It had only been a week since they had that talk but for Kim, it already felt like years. No matter how hard she tried to deny it to herself, she just missed Gerald and she hated it. How in the world was she supposed to let go of her stupid feelings when she already missed him the very moment he turned to leave?

“Get a life, Kim! Get a life!” Kim commanded to herself as she turned her alarm clock off. It was six o’clock of Sunday morning and she was already up and awake. For the first time since she joined show business, she was up even before the clock snoozed. The truth was, she had been practically up the whole night and she had not been sleeping well for the week that was.

Her phone rang and she quickly picked it up. “Hello?”

“Hi Kim!” Came a woman’s chirping greeting.

“Ate Imee.” Kim couldn’t tell if it was the sound of relief in her voice when she realized that it was her Ate Imee on the other end of the line. Stupid as it may seem, she still hoped that it was Gerald. She was used to have him call her in the morning even for no reason at all. Or was she disappointed that it was not him?

“Are you alright?” Imee asked sensing the sadness in Kim’s voice. “You sound like you woke up on the wrong side of the bed…”

“I’m okay, Ate. I’m just having a slight headache, nag-oversleep kasi ako.” She reasoned out while keeping her fingers crossed, hoping that her Ate Imee didn’t catch her lie.

“Ganun ba? Anyway, you really need to get back to work. Tapos na yung vacation na hiningi mo…”

Kim sighed. She did ask for a time off to pick up the pieces and to compose herself. The week that was may felt like years but now it was over and it was time to get back to reality.

“Alam ko po. Are you dropping by so we could go to the station together?” Kim consciously tried to sound enthusiastic about the idea of reporting back for work.

“Magkita na lang tayo dun. May dadaanan pa kasi ako, okay lang ba?”

“Sure Ate. See you later.”

Kim dropped the phone and slumped in her bed. 

“This is it, Kim! Kailangan mo tong panindigan.” She closed her eyes and prayed that she would be able to get through this day. Gerald would surely be around and she wondered if she was ready to see him again…

When she went out of the house, her heart skipped the moment she saw the pink car that Gerald had given her for her 18th birthday. That gift meant a lot to her not because she had always wished for a pink car but for the very reason that Gerald was the one who had given it to her.

Kim found herself standing in front of the car and as if in a trance, she opened the door and got inside. She just sat there for a long time and when she came out, she asked her driver to cover it.

“Goodbye Bubblegum.” She muttered as she took one last glance at the pink car before turning to leave. She and Gerald had nicknamed the pink car, “Bubblegum” because of its color.

Kim mentally noted that as part of her “moving on checklist” she should try her best not to use Bubblegum. No, not that she would return the car to Gerald because she knew that even if she did, Gerald would never take it back. She just knew that driving Bubblegum would bring back too many memories for her to confront with.

In spite of the bad traffic, Kim was still able to make it to the station ahead of time, much to her dismay. She didn’t want to be there early and neither would she want to stay any longer than needed. She’s just not comfortable with the thought that Gerald will be within her 1 kilometer-radius.

She had always looked forward to Sundays but now, she wished that she could be elsewhere. As she checked for the time, Kim realized that it would still take about half an hour before ASAP would start. Undeniably the longest thirty minutes of her life.

Kim went straight to the dressing room and settled herself in what seemed like empty open cabinets. It was her favorite place to sit and for some reason, she had always felt comfortable sitting there even if there are plenty of more spacious, cushioned lounge chairs scattered in studio’s dressing room.

The stillness of the room walked her back to the days when she and Gerald would sit on the very same spot and talk, tickle and laugh their hearts out. Kim realized that sitting on one of their favorite “spots” is a habit too difficult to break.

In only a matter of minutes, someone else rushed in. Suddenly, time froze for both of them as they realized the awkwardness of the situation.

Their eyes met for a moment but Kim was the first one to look away.

“I…I just need to get something.” Gerald said, not knowing what to do.

“It’s okay.” Kim answered, trying to compose herself as much as she could. “I was going out anyway…” She lied and then stood up to leave. Gerald even held the door for her as she made her way out not sparing him a second look.

When Gerald was then left alone, he closed the door and for what seemed like eternity, just leaned his back against it. It was the first time that he saw Kim after the fateful night which turned his world around. He had thought about her everyday. There was never a time that he did not contemplated on calling her up or going to her house just to see her. He had a lot on his mind and there were so many things that he felt he needed to discuss with her, if only he knew what exactly they were.

