Cheolyong cursed, realizing how late he was for the stage in the MBC. Again. This was all his fault, he admitted. He was caught up in a mission and when he finally send the target off through the boatman they had been doing trade for a while already, only then he remembered that he got a stage in half an hour. Well, there was also those endless miss-calls and about forty raging voicemails from four of his hyungs asking him to hurry to the MBC.

          Cheolyong stumbled out of the pink car and went running into the building without even saying goodbye to Jinwoon who was openly laughing at his lateness. The golden bell he found in the abandoned apartment of which he had turned into a pendant with black rope wrapped around his neck jingle slightly at his wild movement. Damn that rascal who is no help! Why did he drive so slow anyway? And why did I even have him drive the car? Oh yea… Because I have to change into the stage outfit on the road. Ugh! I'm dead.

          Running up the stairs instead of waiting for the elevator, Cheolyong didn't expect to bump shoulder with someone and he heard some kind of unique tinkling sound almost like a bell, which he was sure overlapped with his own bell on his chest but he didn't care to look back or anything as he kept on running towards the level where he was supposed to be by this time.

          He kept on running through the hallway, ducking around and sliding among the other idols and celebrities walking past his way until he finally reached the room for MBLAQ but stopped abruptly when the chiming bell echoed inside his mind. Frowning, he looked downed to the golden bell pendant resting on his chest and stared for a moment before everything clicked inside his head. That sound! That bell! The stalker! I am such an idiot!

          Cheolyong turn on his heels and was about to head back to the exit but even before he got to take a step, his hand was grabbed and he was spun on his heels to face a very much pissed off leader.

          "Where the hell did you go?" The leader seethed, fire burning inside his dark orbs as he yanked the MBLAQ maknae to followed him towards the backstage. We only have three minutes before the rehearsal and the MBC crews are breathing down my neck!" He nagged. "Not to mention I have to calm Changsun down because that stupid stalker leave bloody words on the mirror in our resting room. I don't even know how or when that bastard got in there. Please don't add to my problem already, Cheolyong! I'm tired as it is." He said and tugged harsher on the maknae's hand.

          Cheolyong jerked forward and winced slightly at the force. He had injured his waist again while doing his mission just now when he was thrown against a table and he had been enduring the pain but Seungho pulling him around like this wasn't helping with the pain. "Mianhaeyo, hyungnim. I was busy."

          "Busy with what? With your manga again? Here he is!" Seungho announced and tossed Cheolyong into the arms of the make-up artists and hair stylist as well as their coordinator noona and Cheolyong felt all blurry and hands all over him until he was pushed up the stage and found himself doing the routine dance and his part diligently. If only Jiman is not my superior. I would have long killed him for sending me to be an idol on top of all those mission. Cheolyong kept on grumbling on his mind as they finished their rehearsal and went down to monitor their stage before readying themselves for the real recording.

          It had been even more hectic these days with their overlapping schedule and though Cheolyong realized Changsun was still very much depressed from the harassment of the crazed fan, it seemed that the older was recovering well and was cheerful again at a few moments just like when their messing around with each other in the practice room and the other MBLAQ members were always there for the dancer that it somehow amazed Cheolyong. Even today, Changsun seemed fine, interacting with the fans and people around him alike with an easy smile on his face despite what Seungho had told him about the bloody words on the mirror just now. But then he saw how Seungho and Sanghyun barely left Changsun's side and sometimes one of them would hold the dancer's hand, a gesture showing them they were here and would lend their strength and would be there if Changsun needed them. They do have quite strong brotherhood, do they… And it almost crept Cheolyong out that he actually understand those silent gesture. Maybe because after all, he was really one of them…

          Cheolyong hissed when someone bumped on his back with something hard. It was one of the crew carrying the heavy recording camera, simply apologizing before slinking away to do his work and Cheolyong just clicked his tongue in annoyance. His back was really beaten up and he needed some rest already!

          Byunghee whom had noticed the foul mood coming from the maknae, unable to concentrate on Changsun, besides, Seungho and Sanghyun would be enough for Changsun and it seemed he was the only one to notice something was wrong with Cheolyong. Byunghee sighed and glanced at where Seungho, Changsun and Sanghyun were standing at the edge of the stage together and that was when he saw Sanghyun who was glancing at Cheolyong once with worries in his eyes before Sanghyun finally turned to meet his eyes silently pleading for him to take care of their maknae. After all, they have already passed that stage to understand words between them without uttering them. Byunghee smiled comfortingly. Sanghyun didn't need to ask. He was about to do exactly that. He then approached the younger and rubbed onto Cheolyong's arm soothingly. "Cheolyong… Are you okay? You look pale."

          Cheolyong grinned. "Why would I look pale under an inch thick foundation. What the heck are you seeing, hyung?" He joked.

