. Kibum huffed in annoyance and crossed his arms.

“Fine, I’ll do it. But you can’t be snooping through the emails and reading what I write, okay?” He demanded.

“Of course, but your new counselor will have to tell me if anything happens. But, in addition, you’ll have to come see me every other month. That doesn’t sound too bad, does it?” She convinced him, and Kibum nodded in agreement. At the end of the session, Heechul was brought in to discuss their new plan. He was hesitant at first but agreed to give the pen pal system a try.

By time they left, Kibum could feel his heart pounding with anticipation to go see Tiffany. It was a fifteen minute ride to a suburban neighborhood where she and her father were staying with some relatives. As the GPS directed them to a tall white house, Heechul stopped the car in front of the driveway.

“I’ll come get you in an hour or two, alright?” He said to Kibum, who was unbuckling and reaching for the handle.

“Okay,” Kibum replied quickly, itching to hurry up and leave.

“Kibum…enjoy your time with her, okay?” Heechul told him slowly, already knowing what was to come. Kibum nodded seriously and said good bye as he left the car. Before he walked up the driveway he waited until Heechul drove away. Then, taking a deep breath he went up to ring the doorbell and hardly a minute later it flung open to reveal a widely smiling Tiffany.

“You’re here!” She exclaimed, throwing her arms around him tightly. Kibum grinned and hugged her back, lightly breathing in her familiar strawberry scent. They pulled apart and she tugged on his hand, quickly scurrying through the house before running into a room and shutting the door. Sighing in relief, she turned to face Kibum with a smile.

“Just wanted some privacy,” She explained, hopping onto the guest bed and patting the place next to her. As Kibum sat down, he gave her a quick peck on the cheek before starting off the conversation.

“Sorry I haven’t been to see you. Hyung wouldn’t let me for some reason,” He explained.

“Eh. It’s cool, I’ve been a cranky all week anyways. On my period while stuck in the hospital just doesn’t make me a happy person, you know?” Tiffany informed him.

“That’s nice to know, Fany,” Kibum replied, rolling his eyes. She giggles slightly and pushed him backwards onto the mattress, snuggling down next to him comfortably.

“So what’ve you been up to? And how are your brothers?” She asked curiously. Although she’s only met Donghae and Mir once, she liked them a lot.

“They’re good, I guess. Mir left you a message, by the way,” Kibum said, lifting up his arm to show her his colorfully decorated cast. Tiffany laughed delightedly and Kibum felt her breath tickling his neck. “Anyway, I went to therapy for the last time today, thankfully. Instead I get to email a counselor or whatever. I dunno. I just wish I could be done with it all.”

Tiffany propped herself up on her elbows and hovered over him with a stern look on her face.

“Well you wouldn’t be in this position if you hadn’t been an idiot and do drugs and screw up your life. Especially when I tried so freaking hard to help you get your life back on track,” She lectured him. Kibum widened his eyes slightly and sat up, mockingly putting his hands on his hips.

“As I recall, my dear Tiffany, it was you who got me hooked on drugs in the first place. You were the one that thought it would be a bright idea to see what it felt like to get high. So excuse me!” He shot back in defense, and Tiffany snorted back a laugh as she smacked his chest.

“Oh, whatever!”

The conversation died down and they sat together in comfortable silence. Tiffany held Kibum’s hand, lightly tracing over the faded scars that left ridges on his wrist. Vague memories and emotion filled her mind of the day she had found him in the bathroom covered in blood. She’d always known that she loved Kibum, but the moment she realized how much desperation he was in at that time she knew that she couldn’t ever abandon him, and that made her feel foolish now. They had so many memories, good but mostly bad, together. They stuck through thick and thin with a bond that was stronger than most people could ever hope to have, and yet she’d tried to break free of it.

As if he was reading her mind, Kibum spoke up about the subject they needed to talk about most.

“So where is that swanky boy toy of yours anyway?” He asked curiously, having noticed that the American’s presence was nonexistent. Tiffany let out a huff of air and rolled her eyes as a sign of irritation.

“He left a few days ago. I didn’t invite him to come though, in case you were wondering. It wouldn’t have felt right, it didn’t. Korea is where my heart is, my home, my memories…you. I didn’t want him to come here and ruin all of that for me. It wasn’t until the day after the surgery that he showed up at the hospital, bragging about how his parents had let him come to visit me,” She retailed.

