I had another nightmare last night. Only this one was different. 

It started out the same way, me trying to find everyone.But this time I found all of them.

Dead, lying together. Except one.

"You let them die" 

I turned and saw Jin standing behind me.

"You killed them?"

"No you did. You refused to make things better between us. This is what happened. You feared we would leave you. And you were right."

"Then why are you here."

 "Because Joon, you need me. I stay for you. You don't get it. I can't leave."

I watched as blood began to flow down his face.

"What's that?"

"My inner wounds becoming my outer."

I woke up screaming and Tae threw his arms around me. I never wanted to sleep again.

I shut my book and began coloring the pictures in my sketchbook trying not to think about the dream. I was still freaked the hell out even though I knew it was just a dream. 

As I colored I began to see what my therapist was talking about.They were gorgeous in color. 

Tae came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my shoulders.

"You ok Joon?"

I nodded "I'm fine for now." 

"Ok, I'm headed out with Jimin and kookie, we'll be back soon. Don't freak out too much." 

"Ok. See you soon."

"Bye."
I continued to color a smiling Kookie and noticed just how adorable he was. He was our baby and he needed so much love as our baby. And with hi