          Byunghee rolled his eyes. "You are fine, huh." He turned away but stopped when he heard Cheolyong's forced breathing like the younger was in pain. He cursed inside his mind. Cheolyong had been hurting for a few times already. He knew despite Cheolyong probably thought he was totally clueless. Not just him, maybe the others had noticed too about that fact eventhough they never really talked about it between them. And he didn't think much about it before but now, Cheolyong was obviously enduring a lot of pain and he couldn't just pretend not to know. "Cheolyong."

          "Hmm?"

          "Are you sure you're okay?"

          Cheolyong smiled. "Yea, I'm fine. Just feeling a bit under the weather. I probably getting down with cold."

          Bull. You're hurting! Byunghee held in his incoming sigh and carved a pretense smile on his face. "Okay… If you say so." He said, defeat could be heard in his voice. Maybe he really should trust the maknae and get the performance done perfectly.

          And if only he knew how much he would regret for believing Cheolyong. He had been the one to first notice Cheolyong's disappearance from the stage. They had done a turn for their routine dance and when he was faced ahead again, he realized the spot right beside him where Cheolyong should have been standing at was in fact empty.

          Byunghee was lost for a moment as his body went on autopilot with the dance routine, mind totally blank, merely following the flow of their choreography until his part came up again when he finally heard people yelling for help and a small crowd slowly forming down the stage and the MBLAQ music was stopped. "CHEOLYONG!" He shouted in horror when he saw the maknae in the middle of the crowd, lying on his stomach, unmoving under the stage. Not even minding the high distance between the stage and the ground, Byunghee jumped off the stage carelessly and ran to the maknae's side.

          The main vocalist held Cheolyong's arms and tried to flip the maknae to lie on his back but stopped himself at the painful moan escaping Cheolyong's lips. Cheolyong's eyes were tightly squeezed together, color leaving his face and cold sweat forming all over his skin. The maknae was in immense pain.

          Byunghee swallowed loudly, feeling his heart shrink when Cheolyong whimpered at the pain and shivered on the cold floor. He wanted to retrieve the maknae's frail body into his hold and protected the maknae with all he had but he knew better. His every touch was just going to hurt the maknae even more.

          "What just happened?"

          At Changsun's nearing voice, Byunghee was about to push the dancer back but Seungho was faster, holding back both Changsun and Sanghyun from rushing to the maknae. "Don't touch him." Seungho ordered. "Have you called the ambulance?" The leader asked calmly at the crews gathered around and one of them nodded.

          "B-but, hyung." Changsun protested, trying to get closer to the maknae lying abandoned on the floor.

          "Don't! We're going to hurt him more if we move him carelessly." Seungho explained and relieved when Changsun finally nodded in understanding and decided to go over to the shocked Sanghyun instead to calm the visual maknae down. "Byunghee." Seungho turned to the main vocalist and draped one arm over the stunned young man, pulling him closer to himself, knowing how shaken Byunghee right now as they watch their maknae writhing with pain and injuries while feeling helpless. And not to mention how much guilt was trying to drown Seungho up remembering the way he had scolded the maknae not too long ago. "It's okay. He'll be fine."

          Sighing, he let his eyes fixed on the maknae's frail figure, holding himself back because he knew none of them could do anything and all they could do was just watching from the side until the help came.

###################

What happened? Ugh… My head feels heavy… Augh! Why is the light so bright?

          Blinking a few times, it took a long time for Cheolyong to finally adjust to the bright light in the room. His hand went up to his head, massaging slightly his temple as he groaned softly. He felt very heavy, not just his head, but his whole body, even lifting his hand to massage his head was hard enough.

          "You're awake? How do you feel?"

          Cheolyong looked to his side and saw a man in a white coat standing there with clerking board in hand and nurse standing not too far behind the doctor.

          "Sedative is wearing off it seems. I'll give you some oral painkillers for now while we waited for you X-ray." The doctor explained and left before Cheolyong could even comprehend what that man was talking about until he felt sharp pain across his back causing him to hiss.

          "What happened?" Cheolyong asked to the nurse who stayed behind, shuffling in bed restlessly as he couldn't find the position to reduce the pain crawling down his spine and even his legs felt almost numb.

          "You fall off the stage during your performance. Your manager said, you already didn't look well before the accident." The nurse explained.

          Cheolyong pursed his lips and tried hard to remember. And flashes of faces hovering over him came in blurry images. Seungho, Byunghee, Changsun and even Sanghyun were looking so worried for him and their voices echoed through his ears, calling his name in frantic concern. Hurm… So that's what happened…

          "Well, my back kind of hurting since this morning." Cheolyong admitted once he got his thought back in one piece. He remembered this morning waking up to a really painful back given that Jinwoon and him had done three mission and all ended up with them having to face some tough rivals.