“Then why are you with him? You don’t even seem to like him. I get that you were trying to get over me, as if that would ever happen, but why drag out something that doesn’t make you happy?” Kibum asked her earnestly. He didn’t like to see her with unhappy emotions clouding up her naturally smiling eyes.

She sighed softly and rested her head on Kibum’s shoulder, feeling as if their bodies were puzzle pieces that fit together like destiny. It never felt this right when Marcus held her; not that she ever let him hold her like this, it was strictly hugs and holding hands.

“Because I’m not happy. I’m lonely,” She confessed quietly.

The tone of her voice held so much sadness that it sent pangs of guilt through Kibum’s heart and he tightened his hold on her. This is my fault. She does everything in her power to help me and me happy, but I’m too caught up sulking in my own misery that I never pay her the amount of attention and love she gives me, he thought remorsefully.

“I don’t have anyone in America. I’m not popular like I was here and I don’t have any friends. Marcus is really nice to me, though, and when he asked me out I figured I’d just go for it. I thought that maybe eventually I’d learn to like him,” Tiffany continued on.

“Yeah? And how’s that going?” Kibum asked sardonically, and Tiffany grimaced.

“Terrible. I hate white boys, they’re so gross. Like, one time he took me to a party and all his friends were saying that I was his hot Asian girlfriend. Then they all started, like, comparing the size of their meat rods. Right in front of me!” She exclaimed, completely astounded that any teenage boy would act like that. Apparently characteristics between American’s and Asian’s were drastically apart, because she’d never met someone of her own nationality act so crude.

“You didn’t sleep with him, did you?” Kibum asked her cautiously.

At this, Tiffany jerked away from him and stood up, her eyes burning with rage.

“What the , Kibum?! That’s none of your God damn business! I would never sleep with some who flaunts the size of his like a trophy, and I’m not some who sleeps around! The only guy that has ever, and will only ever, see me is you and if we don’t end up together then I guess I’ll just have to die a !” She yelled, grabbing up her pillow and smacking him in the face with it.

Kibum tsk’ed in annoyance and pushed her away from him.

“You’re not even a !” He reminded her smugly, and she scoffed in distaste.

“You were the one that got me drunk and slept with me!” Tiffany defended herself quickly.

“And again, as I recall it was you who dragged me to the party in the first place. So if you really think about it, you were the one that got me in all that trouble in the first place. You’re such a bad influence on me, Tiffany,” Kibum retorted with a grin, and she couldn’t help but smile bashfully at the truth of it.

“You’re so annoying,” She told him, sitting back down next to him. Kibum hummed in agreement and wrapped his arms around her once again.

“And I don’t know what you’re talking about ‘if we don’t end up together’. I’ll wait for you forever or I’ll die alone,” He said seriously. Tiffany smiled softly but it didn’t reach her eyes as she looked at him forlornly.

“You do know that I’m not staying here, right?” She asked him quietly.

Kibum frowned softly and rested his chin on the top of her head as he pulled her close to his chest.

“Yeah…I know.”

They stayed together in silence, enjoying the last of each other’s presence. It didn’t have to be said, this wasn’t the right time for them to be together. The situation was too complicated, and even if they did try to pursue their relationship again it wouldn’t work out.  Yes, they were in love, but they were young.

“I’ll call you every single day and we’ll write letters again. And we only have two years of high school left, I’ll wait for you until then. I’ll come back and we’ll go to college together and then get married and have kids, or whichever comes first,” Tiffany assured him.

“You know, I tried to buy you a ring the other day. Apparently I have a lot of money in the bank, but unfortunately I don’t have access to it until I come of age, so I couldn’t get a ring,” Kibum informed him with a grin. Tiffany giggled and looked him in the eyes.

“I don’t need a ring to symbolize our promise. I love you and that’s all that matters,” She said, sweetly kissing him.  

“I love you too,” He whispered back.

For the rest of their time together they stayed in each other’s embrace, rekindling past memories and just bathing in each other’s affection, enjoying their last moments together.

Two years seemed like an awfully long time, but it was a promise and neither of them doubted that. They didn’t know what the future had in store for them, but as long as they were together they would be able to look ahead with bravely and wait until the time was right.