Out of habit, Gerald made his way to where Kim was earlier seated. That was their favorite place and this used to be a happy place for both of them but now, he was there all by himself and it didn’t feel right.

He wasn’t expecting to see Kim that day. When he did, he had an overwhelming urge to engulf her in a hug. But none of that transpired because a sudden rush of emotions came to him the moment he saw her, leaving him rooted to his spot.

Gerald felt like he was being tortured the whole time. Kim was there but it felt entirely different because they were not talking and the whole studio was just too small a space for two people who were obviously avoiding each other.

“Bro, are you okay?” Matt asked Gerald and sat beside him after their production number. “You seem so preoccupied out there and then, I don’t know, the next minute blanko ka na. You hardly miss a step sa sayaw pero kanina, you were not in it.”

Gerald figured out that among his peers, Matt would be the first one to notice and here he was now, asking if he was okay. Matt meant well but Gerald thought that it was better to be silent about the whole thing. The situation was already complicated by itself and the less people would know, the easier it would be for Kim and him. He hoped.

“I’m okay Matt.” He answered. “Hindi nga lang ako nakatulog ng maayos kagabi…” His unwanted confession didn’t go unnoticed by his good friend.

“Got you there!” Matt exclaimed. “At bakit ka hindi makatulog? Something is indeed bothering you…or should I say, someone?” He teased some more.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Gerald tried to dismiss Matt’s inquisition.

“Hmmm. I smell something here. Nangangamoy LQ!” Matt said in suspicion then looked around and saw Kim in one corner. “Kayo ba ni Kim eh may LQ?”

Gerald followed Matt’s gaze and that’s when he saw Kim. There she was, all by herself when they used to talk during breaks.

“Anong LQ?” He tried to sound as casual as he could.

“Lover’s quarrel. Ano ka ba?” Matt explained and then he turned serious as he looked back to Gerald. 

“Kanina ko pa kasi napapansin. You and Kim are not talking. Is something wrong? Baka naman makatulong ako.”

Gerald shook his head but Matt pressed on.

“Owwss…talaga lang ha?”

“Talaga.” Gerald exclaimed giving Matt a light punch on his arm to drive his point.

“Okay, madali naman akong kausap eh!” Matt shrugged his shoulders much to Gerald’s relief but only for a second. “Kung talagang wala kayong LQ, ba’t hindi mo siya lapitan? I think she needs a drink.”

Gerald closed his eyes. Matt just wouldn’t give up but he also had a point. Kim needs a drink after the dance number she just had with other ASAP girls and he thought, well, this might be a good time to do something for her.

He took a pair of Starbucks thermal mugs from his bag, both items were sporting the same design but one was colored pink and the other was blue. The mugs were gifts from a fan. He had been the one taking care of those mugs for both of them. With their two-year of partnership in showbiz they have somewhat developed an organized way of making sure that they both have what they needed during long hours of work. He made sure that all their eating utensils and sleeping paraphernalia are washed and ready for use for their next assignment. He even bought a big cooler for all the stuff which has been a permanent accessory in the back of his Ford Explorer. Meanwhile, Kim took care of their refreshments and first aid kit especially when they are on location shoots.

Looking intently at the pink mug, Gerald sighed at the thought that it could also be one of the things that he would need to part ways in the near future.
He didn’t know what to tell her but he could at least try. Mustering as much courage as he can, Gerald filled up her mug with cold water and walked towards her.

“I think you need something to drink.” He said as he handed her the mug.

Kim hesitantly took it from him without saying a word.

“Kim…ahm. Can we talk?” He asked. “I…”

“Gerald please…” Kim interrupted. “I’ve already said my piece. You don’t have to tell me how stupid I am dahil tanggap ko naman yun.” Kim tried her best to lower her voice afraid that they would be heard by others.

“Kim, ano ka ba! Don’t say that. You’re not stupid, okay?” He turned himself to face her to better gauge her reaction, hoping to see a change on her stern look but then he was disappointed.

“Well, maybe I’m not stupid. I’m crazy.” Kim faked a strong front.

