Eun Bong Hee stayed there in silence in his arms, her thoughts fleeting from how angelic his face to how she can conquer the abyss of feelings and thoughts in his mind and even the one in her own mind. 

After the long and lingering kiss they both shared in the courtroom, something stops her instantly. It was the image of him flinching from her kiss, the slight crack of her heart suddenly recalled in her brain and the thought of it happening again for a different reason instead stops her. Suddenly, a cloud of doubt fills her mind in a haze, but something else also snaps her out of her thoughts, and it had to be the most earth-shattering statement she heard from his mouth after a while.

"I love you." 

She held her breath, suddenly looking at him in shock. She suddenly loosened her grip on him, but he kept his firm grip on her waist. The sudden shock and fear in her mind suddenly comes back, and it seems as if these emotions suddenly maneuvered her thoughts and the words that left from seemed to break everything further into pieces.

"Are you sure?"

Ji Wook looked at her with a stunned expression, as if he couldn't believe what he heard from her. She held the arms that wrapped around her waist and tried to pull them apart, but even as much as he wanted to keep her there, he knew how she'll get angrier at him for not complying to her wishes. He dropped his arms to the side, looking at the expression on her face. She knew in his mind that this situation confused him to no extent, from the moment she ran up to hug him until the kisses they shared. 

"What do you mean if I'm sure?" He spoke calmly, but with a little aggravation in his voice. She knew that this was going to happen anyways.

"Ji Wook..." She started, sighing to herself. "How sure are you that you love me? How sure are you that this isn't just a feeling of sorrow for blaming it all on my father? How sure are you that what you're saying is true?"

He was silent, looking intently at her. "Are you sure that you love me? Are you sure that this is love that you're feeling and not some sort of sympathy?"

He was still silent, and the frustration is pushing her further into her words. "Please, if you're going to say those words, please make sure that what you're really feeling is love. Please don't say these things if you can't handle it somehow. I'll wait for you if you're not ready to say these words, trust me. But please, just...don't say you love me, unless you do."

She looked at him with an expression that mixed with fear and intent. Her luck with men isn't really the best, considering how ill-fated her recent relationships were. But her love for Noh Ji Wook was something that she was sure of, but at the same time it scared her. It scared her ever since the day that he couldn't even admit to her what was on his mind. It scared her on how far he can keep his thoughts to the point that she couldn't help him anymore. She wanted someone who could fully commit to her without holding back, and she wasn't even sure if Ji Wook was the one for her, despite the strong feelings she still harbors up to this day. 

"Ji Wook, I...I need someone who will be open to me no matter what. I need someone who's honest and someone who actually commits to their promises and their words. I need someone whom I can talk to without prejudice and who I can actually trust. I...I can't handle you hiding anything from me. I can't handle that kind of betrayal and heartbreak again." She spoke slowly as she tried to choke back the tears that were about to fall. 

"But you know what's weird?" She asked, trying to let out a chuckle to cover up her sadness. "Despite everything that happened, I still fall in love with you every single time. Even up to this moment, I still love you, I really do." 

She sighed to herself, looking at the floor instead to keep him from seeing her sorrow somehow. "I'll admit that I'm in love with a man who can't even keep his words and is dishonest up to no extent, to the point that I can't trust his words anymore."

She lets out a chuckle, and she shook her head at the thought of her loving him to no extent. She didn't know if he understood what she said, but she kept talking anyways. "How can I be sure if he misses me if he doesn't call me at all? How can I be sure that he's not affected when he flinches from my touch? How can I be sure that he'll say that he loves me when I know how dishonest can he get? How can I trust him after everything that happened?"

She thought to herself how pathetic and fickle she is after everything, but is she to be blamed? She went through a lot of things in her life that broke her to pieces, and she wasn't sure that if she let this man stay in her life for good, their ill-fated relationship would never change.

"I...I want commitment. I want honesty. I want devotion. I want 100% of you. Are you sure you can be that man for me?" She asked him, looking back at his face. Somehow, the unreadable expression on his face was enough to discourage her completely, and before anything else happened, she let out a small chuckle.

"I'm sorry, I'm asking for too much." She spoke. "I just—I'm sorry."

She was a stuttering mess afterwards as she avoided to meet his eyes. She moves away from him and takes her bag. She expected him to stop her or anything, but when she was about to move past him, he stood still, still not responding to anything she said. She bows in respect to him instead as she left. "I'm sorry, Prosecutor Noh."

She leaves the courtroom without the presence of anyone stopping her. It was like as if she got her answer the farther she got from the court up to the bus stop as she rode her way back to Ji Hye's apartment. She thought about how he stood there in silence as she asked him her questions. She never knew how loud someone's silence is until she saw him. She thought about how stupid she was for devoting herself for someone who's not even sure of being committed to her. It hurt her knowing that he didn't even say anything inside the room, as if he wasn't sure what to say to her, and the thought brought her to shed a few tears inside the bus until she stopped by the apartment. 

___

Two days of thinking and wallowing in her sorrow was not something that Bong Hee would do, but somehow it felt as if it was deemed necessary for her situation. Even Ji Hye was set on dumping her things across the street because not once has Bong Hee left the comfort of her own sofa, and also because the blanket was starting to stink. 

"Ya! Can't you at least freshen up for one bit? You haven't showered for two days for God's sake! You're stinking up the sofa!" Ji Hye exclaimed at the overstayed guest in her couch. Bong Hee sits upright to look at her instead, a distressed look on her face. 