          And it became harder because the mission ordered them specifically not to kill their target but wrapped them up alive in a gift box and ship them to a given address. It would have been easier to just kill instead of trying to get them alive without hurting those target too much. Not to mention each of their targets got really tough underlings as bodyguard. As expected, dealing with politicians were definitely not an easy task.

          Cheolyong didn't know how he managed to go through the months after that almost flopped mission and with added injuries from the latest mission. Maybe thanks to all the training he went through, the pain was nothing to him. But that was only what he thought. His body couldn't take it anymore and look where he ended up now.

          "Here, this will help with the pain." The nurse gave two pills which Cheolyong took without much noise. "And here is the hospital clothes." The nurse handed over a white clothes with small green flowers pasted all over the white clothes and chuckled when he saw the disgusted look on Cheolyong's face. "I'm just saying, but it's going to look good on you."

          "I look good wearing anything." Cheolyong joked, jerking his brows a few times calling a set of laughter coming from the nurse. "Why are you laughing? Don't you think I look good?"

          "Our maknae is flirting with a white angel?" Changsun burst into the room dramatically like a disappointed mother with the three others laughing their heart out in the background before the nurse could reply to Cheolyong.

          "Hey! Don't take over my mother's role!" Byunghee nagged, pushing Changsun aside.

          Red leaked into the nurse's cheeks and she scuttled out of the room after bowing politely with shy smile.

          "Ooooh~ She is sooo into you." Seungho teased, wearing a erted smile.

          Cheolyong jutted his tongue out. "Yea, if only you guys didn't step in my way!"

          "Hey! That's not the right way to talk to the older." Seungho playfully smacked the maknae's head.

          Cheolyong rubbed his head. "I'm a patient. Why don't you just picked up the IV stand and hit me all over." He shot with a pout and a glare to… The wall… Maknae wouldn't dare to glare directly at the leader after all.

          "Good idea actually." Seungho said, inching closer to the IV stand.

          "Okay, see this red button?" Cheolyong pointed to the small round button just above the head of the bed. "I'm going to press this and tell them to throw all of you out."

          "Hey! I didn't do anything!" Came Sanghyun's protest from the couch across the room where he had lied down comfortably while reading a health magazine.

          "You dare!" Seungho scolded and jumped on the maknae, but immediately regretted hearing a whimper came from under him. He was about to apologize when he felt Cheolyong poking his sensitive waist.

          "Get off of me you savage heavy panda!" Cheolyong struggled.

          "Hey, it's not like I don't enjoy watching you torture the rude maknae, but he's still hurt." Byunghee came to save the day and pulled Seungho from Cheolyong, watching empathically at the maknae who was huffing on the bed, looking a little bit paler after the 'attack'. "Does it still hurt?" He asked softly.

          Cheolyong grinned up at Byunghee. "Not really. But I'm tired." He whispered, eyelids drooping slowly. "You guys can go home first." Cheolyong said.

          The other four exchanged a look before Byunghee silently gestured all of them to leave while he stayed behind, pulling a chair next to Cheolyong's bed. "Cheolyong-ah." He started after the rest had filed out of the room.

          "Hmm?"

          "I've been wanting to talk about something with you."

          Cheolyong's eyes opened again and he raised one brow at Byunghee in a questioning manner.

          "You… How to say this?" Byunghee rubbed his nape as his eyes flickered everywhere but to Cheolyong. "We are worried about you. When I saw you fall off the stage, hell, I was so scared for you. All of us was so scared." His face turned serious as he squeezed Cheolyong's hand in his, his hand felt cold around Cheolyong's. "You know we love you right?"

          Cheolyong chuckled weakly, squeezing back Byunghee's cold hand. He was truly tired. "Yep, I know that, hyung."

          "But you… You push us away." Byunghee sighed. "Why do you push us away?"

          Cheolyong's eyes clicked opened fully before his features slowly twisted into a frown. "What are you talking about? When did I ever push any of you away? Look, I even got closer to Sanghyun hyung, am I?"

          "Cheolyong…" Byunghee took Cheolyong's hand, squeezing it slightly. "You think I didn't notice?" He asked and smiled sadly when the maknae avoided his eyes. I was right. "You're not opening up to us. You acted as if everything was fun and like we're totally close brothers but I know better. You kept a distance now and then. Just like now. You could have just let us stay with you here and take care of you but you gave the final say and send us home just like that. Are you that reluctant to depend on us? Even if I tell you that it is our job as your hyungs?"

          Cheolyong shook his head. "You're wrong." He denied weakly.

          "Why are you so afraid to get close to us, Cheolyong? We're a team. We're friends. We live in the same house. We met each other more than we met our own family. Why are you putting a wall between us? And honestly, each of us sincerely care for you but it almost look like you won't even acknowledge our feeling."

