For the end of July it actually wasn’t very hot out, but then again, the temperature had dropped due to the sudden week of rain showers. But even if it went from nearly ninety degrees to seventy, the humidity level was still high. Despite any of this, Kibum had decided to head to the library for a few hours instead of being stuck home for another day. It had gotten pretty lonely ever since Mir had decided to go back to stay with his father, so Kibum had no one except for Heechul to hang out with. As much as he loved his hyung, staying home and helping Heechul clean today just didn’t sound appealing. He couldn’t wait until Donghae came home next week.

Standing in between two large shelves full of books, Kibum silently skimmed through the large collection for another book to add to his pile. While he normally enjoyed spending time at the library, the silence was almost a sanctuary, today it smelled like musty, old people because of the humidity from outside. Crinkling his nose, Kibum grabbed one last book before picking up the other two and quickly headed towards the librarians desk to check out. When he reached the front of the library he handed over his books and pulled out his library card, carefully handing it over so his hand didn’t touch the old librarians. She was sweet but Kibum knew for a fact that she picked her nose and didn’t wash her hands.

“Here you are, sweetheart. Have a nice day,” The old lady said with a kind smile. Kibum returned it with a faint thank you and turned to head outside. Almost immediately he felt something drop onto his nose and when he looked up he could tell that it was starting to sprinkle out.

Ah, man. I hope it doesn’t rain, I don’t want to go home and help hyung clean, he thought glumly, wiping away another drop. But when a few more rain droplets were felt he decided to go to the ice cream shop to read one of his books in silence while enjoying a frozen yogurt.

The shop was a lot cooler than the library, for which Kibum was extremely thankful; summer was not his favorite season. Walking over to the booth in the far corner, he set down his books so he could go order his yogurt. But when he turned around, he realized that there was someone else in the shop. Sitting alone on the other end was Key, looking rather glum.

Just knowing that someone does care...

“Hey…are you waiting for someone?” Kibum asked when walked over. Key glanced up, looking surprised that Kibum was actually talking to him.

“No,” He replied, and looked away. Although he didn’t seem to want to talk, Kibum didn’t turn away. He was going to make a difference, even if he wasn’t wanted.

“Can I sit with you? Thanks,” Kibum said, sitting down without waiting for an answer. Key scoffed and crossed his arms and as he did so, Kibum could see several faded yellow bruises covering the skin.

“What do you want? If this is some sort of plot so that you can kill me, no thanks,” Key told him sarcastically. 

“Why are you so mean? You don’t know me, and you don’t know Mir either. We’ve been nothing but nice to you. Why do you feel the need to treat us like crap?” Kibum said seriously, trying to keep the annoyance out of his voice. He knew that if he left Key know that he got to him that this conversation would go nowhere.

“Because I can, that’s why. Now, what do you want?” Key responded in an icy tone. Kibum sighed and nodded slightly.

“Wanna know something?” He said, looking Key in the eyes. “Last year I was going through a lot of stuff and it was really hard. But one day some stranger helped me for no reason, and it annoyed me. I wanted him to just leave me alone. I didn’t get why he cared about what I was doing. And you know what he told me? Shouldn’t it make you feel better to know that someone does care?”

And with that, he picked his books up and left the shop.

It had started raining a bit harder, much to his displeasure. He sighed softly and began walking home with no other choice.

“Hey, wait!”

Kibum stopped and turned around to see Key running towards him. The boy came to a halt in front of him and shuffled his feet awkwardly.

“What?” Kibum asked curiously.

“I’m sorry,” Key said. Kibum stared at him, almost shocked that he’d just heard an actual apology. He nodded slightly and turned away.

“It’s Mir who you should be apologizing to,” He said and began to walk away.

“Wait, where does he live?” Key said quickly, hurrying to keep up with him.

Later that night, Heechul and Kibum sat in the living room together. There was a comfortable silence filling the air as they each did their own thing, Kibum reading and Heechul fooling around on his laptop. But it was getting late and Kibum felt his eyes sting and water from trying to keep himself awake. He was tired but he wanted to stay up and finish the last chapter. Stifling a yawn, he closed his eyes for just a moment.

“Kibum, just go to bed,” Heechul said from beside him, amusement clear in his voice. Kibum snapped his eyes open and shook his head, picking his book back up. But Heechul reached over and took it out of his hands.