"Ji Hye, I think...I think I turned fickle all of a sudden." She started. "It's like—is it wrong to ask someone for their commitment and honesty after everything else that happened before?"

Ji Hye sighed at Bong Hee's question. "Aish, what has gotten into you all of a sudden for you to ask that question? If you want to know what I think, you're right for asking him that question. If he can't do it for you, then you need to find someone else worth your time—" 

A buzz from the door suddenly cuts her sentence, and Na Ji Hye walked towards the door only to find an unexpected guest standing behind it. 

"Good day, Prosecutor Na. Would you mind if I would speak to Bong Hee for a second?" Ji Wook's voice was enough for her to hide under the blanket and lay down on the couch.

"Please do. The sofa's going to stink if you don't get her out of here." Ji Hye pleaded to him. Bong Hee makes a face underneath the blanket at Ji Hye's words. Wow, she thought. To think she gave me advice on avoiding him and now she's asking him to go out with him, just my luck. She heard someone's footsteps come closer to the couch, and suddenly a warm presence is beside her. 

"Eun Bong Hee." Ji Wook started to speak. "We need to talk."

"What if I'm not ready? I look like a bird's nest right now." She asked him, still underneath the blanket as she was not willing to talk to him just yet. 

"Do we really have to go through this again?" He whispered to himself as he sighed in exasperation. She felt a warm hand grab onto the edge of the blanket above her face, and it was slowly pulled down, only to have the rays of the sun blind her eyes for one second. She suddenly turned away from him as she was not willing to face him at this state. 

"Bong Hee..." He pleaded quietly towards her. "I just need five minutes. Please, listen to me."

Bong Hee stayed silent for a moment as she contemplated for a moment, but she got up willingly and walked out the room first, with Ji Wook walking behind her. When the two of them got out of the apartment complex, Ji Wook lead the way, and when he stopped to face her, Bong Hee stopped at a considerate distance from him. 

"I tried calling you for a lot of times now." He said as he put his hands on his hips.

"My phone battery died, and I didn't charge it." She said sheepishly before diverting her attention on the concrete patterns beneath her. 

The radio silence that followed afterwards was enough for her to cringe internally. What were they supposed to say now? Why did it take so long for him to talk to her? Oh no, she thought. Maybe this is our closure. Maybe this is where everything ends— 

"I'm sure." He spoke suddenly, making her head look up towards him. She didn't exactly understood the context of his words at first, but then he started to talk.

"I'm sure that what I feel for you is not sympathy. I'm sure that what I'm saying is true." He looked at her intently before he continued. "I know that things will never be back to the way they were, but I'm sure that I'll do my best for us to have a great future no matter what."

He stepped closer to her as he continued with his words. "I will be open with you. I'll talk to you over anything that's on my mind. I will be honest with everything I say and do. I won't keep secrets from you anymore."

She watched as he took her small hands in his, his thumb running down her palms in a calming manner. "I will give you commitment, honesty and devotion. You can have my entire being if you let me, just as long as you'll do the same for me too."

She looked up to see a solemn expression in his face as he paused to look at her. "I need you to be honest with me too. I need you to tell me somehow what's going on in your mind. If you have any problem, we can do it together, you and me. I don't want you to suffer alone if that's what you're worried about. I promise that you'll fall in love with a man that keeps his promises and will be honest to you to no extent. You can trust me, I swear on that."

He then puts his arms around her waist, not caring about the current state of the woman in front of him as he looked at her with utmost honesty. "I, Noh Ji Wook, am a hundred—no, a thousand percent committed and a thousand percent sure that I am in love with you, Eun Bong Hee."

She was the one who stayed silent next, but she was carefully gazing at his eyes if there was any hint of doubt and dishonesty in them. He noticed this too, and just when the speck of doubt was about to grow in her thoughts, she noticed the intent in his eyes as he said the words. 

"I love you, Eun Bong Hee. I am very much in love with you."

She smiled in relief to herself as she put her arms around his neck and slid her hands down the sides of his neck, her thumb tracing his jaw. "You really mean it?"

He nods at her, a small smile on his face. "I mean it with my entire soul."

He tried to lean in for a kiss, but Bong Hee suddenly got the feeling of insecurity knowing that she hasn't showered for a few days. "Wait—Wait! I haven't taken a bath yet."

He still leaned in to give her a kiss on her forehead anyways. "Aish, I still love you even if you haven't showered in a while."

"You're sure, hm?" She taunted him as she moved a little farther away from him, knowing how she probably smells at this moment. Ji Wook moves forward and kisses her intently on her lips, causing Bong Hee to squeal at him.

"One hundred percent." He said, before telling her to get ready since he'll take her out for the day, thinking about how he'll get used to having this for the long run, or maybe even forever—that is, if fate lets them be happy for a long time. 

_____

A/N: I didn't know how to end this well omfg please forgive me

Alsooooooo I know I said I might do more sad/angsty drabbles but this has been in my mind for a long time and I couldn't really finish it during my spare time since the story in my mind keeps changing since I had to relate this to the actual scene that happened in the drama. Anyhow I'm sorry if this was a bit cliché and frustrating (in my opinion actually lmao) at some parts please do forgive me for that. 

I'll actually try and make the rest of the next few drabbles really angsty since I've got some requests that seem interesting to actually write. Hope I didn't disappoint that much. Anyways, thank you for reading this anyways :)