          Cheolyong chewed on his bottom lips. He didn't expect any of the MBLAQ members would notice. He thought he had play his character well enough to shade the truth.

          "Sanghyun told me." Byunghee continued after a few seconds of silence. "About last time we went to Tokyo when you have to share a room with him. He told me how you were not trying to keep the conversation between you two going."

          "I was tired." Cheolyong gave an excuse. An excuse that even he, himself, thought was lame.

          "Bull, Cheolyong. Tell me. What are you afraid of?"

          Cheolyong didn't answer. He retreated his hand slowly from Byunghee's grasp and let his eyes fall on the wall. He waited until he heard defeated sigh from Byunghee and the chair scraping against the floor as Byunghee stood up.

          "Have a rest. We'll come to visit again tomorrow. Oh yea. Before I forget, Byungki hyung asked me to tell you that in a few weeks, we'll be recording a carol song. You should be recovering well by then. He wants to make an unofficial video for our upcoming event with the fan this coming winter, so I thought we could handle some props like the Christmas tree and maybe some-"

          "Wait." Cheolyong interrupted when the light bulb in his mind blinked and some of the puzzles worked together. "Christmas tree?" He asked slowly.

          Byunghee nodded. "Remember when we did the cover for a carol song last time? We have.. Hurm what was her name again? Oh yea, Minyoung-shi! She sponsored us the Christmas tree and the decoration, remember? We thought of visiting that shop again and maybe we will still be lucky this time since we all know she fancies Changsun."

          Cheolyong frowned. Did the harassment start from back then? That bell… I knew I had heard that unique soft tinkling of the bell somewhere before! But the one I bumped at the stairs was a guy though…  "Hyung. The store is at the same place, right?" He asked.

          Byunghee shrugged. "I think so. It will be our lost if they moved already." Byunghee bent down slightly and half hug the maknae. "You don't have to think much about it. We will settle it just fine. You can leave that to us. Get well soon, maknae. And…" Byunghee trailed off, his eyes looked sad for a moment before the older shook his head. "Nevermind. I just hope, you'll give us chance and trust us like your real brothers. We'll talk about this again later. Bye."

          Sound of feet shuffling and later the door closed softly. And Cheolyong knew, not only Byunghee noticed. Seungho too. He had noticed the leader hiding behind the wall, listening in to the conversation in the room before both of the older members of MBLAQ walked away. He knew. He was trained to notice such thing after all.

          "This is getting complicated." Cheolyong sighed.

          "I know right. Your hyungs care a lot about you."

          Cheolyong glared at Jinwoon who popped out of nowhere and took a seat at the edge of the bed. "Why are you here?"

          "Worried for my dearest partner." Jinwoon smiled cheekily. "Is this what you're afraid of?"

          Cheolyong rolled his eyes and let his body sunk deeper into the fluffy bed. "Shut up. I just don't want them to get in my way. Sooner or later, I'll leave if not die."

          "Such an optimist." Jinwoon jibed, rolling his eyes.

          "What? We can't exactly expect much with this kind of live we're living. I'm just being a realist."

          "You know… There is still hope." Jinwoon flinched when a pair of brown eyes shoot him with strong suspicion.

          "Jinwoon… What are you hiding from me?"

          "Let's just say… If you're given a chance to choose between South and North-"

          "There's no such thing." Cheolyong cut the other off.

          "Let's just say there is." Jinwoon pestered. "Which will you choose?"

          Cheolyong sighed, pulling himself up and rest his back against the headboard. "My country is North. It doesn't matter how ed up that place is, it is the place where I was born, the only place that I could call home." Somehow, Cheolyong felt he was trying to convince himself with his words. Because, however strongly he tried to deny it, he was falling for the kindness and the people of South. Especially the MBLAQ members… Them claiming spots inside his heart, was scaring him because he knew he was wavering. And he might soon falter.

          Jinwoon grimaced, his hands clenched the bed sheet. "Just because we're born there, that doesn't make it our home." He hissed, pushing himself up to stand on his feet. "I'll make sure when the time comes, you won't make a wrong choice. Even if you'll blame me, loathe me, I'll make sure you make the right decision. Because everything I do wasn't for myself only. You have to remember that. Please remember that." He leaned closer to Cheolyong and grabbed his shoulder, eyes staring deep into the other pair of eyes who was looking back at him questioningly. "And remember this too. Even if you told me we are no friend, just comrade, I still regard you as my friend. My precious friend."

          "Jinwoon, you…" Cheolyong's features slowly contorted into a frown but he didn't get to finish when Jinwoon pulled away from him.

          "Rest. I have to head back now or my hyungs will be worried." Jinwoon said, heading towards the door, halting for a moment only to say, "Get well soon, friend."