“Kim, I’m really sorry. I never meant to…”

“Gerald, I’ve already made up my mind.” She said with full conviction and then stood up to leave. “I can’t go on with the love team anymore. Hindi ko na kaya. Hayaan mo na lang ako, please.”

Gerald could sense the pain in Kim’s eyes, it was now blurred with moisture and she was just about, ready to cry.

His knees trembled and his stomach lurched that all he could do was nod.

“Thanks for this.” Kim raised the mug. “Ako na ang bahala dito.”

It was all what he could think about that evening. Kim was hurting and he was hurting too. He hated to admit the fact that they were slowly drifting apart. These were things that he never wanted nor expected to happen to them and boy, it was not giving him a good feeling at all.

Their mother network have tried to protect Gerald and Kim’s individual showbiz careers by breaking the news of the country’s favorite love team’s split as slowly and as quietly as possible.

This meant that Gerald and Kim were to discreetly build their solo careers thus there were still instances wherein they would appear on the same show, be in the same production number in ASAP and do together several marketing activities as dictated by their product endorsement contracts.

As the weeks progressed, Gerald’s efforts to hide the pain and uneasiness with the situation became fruitless particularly when their paths crossed during rehearsals, workshops, TV guestings and mall shows.

What drew the line for Gerald was the incident while he and Kim were on their regular Sunday workshop with other Star Magic talents. They were asked by Ms. Malou, their workshop moderator to find a partner for their warm up exercise. Since most of the talents have established a solid partner during workshops, Kim and Gerald were left alone, standing listlessly, on the opposite sides of the room. The estranged friends looked warily at each other, unaware that Ms. Malou was observing their silent exchange keenly.

In her most authoritative voice, Ms. Malou barked, “Ano na? Magtititigan na lang ba kayong dalawa? Kim, Gerald, dito nga kayo sa gitna! All the rest, umupo muna kayo sa gilid!”

Gerald snapped out of his musings as he heard Ms. Malou’s irate directions and dragged himself at the middle of the room. Kim on the other hand maintained her non-committal stance.

“Kimmy, wag mong sabihing ngayon ka pa magpapaka-prinsesa! Wala akong pakialam kung may LQ kayo ni Gerald. Klaro naman tayo di ba na pag nasa loob kayo ng klase ko e susunod kayo kesehodang kayo ang pinakasikat na mga artista dito sa Pilipinas!” Ms. Malou snapped. She knew that Kim and Gerald went through a lot lately but she’s been their acting coach for the past couple of years and was just frustrated that their emotional turmoil was hindering their drive to become better actors. From day one, Ms. Malou had zoomed in on the two young stars produced by the first PBB Teen Edition. She recognized their raw talent and undeniable chemistry on screen immediately that’s why she’s one of those who vouched for the two teens during their early days in the industry. And through the years she had developed with them a good relationship, one built on mutual trust and respect.

That afternoon, Kim’s action was a clear indication that she’s defying Ms. Malou’s instructions for the first time.

Suddenly, Gerald felt his throat tighten. Hot tears threatened to spill from his eyes. He missed her but seeing her like this was hurting him all the more. He knew that Kim values her work. They’d been really good friends and colleagues for a long, long time and had shared some truly happy memories together but even those things could not alter the fact that he needed to let her go – if only to spare her from more pain and to protect her from ugly incidents like what transpired during the workshop.

“I’d miss you Kimmy… I’m so sorry…” He was talking to her picture, the one that was on his bedside table. His tears flowed freely as his heart bled for the loss of a treasure friendship. He would never be able to hold her hand whenever she feels cold during late night tapings, no more Kim to talk to whenever something’s bothering him. He would miss tickling her and laughing with her. They would never be voted as “best love team”. There would be nothing to look forward to anymore… at least as far as their partnership is concerned.

It’s the right thing to do, Gerald reminded himself. He could not deny the fact of their love team was slowly killing his spirit as an actor; it has also afflicted him on a personal level. He had not been functioning well and had lost his focus. Gerald also recognized the sad truth that he was unintentionally pulling Kim down with him…

“I’m letting you go, Kim.” He softly said while still looking at her picture. Hers was an image of down-to-earth bliss and innocent optimism. He wanted her to stay that way. Letting her go was the least he could do. It was not a matter of whether he could survive the ordeal.

The question is did he really want to go through life with a missing part of him?