“Bed.”

Kibum was leaning against the bathroom wall, his head bowed over as he slept uneasily. His consciousness was beginning to return, along with all five senses. He could feel his head throbbing painfully and it felt as if his ear were filled with static. His joints ached and overall it just felt as if he'd been hit by a semi-truck going one-hundred miles an hour.

A soft whine escaped his lips and slowly lifted his head as he opened his eyes. He blinked a couple of times, swallowing thickly, and looked around his surroundings. He realized he was in the bathroom when he found the toilet right next to him, seat up and a little bit of vomit on the rim. Across from him sitting on the edge of the bathtub was Tiffany who stared at him disappointedly. Kibum looked away guiltily as memories of last night suddenly returned. He'd gotten drunk again at a party, at which Tiffany had to drag him home from and care from him all night when the hangover hit. He was a lightweight, one bottle of beer would ruin him for the night, but he'd lost count after three.

“I can't do this anymore, Kibum. I'm done,” She whispered, wiping away a tear with the back of her hand.

“Fany,” Kibum said softly, sitting up straight. He grimaced and brought his hand to his throbbing head, telling himself that he'd never touch alcohol again.

Tiffany stood up suddenly, putting her hands on her hips. She stared down at him with hard eyes, disappointment spread across her face. "I told you to stop drinking but did you listen to me? No, of course not! Do you know how hard it is to get you home when you're stumbling and falling all over the place? Oh, let's not forget the fact that you ing reek of weed."

Kibum bowed his head again, feeling ashamed of himself. He hadn't meant to be such a burden to her and understood that it wasn't her responsibility to look after him, especially after he'd promised that he'd cool it with the drinking and smoking. If she wanted to scream and yell at him then he would let her; he didn't deserve anything less. At least it would be out of care for him, which was more than could be said for all the other people that decided to take their anger out on him.

“I can't do this anymore, Kibum. I hate seeing you fall apart each day," She told him, wiping away another tear. "I know that you're struggling but I can't stand by and watch you self-destruct. You can't just drown out your problems by getting high and drunk all the time."

“I’m sorry,” Kibum replied in a soft voice.

"I know you are, and I am too. When you're ready to help yourself for real, you know where to find me. Until then, I think it's best if we spend some time apart," Tiffany said, her voice cracking at the end. She bit her lip as she started crying harder, hurriedly leaving before she changed her mind.

Kibum watched her leave with sorrowful eyes, his heart clenching when he heard the front door slam. She wasn't going to come back this time and that scared him. Everyone that he loved was gone from his life, leaving him alone and unprotected from the horrors of the world. It hurt really badly, more than the pounding in his head. He stood up and moved over to the sink, pulling the cabinet door where there were several bottles of old prescriptions that had belonged to his parents. He took an orange bottle of sleeping pills and dumped several into his palm, popping them into his mouth and swallowing them without water.

I'm sorry Tiffany, he thought sitting down against the bathtub and closing his eyes, I won't be a burden to you anymore.

Kibum awoke with a jolt and his heart pounding.

"What the ?" He whispered, staring at the ceiling with wide eyes. He sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes tiredly as they adjusted to the sunlight seeping into his room from the window. He shook his head, pushing the strange dream from his mind as he got out of bed and headed for the bathroom. It had been a long time since he'd dreamt of Tiffany, at least the dreams that were memories of their time together. He'd had plenty of other dreams about her, which made him smirk at the thought of them.

Once he had finished washing his face and using the toiler, he left the bathroom and slowly walked down the stairs, making sure to skip the fifth step that always creaked loudly whenever someone stepped on it. When he reached the bottom of the stair he moved towards the kitchen but stopped when he heard the faint sound of crying floating through the air. He followed the sound down the hallway, stopping outside of Donghae's room. He slowly pushed the door open and his eyes widened at what he found.

“Donghae?" He said in surprise, walking into the room.

He tilted his head to the side, noticing the tears streaming down his brother's face. It made his heart hurt because he'd never seen Donghae cry before, and he was a pitiful crier. He sat on the bed next to him, putting his arm around his older brother, whom laid his head on his shoulder. They sat together in silence for several long moment until finally Donghae pulled away and looked at Kibum miserably.

"Eunhyuk broke up with me."